Wall Street is a place of legendary stress. And legendary techniques for stress relief. Jim Cramer was once famous for smashing computer key boards. John Mack used to pulverize telephones. We once had an M&A bigshot throw an entire telephone console at us. There are therapists who specialize in dealing with the stresses of life in finance.
And, of course, there are drugs. Lots of drugs. New York City is famously awash in drugs these days. In fact, just the other day a journalist asked us to put her in touch with “Wall Street types who smoke a lot of pot.” We don’t know exactly how to take the assumption that we know about these things but we couldn’t help her anyway. Most of the folks we know prefer their recreation in other forms.
According to an article in the newly businessy BusinessWeek, the use of hard drugs is greatly diminished from the days of yore. And it’s all the fault of Wharton. Or something.
While Wall Street still has its rough edges, the culture is far more straitlaced today than in past eras. “It’s more institutionalized,” says one hedge fund manager. It’s no longer acceptable to deal with your stress by hurling a computer on the floor or by indulging in drink, drugs, or alcohol. As a practical matter, the threat of a lawsuit is much higher than before. And traders are generally a more professional group than in past decades. “There weren’t as many Wharton MBAs on the scene during the 80s,” says the fund manager, who spoke on condition that he not be identified.
Today, when drugs are employed against stress, they’re more likely to be the prescription variety. Another hedge fund manager, speaking on condition of anonymity, says he has been taking antidepressants for years. While his work didn’t cause his depression, it can exacerbate it. That can lead to a modification in medication or work habits. He once even closed a particularly troublesome fund at the urging of his wife, who said it was leading to severe stress that was affecting his behavior and disrupting their marriage.
There certainly are a lot more people in finance putting on the Ritz and taking the A-Train—that is, taking Ritalin and Adderall—than there were in the days before the little pills that could were invented. But is usage of the hard stuff really down as far as the article claims? If so, then Wall Street must have been under a permanent blizzard in those days.
Gives new meaning to the idea of not trusting anyone over forty. They’re probably a drug addict.
Stressed Out on Wall Street [Business Week]
What’s Wall St coming to when you can’t have 2-3 martinis at lunch and do a ton of blow at happy hour?
Where’s the investigative journalism that probes the hyper-aggressive A-type personalities who are leathered and collared subs after-hours or who are cuckolds because their stress level has affected their physiology so much that even a freighter of Vitamin V couldn’t help?
i am in the trenches and it’s pretty much everywhere still don’t worry.
ah, just living the dream on Wall St…impotent at 49 and 1.5 hr commute back to the Island every day
dear anon,
with an 1.5 hour commute, shouldnt you just stay in town? I mean the babes in Manhattan are easier and more fun mrs anon, right?
Studies show that these Wharton MBA’s types no longer indulge in drugs and alcoholic beverages but rather making personal websites about what C-list movies that they have appeared in as stand-ins, and responding to personal ads on Match.com.
and give up the 1.5 acre palace for the missus, nathan and brittany? never.
Yes, while the old timers waste their time partying, drinking and getting laid, the Wharton MBAs focus on work. Sounds fine to me.
@ happy on wall…
what does an impotent guy care if the girls are easy? that’s like taking an anorexic to the pastry counter at blathazar and showing her the goods.
at scores on saturday i was blowing rails with a stripper before barebacking her in the champagne room
gross
Looks like the CraigsList chick found a date.
Mazel tov, can’t buy me love @ 3:54 pm.
link?
granted, may not have been the smartest decision, but i don’t always see straight when i’m snowblind. wasn’t cheap, but then again, not working on the street to save money
It is no secret that most of the men that work on wall street these days are closet fags who dress like they are Metro pretending to be Gordon Gekko. But when they get home after a night of debauchery what they really want is some big black man meat. Hillary in 08.
can’t buy love – hey at least you weren’t smoking cigarettes because as we all know that is the real evil in this city.
and you have a great story (can we all agree that we are sick of reading how some of th best traders on the street play a mean game of chess). bareback may have been somewhat agressive, but good luck with getting the all clear.
can’t buy love – I feel you, did something similar a few weeks back, still haven’t heard the a-ok from the Dr but no worries bro its all good, er, i hope…er, i mean, uh
@can’t buy love
There is definitely sex in the champagne room. The distinction between stripper and whore is tenuous at best. What’re the odds you picked up AIDS, do you think?
anyone know how long it takes for something to show up? my girl gets back on friday from visiting her parents in denver
@ can’t buy love
does your girl know that she is strictly a rental with no lease to own option? cuz if not, now might be the time to tell her. then it won’t really matter how long it takes for something to show up.
problem solved.
Thats why you never have sex with a woman, Man on man is the cleanist sex there is. No one get STDs from man on man. I am a power bottom.
i’d say odds on the hiv are pretty low since this was strictly vag. clearly not the smartest thing to do, but the horse has left the barn at this point
Welcome to the ‘waiting period’ brohamster. Dr. told me it takes a few weeks for some stuff to show up, so just make sure to check your junk in the meantime. Seems as if you don’t pick up anything relatively minor, chances are (again relatively) pretty good that you didn’t get something major.
In the words of the late, great Van Wilder, “don’t be a fool, wrap your tool, especially with strippers and whooass [sic]“
Gotta wait at least (!) six weeks before tests can detect HIV. Worst thing to do is to go a few days after the acc… incident and feel reliefed once the results are in.
@ can’t buy love
its all about the bench mark. you should take some comfort in the fact that the
the snow storm is a minor detail in the “bareback story”.
and the moral of the story…. at least you didn’t have a cigarette.
Aha, the real truth comes out. There was a horse in the champagne room at Scores!
well then i’m fucked cuz its gonna be damn near impossible to have an excuse for wearing a rubber again when she gets back
who under the age of 60 calls it a “rubber”?
just tell her you saw some bumps on your ish, and that you’re 99.9999% sure its a rash from shaving dry with dull mach 3, and you just want to be 100% sure because you love her, obviously
@ can’t buy love
Yeah well all vag has the added benefit of you not riding the real A-Train straight to Hedes.
But what’re the chances a baby is going to show up on your next AmEx statement?
Anyway I had my adventure a while back… and never got tested. I figured if it was anything that could get cured it would show up on its own and if it wasn’t anything that could be cured then I really don’t want to know. Of course, syphilis is always an issue.
@ been there done that
you work for the cheney/bush adminstration don’t you?
@ been there done that
you work for the cheney/bush adminstration don’t you?
this is some seriously enlightening commentary
@ Anon 5:22, i know you probably think girls will believe anything, but no one gets tasted for razor burn
I started up the ladder of success by being a retail rep for a regional gasoline chain in the late 1970s. (Oh, and I still call them rubbers. Condoms, not the company I worked for.)
Anyway, I met the guy who sold all the rubbers and novelties in service station bathrooms between Oklahoma and Canada. He also sold a novelty item called “Instant Pussy”. For 25 cents you spun the wheel on the rubber/novelty cabinet in the dirty men’s room and out popped what looked like a little cardboard rubber packet but in it was the “Instant Pussy”. Lurid descriptions were written on the wrapper as well as instructions. You opened the packet and there was a clear capsule with what looked like a sponge in it. You put it in a glass of water and the capsule disolved and the sponge expanded into the shape of…..a cat! Ha ha ha.
The rubes bought shitloads of those things. The salesman made a great living. Fast-forward to present time and I was describing the “Instant Pussy” novelty to one of our credit analysts and she cracked everyone up when she asked, “Wouldn’t it be too small?”. You can still get the product in some fine bathrooms near Gackle, ND, I am told.
only ~1 in 500 if you know she has aids, ~1 in 200,000 assuming she is just a random member of the US pop. (unprotected)
enough with the aids talk….straight, non drug using dudes dont get it unless you’re mashing bitches dinner raw dog.
i’ve been hooking up with random filthys at the strip clubs and the full service clubs since day i arrived in the city 6 years ago and only thing ive ever caught was a cold.
how can i convince my doc i need adderall?
Drugs? Sex? Wall St? everyone knows that now all we need is a relaxing vacation in Germany to dance our cares away…
http://my.break.com/content/view.aspx?ContentID=371680
RE: how to convince doc to prescribe Addies
Do not tell her that you tried some of your friend’s pills in college and you liked it. If you weren’t prescribed it before, maybe say your brother had it prescribed to him and it helped him focus. Otherwise, shop around, different docs have different opinions.
Definitely tell your doctor that your job involves spending long hours concentrating on very detailed tasks and that you are having trouble staying focussed. Mention that you are afraid your work is suffering and that you are worried your bosses will notice. Do not indicate that you have a drug already in mind. If you don’t get a prescription for adderall, you have a doctor who is irrationally phobic of drugs or thinks you have already exhibited “drug seeking” behavior. Time to change docs.
@ been there, done that:
that’s why i’m strictly a cash guy bro. used a fake name, no plastic. the odds of this ukrainian (or whatever ex-soviet she was) puttana finding me in manhattan are about 1.5mm-1, so i’ll take my chances.
A day late but:
“…Charlie Santaularia, 24, a managing director at Parrot Trading Partners, a $12 million hedge fund with offices in Denver and Lawrence, Kan…”
I’m sorry, is BW really quoting a guy with a $12 mm fund?
rY3erI Awesome article post. Really Great.