I haven't worked at a bank for about fifteen years so I don't know if this is standard and I'm just out of the loop but someone told me recently about Morgan Stanley's felony prevention program and I sort of love it. Apparently, in light of the number of finance professionals who have openly admitted to being down with insider trading and the proliferation of groups to support this very cause (not like "let us help you with your insider trading problem" but more "so you want to insider trade? here's how"), Morgan Stanley has created a program where they bring in felons to talk to prospective felons (these being MS employees) about how they once committed felonies AND IT RUINED THEIR LIVES. It's all very "Oh, you thinking about smoking some crack? Maybe just a little in the men's room, take the edge off the morning? WELL DON'T BECAUSE I DID IT AND LOOK AT ME NOW! THAT ONE HIT FUCKED EVERYTHING UP. NOW I CAN'T EVEN GET A JOB AT CITIGROUP."
But the one thing we wonder is: yes, this whole thing seems like it would be hilarious to watch and we definitely wouldn't turn down an invite to observe the next one taking place, but does it work? Afterwards, are the MS boys and girls all, "Wow, that scared the shit out of me, I will never do anything illegal (again)"? or more, "Yeah, you went to jail but look at this awesome gig you've got now. This is the sort of speaking tour Tim Sykes would kill for, and, I have to say, so would I"? That's an actual question to those of you contemplating insider trading right now. (The other is, to the LEH readers out there, does Lehman have a similar program? Doesn't it seem like something that would be right up Dick Fuld's alley? Can't you see him leaving important meetings early to take part in the sessions just so he can violently get in his employees' faces and maybe throw one or two up against the wall under the guise of "getting into character"? And if the answer's no, would you consider suggesting it, and letting me watch?)
Posted by , Nov 21, 2007 11:14AM
so awesome