We Came Not To Praise Spitzer, But To Bury Him

Posted by guest, Mar 13, 2008 4:10PM

Was their any "merger activity" after the party? Any hot investment banking girls learn about Pink Sheets last night? If this site has Tad or Thad or whatever the canjun guy's name is - why can't we guys have stories about Jennifer - the good investment analyst by day, slutty bad girl by night? When's that Fairness Doctrine gonna be passed? As a guy, I feel discriminated against.

Posted by golden girl, Mar 13, 2008 4:11PM

JC - thanks for hosting. had a great time and was annoyed I had to leave so quickly!

Posted by Random Banker, Mar 13, 2008 4:11PM

The evil that men do lives after them;
The good is oft interred with their bones;
So let it be with Spitzer. The noble Bruno
Hath told you Spitzer was ambitious:
If it were so, it was a grievous fault,
And grievously hath Spitzer answer'd it.
Here, under leave of Bruno and the rest -
For Bruno is an honourable man;
So are they all, all honourable men -
Come I to speak in Spitzer's funeral.
He was my friend, faithful and just to me:
But Bruno says he was ambitious;
And Bruno is an honourable man.
He hath brought many captives home from Wall
Whose ransoms did the general coffers fill:
Did this in Spitzer seem ambitious?
When that the poor have cried, Spitzer hath wept:
Ambition should be made of sterner stuff:
Yet Bruno says he was ambitious;
And Bruno is an honourable man.
You all did see that on Skadden
He was thrice presented with a kingly crown,
Which he did thrice refuse: was this ambition?
Yet Bruno says he was ambitious;
And, sure, he is an honourable man.
I speak not to disprove what Bruno spoke,
But here I am to speak what I do know.
You all did love him once, not without cause:
What cause withholds you then, to mourn for him?
O judgment! thou art fled to brutish beasts,
And men have lost their reason. Bear with me;
My heart is in the coffin there with Spitzer,
And I must pause till it come back to me.

- Marc A. Cramer

Posted by golden girl, Mar 13, 2008 4:11PM

@guest 4:10 - just call me Jennifer.

Posted by guest, Mar 13, 2008 4:17PM

Well Jennifer, let's hear about last night after the party. After you had waaaayy to much to imbibe. Let's face it: we're ALL really bored at work and justwaiting for the weekend. Now is *your* chance to share the details of your day/night life with us all. No detail is too small for us all to enjoy.

Posted by Investorcluzo, Mar 13, 2008 4:24PM

JC thanks for hosting the party, special shout out to your sponsors for funding the libations.

@ 4:10: I can't say for certain because I left before any shenanigans began. that said, it looked like there were several bankers working on the numbers. my bet is that we could see a merger announcement or two over the weekend. however, discussions could still break down if the parties fail to reach an agreement.

Posted by big r, Mar 13, 2008 4:30PM

was there enough MHL for everyone?

Posted by guest, Mar 13, 2008 4:30PM

@4:10, were you one of those guys who always watched Sex & the City?

Posted by girl, Mar 13, 2008 4:32PM

Good times

Posted by guest, Mar 13, 2008 4:38PM

@4:24 Thanks for the play-by-play. I bet that any deals consummated last night had a substantial penalty for early withdrawl. A big breakup fee is you will. Now if we could only read about Jennifer's deal making last night... I'm sure her story would make all investors go long...so to speak.

Posted by Chuck Krug, Mar 13, 2008 4:38PM

heard a rumour that Spitzer was setup

Posted by GinNTonic, Mar 13, 2008 4:47PM

Next time us mid-towners need some love

Posted by guest, Mar 13, 2008 4:50PM

did JC collect everyone's email address for his corporate spam list?

Posted by guest, Mar 13, 2008 4:56PM

@4:30 No - like most pre-millenial hetero guys I grew up with ol' Penthouse Letters. The stories are only good with lots of details. SATS is for girls and guys who play for the 'other' team. Not that's there anything wrong with that...
Now where's Jennifer telling us all how that cute guy in Fixed Income made her play 'Kristen' last night (and even left her a fresh hundred to spend on new shoes) and how she could barely walk this morning?

Posted by guest, Mar 13, 2008 5:01PM

Chuck Krug -- A lot of lawyers who have become familiar with the facts have no doubt it was a "set up." The feds just don't spend the resources to go after a john unless there is a reason, like a serious separate crime. It appears that Spitzer was manipulating his own personal money to pursue his interest, so what's the big deal about "structuring"? The problem is the hypocrisy. Spitzer made himself so hated by everyone outside his camp there was no one to defend him when he was caught. He didn't fall because he was in legal troouble, he fell because he was in political trouble.

Posted by guest, Mar 13, 2008 5:05PM

short of Penthouse Forum, anything told from the female POV is going to be basically intolerable (see: SATC)

Posted by Random Banker, Mar 13, 2008 5:14PM

Someone give me credit for my brilliant adaption of Elizabethan theater for the purpose of blog commenting on spitzer. You philistines, it was brilliant. BRILLIANT.

Posted by girl, Mar 13, 2008 5:22PM

hahah it was indeed brilliant. Perhaps too highbrow for the few brain cells we've collectively saved

Posted by Investorcluzo, Mar 13, 2008 5:37PM

@ random banker: stop the madness, please. if you want praise for your "adaptation" go talk to your 6th grade english teacher or take it to the media types at gawker.

@ girl: don't encourage random banker's nonsense...unless, of course, you two are going to put out a joint press release on monday to announce your merger agreement - thus, pleasing the peanut gallery that is @ 4:56 ( ;

Posted by guest, Mar 13, 2008 5:40PM

@5:14 I would've preferred an adaptation of "Serving the Guv" giving us all a Penthouse Letters version of what went on - with real pictures. You can keep the highbrow narratives for the opera fans, Drama Queeens, and SATS boys. We real guys just want to know how many pearl necklaces he gave her and if she could suck the chrome off a '57 Chevy. Sorry to be blunt, but all the Elizabethean movies combined last year were probably crushed by The Simpson's first weekend. DOH!

Posted by guest, Mar 13, 2008 5:55PM

girl and golden girl are far too optimistic and cheerful.

please stop.

Posted by Bulging Bracket, Mar 13, 2008 6:27PM

Random that was awesome!

Posted by guest, Mar 13, 2008 6:31PM

How about a girl/golden girl 'After Work Special' story then?

Posted by Cov Lite, Mar 13, 2008 6:39PM

I wasn't there, but I would imagine there to be far greater acquirors than targets.

So, difficult to envision a merger, unless it was a club deal / consortium buyout.

Posted by Investorcluzo, Mar 13, 2008 7:16PM

as with any auction situation, there were strategic buyers and financial buyers. at the end of the day, one buyer will find more value in the target than others and a deal will be consummated. club deals, while nice, oft end with someone getting the short end of the "stick". the targets were pretty savvy - I believe they were looking for nice clean deal without a bunch of contingencies...not to mention, in this market with "tight" credit and few deals, financial buyers aren't looking for partners, they are just looking to put as much of their "assets" to work as possible before the market "drys" up.

Posted by guest, Mar 14, 2008 1:44AM

Random Banker's adaption of the speech from "Julius Caesar" was lame. All he did was substitute a few proper nouns.

Posted by guest, Mar 14, 2008 7:46AM

*drumroll*

*fanfare*

Random Banker, we at the Dealbreaker Comedy Awards are pleased to present you with Best Use Of The Search And Replace Function 2008. Truly, you are an inspiration to all of us.

That enough recognition for you? Good, now get off my stage, it's time to announce the nominees for the Least Funny Pederastry-Based Joke.

Posted by Random Banker, Mar 14, 2008 11:09AM

Uh, the fact that i only substituted a couple nouns is sort of the point. right i mean spitzer's fall is an age old tale as old as society itself. I think the part that makes it funny is that part about captives taken from "Wall" filling the public coffers with ransom.... but what do i know.

Posted by guest, Mar 14, 2008 1:55PM

Was Bess at there? What was she wearing? Did she throw up or pass out?

Posted by guest, Mar 14, 2008 2:16PM

@1:55 Maybe she threw out a pass up to Kareem Abdul Jabbar, beating Michael Jordan and Magic Johnson in the greatest game of 2-on-2 b-ball Rivington has ever seen

Posted by Anonymous, Mar 14, 2008 10:34PM

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