Thought about HBO’s new show about hedge funds (working title: Sextourage, although, in all seriousness, they should call it Arbitrage), lately? As in, are you going to watch it because there’s nothing else on but will hate yourself the whole time because it’ll probably be completely unrealistic and not know its longs from its shorts? (We did kind of like TBS’ first original series “Bull,” by the way, but only because we love when Donald Moffat plays evil characters). Now’s your chance to do something about it. The show’s creator, Doug Ellin, will be on BlogTalkRadio from 10-11 this morning (click here to listen) and would love for you to call in (347-677-0649) with some soft-ball questions. Don’t do that. Don’t play that game. Here are some starters, we know you can do better:
- Who are the following: Brian Hunter, Tom Hudson, Jim Chanos and Dan Loeb
- What are the following: Global Alpha, Amaranth, Fortress, Chapman, Third Point
- How many of your characters will be quants?
- Will they use the phrase “get it done?”
- Why not?
- Will the funds be long only, volatility-shorting, event-driven or multi-strategy?
- Who will be the token gerbil?
- Will any of the characters make love to a towel?
- Will underage girls be present?
- Why not?
- Will the fish picture be in one of the character’s offices?
- Whose daughter will drive the car into the swimming pool?
- Will you rip up real old-masters paintings?
- Why not?
- Who will play the SEC chairman?
- Not Sam Antar, former Crazy Eddie CEO and convicted felon?
- Why not?
- Do you read DealBreaker? (Ok, this might be self-serving for us, but do it anyway, yes?)
- Who is Muffie Benson-Perella?
- What is delta-gamma approximation?
- Ok, well then, what’s vega, smart-ass?
- No, NOT the star, you idiot. Did you hear a capital letter in my sentence?
- WRONG it is sensitivity to the IMPLIED volatility of the underlier. Sheesh.
- Will any of the funds use a 130/30 strategy?
- Why not?
- Will Michael Douglas make any appearances?
- Why not?
- How about a recurring crazy cab driver character who is constantly worried that a blow-up would drain his Greenwich to JFK high-revenue customers from…. hello? Hello?
Call (/listen) NOW!
Comments (24)
Leave a comment
You can log in with your account or comment as a guest below.
“No, NOT the star, you idiot. Did you hear a capital letter in my sentence?”
Every regular DB reader owes it to themselves to email HBO incessantly and demand that not only should a picture of the fish guy be on the wall of a character’s office, but (convicted felon) Sam E Antar play the head of the SEC.
I’m not the guy to organize this however. When the live-action Scooby Doo movie was announced, my email campaign to get Warner Bros to include Scooby saying the word “lesbians” on screen didn’t work.
“Rrrook Shaggy! Rrrresbians!” would have taken the movie up a notch, but no…
No. Wrong. Vega is an option price’s sensitivity to volatility of the underlying. Price sensitivity to implied volatility leads to a circular reference error.
i doubt ellin knows what delta-gamma approximation is.
is having sex with a towel making love or fucking?
can that even be summarized in one sentence? he probably knows them the other way around.
Ellin: “VEGA. The change in the option’s price for a 1% change in volatility.”
i’m on hold.
Muffie’s hot
brian hunter is a man who loves fish
his firm sleeps with the fishes.
post the podcast?
I swear you guys are like sci fi geeks at a star trek convention trying to quibble over fucking minutuia and technicalities. Ellin’s brother runs a pretty decent hedge fund so he’s not going to be totally clueless. Thank goodness it’s not a quant fund too because quants suck.
What’s a “pretty decent” hedge fund?
You’re right quants sucks. Enjoy your 1.5/15 fee structure, 200K comp and a 5 year old G4.
wOW can u buy a 5 year old G4 on that kind of salary?
anyway most of the quants i know have PHDs and pull down around a million base salary but also, none have their own jets so they must be spending it somewhere, presumably on battlestar galactica collectibles
The going rate for an 8 year old G4 is about $30 million. So, no, you can’t afford a G4 with a comp of 200k. Nor can you afford with a $1 million base, unless your bonus is orders of magnitude higher.
1. My original 200K/G4 comment was a rib at stinkee.
2. I didn’t mean he could buy a jet, I meant his fund’s NetJets. Who buys a jet outright for themselves anymore anyways?
3. The base comp is more like 500K. Bonus can be upwards of 1mm for us mid-tier guys. Top PMs can make a lot more.
@10:50 (the first one) – As always, it depends on whether you keep your shoes on or not.
i think its hilarious anyone with a salary that high even reads this site, carney must be shitting himself right now
Just because the funds you know overpay their wire rimmed pencil necked geek employees doesn’t mean that they are worth a damn. Their performance absolutely sucks ass without 2x, 3x leverage and even then they suck ass. You never hear about a long/short fund needing a bailout the way LTCM did. You never hear about a distressed fund blowing up in one month like Amaranth did in Nat gas. I could get into more lesser known quant trading funds but you get the idea. Their success is largely stochastic.
are we ragging on hedge funds for using leverage now?
its a basic function of all financial institutions. you think banks would lend at 1.5% ROE? or even be in business?
How was Brian Hunter’s bet quantitative exactly? The whole reason it blew is up is because they gave too much weight to one guy’s bets. The risk was not managed.
And if quant funds’ performance sucks ass how come they can pay their “geek” employees so much cash?
The reason LTCM needed a bailout is because it was fucking huge. The reason why you never hear about a L/S fund blowing up (and are you seriously telling us they don’t?) is because nobody gives a fuck anymore.
As long as Danny Devito does not play my part in any role, I am OK.
Respectfully,
Sam E. Antar (former Crazy Eddie CFO & convicted felon)
PS: It’s CFO and not CEO. Being a CEO means you are the biggest fish to catch.
As long as Danny Devito does not play my part in any role, I am OK.
Respectfully,
Sam E. Antar (former Crazy Eddie CFO & convicted felon)
PS: It’s CFO and not CEO. Being a CEO means you are the biggest fish to catch.