Barbarians at the Gate was a great read but who’s up for a new book by the voice of our generation? By a day trader so great he turned $12,415 in Bar Mitzvah money into a fully audited pre-tax sum of $1.65 million, a writer so wonderful he just might trump Mergers and Acquisitions in book sales? Anyone not vigorously shaking his/her yes is a liar and a fool. Yes, friends, hedge fund guru Tim Sykes has a book. Unfortunately, he doesn’t have a publisher other than himself. And master of his own publicity as he is, he needs a little help. So we’ll be excerpting his memoir, “An American Hedge Fund: How I Made $2 Million As A Stock Operator & Created A Hedge Fund” whenever the mood strikes us, and if you like it, you can buy it (in October), and if you don’t (and/or have some edits), you can email Tim at Tim at timothysykes dot com.
“My high school teammates loved my wins but were put off by my intensity. As a result I didn’t get captain; probably because they knew I’d work them as hard as I worked myself.”
“I hated Tufts University from the start. The weather seemed colder than Connecticut. The girls were overwhelmingly unattractive.”
“I was used to having my own space. Lots of it. I’d drawn a forced triple, which meant that I shared a room with two roommates instead of just one. The room was barely meant for two people, let alone three, so it was extremely tight and crowded. Early on, I banded together with one of my roommates whom I liked and we planned to irritate the third roommate into leaving. We toyed with him on a daily basis using such petty tricks as subscribing his email address to pornographic websites and spraying his sheets and pillows with Windex. After a few weeks, our operation succeeded and he moved out. My roommate and I celebrated our newfound space by throwing a party for the dorm.”
“During pledge week, a brother called asking me to bring him two dozen eggs immediately. Unfortunately, I couldn’t bring him the eggs because I was in the middle of a trade and told him so. Apparently, that was the wrong answer and I didn’t get in. I made $1,500 on the trade instead. My trading still came first and I was willing to sacrifice my social life for it.”
“My roommate and I...began playing the game “How much did Tim make today?” After class, he’d walk into our dorm room and blurt out several guesses. I wouldn’t answer until his guess was within a few thousand dollars of the correct answer…Once he guessed correctly, I liked to launch into speeches, providing all the glorious details of my trades. While I lectured, he’d sometimes nod his head in agreement, but I never really knew how much he understood.”
Posted by Jamie.BuchersGhost , Jun 29, 2007 12:18PM
Does any do any fact checking into this guys stories. Are we not sure that the OTHER 2 roomates were the ones who tortured SYKES every day till he moved out????
If it IS true we gotta find the guy who he "drove out" and make him aware of just how lucky he was to NOT have to live with this tool for a whole year.
Posted by , Jun 29, 2007 12:19PM
one more fing Tim Sykes posting and im not visiting this site anymore. that kids and fing dork.
Posted by End It , Jun 29, 2007 12:21PM
How long can a fully audited pre-tax sum of 1.65 million save someone from the realization that he is a douche bag?
Posted by LippyTex , Jun 29, 2007 12:25PM
If ever a man needed some of S.A.C.'s "personality flaw correcting" apparel, it's truly Mr. Sykes.
Posted by , Jun 29, 2007 12:25PM
Bess must be boning this guy because DB never stops writing about him. If this is Bess's new sugar daddy, doesn't it seem like a better idea to find a younger, better looking, as-capable version of Tim who hasn't made millions yet? I mean an up and comer likely wouldn't be as predisposed to a pre-nup as Sykes.
Posted by am i right or am i right , Jun 29, 2007 12:26PM
not a HF, only a PA
Posted by Idiot , Jun 29, 2007 12:31PM
12:25, Bess is NOT doing any of that w/ Sykes.
Posted by jt , Jun 29, 2007 12:32PM
is sykes still trading or did he blow is load on an apt and uses his "book advances" to live off?
Posted by , Jun 29, 2007 12:37PM
FOR THE LOVE OF GOD NO MORE!!!!
Posted by , Jun 29, 2007 12:40PM
Is Bess dating this guy? She has to be, there is no conceivable other reason to continue all these posts. And promoting his book? He must be really good in the sack.
Posted by Schwarzman , Jun 29, 2007 12:44PM
Please, no more of this guy.
Where are the posts about me?
Posted by mini ballerette. , Jun 29, 2007 12:46PM
can't be that hard to outsell Dana Vachon seeing as he only mustered 8000 in sales...probably half of which were given out for free at his book party
Posted by bess is not dating sykes , Jun 29, 2007 12:54PM
the conceivable reason for writing about this guy is that he's a fucking tool and tools are fun to laugh at!
Posted by bizwriter , Jun 29, 2007 12:57PM
well, posting this inane crap is a lot easier than doing real reporting that would inform a truly interesting piece on, say, jimmy cayne.
Posted by derve , Jun 29, 2007 1:03PM
He didn't get the pledge because he was too busy working a trade. Yeah, I'm sure that was the reason you didn't get in, Tim. Keep telling it that way!
Posted by , Jun 29, 2007 1:05PM
bizwriter wrote the jc piece
Posted by ZIm , Jun 29, 2007 1:06PM
sykes is paying for promo
Posted by Zbignew , Jun 29, 2007 1:11PM
"And master of his own publicity as he is, he needs a little help"
priceless
Posted by Third Roommate , Jun 29, 2007 1:28PM
New Sheets: $345
2 years of lab tests: $8,250.00
Avoiding all liquids in fear: -$45,980.00
Finding out just now it was only Windex: Priceless
Posted by , Jun 29, 2007 1:28PM
Douchebag
Posted by anon , Jun 29, 2007 2:30PM
*puke*
Posted by anon , Jun 29, 2007 2:33PM
Fellow readers, if you want DB to stop posting this crap then click as many ads as you can so that DB doesn't have to accept petty cash from Sykes.
In a related note, wasn't there some kind of recent legislation saying that bloggers have to disclose the fact that they're recieving bribes in exchange for promoting products?
Posted by , Jun 29, 2007 2:37PM
you people are retarded. it's fun to make fun of tim sykes. obviously, you do it every chance you get in the comments section of the posts about him. if you don't want posts about him-- and you obviously do, you can barely contain yourselves when they come up-- then don't make 50+ comment threads and drive up page views. say nothing. this obviously won't happen, though, since you love cutting other people down, sykes especially.
Posted by , Jun 29, 2007 2:39PM
Third Roommate, $345 for sheets for a college student? Quit posturing on an anonymous website douche bag.
Posted by anon , Jun 29, 2007 2:42PM
You are wrong Anonymous. The point of these 50+ comments is to convey to Bess Levin how much we really, really don't want any further information about Tim Sykes or his Bar Mitzva. Cutting down other people is fine when they're noteworthy individuals. But this isn't is fine, this is like making fun of people in the mailroom because they're not front office.
Posted by rob , Jun 29, 2007 2:44PM
but tim sykes loves it! and i-- and i'm not alone-- do too.
Posted by big T , Jun 29, 2007 3:01PM
ping-pong table?
are ya serious?
Posted by , Jun 29, 2007 3:39PM
This is a perverse business model Anon 2:37 if the point is to annoy your readers so much they feel they have to complain, just to drive page views
And anyway if Bess is actually making fun of Tim simply by posting excerpts from his book and suggesting we buy it, well the humor may be too tongue-in-cheek even for the DB readership
Posted by , Jun 29, 2007 3:40PM
the commentary was pretty clear cut
Posted by , Jun 29, 2007 3:40PM
levin is tongue-in-c, deal with it.
Posted by , Jun 29, 2007 3:43PM
it really makes this site look bad to let this loser post all over it.
Posted by , Jun 29, 2007 3:45PM
nah, it doesn't, and they havent' mentioned him in 2 weeks. high/low is what it's all about. go read dealbook.
Posted by , Jun 29, 2007 3:48PM
i fyou odn't like the sykes posts--and you do-- don't read them. or is there actually a cocked gun being held to your head?
Posted by , Jun 29, 2007 3:52PM
good one, sykes
Posted by , Jun 29, 2007 4:03PM
Timmy went to Tufts? His website says Tulane...
Posted by , Jun 29, 2007 4:10PM
that "levin is tongue-in-c" phrase should be good for another 30 horny comments on this post alone debating whether that is a euphemism for something dirty. thats what the readers really want.
oh, that and for sykes to be gone.
Posted by jt , Jun 29, 2007 4:30PM
I thoroughly enjoy the release from the drag of the daily routine that is sykes-bashing, dunno about everyone else.
actually would like to hear what he's currently doing (besides working on a "book")
Posted by , Jun 29, 2007 4:35PM
trading baby TRAY-DING
Posted by yadayada , Jun 29, 2007 10:07PM
Agree, stop writing about this loser, you put the site to a shame. Why would we 'finance professionals' care about some delusional college kid who thinks he is a HF mogul because he had a lucky shot.
Please write about some interesting HF/PE/Trader people who deserves their 15 minutes of fame.
Posted by anon , Jun 30, 2007 12:09AM
sykes is the rudy of the hedge fund world--let the kid tell his story!
Posted by STATESMEN , Jun 30, 2007 10:50PM
I checked, once the new roomate moved in. Tim accidently found evidence of roomate's past queer activity. Girly toruring stopped and Macho black mailing begins. No Body I say, No Body fuxxks with Tim Sykes. He moved out within a month, sick and tired of the non-sense.
Posted by STATESMEN , Jun 30, 2007 10:53PM
I checked, once the new roomate moved in. Tim accidently found evidence of roomate's past queer activity. Hence the black mailing begins. No Body I say, No Body fuxxks with Tim Sykes. He moved out within a month, sick and tired of the non-sense.
Posted by STATESMEN , Jun 30, 2007 11:19PM
Once the new roomate moved in. Tim accidently found evidence of roomate's queer activity laying around. Girly torturing stopped and Macho black mailing begins. No Body I say, No Body fuxxks with Tim Sykes. He moved out within a month, it was like living with a bitch. Just another normal day in the life of Tim Sykes. =)
Posted by Statesmen , Jun 30, 2007 11:48PM
Sykes is not just a Lucky shot . He proved himself numerous times already. Just reloading bullets, for the next round.
Posted by STATESMEN , Jun 30, 2007 11:52PM
Is "StopTrading" scared of a little competition. Or are they just resting for the next season??
Posted by Statesmen , Jun 30, 2007 11:56PM
sorry for all the versions above, first time posting.
Posted by statesmen , Jul 01, 2007 12:05AM
final note, I do think Levin is cute.
Posted by statesmen , Jul 01, 2007 12:19AM
btw, where are hell you ppl getting all this shit about Sykes? Apparently, I heard they are either way too sensitive or totally out of this universe. Never are they accurate. I do read this for entertainment but I have to say your source about Sykes always had been shit.
Posted by sykes_christmas_past , Jul 01, 2007 3:47PM
DB's source is ok, but sources from all you other ppl are just way up in the antarctic most of the time.
Posted by , Jul 01, 2007 4:28PM
The guy hasn't made money in 5+ years. His "hedge fund" (LOL) has returned a paltry 1.5 % over the last 4+ years.
His story can be summed up in one sentence...
"College kid rides technology bubble to great profits, and spends the rest of his life trying to make money off of it."
Posted by anonymous , Jul 01, 2007 10:38PM
everybody should go to the ET board for this book--its getting craaazy
Posted by , Aug 13, 2007 2:57PM
Cilantro/Sykes Fund Audited Performance SUCKS BIG TIME!! (3/2003-6/2007):
Compounded Annual Return: 1.52% (underperformed money market rates, with much higher risk)
Cilantro/Sykes Fund Sharpe Ratio (Annualized): -0.06
(may as well bet on coin flips; or do as Tim Sykes and sell out and go on TV/self-publish etc)
STAY AWAY from Tim if you want to keep your money!!
Posted by , Aug 13, 2007 2:58PM
Cilantro/Sykes Fund Audited Performance SUCKS BIG TIME!! (3/2003-6/2007):
Compounded Annual Return: 1.52% (underperformed money market rates, with much higher risk)
Cilantro/Sykes Fund Sharpe Ratio (Annualized): -0.06
(may as well bet on coin flips; or do as Tim Sykes and sell out and go on TV/self-publish etc)
STAY AWAY from Tim if you want to keep your money!!
Posted by , Aug 13, 2007 3:59PM
TIMMAY is such a joke... posting on ET during market hours... underperfoming money markets... yeah taking $20k or whatever to a mill + is an accomplishment I guess, but back then the markets were giving out free cash money by the bundle. You could recognize buyers and sellers back then Timmy, good job. Right now, though, the market is giving out free cash money too with this volatility - but Timmy is too busy defending his book on ET to be noticing it and trading the volatility. That's probably because he sucks too much to make any $$$ from the free gifts being given to us daytraders daily by the blessing of institutional panic.
Timmy you're in my book not a trader, so kindly shut the fuck up and get off this forum as you're a snake oil salesman. You have nothing worth writing about, no one cares about your failed experiences, why you were trying to run clients money into pink sheets, etc. You're lame, go away and get a life please. Thank you.
Posted by , Aug 13, 2007 4:36PM
He may not be much of a trader...but I will never forget the day he was on CNBC...after we got done taping he took me into the CNBC Men's room and showed me a whole new world in the bathroom stall. My legs are still quivering.
Posted by: Bob Pisani | August 13, 2007 04:07 PM
Posted by twenty something , Aug 13, 2007 6:16PM
Timmay where the F are you? We need to talk about some HIV test results; and our big day in Vermont...
twenty something
http://a696.ac-images.myspacecdn.com/images01/23/s_3ecb5a2bd9f7cfbaabca2c06d1e0efe7.jpg
Posted by kaplan accounting , Aug 13, 2007 9:31PM
Do Not Let Tim NEAR your MONEY!!
Cilantro/Sykes Fund Audited Performance SUCKS BIG TIME (3/2003-6/2007):
Compounded Annual Return: 1.52% (underperformed money market rates, with much higher risk; better to buy CD's than lose with Tim)
Cilantro/Sykes Fund Sharpe Ratio (Annualized): -0.06
(may as well bet on coin flips; or do as Tim Sykes and sell out and go on TV/self-publish etc)
BEWARE: SYKES SUCKS(in many ways)!!
Posted by Timmy is bad , Aug 27, 2007 8:41PM
UPDATE--
Audited Cilantro/Sykes "hedge fund" performance:
2007 YTDJan-Jul: -10.26%
2006 Return: -25.83%
Jan2006-Jul2007: -36.06%
Down 36% in the last 19 months!!!!
Posted by Sykes is a liar , Sep 02, 2007 6:19PM
Here is Timmy's book in a nutshell.
1) Timmy made money trading the NASDAQ bubble (along with everyone else).
2) Timmy has not made money trading in the last 5 years.
3) Timmy is trying to make money off his '99-'01 track record, while lying about his trading failures over the last 5 years.
There, I saved you the $20 book fee.
Posted by Bob Cohen , Sep 03, 2007 1:00PM
"Lucky Idiot/Sykes has his Luck Run-Out"
I've read the advance copy of Sykes "book". DO NOT BUY THAT SNAKE OIL CRAP unless you like seeing a hyper idiot self-destruct......
Nothing of value in this book for any serious professional....
His "Fund" is down over -36% since Jan2006.
Posted by , Sep 07, 2007 11:26PM
fuck u timmay haters, this kid has done more with his life than all of you (probly one pimple faced kid and his imaginary friends) combined
Posted by Dave Webb , Sep 14, 2007 1:00PM
I also read Sykes book and was psyched when I started, but was quite disappointed by the time I got done. Nothing really new or earth shattering in it. It was boring and meaningless.....
I wouldnt recommend paying $20 for it. Much better "reads" out there.
People should know that Sykes/Cilantro "Hedge Fund" is DOWN -36% since Jan2006; and Tim is not regarded as a very good trader or writer.
Posted by , Sep 18, 2007 6:39AM
Just read that sykes hedge fund book and found it a complete waste of time. Sykes is so delusional, he can't believe that after reading his book people are unimpressed.
Sykes is going nuts, posting insults at Amazon directed to his readers comments if they did not like the book!!
He is worried that he might need to find a real job since selling books won't pay his rent!!