Discovering that the exclusive international ring of prostitutes known as the "Emperor's Club" charged up to $5,500 an hour for their services, New York governor Eliot Spitzer vowed to put an end to this price gouging practice.
Four people alleged to have run the "Emperor's Club" were charged with conspiracy to violate federal prostitution statutes, while two of them were also charged with laundering more than $1 million in illegal proceeds.
"That kind of excessive compensation is simply outrageous. Prostitution is allegedly a victimless crime,” Spitzer said in a press conference that took place only in our imaginations. “But now we see that its customers can become its victims.”
Spitzer added it was especially shameful that one of the most trusted names in prostitution had engaged in this shocking betrayal and rank greed.
Posted by guest , Mar 10, 2008 5:58PM
There's no such thing as a $5,500 an hour hooker.
There is such a thing as a John willing to pay $5,500 an hour, however ...
Posted by guest , Mar 10, 2008 6:12PM
When it costs $1500 plus to have sex in the VIP room at Scores West -- and Penthouse and Hustler -- why shouldn't cost quite a bit more to have sex with a better looking woman who hasn't already had sex with four or five fat sweaty guys in the past few hours?
You get what you pay for.
Posted by guest , Mar 10, 2008 6:15PM
I thought there was no sex in the champagne room.
Posted by BSD , Mar 10, 2008 6:24PM
You're on fire today, John. Concise and spicy.
Posted by guest , Mar 10, 2008 6:52PM
Outmotherfuckingstanding. The Onion called, John, and they want their schtick back.
Posted by guest , Mar 10, 2008 6:54PM
@6:52. agreed. painful.
Posted by guest , Mar 10, 2008 7:09PM
Very Very Funny!!!!!!!!!!
Posted by guest , Mar 10, 2008 8:00PM
I had to come in here to comment that this is the funniest headline I've seen in a long time.
Posted by guest , Mar 10, 2008 8:35PM
.
Best Headline ....
since New York Post's
"Headless Body found in Topless Bar"
.
Posted by guest , Mar 10, 2008 10:16PM
As the old joke goes, at some level of celebrity, they're not paying the lady for what she does, they're paying her to go home quietly afterwards. Looks likes someone got short-changed...
Posted by guest , Mar 10, 2008 10:19PM
Kristen the hooker will have min:
-Book deal
-Movie deal
-record deal
-Lawsuit aginst Eliott
That was the best night of her life....
Posted by guest , Mar 10, 2008 10:50PM
Remember, you don't pay hookers for sex. You pay them so that they will leave when you are done. I know that hurts, but it's true.
Posted by guest , Mar 11, 2008 12:54AM
I had a dream where I was sitting next to Elliott Spitzer at Harry's Bar at the Waldorf. He told me his name was "Rudy Giuliani." I knew he was lying, but I went with it. He invited me up to his suite to see surveillance tapes of "a notorious wall-street whoremonger," and then put his hand on my thigh.
He looked into my eyes and told me a joke about how Whisky is like Vaseline.
Does this make me gay?
Posted by guest , Mar 11, 2008 2:12AM
Nice to see that dealbreaker has achieved an Andy Borowitz level of hilarity.
Posted by guest , Mar 11, 2008 7:12AM
The internet can tear apart in hours what it used to take the networks and newpapers days or weeks to destroy (assuming they even wanted to go after a friendly). Sweeeet!
Great headline.
Posted by guest , Mar 11, 2008 11:34AM
One of the best headlines I have ever read. Keep up the great work improving our mundane Wall Street existences with your higher-brow version of locker room humor. Love it love it love it.
Other potential headlines for future use...
Spitzer Swallows Pride
The New Head of State
Spitzer Gets Off, Wife Gets Half
oh the fun we'll have...
Posted by guest , Mar 11, 2008 11:38AM
Spitzer Makes Back Door Deal for Constituents
Posted by guest , Mar 11, 2008 11:39AM
Spitzer Makes Back Door Deal for Constituents
Posted by guest , Mar 11, 2008 5:52PM
Stock Market up huge, celebration of Spitzer's disgrace????
Posted by guest , Mar 11, 2008 10:27PM
For a book about prostitution, you may be interested in Naked in Haiti: A Sexy Morality Tale About Tourists, Prostitutes & Politicians. www.dankingbooks.com will get you there.
Posted by guest , Mar 13, 2009 11:40AM
The AG is aware of the hiring of some beauties to perform as reporters on the financial channels. And we know already about the many perks offered and accepted by some. Is there being under the table fees involved. If you don't have the authority to track this down and publicize names.........get the hell out of Dodge.