JPMorgan Appoints Risk Manager, Citigroup Asks, "What's A Risk Manager?"

Posted by Barry, Nov 26, 2007 3:19PM

Oh, those are balls.

Posted by nonfinancial comment, Nov 26, 2007 3:34PM

He looks like a magician.

Posted by anon anon anon, Nov 26, 2007 3:36PM

A risk manager carries swimming trunks for skinny dipping CEOs in case the tide goes out.

Posted by Some Jewish Guy, Nov 26, 2007 3:52PM

Hey, did any see the story about that Saudi woman who was raped and then sentenced to being beaten for her crimes. I was so wrong about the arabs; they really are civilized and not animals or terrorists at all!!

and they respect women's rights and NEVER smell bad or hump camels!!!

Posted by The Man Who Knows "Funny", Nov 26, 2007 3:53PM

Excellent post "anon anon anon @ 3:36" !!! Should be required reading in the "C suite".

Posted by Shit for Brains, Nov 26, 2007 3:55PM

Only my favorite colloquialism of all time.

Posted by HAM'05, Nov 26, 2007 3:58PM

the prince is now my facebook picture

also - my firm blocked access a few days ago to fbook's inbox - bastards.

on another note, bess, interest you in a post-work drink at the campbell apt to discuss black napoleon, the citadelle, etc?

Posted by , Nov 26, 2007 4:02PM

HAM'05: the l. campbell apt?

Posted by mer lets us check fb, Nov 26, 2007 4:04PM

HAM, you workin at bear?

Posted by , Nov 26, 2007 4:06PM

HAM'05 may work at Barclays. HA HA! YOU WORK AT BARCLAYS!

Posted by , Nov 26, 2007 4:09PM

says the dude working at barclays

Posted by , Nov 26, 2007 4:14PM

says the dude working at wachovia

Posted by 56, Nov 26, 2007 4:15PM

Dicks for Chicks?
Ah, to be a headline writer at the New York Post tomorrow:
Dicks Sporting-DKS agrees to acquire Chick's Sporting Goods
Dick's Sporting Goods, Inc. and Chick's Sporting Goods, a privately held corporation, have entered into a definitive stock purchase agreement whereby Dick's will acquire Chick's Sporting Goods. Under the terms of the agreement, Dick's has agreed to pay approximately $40 million in cash for the outstanding equity of Chick's. Including the assumption of approximately $31 million of indebtedness, the transaction values Chick's at approximately $71 million, and will be financed using Dick's existing credit facility. Chick's shareholders have the opportunity to earn up to $5 million in additional consideration, upon satisfaction by Chick's of certain specified performance criteria through June, 2008.

Posted by , Nov 26, 2007 4:25PM

YOU should be the lawyer!

Posted by HAM'05, Nov 26, 2007 4:27PM

wachovia retail, woop woop

but seriously, they didnt even block access to the entire site, just the inbox so i can see that i have messages (from bess) but can't respond. infuriating.

4:02 if that was a quip i dont get it

Posted by , Nov 26, 2007 4:31PM

HAM: you said "the campbell apt." i was asking if you meant lindsay campbell's apt. but wait, are you really in retail at wachovia? and does bess know?

Posted by HAM'05, Nov 26, 2007 4:42PM

ah THAT lindsay campbell - nah dude, if i knew where she lived i wouldnt be here right now. financial news reporters are hottt (3 t's count em)

Posted by , Nov 26, 2007 4:45PM

you went from Harvard Asset Management to Wachovia Retail?

Posted by no thanks, Nov 26, 2007 4:46PM

lindsay campbell is pushing 40.

Posted by , Nov 26, 2007 4:50PM

i think HAM means hamilton?

Posted by , Nov 26, 2007 4:55PM

HAM 05 know his haiti shit. I hadda go googlin. Smart boy which is always sexy. Go for it bess.

The Black Napoleon: Toussaint L'Ouverture Liberator of Haiti

The Citadelle, built by King Henri Christophe at the beginning of the 19th century to defend against invaders, is the largest fortress in the Western Hemisphere. It is Haiti's most revered national symbol -- of brilliance in its building but of cruelty in the forced labor that cost up to 20,000 lives.

Posted by Barry Zuckercorn, Nov 26, 2007 5:25PM

Finally, an allusion (illusion?) worthy enough of my return.

Posted by HAM'05 is my sworn enemy, Nov 26, 2007 5:29PM

4:55 is right. bess like's smart boys, HAM is undoubtedly getting her hot.

Posted by , Nov 26, 2007 5:36PM

For the rest of us, a liberal arts education is what we acquire in our leisure time.

Posted by a serious question, Nov 26, 2007 5:38PM

"For the rest of us, a liberal arts education is what we acquire in our leisure time."

What does that even mean?

Posted by , Nov 26, 2007 5:45PM

5:38: I would say he's implyin that boys that make a livin puttin numbers in boxes never had the time to learn the liberal arts (which might include gaining some knowledge of haitian history). And, by implication, that bess shouldnt be so easily swayed. My take is that anyone can put numbers in boxes. It the HAM05 types that are rare.

Posted by you can't be sirius, Nov 26, 2007 5:45PM

...it means we do some bougie bullshit for 50 hours a week so we can haul in 7 figures which affords us the ability to pursue higher minded shit when not at the office.

Posted by easily swaying is my way of saying fucking, Nov 26, 2007 5:50PM

5:45 what makes you so sure HAM'05 is easily swaying bess?

Posted by Plastic Fantastic, Nov 26, 2007 5:55PM

He should really get that removed.

Posted by Anal_yst, Nov 26, 2007 6:00PM

50 hours/week? Back office puts in more than that, although if you're pulling 7 figures (doubtful) in that time good for you (liar).

Also yes, liberal arts education is what you do in your spare time.

Posted by , Nov 26, 2007 6:06PM

HAM'05: will you be able to nail bess before AJ?

Posted by 5:45, Nov 26, 2007 7:01PM

analyst....
my name's on the building (it's a small building)... go jerk off an MD, peon.

Posted by , Nov 26, 2007 8:55PM

cant understand why you boys r so anti liberal arts. any small dicked U Delaware frat boy fi-nance major can recite that there's an inverse realtionship between price and yield. What he cant do though is reason and connect the dots. Thats why the liberal arts people get the good jobs. And spend just the first three months of their career learning that little bit of finance knowledge that it took mr. blue hen four years to absorb.

Posted by , Nov 26, 2007 9:08PM

do any of the rabid Bess fans here realize she went to a liberal arts school? at least i can rest my head at night knowing that when i talk/fantasize about her hot tits i'm doing so without having denigrating the girl's education.

Posted by voice of reason, Nov 26, 2007 9:28PM

well put, 9:08.

Posted by , Nov 26, 2007 10:32PM

HAM'05 is my sworn enemy: If smart boys get Bess hot, how do you explain how she went out with that dildo Sykes?

Also all this talk about Bess calls for a picture. C'mon, throw us a bone here.

Posted by idiots, Nov 26, 2007 10:36PM

Bess never went out with Sykes, you fucking morons. Ever think that she does the posts about him because he's an easy target and sometimes it's a slow news day?

Posted by girl2, Nov 26, 2007 10:43PM

it's so hilarious that the DB readership finds the fact that a girl doesn't want to date an idiot to be a foreign concept.

Posted by , Nov 26, 2007 10:59PM

What women want to date is a very slight hint of gay: organized, goal oriented, well dressed, decent apartment, good pecs, nice fingernails and toenails, good haircut. But not anh of that in an obsessive way. Which would be gay.

Posted by Anal_yst, Nov 27, 2007 12:52AM

@ 5:45

Maybe it is you sir that fail to connect your precious dots.

Did ya think for a second, maybe, that its possible to major in Finance AND take classes outside that major? Maybe somewhere buried deep in 150 some-odd credits, some of us might have squeezed in close to, if not just as many lib arts or other classes as those who chose not to study any remotely-practical area in depth?

Of course we're also not even scratching the surface here, I mean come one clearly no banker/trader/etc does or ever has done anything outside of Finance, no, of course not, lets not be silly and kid ourselves here...

Assclown.