Contrary to popular belief, here at DealBreaker, we like to look out for the little people. We’re all “Big Brothers” (and Sisters); every Wednesday night we play Bingo with a bunch of senior citizens; and we’ve all adopted several Cambodian children (legally). Carney was actually a stray kitten that we kept leaving milk outside the door for until one morning when we just decided to take the little guy in and he became the tiger you see before you.
Which was why, upon opening our copy of Greenwich Time last evening, our hearts broke to read about a terrible phenomenon that’s been going on in the town CNN Money ranked 12th on its list of the 100 Best Places to Live in the United States in 2005, where Mel Gibson has a home (and therefore, has been pulled over for drunk driving) and The Ice Storm, The Stepford Wives and parts of a student film we had a small but award-winning role in junior year of college were filmed. If you could see us now (and a few of you with whom we’ve exchanged WebCam capabilities with can), you’d see two people who are thanking god they wore waterproof mascara this morning because they are just barely holding back tears that are pleading to come out (mostly Carney though, I’m not really a crier).
Complaints of pilots straying from published approach patterns for Westchester County Airport and beginning their noisy descent over Greenwich instead of Long Island Sound are so common that residents have a name for the phenomenon: Cutting the corner.
“Cutting the corner has been such a long-standing problem,” said Selectman Peter Crumbine.
Many residents have their theories why some pilots approaching the airport are making the required U-turn over land instead of water.
They range from the absolutely egregious: saving money on fuel.
To the slightly less offensive but still nonetheless unacceptable: saving time on commercial and corporate flights.
To the plausible–only if the jets are being piloted by resident alcoholic, US Airways chief executive W. Douglas Parker (which very well might be the case): they’re just totally winging the whole thing, because “navigational charts…lack specificity on where pilots should turn.”
While we think it’s totally outrageous to think that Greenwich residents would make mountains out of molehills, there are some naysayers in the group, namely Thomas Cahill, the airport’s air traffic manager. “I think it’s more a perception than reality,” Cahill said. “I know the people who live in that area think the pilots are doing it intentionally.” Cahill also said some “complaints about wayward pilots [were] exaggerated.”
Obviously, the solution would be to force the planes to fly over Long Island, where, as one Greenwich resident put it, “they’re used to offensive and uncouth noises, whereas we’ve got eardrums that are a bit more refined, do you understand?” Unfortunately, such measures, while totally reasonable, might be a long way off. Which is why we’ve compiled a list of corporate jets that recently flew into Westchester County Airport, for the people of Greenwich’s perusal. We’re not saying you should throw rotten tomatoes at their passengers as they deplane. But we’re not saying you shouldn’t throw rotten tomatoes at their passengers as they deplane.
SAC: Brunswick Golden Isles to Westchester County, on its GV.
Blackstone: North Eleuthera to Westchester County, on its Raytheon Hawker 800.
Tudor Investment Corporation: Naples Municipal to Westchester County, on its Bombardier Global Express.
Citigroup: Ft. Lauderdale to Westchester County, on its GIV (Careful of Maria, that’s a new suit she’s wearing and you’ll be looking at the business end of a hissy fit if that stain doesn’t come out).
Cutting the corner: Westchester-bound jets take shortcut over town [Greenwich Time]