"I Don't Have A Job"-- Your New Excuse For Not Putting Out?

Posted by guest, Apr 08, 2008 5:22PM

I believe sex drive is similiar to alcohol consumption....when times are bad, you drink a lot. When times are good, you drink a lot.

Posted by guest, Apr 08, 2008 5:29PM

......what happens to the ego when you realize it is just shifting money from one model to the next (ie. pyramid scheme), not your ivy league intellect that made all those profits last year....... and were they really profits? or just j. Skilling wet dreams?

how exactly do the banks anticipate replicating the returns of the 2000's now that the emperor has < zero clothes?

Posted by guest, Apr 08, 2008 5:46PM

If your social life is solidly attached to your employment, i.e. drinking after work with your counterparties and chasing your office's pussy or your counterparties' office pussy, you will find that you will not hump or drink as much when you are between jobs. You won't be in the mood. Oh...and don't expect the people with whom you traded hundreds of millions of dollars of derivatives to send you a Christmas card this year if you're still "out" and looking. You see, it hurts them to "transfer' your hard luck to themselves. But you know that. You did it to one of them last year.

-Sigmoid Freud

Posted by Lowly Assistant, Apr 08, 2008 5:54PM

Well put, Siggy.

Posted by guest, Apr 08, 2008 5:57PM

I don't know. The whole subject of being out of work makes me want to throw up.

Posted by guest, Apr 08, 2008 5:58PM

ok, but if your social life isn't attached to your employment but your self-worth is, what then, sig?

Posted by HAM05, Apr 08, 2008 6:08PM

the subject of being at work makes me want to throw up. in fact, i just vimmed a little.

Posted by guest, Apr 08, 2008 6:14PM

No good deed goes unpunished. So here is my good deed which I hope only draws small punishment. If you want to get back to work real quick, here's the rocket sled path: assuming you have done your resume' homework, (1) You will only contact by phone the president of the company with which you are trying to get an opportunity. (2) You will state that you know that company has a problem with (fill in blank) operations. If you've done your homework, you will know such a thing. (3) You will state in your communication, written or oral, that you can solve that problem and annually save/make their company (fill in blank) dollars/euros/clams, etc. You can do that and you know it. Thus, you will do what a headhunter does...meet with the president and find out what the problems are and then try to find the fix. Only you will be the "fix"! It works. Remember, no matter what anyone tells you, the president of a company has the most disposable time to listen to your pitch and the most empathy for your position. Use it.

Posted by Inquisitor, Apr 08, 2008 6:15PM

I would LOVE to be laid off. Free vacation in between jobs... it would only enhance my self-esteem. :)

Posted by guest, Apr 08, 2008 6:17PM

Even if I couldn't afford the viag pills anymore, I would still go rock solid reading BL's posts on this site.

Posted by guest, Apr 08, 2008 6:34PM

Dear @5:58....If I shot myself every time I lost money or a job I would look like a swiss cheese today. Lets say you are a Yankees fan. You travel to Boston wearing an NY cap and take a walking tour. Everyone you meet on the tour.. from priest to prostitute (if not together) ...calls you an asshole. Are you? Of course not. You are not going to let a bunch of Bosox fans make you miserable. No fucking way! After all, they are Bosox people for God's sake.

The financial community is the same way. Losses are part of the business. Everyone in the financial world will tell you that there is a risk of loss. It's in every prospectus, account papers and the like. You haven't failed. A "model" has failed. Because of that, you are now worth more to a new employer than you were to your former one. Quit beating yourself up and start pulling yourself up.

Posted by guest, Apr 08, 2008 6:36PM

I just can't see underwriting foolishness to this degree.

Posted by guest, Apr 08, 2008 6:45PM

I can't see writing "foolish underwear" to this degree.

Posted by guest, Apr 08, 2008 6:49PM

Cody Willard talks about dealbreaker in a really good post today, http://cody.blogs.foxbusiness.com/2008/04/07/of-pucks-dances-and-future-valuations/

Posted by guest, Apr 08, 2008 6:50PM

TRUE

Posted by Anal_yst, Apr 08, 2008 6:58PM

Editing comments now, eh?

Citi selling ~12BN of lev loans to BX/APOL/etc @ ~$0.90...interesting

Posted by guest, Apr 08, 2008 7:18PM

When I was single some of the greatest times in my life occurred after getting shot. You've got cash from severance and girls love that you have time to spend with them--you can head to Nantucket or Amsterdam whenever you'd like. The entire job thing was just an afterthought--unless it's your first time and your self worth/identity are tied to your job.

Posted by Capitalist Infidel, Apr 08, 2008 8:14PM

Long position on hand lotion...hahaha

Some of the best times are had after the worst; so I would recommend to all the BSC remnants out there to buy a bottle, maybe some party favors, go get hammered, and find some 'gina. Short-sell hookers.

Posted by guest, Apr 08, 2008 8:21PM

I had to turn in my stones upon termination. Only after a month and a half of bed rest did the president of a tiny bank give them back (not dissimilar to 6:14's approach)...

Posted by guest, Apr 09, 2008 12:53AM

Laid off today. Fingers and tongue are still in shape. Willing to work with Bess to see if sex drive is reduced.

Posted by guest, Apr 09, 2008 5:04AM

I have a job... and Im horny..yeah baby... and actually Im still a little drunk from last nights outing...

i just vomited in my mouth thinking of being laid off, that wouldnt work till my share options inrease in value a bit.

Posted by guest, Apr 09, 2008 7:33AM

I thought all of you bsc/jpm/leh dregs were secretly meeting under Grand Central every night to swap various body fluids.

Posted by guest, Apr 09, 2008 7:45AM

"Laid off (/soon to be laid off) men of Wall Street, what say you?"

Suck me, beautiful.

Posted by guest, Apr 09, 2008 8:34AM

Yeah, losing my job made me depressed, really not interested in chasing tail any more. If some chases me, so be it. I can be found on my bar stool drinking whatever is cheap and potent.

Posted by guest, Apr 09, 2008 9:40AM

What's saying that we don't?

Posted by guest, Apr 10, 2008 1:21AM

Lost my libido after losing my job.

Found out when I was making out in the middle of Broadway and W 70th and didn't feel a thing. That was scary.

Posted by guest, Apr 10, 2008 11:45AM

this is 100% total nonsense...

in 2001 i "left" the bulge, and joined a Euro IB that "dabbled" in corp. fin.

I was a VP and they handed out $350K for a 9-6 job, which for 2002 was fine, given zero or moving was the alternative.

It was a VIP lifestyle, firstclass to IMF meetings on Privatair, wimbeldon, Formula1, etc.

Well I went from dating one avg. jewish UES chick for 3 yrs at the bulge, to dating 9 women in one yr:

-all were 10+yrs younger
-3 were "models" of some sort: lad-magazine, greek wedding dancer, b-model for bikini calendar; rest were leggy babes. 4 I met in Europe and said "I have a pad in NYC, would you like to visit?" 100% are going to take that offer. [Best revenge is when youu are talking with the British Airways sales rep and she asks the age of your lady guest and you give a DOB in the 80s!!!]

-Re: my rap: standard answer I gave was: I am an international Banker....most hot women can't tell the difference between the mail room and board-room...

It was sorta amazing....when you have to leave the office at 6 (security locked the doors; a consulate from same country was in there), your brain just changes. You relax, and by 8 you are ready to go out from Tues-Sat, and actually have some rap beyond, i did 6 pitch books and hit clevaland and the twin cities...

Anyway, I would encouage all you studs to take advantage of this time, as your social life could be zero or 1000% better.

As a side note, I re-hit the bulge in 2004 and rode the gravy train back up. Yes, the babe siutation went to pot.

IB is great for $, not pussy.