• Lehman Brothers: Tonight, 7 pm, Pier Sixty at Chelsea Piers. Our tipster seems to think this means “there won’t be any writedown that the Street keeps talking about coz [sic] the bonuses will be announced before the party and I’d be pretty dumbstruck if those will be cut today—they had plenty of time to announce and prepare us for the worst!”
• Goldman Sachs (derivatives): Tonight, 6 pm, the Volstead
• Carlyle: Tonight, 7 pm, Central Park Boathouse. Would’ve been infinitely cooler if it were the Boat Basin but whatevs, live and let live.
• Citi (FIG): December 13, 6 pm, 583 Park Ave. Fun fact: this sometime party venue is a Christian Science church, which rents itself out for special events. The Scientists get a percentage of the revenue from each party, and still worship there during the week. “Christian Science” is inscribed in huge letters on the outside, and creeps us out every time we walk past it on the way home. We’ll be going, if only because Hank Paulson is rumored to be DJ’ing the event, and it’s been a while since we saw someone palm a basketball.
• Some firm called MJX Capital Advisors: December 14, 6 pm, Plataforma. There will apparently only be 7 people there but go anyway, hilarity will ensue.
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More Holiday Parties You’re Not Invited To But Are Encouraged To Attend: Lehman, Goldman, Carlyle, Citi, Etc.
By John CarneyComments (16)
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LEH Equities party tonight — True
LEH Equities Bonuses today — False
Anyone else just think that “Goldman Sachs Derivitives” paired with The Volstead just looks funny, given the contradiction in personalities/the venue.
Unless you work at GS, prepare for the fact your bonus will suck this year
why would anyone in equities who doesn’t completely such ass get a lower bonus this year?
bess, u like the frat house basement floor appeal of the Boat Basin?
Bonuses sucking?
We got double cash bonuses this year, bitches.
JMan,
thanks for re-iterating the same point that every business publication has made clear multiple times this year.
2:00, you’re right…Non-FICC businesses are being paid up via the reduced comp from ex-FICC, or harshly punished FICC employees.
haha….It’s truly laughable to think about a bunch of GS derivitive guys (or really most derivitive guys) huddled in a small dark room, trying to act cool, with nothing more than their bonuses and quant talk to discuss. Plenty of RE guys may not get paid this year, but there’s only so much being a tool is worth.
You are getting a much much lower bonus for misbehavior. A timeout was considered but was rejected because no one has gone to jail just yet.
Watch out at the GS party – Ben Stein might come in disguise to put Visine in your drinks.
I hope the rest of you enjoy your Mike’s Hard Lemonade – that will be your bonus for this year. And no – you will not be allowed to take any home from the bar.
Bear will be holding their holiday party the day before bonuses are announced. Probably at some shit venue like the Marriott across from their Brooklyn office. What a cesspool!
Bonuses this year include a Happy Meal and a blunt from Jimmy.
LEH FI Bonus today — Nah
JEF – MOMA tonight
GS FICC party is Dec. 12 (comp announcement day) at Marquis.
didn’t see bess at leh tonight. did she not bother?
Will all the portable ID recognition gizmos how was bess going to enter the Lehman party? May be dressed up as a waitress in a Mao suit. I wonder if she would have looked that hot in that dress.