Posted by guest , May 01, 2008 4:28PM

um, no it doesn't, b/c CdM is may 5th.

Posted by guest , May 01, 2008 4:35PM

Thanks Pedro(aka dumbass) for the translation.

The point: who's going to go out and do upside down marguaritas if they're worried about getting shitcanned the next day.

Posted by guest , May 01, 2008 4:44PM

I do love getting shit canned at St. Barts

Posted by guest , May 01, 2008 4:58PM

Personally, I would assume every single employee would be out there tottering up if they knew the explosion would come the next day. I certainly would.

Posted by guest , May 01, 2008 5:50PM

This is a company that makes people apply for their own jobs. The only guarantee is that if you're (re)hired, it will be for less money.

Why don't they just send people off with a handshake and a severance check? Because the workers were never employees to begin with. They were "consultants" who worked for years and were never offered f-t jobs with benefits.

So, how do you get rid of all these people now? Offer them jobs, of course.

Posted by guest , May 01, 2008 6:24PM

Anyone know how heavily the Stamford CT location will be affected?

Posted by guest , May 01, 2008 6:45PM

Why on earth would Cinco de Mayo and Guy Fawkes Day be bigger in Switzerland than, say, Easter Sunday? Just curious. But I suspect a sly joke.

UBS sounds like a great place to (not) be employed.

Posted by guest , May 01, 2008 6:49PM

UBS severance packages to be paid in Swiss Cake Rolls and Swiss Miss Hot Chocolate.

-NSD

Posted by guest , May 01, 2008 8:01PM

"Anyone know how heavily the Stamford CT location will be affected?"

I'm hoping heavily. It would be a welcome relief to see the entire Stamford office shut down. Globally, we're pretty much sick of the arrogance and incompetence from Stamford employees. Good riddance I say. Sadly, I doubt the cuts will go that far.

Posted by guest , May 01, 2008 8:43PM

very large contingency of Mexican ex-pats in Switzerland.

Guy Fawkes, not so sure.

Posted by guest , May 01, 2008 10:32PM

May 6 it is....2600 from the IB getting the boot.

Posted by guest , May 01, 2008 11:39PM

Are you implying that the firings are contradictory to the company's philanthropic spirit? I'll have you know that UBS has graciously offered terminated employees a chance to stay on in their current roles as unpaid volunteers.

Posted by guest , May 02, 2008 9:36AM

anyone know when/how many UBS is letting go? I hear it's next tues/wed and would like to be prepared if it's me. what are the rumors you are hearing and who are you hearing them from?

Posted by guest , May 02, 2008 9:42AM

mole

Posted by guest , May 02, 2008 9:42AM

can you read? they're letting going of 8,000. been widely reported everywhere, including...this story.

Posted by guest , May 02, 2008 9:46AM

but that # UBS wide. What about just in the invesment bank?

Posted by guest , May 02, 2008 9:48AM

It's contingent 8:43. CONTINGENT. A contingency is an incidental, something dependent upon some other event or thing, and how attorneys get paid.

A contingent is any representative group composing an assemblage.

You are probably one of those college educated douche-bagues who says an "amount" of people.

Is it just me? Am I the only one who has Dictionary / Thesaurus.com?

Jeez.

Posted by guest , May 02, 2008 9:50AM

What do you call a busload of UBS employees driving off a cliff?

Posted by guest , May 02, 2008 9:57AM

do you think each manager already knows who's going to get cut?

Posted by guest , May 02, 2008 10:05AM

beat reuters

http://www.nytimes.com/reuters/business/business-ubs-jobs.html?dlbk

Posted by guest , May 02, 2008 10:07AM

I am in IT support, will i be affected?

Posted by guest , May 02, 2008 11:58AM

Yes, IT support will be affected. You will wet your bed even more often than before and your parents will stop buying you Cocoa Pebbles cereal.

~LexSteelz

Posted by guest , May 02, 2008 12:02PM

Leave him alone Lex. Heez gonna find a job in about five mins. Its more likely you're gonna be back at the 'rents, wettin yr bed.

Posted by guest , May 02, 2008 1:32PM

UBS must have some extra cash laying around as they rented out the entire upstairs of Rosa Mexicanan in Lincoln center for a cinquo de mayo party yesterda.

Posted by guest , May 02, 2008 1:51PM

1:32 Please... Let us know when they're renting out Per Se. Also, was it for a customer event? Or to motivate sales people? If so, the cost of some burritos and tequilas was a good investment.

Posted by guest , May 03, 2008 1:12AM

Sigh. 26 posts and no Thadeus

Posted by guest , May 03, 2008 1:56PM

Guessing cuts at I-Bank will be in 10-20%. But, that # will vary widely depending on department (corp fin., FI, Equities).

Posted by guest , May 03, 2008 7:37PM

Managers know exactly who will be cut -- who do you think has the pain of making the choice? If you haven't noticed all the meetings in recent weeks then you must working in the basement.

And yes, IT FTEs will be cut... the new CDF and talk of lateral career opportunities didn't actually apply to positions *within* UBS :)