Tensions grow high on the old pagan day celebration as we watch the headlines, wary of being caught up in a journalistic prank or three. It is not hard to be a skeptic, if you think about it. There have been some rather savvy pranks over the years, including the 1957 BBC program “Spaghetti trees,” purporting to show the hanging pasta harvested from trees, the space shuttle’s emergency diversion to Cumbernauld airport, Eminem’s free concert in the parking lot of an unaware super-store as announced on a local radio station (the DJ’s were arrested when a riotous crowd blamed the store), the “cancellation” of the Howard Stern show due to FCC pressure, the Buddhist baseball master Sidd Finch and his 168 mile per hour fastball, Coldplay’s decision to endorse the UK’s conservative party, the assassination of Bill Gates (Korean stock market lost 1.5% in the ensuing panic) and suchlike.
With a history like this, we are sharp-eyed today, looking for the next iffy story that might catch us unawares. Which will it be?
Bloomberg – Lehman Gains as $4 billion Share Sale Calms Investors
The New York Times – “Investors hoped that mortgage-related write-offs at UBS and Deutsche Bank could signal the last of Wall Street’s subprime woes.”
DealBook – Dimon’s Compensation Rose 5% at JP Morgan
SeekingAlpha – RIM, Mosaic Earnings Should Provide Upside Surprise
SeekingAlpha – IBM Suspended From Any New Federal Work
RealClearPolitics – The Dems Can Go Nine Innings
Or my personal favorite:
Wall Street Journal – Third Avenue Management: Uptick Rule Change Spoiled my Long Positions in CIT, MBIA, Ambac.
Did we miss any? Let us know in comments.
(Did we catch you with ours?)
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- Use the Bloomberg command
NH BLG_DEALBREAKER <GO>
to access Dealbreaker
looloolemon, no way that company beats earnings tomorrow, no way.
Boston Globe – McCain says record shows he’s not a hothead.
Dealbreaker to cease from re-hashing other journals news items?
anal – cant decide which is worse, the company itself or the people who actually buy their crap.
mouthbreathers are taking over the world.
@4:27 dude, seriously, get a life. if you don’t like it, don’t read it. and if you’re one of the ones who claims to only come here for the comments, then do that and STFU.
the people who buy lulumon crap are not mouthbreathers, i think you are confused and mixing up your groups of objectionable white people
My favorite was WSJ, Barrons, Bloomberg (sent out a full alert) marketwatch, CNN money all picked up the sentiment expressed by Doug Kaus in a letter this morning that “I have become so bullish that I have decided to convert my dedicated short funds into long-only partnerships.” It was an April Fools joke. However, all mainstream media covered it like it was real.
I personally thought this was the best damn joke I’ve seen in a while: http://bigpicture.typepad.com/comments/2008/04/internet-hoax-g.html
Julie Alexandria to go topless this afternoon to appease her horny male-dominate audience this April Fools Day! Her stock for today: RICK!
HAM, Anal: re LuLu: have you noticed that in the window of the store at 64/Bwy theres a nasty outfit for men, sort of a combo singlet thong thing.
Yea, looks like a wave of good news for and from fools. Write off billions more and issue billions of stock to dillute your owners and borrow billions more and the stock market will go through the roof. Good call dealbreaker. Hey, Man U won. That was no April’s fool.
Nothing wrong with hotties rocking out skin-tight outfits…its the fat slobs who think they can rock it that bother me.
Oh, and their CEO’s absurd claims, the insane valuation (ftm P/E of what 2x+ anyone remotely close in the industry), and the annoying “culture” they profess.
Anal: its not just tight. Its a wrestling singlet from the waist up, a thong below the waist. Besides Richard Simmons, what guy would wear that at Equinox?
@5:15
It sounds absolutely divine!
How can any conversation about mouthbreather clothing continue without a mention of CROX? I would still sell that dogshit at $17.50 as well as all the people who wear them.
@ 5:15 – “Anal: its not just tight.” Freudian slip?
-Nom me
http://www.wallstrip.com/
Julie, why did you show your boobs without me? Now look what the FCC has done to CBS AGAIN! First Janet, now you!
If anyone recorded Julie earlier from earlier today, please post the clips. Julie and her crew may have gotten fired from Wallstrip, but we’ll always have her mammories, err… memories.
hey, i actually like lululemon stuff.
but as they say, lululemon doesn’t muffin-top people, people’s inabilities to lay off that third slice of pizza muffin-top people.
http://www.wallstrip.com/home/
Doesn’t every firm have a 5:46??? Let me guess – Liberty or Regent University grad? Newt Gingrich is your hero?
Always good to know what’s going on with Jamie Dimon. I hope he enjoys that extra few millions.
About Lulu:
http://www.blogto.com/fashion_style/2008/03/lululemons_mansy_tickling_more_than_just_mula_bandhas/
–Calgary Schmooze
@ myself
Dogshit product/company CROX downgraded by analysts (which ones I don’t care) and trades down another $1.25 today.
My sac tingles anytime trashy fashion fads begin to collapse.
-Nom me