JPMorgan Will Spare No One

Posted by Bess Levin, Apr 07, 2008, 11:25am

mrmet.jpg

I love Jamie Dimon as much as the next guy afflicted with a bad case of Greekorthodoxophilia but I’m worried that he, or his minions, might be evil. I have no problem with the fact that JPMorgan is effectively stealing thirty billion in taxpayer cash to buy Bear Stearns, that’s obviously okay. But the news that JPM is also doing away with the one thing Bear was good for, employing the disabled, leaves me with a bad taste in my mouth, not unlike that of week-old souvlaki. Overlooked among their work as leaders in field of hedge funds, hygiene, card playing and smoking dope was Bear’s commitment to hiring the handicapable, for which the firm was honored with Title I of the ADA Employment Award in 2006. Now, JPMorgan apparently wants to get rid of BSC’s program, as well as about 40 workers with disabilities. I have no idea how much it would cost to keep those 40 guys on but I suspect that it couldn’t be much more than someone's 3-weeks tuition to the nation’s premier bridge camp every year (which, on the DL, is included in the terms of the deal).


Anyway. Go vote on which song Shea-goers should have to sing along to during the 8th inning this season. It doesn’t have much to do with Bear or disabled people, but imagining thousands of Mets fans being subjected to "Never Gonna Give You Up" 81 times makes me feel good inside.


Equal Opportunity Firings At Bear [NYP]

4Recommend this! 34Comments

Tags: Bear Stearns, JP Morgan Chase

Comments

Posted by guest, Apr 07, 2008 11:38AM

No Helen Keller jokes?

Posted by guest, Apr 07, 2008 11:47AM

There were only 40 or so disabled workers at BSC? How do you explain the entire trading operation???

Posted by guest, Apr 07, 2008 11:52AM

zing!!!

Posted by guest, Apr 07, 2008 11:56AM

@11:47 stole my thunder...!!
-The Forehead Slapper

Posted by guest, Apr 07, 2008 12:09PM

It doesn't surprise me. JPM is one of the owners of the FED itelf, with regards to member banks owning shares of the FED. JPM is as corrupt as they come. It's time the power to issue money/unlimited debt be taken out of the hands of the FED and given back to the US TREASURY which is the place it was in the FIRST PLACE. The FED isn't really Federal at all, another misnomer for the misguided American public.

Posted by guest, Apr 07, 2008 12:12PM

Seriously, 12.09? No WAY! Next you'll be telling us 9/11 was an inside job!

Wharfer

Posted by guest, Apr 07, 2008 12:12PM

JPM is scum for doing this.

Get ready for some Dimon karma payback....queens whiny accent & all

Posted by guest, Apr 07, 2008 12:22PM

@12:12 Maybe so but there are plenty of other places that will hire you so quit whining (its unbecoming even if you think you deserve our sympathy) and find another place to work.

Posted by guest, Apr 07, 2008 12:25PM

Dimon is such a pussy. Steve Schwartzmann hunts and eats disabled people when he can't get his hands on crab legs.

Posted by guest, Apr 07, 2008 12:29PM

12:22 Fuck you

Posted by guest, Apr 07, 2008 12:32PM

@12:29 If that's the best you can come back with it may be difficult for you to overcome your disabilities and find another job, now we all understand why you are pissed.

Posted by guest, Apr 07, 2008 12:36PM

This is pretty distressing. It seems like such a positive program -- I hope JP Morgan Chase will reconsider and keep the program alive. Judging from all the chaos over there, it may be a right hand/left hand problem.

Posted by guest, Apr 07, 2008 12:48PM

@11:47, that is hilarious. Really are the bottom of the barrel at BSC, no one but themselves to blame. Hey Joey, not for nuthin but we should start trading mortgages.....

Posted by guest, Apr 07, 2008 1:00PM

"Uh...yes..oh!....uh...Mr. Lebowski is..uh.. "disabled"....yes....

Posted by guest, Apr 07, 2008 1:14PM

Greekorthodoxophilia? Love it. But what is it with this recurring story that Jamie Dimon's father & family spent Passovers at Sandy Weill's house? The source of the story is a non-fiction book about Sandy Weill, and the Dimons were just bit players at the time ...

Posted by guest, Apr 07, 2008 1:16PM

Perhaps they can all work for the Bush administration - the nation's largest employer of the 'mentally challenged'...

Flame away, but ya know it's true! And the truth hurts!

Posted by guest, Apr 07, 2008 1:22PM

@1:16 Since W was able to beat Al Gore and John Kerry what does that say about them? The truth hurts, doesn't it?

Posted by guest, Apr 07, 2008 2:08PM

OK, make that "unrefrigerated week-old souvlaki" and I'll go with ya on it...

Posted by guest, Apr 07, 2008 2:13PM

@1:22 - you're arguing that because the American people elected GWB twice, that makes them smart. I don't think there are many people on this blog that would agree that the American people are in general a smart bunch.

Posted by guest, Apr 07, 2008 2:26PM

You are right 2:13, ALL liberals are firm in the belief that they are the smartest ones and the rest of the masses are stupid slobs. Hence they take it upon themselves to create rules and regulations on how the slobs should live.

This then leads to the formation of a central committee of the Party, which then realizes that people are idiots hence they should not be allowed to chose who rules over them and sets the rules. So then the 'elites' decide to shut down all other parties and they elect themselves from amongst themselves - while the proles are given some stupid rhetoric to tame them.

Does that remind you of some countries and political institutions?

You clearly indicate what the country will end up as if liberals are given the reins. And then when you call the liberals communists, they get all riled up.

Posted by guest, Apr 07, 2008 2:27PM

@1:22

Considering 95% of the people in this country are basically retarded...it's the new normal!

This is only my opinion and I have no stats to back it up, but using the presidential election as a determinant of population intelligence is bad. I consider elections a measure of which party was better at manipulating the mindless masses. Only about 5% of the population has the intellect to wade through the garbage and accurately determine, without succumbing to the candidate marketing blitz, who can most effectively execute policy beneficial to their station in life.

Just one guy's opinion.

-Nom me

Posted by guest, Apr 07, 2008 2:30PM

Looks like 2:!3-esque liberal logic drove the Democratic party to set up the system of 'super-delegates', who would have the authority to override the popular votes.

But alas, now looks like they after all feel the super-delegates to vote as per the popular vote count as that is 'democratic' and according to 'people's wishes.' So why did they have it in the first place? When GWB with fewer overall votes liberals were all pissed. But then they furiously oppose any move to have California's electoral votes allocated by popular vote instead of en-masses.

So what exactly do liberals want? Popular representation (people's wishes) or elites deciding (people are dumb)??

Posted by guest, Apr 07, 2008 2:32PM

@1:22 Neither Al nor Johnny got people killed with stupidity. Shall I go on with fighting in Alabama versus Vietnam?

Posted by guest, Apr 07, 2008 2:32PM

I thought the Jews owned all the banks?

Yours -
Mel Gibson

Posted by guest, Apr 07, 2008 2:44PM

@2:23

I thought the Jews owned all the banks, SugarTits?

Yours -
Mel Gibson


Fixed

-Nom me

Posted by guest, Apr 07, 2008 2:45PM

Since 2000, Cayne has sold 2.37 million shares worth about $182.7 million, while Schwartz has sold more than one million shares for roughly $67.2 million.

Posted by guest, Apr 07, 2008 3:20PM

can we get rid of this "guest" idiot arguing with himself from 1:16 to 2:32. I promised myself never to use this argument, but if I cared about politics I would have joined the backoffice along with the guest.

Posted by guest, Apr 07, 2008 3:22PM

@3.20-- meet me in the bsc mens room so I can release some political rhetoric into you, and put words in your mouth

Posted by guest, Apr 07, 2008 3:31PM

@3:20 - I guess this would be a much better world if everyone agreed with you? Would it also be a better place if everyone was blond with blue eyes too?

Posted by guest, Apr 07, 2008 3:37PM

@3.31 if all chicks were blond/blue eyed and had huge tits, the world would be a better place

(if they swallowed for free, the world would be an awesome place!)

Posted by guest, Apr 07, 2008 3:39PM

Come on people, let's get back on topic. This thread is all about the retards populating BSC.

Posted by guest, Apr 07, 2008 3:53PM

Btw, Bess, that $29 B from the Fed to Bear Stearns was not technically "taxpayer money." It came from the Federal Reserve, which is self-funded through interest and service fees. There was no special Congressional appropriation. And not to put too fine a point on it, but the money was 100% collaterized by Bear Stearns assets chosen by BlackRock as agent for the Fed. The loan is for a ten year term at 2.5% interest. The Fed can sell the assets when the market recovers.

The taxpayer may be affected if in a decade or so, the Fed cannot recover 100% on the underlying assets. This will reduce the surplus in the Fed Reserve system so that there won't be extra money to pour over from the Fed to the U.S. Treasury. The Fed system has been so successful that it usually makes a contribution to the U.S. Treasury that would have to be made up for in some other way.

So far, no taxpayer has contributed a dime to the Bear Stearns/JP Morgan deal, and some people (including Ben Bernanke) think that the Fed may make money on the deal in the long run. Some of the deals trumpeted the loudest as tax-payer bail-outs in the press have turned out to be money-makers for the U.S., such as the money loaned to Mexico when the Mexican peso was devalued.

Not that I don't think that it was questionable to underwrite JP Morgan's acquisition in this way -- it was a big involuntary transfer of wealth from BSC shareholders to JP Morgan.

Posted by guest, Apr 07, 2008 3:58PM

Hey gang, Judge Judy here. Just heard Chuck Gasbagarumor report that JPM will cut half the BSC staff. WOW - is boy wonder on top of yet another piece of breaking news. Damn, this comes as a complete surprise to everyone. NOT. Chuck - change your diet from the cold cuts. Your breaking all wind and no news! Then CNBC let the dope tell us "Dees guys was tryin to get the Paulson ting done more faster. Dats cuz dey mights runs out of time". LOL Give me a fucking break. Long live FBN!

Posted by guest, Apr 07, 2008 4:03PM

LOL Too funny JJ.

Post Your Comment