This Sounds About Right

Posted by Bess Levin, Mar 31, 2008, 4:10pm

Susan Krakower sits, stands, perches, then paces the length of her windowless office. A crease deepens down the center of her forehead. In two hours "Fast Money" airs, and something's not right. The show she created isn't moving fast enough in its second segment, and that's a problem. "I want the trades - get right to it!" she explains. Tonight she's trying something new. It's a quick interlude she dreamed up the previous morning after watching her 7-year-old son's favorite TV programs, Nickelodeon's "iCarly" and "Drake and Josh," which rely on graphics to move the narrative. When the show airs, she'll head downstairs to the control room to swap a new, 15-second sound and visual effect in place of a riff by host Dylan Ratigan.

CNBC feels your pain... [Fortune]

1Recommend this! 30Comments

Tags: 7 year olds, CNBC

Comments

Posted by guest, Mar 31, 2008 4:23PM

I hate Dylan Ratigan. He thinks he's a comedian or a hipster commentator, rather than a news reader. Stick with the facts, I don't care about your opinion. I really hate when he walks through the NYSE floor, doing his free-association schtick - reminds me of Eddie Murphy's entrance in "Raw".

Why not turn it off, you ask? We have it on all day at my firm (hedge fund) during market hours. Thank god I don't have to watch the after-hours programs (Fast Money, Cramer's Show, Donny Dork's show, etc).

Posted by guest, Mar 31, 2008 4:26PM

Agreed, if Ratigan is so damn smart, why doesn't he work in the business instead of "reporting" on it?

PS
Is there any way to get Dennis Nealman off the air? He's just as retarded and a little harder to look at.

Posted by guest, Mar 31, 2008 4:48PM

come on
where's the love for santelli???
only CNBCer worth listening to

his Liesman smackdowns are priceless

"oh my god.. he's crazy"

"Who's whispering? I heard that"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OIDyhBDs29o

Posted by guest, Mar 31, 2008 4:51PM

The point of having a rigorous hiring process is to keep the influence of the dim witted out of the firm

If a firm is going to leave CNBC on all day, they may as well just randomly hire every 20th person who sends in a CV

Posted by guest, Mar 31, 2008 5:08PM

Yeah, my last firm had CNBC on all day, and I thought it was important to know what stocks and stories they were highlighting at a given time.

Where I am now, it's on the trading floor only and I can't hear it -- and I don't miss it a bit. My trusty extra monitor with Bloomberg more than picks up the slack, and I'm glad I don't have that CNBC noise blaring in the background.

Posted by guest, Mar 31, 2008 5:09PM

CNBC want ratings? Show this:

http://www.newsoftheworld.co.uk/3003_nazi_orgy.shtml

Posted by Lowly Assistant, Mar 31, 2008 5:09PM

I actually appreciate the fact they're all fucked up over there. Makes for entertaining background noise.
Anyone who takes to heart these talking heads has some major issues. If Chuck G. can't roll up his sleeves another day, then the terrorists have won.

Posted by guest, Mar 31, 2008 5:12PM

The only reason a hedge fund should have CNBC on is so that when Mrs. Sykes comes by to clean the office/apartment, she know's that Tim is busy trading his 15k in penny stocks.

Posted by guest, Mar 31, 2008 5:19PM

Snark aside, the point of having CNBC on all day long isn't to learn new information. It's to know what you already know. You should already know about 80% of the "news" that comes across the tape, either by your own analysis, word of mouth, being plugged into the rumor mill, etc. So that means that you get attuned to the other 20% that really is "new news", of which 5% is actually market-moving.

With that in mind, I wish they would acknowledge that we don't want their quips and teasers. Just give us the damn information.

Posted by guest, Mar 31, 2008 5:23PM

5%? try .1%. CNBC i just one big mutual fund pump and dump cluster jerk. Every once in a blue moon they put something "new" on the tube.

Posted by Anal_yst, Mar 31, 2008 5:24PM

@ 5:19

Isn't that what BloombergTV is for?

Posted by guest, Mar 31, 2008 5:37PM

Am i experiencing Deja Vu, or is another IBank about to bite the bullet in the exact same fashion...

Posted by guest, Mar 31, 2008 5:37PM

5:23 uhhh...nope, sorry, go back to jr. high math. I said "20% is 'new news' OF WHICH 5% is market moving." So 100% x 20% x 5% = 1%, not 0.1%.

5:24: Bloomberg TV is worse. They basically recycle the Bloomberg feature articles, sometimes word-for-word. It's like having a books-on-tape version of a BBG terminal. Also, they have too many brits with bad teeth presenting. Say what you will about Erin Burnett, but she's easy on the eyes.

Wait a minute. How did I get in the position of defending CNBC? I hate watching CNBC.

Posted by guest, Mar 31, 2008 5:39PM

I hate CNBC. But I think Erin B is crazy hot.

Posted by guest, Mar 31, 2008 5:40PM

Guest @ 5.37...

Which IB? I am short most of them...

My luck its an offsetting paired trade...

~Stupid Equity Guy

Posted by guest, Mar 31, 2008 5:59PM

5:37 uh, no i'm saying .1% of the "new news" is market moving. you should read the question more carefully before you submit your answer.

Posted by guest, Mar 31, 2008 6:07PM

Ahhh Q 5:59, please tell us your not our brain surgeon... the irony of your latest comment is... painful.

Posted by guest, Mar 31, 2008 6:13PM

5:59 - Yeah but 0.00000000001% of the information posted on DB is market moving. But I justify spending time on this site because maybe, just maybe, some news will break on this site. The Bess Levin postings about strippers and pole dancers are just the cream on top (so to speak).


Posted by guest, Mar 31, 2008 6:13PM

uh what? you think its 5% of the 20% and i think its .1% of the 20% how does that make me retarded?

Posted by guest, Mar 31, 2008 6:53PM

Be quiet about Erin Burnett. She's a mildly pretty talking head whose 15 minutes of fame is about up. Which Ibank is about to bite the bullet?

Posted by guest, Mar 31, 2008 7:17PM

Hey guys, JudgeJudy here. Good for CNBC, but we all know that a year from now FBN is going to beat them like the Charlie the Gasbag beats his teeny weeny. Statistics have proven that when Gasbagarumor is on, mute button usage is quintupled. What a fucking, obnoxious piece of shit. Send the dope back to "da bronx" to work on his "dees' and "dooos".

Just for the record, despite his funky glasses, Dennis made him look like the absolute fool that he is. I hope that the CNBC management has taken note and made plans to dump the dope.

Posted by guest, Mar 31, 2008 10:00PM

So who the fuck is JudgeJudy and what makes her such a media expert. Of course, the Gasman is an airhead, a dope, a thug and an obnoxious moron. Just remember he's our little moron.

Posted by guest, Mar 31, 2008 10:27PM

Lay off Judge Jude. I've seen her other postings here. They are hysterical. Let her rip JJ!

Posted by guest, Apr 01, 2008 12:56AM

Before she went on TV, I had to appear in court (as an attorney) before the real Judge Judy. I was unopposed, but that didn't stop her from ignoring me, interrupting me, dressing me down, and completely misinterpreting what I was miserably trying to say. When she graduated to TV stardom, New York jurisprudence was the clear winner.

Posted by guest, Apr 01, 2008 9:55AM

I had a dream last night. Dylan Ratigan was sitting across from me at Bobby Vans. He was drinking a Cosmo. We locked eyes across the crowded bar. He told me his name was "Neil Cavuto," I knew he was lying, but I went with it. Erin BUrnett was pole-dancing in the background, the glistening of her pasty-white buttocks distracted me, and I could tell that this was upsetting "Neil."

He asked me up to his "studio" for a "private screening" of a pilot about the genitalia of Wall Street.

Is that gay?

Posted by guest, Apr 01, 2008 10:07AM

I think you may be GAnalYst

Posted by guest, Apr 01, 2008 10:11AM

GAnalYst here. That was not me at 9:55. DR however does have his charms. Most gay guys would do him. And, I've said it before, the line between gay and straight is not always clear cut.

Posted by guest, Apr 01, 2008 10:29AM

Who does Dylan's hair?

Posted by guest, Apr 01, 2008 10:40AM

10:29 I saw a lot of that hair in Southern Illinois circa 1963.

Posted by guest, Apr 01, 2008 12:34PM

pedigrees aside, Becky Q over Erin B any day.

And iCarly over CNBC, also any day. Then again, the School of Rock girl will probably replace ErinB as soon as she's Of Age.

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