Damien Hirst, the little artist lover boy of several notable hedge fund managers, has churned out yet another masterpiece of ridiculousness. This time it’s a line of psychedelic jeans for Levis, inspired by work of Andy Warhol. Unlike Hirst’s pickled tiger shark, which Steve Cohen bought for $8 million, and a diamond encrusted skull, sold to an unnamed investment group who requested anonymity because this is the sort of purchase that gets you a reputation for being insane, the pants go for the extremely reasonable price of $80,000 a pop. As we’ve mentioned in the past, a great way to ingratiate yourself with the boss is to suck up to him or her by pretending to have the same interests no matter how out there they may be (hence, my sudden interest in Dungeons and Dragons role play). So while the historically exorbitant cost of buying a dead fish and housing it in formaldehyde may have kept you, lowly SAC analyst, from getting in with the Big Guy in the past, you now have no excuse not to show up to work wearing the same outfit as the BG, and remarking on the “coincidence,” thereby taking your daily interactions from non-existent to awkward. I smell a raise.
Damien Hirst Is Really Into Jeans [Gawker]
Posted by guest , Apr 08, 2008 4:08PM
Re that pickled shark. Don't know if I would pay $8 million for it, but its worth checking out on the second floor of the Met Museum, on loan from Mr. Cohen. Quite a stirring sight, seeing it while the light streams in from the park and reading the title: The Physical Impossibility of Death in the Mind of Someone Living. No need to thank me for today's culture tip. Just don't make me take a client to see the Yankees. I can't stand sitting through a basketball game. Or are they hockey? GAnalYst
Posted by guest , Apr 08, 2008 4:13PM
"hence, my sudden interest in Dungeons and Dragons role play"
Bess, what other types of role play do you enjoy? I think I speak for everyone when I say Dungeons and Dragons just doesn't do it for us.
Posted by guest , Apr 08, 2008 4:16PM
@ 4:13-- BESS isn't into D&D role-play, carney is.
Posted by guest , Apr 08, 2008 4:17PM
Did Mr. Cohen star in last night's episode of House? If he did, he gave a moving performance as an angry patient fighting the prejudices of society and the medical field. Bravo!
Thadius R. Rogers
Film Producer/Evaluator of Talent
Posted by guest , Apr 08, 2008 4:21PM
Thank you for using the proper exclamative form for hitting the register: "ka-ching".
Primarily basis traders, debt traders, real estate flippers and other known idiots use the improper form of the winning exclamative: "cha-ching".
As Brian Hunter and Jerome Kerviel should know, the opposite of "ka-ching" is "KA-BOOM". And Rupert says it sounds better than "cha-ching".
Posted by guest , Apr 08, 2008 4:22PM
@4:16 I think you should buy Hooked on Phonics and re read the post. The author is "Bess Levin" and she talks about people who suck up to their boss' before she says "hence, my sudden interest in Dungeons and Dragons role play."
Did you just get laid off by JPM when they cut BSC's employment program for the disabled???
Posted by guest , Apr 08, 2008 4:26PM
@4:13/4:22-- you should look into reading comprehension classes. THE REASON she's saying she's into D and D is because she's following her own advice to "ingratiate yourself with the boss by pretending to have the same interests no matter how out there they may be." i.e. she's pretending to like D and D b/c Carney does. jesus.
Posted by guest , Apr 08, 2008 4:28PM
Re: the shark
As only a DB reader would, I nearly pissed my pants in excitement when I walked into the Met and saw that shark.
-Nom me
Posted by guest , Apr 08, 2008 4:30PM
@4:26
You're a tool. Whatever the point is you will continue to make an ass out of yourself instead of going with the role playing theme. From all of us on this board, shut the fuck up.
Posted by guest , Apr 08, 2008 4:32PM
@4:22 and 4:26 The poster is yet another person, like many other people, confused by her writing style. This occurs at least once EVERY WEEK. I suggest that the problem is not with the numerous readers who have complained. Might I suggest a writing course or a writing stle book? The first step is to admit you have a 'difficulty'. Flame away all you want, but denial is not just a river in Egypt.
Posted by guest , Apr 08, 2008 4:43PM
i am baffled how any of you people can be so confused by bess's writing. this isn't middle english here people.
i suspect this is what happens when the quants started wandering over to read this board after they started posting about all the quant funds blowing up previously.
Posted by guest , Apr 08, 2008 4:49PM
@4:32-- no one's confused by it, you're just the little bitch who says he doesn't like bess's (great) writing every week. run back to the copy editing room now. run little wsj reporter boy, run!
Posted by guest , Apr 08, 2008 4:51PM
the D & D reference a bit insider to DB, a bit intellectually snobbish (have to be a WSJ reader, cover to cover), so give some of the ignorant a break. They can't all be as well informed as the rest of you.
Posted by guest , Apr 08, 2008 5:00PM
@4:51 - there's nothing "insider" about D&D being considered geeky. Nor does it require any intellectual power to comprehend that Bess was implying her boss likes D&D.
Posted by guest , Apr 08, 2008 5:03PM
@4:51 Huh? There's not going to be a test question on it. All you need to know to get a chuckle is a bit about what's going on in the world around you. And if that's a fact that you're not familiar with either a) move on, cause there's going to be another opportunity to chuckle coming along soon or b) if you have the time and the inclination, go to the web (google, urban dictionary, whatever) and poke around a bit to find out what they're talking about. What's the big deal. ITS A BLOGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG STUPID.
Posted by guest , Apr 08, 2008 5:06PM
Getting You The Bonus You Deserve
Posted by Bess Levin, Mar 10, 2008, 8:57am
It might seem like we got a kick out of writing about all of you who took it up the tailpipe this bonus season but, in truth, it pained us. We want you to get big bonuses 'cause when you don't, the Meat Packing district suffers, and Murray Hill suffers, and my beautiful roommate suffers. All unacceptable crimes against humanity. We know it wasn't all your fault-- many of you can simply blame your employers for losing billions of dollars and not having the scratch--, but, if we're being honest, it probably was a little your fault. They could've come up with the money, somehow, but you didn't give them a reason to, and, instead, your boss stuffed 5 gift certificates to the Sizzler in an envelope and thanked you, insincerely, for your time.
In order to prevent this from happening again, we're going to start doling out little tips that will ensure next time around, you'll be saying "Oh, please, Mr. Thain, don't shove another hundo in my mouth." Today's tip is: kiss ass. But not in a transparent, could be construed as sexual harassment way ("You look really good today, Mr. Blankfein, did you do something different with your hair?"). It'll take a little sleuthing, but we generally find the best approach is to find out what your boss's interests are, and pretend to have them, too. I'll lead by example. Say I were trying to kiss Carney's ass, via claiming to like spending my free time the same way he does. I might say something like, "Hey, Carns, I don't know if this is something you're into, but my friends and I are getting together to play some Dungeons and Dragons this weekend, I thought, if you're not doing anything, you'd maybe want to come with, even though it'll be a total geek-fest? LOLOMG, it's your favorite game, too?"
http://dealbreaker.com/2008/03/getting_you_the_bonus_you_dese.php
Posted by guest , Apr 08, 2008 5:07PM
When I was a teenager, rocketing up the employment ladder at Orange Julius during the State Fair of Texas, there was a guy who sold art over by the roasted corn vendor near "Big Tex". That artist took a little 10x10 white paper board and put it on a potter's wheel and it spun at a high rpm. Then he would drip bright colored paints on the spinning white board. After a moment or two and several colors, the spinning would stop and the guy would collect $10 for the spun art. The pants remind me of that art.
Posted by Suits , Apr 08, 2008 5:12PM
I think the "role play" 4:13 was talking about was more along the lines of "Teacher, Student", or "Farm Owner's daughter and Mexican apple picker", as opposed to the D+D RPG's Carney is into.
Posted by guest , Apr 08, 2008 5:13PM
My personal fav is "Coach/Player". GAnalYst
Posted by guest , Apr 08, 2008 5:14PM
the problem is that 4:13's comment implied that bess wasn't into other kinds of role-play, and only into D&D, which she only pretends to like in an effort to ingratiate herself to D&D lover Carney.
Posted by guest , Apr 08, 2008 5:15PM
@5:12 DING DING DING....we have a WINNER! That's exactly what I was referring to, hence the reference to D & D not doing it for us. I wish the rest of the board was as intelligent as us, it would make life so much easier.
Posted by guest , Apr 08, 2008 5:17PM
@5:14 Where do you get that? I never implied she wasn't into other types of role playing. To the contrary, I asked what else she was in to because D & D probably doesn't do it for most of us here.
Posted by guest , Apr 08, 2008 5:17PM
...or "Athletes/Team Manager", the later being the guy who collects the sweaty gear and cleans up the locker room after practice. GAnalYst
Posted by guest , Apr 08, 2008 5:30PM
WTF is phameldahyde? A preservative from the Phillipines? Good Lord.
Posted by guest , Apr 08, 2008 5:34PM
I could totally get into Bess playing the "strict schoolmistress" to my "naughty schoolboy"
Posted by guest , Apr 08, 2008 5:39PM
@5:34-- Bess is a sub.
Posted by guest , Apr 08, 2008 6:07PM
@5:30pm. I think Bess meant "formaldehyde" instead of "phameldahyde." It's a tough word to spell ... basically, no one but dry cleaners, embalmers, and pathologists cares. Before buying that shark preserved in formaldehyde, though, consider that in addition to the art work being absurdly expensive, the fumes from the preservative are also toxic.
Posted by guest , Apr 09, 2008 8:22AM
Anyone with a 10th grade education knows how to spell or at least how to use spell-checker. Stop being a Sally Sensitive to some chick who won't even meet you, much less put out to you.
Posted by guest , Apr 09, 2008 10:51AM
@5:03. you're the idiot. this was meant to say that the D&D reference was on DB as a comment about Carney - not everyone knows that, ya know? had nothing to do with it being a geeky pastime. Learn to read and comprehend before you fire off a non senseical response to someone who bothered to take the time to defend some of the others who didn't get it.