• 12 May 2008 at 11:42 AM
  • HSBC

Ban On Acronyms Gets Results

A lot of people are wondering this morning how HSBC was able to see a rise in first quarter profits, despite rising bad-debt charges in the U.S. and a sizable writedown in its investment banking arm. The most popular theory pins the gains to higher returns in Asia, the Middle East and Latin America. DealBreaker readers who have been paying attention know that the key to HSBC’s success is far more subtle: the elimination of acronyms. Who’s laughing at asinine corporate directives now?
Earlier: We Need To Make This Thing Work. What’s The Key To Making This Thing Work? NO. MORE. ACRONYMS. If I See Or Hear One Person Not Spelling/Saying The Whole Word Out, I Will Go Carnival-Freak Crazy On Your Ass. I Mean It, I’ll Scratch Your Eyes Out.
3rd UPDATE: HSBC 1Q Profit Ahead Of 1Q07 Despite US Impairments [CNN Money]

Comments (8)

  1. Posted by golden girl | May 12, 2008 at 11:54 AM

    Apropos of nothing, I’ll tell you what should be BANNED: that supremely annoying kid spinning the CNBC sign around to advertise for the Million Dollar Challenge. Seriously, that shit is KILLING me.

  2. Posted by mrpink | May 12, 2008 at 12:21 PM

    LOLOMGROFLMAO
    GCIB ROX!
    -mrp

  3. Posted by Anal_yst | May 12, 2008 at 12:40 PM

    Hittin the sauce a little early today, eh Pink?
    And by that, I mean I’m jealous, sigh…

  4. Posted by mrpink | May 12, 2008 at 12:58 PM

    Anal_yst:
    No, not yet.. Disciplined… Still working on my own stuff, researching, etc… Still waking up at 7, stopping at 4.. I’ll drink @ 4 :)
    -mrp

  5. Posted by guest | May 12, 2008 at 1:12 PM

    What??? You mean to say there are two “7s” during a day???
    The Forehead Slapper

  6. Posted by mrpink | May 12, 2008 at 1:15 PM

    It’s 5′o clock somewhere :)
    -mrp

  7. Posted by Anal_yst | May 12, 2008 at 1:19 PM

    Reminds me of a friend in “commercial real estate” (in quotes, since as far as I can tell she knows nothing about it, and never actually does any real “work”, i digress…), told me the other day alot of times someone’ll come around at 2pm with coffee mugs filled with jameson (no coffee), this, on like a random tuesday when “things are slow”…oh, to have such a job!

  8. Posted by guest | May 12, 2008 at 1:28 PM

    Commercial real estate is slow??? No way, I don’t believe it.
    Son of The Forehead Slapper

Leave a comment

You can log in with your account or comment as a guest below.