Lehman Level 3 Assets Climb

Posted by slimjim, Dec 13, 2007 12:53PM

What is a level 3 Jew? One that celebrates Hanukkah but does not hate Jesus? But seriously what is going on at Lehman is that the Jews have decided that instead of giving a christmas oops i mean holiday bonus they will give a jelly of the month club to all the workers. Happy Holidays!

Posted by , Dec 13, 2007 12:57PM

If they had any prop assets that were once public and are now private (i have no clue what lehman has for assets), that could make them transfer to 3. That, or an increase in PE investments which can't be readily valued.

Posted by humble question, Dec 13, 2007 1:00PM

Slimjim, be careful on the way home. With your white sheets, you're going to blend right in with the snow.. .

Posted by slimjim, Dec 13, 2007 1:14PM

Thank you for your concern but i will be on the subway with all the Upper West Side faggots, i don't need a white sheet to stand out. I am the one straight guy in a crowd of homos.

Posted by Anal_yst, Dec 13, 2007 1:18PM

I haven't read through in info yet, but dare I suggest perhaps this is (very small example of) selling assets that were in L2/L3 to raise funds vs. L3 assets...I mean its not a very large increase, if it'd gone from 12% to 20%, then there'd probably be something fishy, like slimjim's sexuality

Posted by Dick, Dec 13, 2007 1:22PM

Aren't Lehman bonus numbers being given out today? What's the scoop?

Posted by 1-2, Dec 13, 2007 1:36PM

Anal_yst, where you been all my life (er, the past few days).

Thanks for finally injecting some sanity into today's conversations.

I'm still waiting for someone to say "but Anal_yst, since 12 and 13% are nominally small it's an 8.33% increase. Isnt that big?" To which i will respond by slapping him in the face with my cock.

But slimjim, you stay the fuck away from mine. Bess knows that she's mine and i'm hers and that's that.

Posted by A-Non, Dec 13, 2007 1:37PM

slimjim, you seem a little bitter. Posting from you living room while collecting unemployment and searching Monster.com?

Posted by A-Non, Dec 13, 2007 1:38PM

slimjim, you seem a little bitter. Posting from you living room while collecting unemployment and searching Monster.com?

Posted by dick fuld's daddy, Dec 13, 2007 1:38PM

LEH should have tanked today, who the fuck believes what they are saying...they have huge mortgage exposure, right?

Posted by slimjim, Dec 13, 2007 1:43PM

I wish i was at home collecting unemployment but one again my skin color does not allow me to be a leech on society.

Posted by 1-2, Dec 13, 2007 1:46PM

A-Non, nah, it's just that SlimJim is wondering why the Mitchell Commission didn't investigate him. I mean, don't the years of 'roid rage show the ladies he's straight? Really, how could he take so many steriods and still be considered gay? It totally should've worked, right? I mean, it's not like there are any large, roided gay guys, right? Right?

Wrong. You're gay.

However, i have no legitimate explanation for my own aggression today. Maybe it's the fact SlimJim's an anti-semite. Maybe it's the fact i'm dumbfounded by the fact people in banking (or reading dealbreaker) are pissed at him making anti-semetic jokes. Maybe, just maybe, it's because i'm outta this joint. Who knows?

Posted by bess-less, Dec 13, 2007 1:48PM

where is BL today?

Posted by One synapse clapping, Dec 13, 2007 1:48PM

You might have to repeat that 1-2 in case slimjim was distracted snapping into some UWS faggot cock. and no slim, closing your eyes doesn't make you straight.

Posted by slimjim, Dec 13, 2007 1:51PM

The Mitchell report will make today a sad day in baseball. That is nothing to joke about.

Posted by Anonymous, Dec 13, 2007 1:53PM

LEH's book value is bogus. That's what it means.

Posted by One synapse clapping, Dec 13, 2007 1:57PM

slimjim: the only UWS straight man that goes balls deep.

Posted by , Dec 13, 2007 2:00PM

where is keith today? can he sub for bess when she isnt in?

Posted by 1-2, Dec 13, 2007 2:01PM

One Synapse, love the name.

Mitchell Report is a great allegory to the subprime crisis:

Everyone knew something fishy was going on, and everyone let it happen. Today is mearly the August turmoil: a formal recognition.

Posted by slimjim, Dec 13, 2007 2:02PM

That is correct i go balls deep into your mother. She is a size queen.

Posted by , Dec 13, 2007 2:02PM

A day without Bess is like Christmas without the TSO.

Posted by , Dec 13, 2007 2:05PM

A day without bess like chanukah without the menorah

Posted by , Dec 13, 2007 2:13PM

slimjim did you wake up this morning and drink a tall, cool glass of Haterade?

Posted by Tiger, Dec 13, 2007 2:15PM

He probably contracted syphilis from some twink he barebacked on the downlow

Posted by , Dec 13, 2007 2:21PM

slim: sizequeen another esoteric gay reference. You never fail to impress. Straight boys just dont talk that way. Where do you learn these things? Unless....

Posted by slimjim, Dec 13, 2007 2:22PM

A day without Bess is like a day without UWS cock.

Posted by , Dec 13, 2007 2:24PM

slimjim was probably abused by all his family when he was a child and left in a corner of the room afterwards. Hence it is no surprise that he is so attention seeking. He has all the marks of freaks who walk into malls shooting people. And a loser too - just think, do you know of anyone who works at a half decent bank and has the time to post every 5 minutes?

You people are feeding his attention hogging attempts. People like these melt away if you ignore them. Let him post crap. Just ignore. He will get tired and move somewhere else.

Posted by Kim Jong, Dec 13, 2007 2:27PM

I am so ronery. So sadry arone. No one pays attention to me anymore.

Posted by slimjim, Dec 13, 2007 2:43PM

@2:22 you son of a bitch. You fags never fail. Make one reference about how gays are degenerate disease carriers and all of a sudden you are a closet homo. At least us straight men did not have sex with a little green monkey and then bring the HIV to the rest of the world. Thank you gay men for this great contribution to society

Posted by seth peck, Dec 13, 2007 2:50PM

don't let slimjim bullshit you guys. he met me in the bear stearns 14th floor men's room 30 minutes ago. and he does way more than go balls deep...

Posted by dickhead, Dec 13, 2007 2:56PM

Slimjim's straight .... his wife's name is Bubba

Posted by dickhead, Dec 13, 2007 2:57PM

Slimjim's straight .... his wife's name is Bubba

Posted by gg, Dec 13, 2007 2:59PM

Slimjim died in a swimming pool in Palm Beach

Posted by CH, Dec 13, 2007 3:01PM

Slimjim is a CHIMP

Posted by LC, Dec 13, 2007 3:03PM

Slimjim 's nom de guerre is Larry Craig

Posted by LC, Dec 13, 2007 3:03PM

Slimjim 's nom de guerre is Larry Craig

Posted by I'm a dude, Dec 13, 2007 3:03PM

why do all conversations on this site turn into everyone calling each other homos?

Posted by slimjim, Dec 13, 2007 3:10PM

@3:03 Don't ask me, all the fags want attention. Which answers the question why they are gay, they are sick and want to get back at daddy for not taking them to a baseball game. So as revenge they suck penis. What better way to dishonor your family then to be a homosexual.

Posted by , Dec 13, 2007 3:13PM

slimjim is real funny. Hey Slim, what do you think of Issrael?

Posted by 1-2, Dec 13, 2007 3:14PM

SlimJim, you must be getting pretty desperate to break out "little green monkeys" and "HIV" in your rebuttles.

Life: 8,367,363
Slimjim: 0

Posted by L. Craig via M. Foley's bedroom computer. J. McGreevy is here too, Dec 13, 2007 3:14PM

You're all homos.

Posted by Ted Haggard, Dec 13, 2007 3:20PM

That's slim for you- small shaft but great crank.

Posted by innocent bystander, Dec 13, 2007 3:23PM

the funny thing is that slimjim's comebacks are better than 99% if of the comments people make about him

Posted by HAM'05, Dec 13, 2007 3:24PM

slimjim: everyone knows little green monkeys are notoriously difficult to nail so your africa aids theory is flawed from the premise.

IF you are lucky enough to get in there though...glorious

Posted by anon, Dec 13, 2007 3:26PM

@ 3:23

agreed

Posted by anon, Dec 13, 2007 3:28PM

@ 3:23

agreed

Posted by One synapse clapping, Dec 13, 2007 3:31PM

that cinches it- UWS butty boy, great crank and successful spelling of innocent. slimjim works for bear.

Posted by Mr. Yellow, Dec 13, 2007 3:43PM

You can get monkeys to have sex with you if you buy them a lot of Mike's Hard Lemonade.

Posted by seth peck, Dec 13, 2007 3:52PM

@ Mr. Yellow

agreed

Posted by slimjim, Dec 13, 2007 4:01PM

I would like to thank all my fans during this trying time. You guys are a real blessing. We must unite against the fungepackers. I never knew there where so many gays on this message board. Just goes to show you these animals can blend in anywhere, anytime. So we must be vigilant or these gays will attack our assholes. Keep the faith and remember only gays get HIV.

Posted by , Dec 13, 2007 4:01PM

well, regarding SIV conversion into HIV either man had monkey $ex or hunter looking for bushmeat had open wounds and blood of his kill (monkey with SIV) got into his wounds. 2nd case brought up whole new viruses (harmless so far/ wired) into NYC due to African appetite for bushmeat. Just a matter of time before some new mutated virius pops up. Personally eating chimp/monkey meat is almost same as earting human meat. I will let slimjim take over from here!

Posted by Senator Craig, Dec 13, 2007 4:12PM

L. Craig via M. Foley's bedroom computer. J. McGreevy is here too---best name ever.

Posted by f, Dec 13, 2007 4:16PM

you have no fans Slimjim , even you're dead mother and father hated you

Posted by slimjim, Dec 13, 2007 4:25PM

@4:01. I don't know where you are getting your info but i can tell you one thing. No brother is eating any bush. They never have and never will. Brothers are notoriously against eating bush. Just ask any African on your way home tonight if they like to eat bush. 50% chance you walk away without your wallet.

Posted by , Dec 13, 2007 4:30PM

here you go brother - recent bust at JFK. Enjoy your ebola roast with L.Craig

http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2003/08/01/eveningnews/consumer/main566325.shtml

Posted by A snake in the grass, Dec 13, 2007 4:30PM

The details of my slimjim's life are quite inconsequential... very well, where do I begin? His father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. His mother was a fifteen year old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. His father would womanize, he would drink. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. The sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. His childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring he'd make meat helmets. When he was insolent he was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds- pretty standard really. At the age of twelve he received his first scribe. At the age of fourteen a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved his testicles.

Posted by , Dec 13, 2007 4:30PM

crazy eyez killa loves to eat the bush

Posted by , Dec 13, 2007 4:34PM

crazy eyez killa loves to eat the bush

Posted by slimjim, Dec 13, 2007 4:45PM

Can you get dehydrated from drinking too much UWS gizz?

Posted by slimjim, Dec 13, 2007 4:47PM

crazy eyez killa might eat bush but he is a work of fiction. In real life Chris Williams is not eating bush. Also Snake in the grass you must be my fist jewish fan becasue we all know that the code word for a heeb is a snake in the grass, thank you and find jesus as soon as you can. Don't forget Hillary in 08 Faggots.

Posted by slimjim, Dec 13, 2007 4:51PM

@4:45 You bastard. Is nothing off limits anymore?

Posted by slimjim, Dec 13, 2007 4:55PM

A day without chugging massive UWS cock is a day not worth living.

Posted by , Dec 13, 2007 4:55PM

Wow I'm sorry this comment is buried all the way at the bottom here but Total Assets at Lehman Brothers is $691 billion. lat quarter L3 assets were $35 billion. this is not even close to 13%. where are you even getting this number?

Posted by A snake in the grass, Dec 13, 2007 4:56PM

i like eating a bald kitty

Posted by , Dec 13, 2007 5:00PM

slimjim what about in the movies? brothers definitely eat bush in pornos

Posted by slimjim, Dec 13, 2007 5:07PM

thats becasue they are paid to do that but on their own free will they only like to lay pipe. Ask any of their babies moma.

Posted by , Dec 13, 2007 5:10PM

brothers are paid to do that on film

Posted by UWS twink, Dec 13, 2007 5:10PM

Slim, if you've earned that reputation I keep hearing about, you can have all the bottled water you like at my place.

Posted by slimjim, Dec 13, 2007 5:17PM

God damn you fags are relentless. I will give you an A for effort and a HIV for being a degenerate piece of shit.

Posted by deus ex machina, Dec 13, 2007 8:50PM

slim, don't forget to use a condom the next time you get laid...whenever your first time may be. Since gays are the only ones to get hiv and pulling out keeps girls from getting pregnant (who am i kidding, you won't be screwing anyone with a uterus...especially since in the off chance you are a heterosexual, you're probably wasting time being angry because you either a) wish you were gay so you could get back at your dad for, or reenact when, he fucked you up the ass b) just can't get it up...you just can't get it up...) you have nothing to lose!

In all seriousness folks, Jesus says abstinence. It'd probably be best for us all if you took his advice.