UBS: We Have Zero Dollars. It Is Time For A Lavish Party.

ubs.pngOne of the reasons we love the Swiss is that they live beyond their means, without apology. While some of the other banks negatively affected by subprime, someone's drug problem, etc. are scaling back their holiday parties (for instance, Bear is holding its main event at the Sizzler and the plan is to skip out check), UBS is saying "$10 billion and counting writedown be damned, 2007's winter solstice shall be the grandest of them all." This year's wealth management funfest will begin at 7 pm on the evening of the 17th at the Museum of Natural History. Now, I know some of you want to say, "Well, 2006's party was at Rockefeller Center so, relatively speaking, this is a downgrade," but you're wrong. Whale beats tree. It's that simple. Upgrade. (UBS's IBD get together is tonight at 583 Park, which isn't a bad venue for a unit maybe worth negative 22 billion dollars.)

Comments

Posted by inIT4the$, Dec 11, 2007 2:48PM

"Whale beats tree" - This will be the title of something I write someday when I'm doing something else.

Posted by 1-2, Dec 11, 2007 3:07PM

Last year was at the Met--and you havent lived until you've seen Roehner get down under the Pyramid.

Get it right or pay the price, Budnick.

1-2

Posted by , Dec 11, 2007 3:09PM

last year was at rockefeller center, 1-2.

Posted by 1-2, Dec 11, 2007 3:14PM

Not WMUS, which is what's at the Nat History this year.

Posted by , Dec 11, 2007 3:17PM

oh yeah? then that time Roehner and i went skating on the rink was just something i made up in my head?

Posted by gettheirony, Dec 11, 2007 3:21PM

Its in the Aquarium room because the Bank is underwater. Nothing like a CONSTANT reminder of it...

Posted by 1-2, Dec 11, 2007 3:23PM

Well, either i was more blacked out than i thought or i cant tell the difference between massive indoor pyramid or an outdoor ice rink...hmmmmm

Seeing as how i was neither blacked out (a rarity, i'll give that to you), and im the one non-incompetetant person at this firm I'll say it was at the met.

Obviously he could have been at both events, but I know WMUS was at the Met.

Agree to disagree.

1-2

Posted by 1-2, Dec 11, 2007 3:26PM

Either way i hope you ripped some wicked triple toe loop quad sow cow spinner magees with him!

Posted by guess that would explain why he's got enough free time to leave comments on DB, Dec 11, 2007 3:31PM

1-2, you work at ubs?

Posted by Captain Stabbin, Dec 11, 2007 3:43PM

Why is LuLu up ~8% today? I like sloots in skin-tight pants as much as the next guy, butt this movement is beyond me

Posted by Ben W., Dec 11, 2007 3:49PM

This is great news. Another Nazi bank losing it's shirt. I guess when you are in the money laundering business, everything seems to catch up w/u. So much for the discreet Swiss bankers.

Posted by , Dec 11, 2007 3:55PM

didn't realize Merrill, Bear and Citi were Nazi banks

Posted by 1-2, Dec 11, 2007 4:21PM

Sorry, gotta get back to work: busy laundering money for ze germans over at Alex Brown's Coke Management Division in Miami.

Posted by Popitz and Von Heyek Capital Advisors, LLC, Dec 11, 2007 4:32PM

Someone say, "Nazi Banks" ?

Posted by pierre, Dec 11, 2007 4:43PM

"Alex Brown's Coke Management Division"...ha

Posted by Rocko, Dec 11, 2007 7:46PM

United Bank of Singapore

Posted by Former Eye-Patch Wearing Joker, Dec 12, 2007 7:01AM

Hey at least they're getting a party....all my former place got was a big "final resting place" for my boss to the tune of $1MM

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