In spite of atrocious performances from Global Alpha and GEO, which perhaps might be indicators of Goldman’s inability to do anything but suck ass when it comes to hedge funds, the firm’s latest HF venture is starting out with a record-setting $10 billion, of which it is expected to lose at least 40 percent, taking redemptions and unforseen weather patterns into account, by the end of ’08. According to Bloomberg, GSIP, run by Raanan Agus and Kenneth Eberts, is (wisely) treading on the Goldman name and standard of excellence, as if to say, “Hey look, we’re not so bad,” past performances of existing hedge funds presumably not being taken into account, though you never know (could be good for demonstrating that GS is human and capable of failure. So, so, so much failure.) The best part is that GSIP has actually calculated– calculated– that if the current fund, in an imaginary world where time travel existed, had been around since the beginning of ’04, it would have returned 18 percent each year through August 2007, beating the S&P 500′s 10 percent average. Keep in mind this is all just hearsay and speculation, and that it’s entirely possible that the same fund, had it existed since the beginning of ’04, could have just as easily returned 79 percent each of those years.
Anyway. I think we all know what time it is:
Goldman May Break Record for a New Hedge Fund With $10 Billion [Bloomberg]
Support 2 live crew, and buy LKEN
Me so….
great use of hearsay and speculation.
What’s with all these disturbing images on this site today. There’s this guy in the buy Goldman video. There’s the gross fake Jim Cayne video. And there is the very, very disturbing NSFW picture of Henry Paulson and the bird.
Slim, how hard were you when you came up with that comment, no pun intended?
You’re a glutton for punishment, aren’t you Slim?
Carney this shit sucks can’t you steal some software from gawker or something instead of this triple post crap
Someone’s been retroactively deleting comments…
hello anal_yst, they’re deleting slims.
“The best part is that GSIP has actually calculated– calculated– that if the current fund, in an imaginary world where time travel existed, had been around since the beginning of ’04, it would have returned 18 percent each year through August 2007″
GSIP was previously part of the prop. trading (principal strategies) group. They did the same job, with the only difference that they only had one investor: Goldman Sachs capital. So of course they can CALCULATE (yes, calculate) what their returns were since 2004. Don’t see what the problem is.
“The best part is that GSIP has actually calculated– calculated– that if the current fund, in an imaginary world where time travel existed, had been around since the beginning of ’04, it would have returned 18 percent each year through August 2007″
GSIP was previously part of the prop. trading (principal strategies) group. They did the same job, with the only difference that they only had one investor: Goldman Sachs capital. So of course they can CALCULATE (yes, calculate) what their returns were since 2004. Don’t see what the problem is.
it’s a joke kazza.
“The best part is that GSIP has actually calculated– calculated– that if the current fund, in an imaginary world where time travel existed, had been around since the beginning of ’04, it would have returned 18 percent each year through August 2007″
GSIP was previously part of the prop. trading (principal strategies) group. They did the same job, with the only difference that they only had one investor: Goldman Sachs capital. So of course they can CALCULATE (yes, calculate) what their returns were since 2004. Don’t see what the problem is.
No, what is a joke?
I work at Goldman. We don’t do jokes, we make money.
kazza, if I became an investor in GSIP in, let’s say 2007, why.t.f. would I care what the returns would’ve been since 2004 if I wasn’t in it then? The problem is that GS is insulated and its employees are so oblivious to what people are saying about this whole debacle. And just so you know, that wasn’t a joke. No go run along and finish changing the font on the cover of your pitch book to Georgia, regular, 11 pt., gray before your VP comes along and makes you do that thing he likes in the bathroom when no one is around.
kazza, if I became an investor in GSIP in, let’s say 2007, why.t.f. would I care what the returns would’ve been since 2004 if I wasn’t in it then? (This *could be* a joke if I did care.) The problem is that GS has insulated itself and its employees are so oblivious to what people are saying about this whole debacle. (This *isn’t* a joke.) No go run along and finish changing the font on the cover of your pitch book to Georgia, regular, 11 pt., gray before your VP comes along and makes you do that thing he likes in the bathroom when no one is around. (You wish this was a joke. See – you’re getting the hang of it!)
The prop returns with the HF fees did 17 in 04, 19.5 in 05, 17 in 06 and 13 in 07 as of August… which does kind of put them at 18 annualized. And gee, I wonder why anyone would want to see historical returns to mull over a prospective investment… hmmmm, oh, and they launched in 08 riddle. These are ex-GS Prop, which off the bat makes them some of the most desired HF managers in the world… i.e. Eddie Lampert, TPG-Axon, Eton Park, and David Fuckin Tepper to name a few. They should be ok.