Hedge fund gone belly up? Firm bleeding red ink out of every orifice with no end in sight? Haven’t slept in days? Apartment you bought from Tony Randall just not feeling like home, owing in part to a lack of “Odd Couple” memorabilia? (You were promised a lock of Jack Klugman’s hair!) IT’S ALL GOOD.
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NH BLG_DEALBREAKER <GO>
to access Dealbreaker
Pretty sure Vik just emailed me this morning concerning my very important checking account at Citi. The guy is really slumming it these days.
He’s wide awake, unlike the NYMEX traders who work for him.
That’s a pretty nice suit. Nice work Vik.
That’s a pretty nice suit. Nice work Vik.
You know, I thought that in the NY Magazine Zoe Cruz article, he really came off the worst of anyone mentioned.
for reelz blondie? 3 buttons? he may as well join shannon sharpe and his absurd sartorial choices
I envy the curvature of his desk
kung fu pandit
I think I just saw Vik on the streets of Mumbai serving Erin Burnett some street curry.
Funny, mktmkr – I wanted to comment on that segment myself. The fried potato on a bun actually sound quite delicious.
Yeah I got an email from him regarding my credit card. It was all fluff.
what’s matter with 3 buttons? These are the tough questions Vik now faces.
Hey marketmaker,
Be careful…That must have been a false Vik phishing your account because it is clear from this pic that he doesn’t have a pc at his desk.
(that screen over on the left is one of those furniture store props that is hollow and weighs about 4oz..)
He’s smiling because you keep setting th bar lower and lower.
Seriously Ham. I like the pinstripes and the pink tie. It’s a suit that would look much better on a tall, built hot guy.
Seriously Ham. I like the pinstripes and the pink tie. It’s a suit that would look much better on a tall, built hot guy.
Citi Never Sleeps With Anyone Attractive.
Seriously Ham. I like the pinstripes and the pink tie. It’s a suit that would look much better on a tall, built hot guy.
His tie is too wrinkly. Methinks he’s been cheating and actually caught a few winks in that thing. Maybe curled up in the fetal position under that ovum-shaped desk?
3 buttons is fine. Shannon Sharpe and his ilk wear 4 button suits, which are just atrocious.
@Suits – I concur. 4 button suits are just gross.
what’s up with all the wood paneling? so 80′s…the tie is way too wrinkled, jacket sleeves too long, and who would keep a monitor so far to the left of where you would sit (I don’t see the little pull out shelf for the keyboard – or it’s hidden really well) so I agree with @11:12 – good call. where is GAnalYst in all this fashion talk? and what gives with all the double posting today?
How was the dinner Cluzo?
Keshawn and Michael Irvin apparently contacted Vik(ram) about sharing fashion tips
good times, harold ford is even more slick in person (he introduced fred smith – fedex ceo). met a guy who taught at columbia…from 1931 – 1981 (talk about tenure). too bad the comment board got all out of whack, I would have suggested bull and bear last night. is coady still hanging out there?
Sounds like you had a stimulating evening. Shamefully, I’ve never been to Bull & Bear.
Is it possible that Vik doesnt have a computer or Bloom on his desk?
the winner of the award this year was Yon Goicoechea, a 23 year old law student in venezuela who stood up to hugo chavez. his acceptance speech was actually pretty moving. and I quote: “you should come to my country and see our women” (yes, way out of context), he had the crowd rolling. then a bunch of his cohorts from law school came up on stage chanting something in spanish. so it wasn’t just a bunch of gray hairs.
@Cluzo – Haha “see our women” that’s fab. How does one score an invite to this thing? Was it black tie?
That background looks completely CGId to anyone else? And agree with Cluzo re:cheap veneer paneling on the desk.
Thant’s not a monitor on the left, it’s a TV. No Computer in sight, maybe the cheap desk has a monitor lift?
Finally, 3-button is the limit, but 2 has been the sweet spot for a couple years. I see the 3 button 3 piece coming back though. As has been said, 4 buttons is for back-office.
@bb – no mystery to it, you just have to give. then you get an invitation to buy a really expensive dinner. yes, black tie.
@bsd – great call, we must of have been delirious to think that there would actually be a computer/monitor in that office.
@BSD – Back office doesn’t wear suits. They have “denim days” for crying out loud.
@Cluzo – Yeah not so much. I’ll wait for next year and find someone to take me.
@12:14pm – That’s just wrong.
@12:14
I don’t think anyone here is amused by your comments. Gawker just called, they want you back.
The anonymous guest in the peaked white cap and white gown is back with his burning cross. Get back in your time warp machine, @12:14pm.
Cluzo, I was going to mention that the presence of Harold Ford as a speaker at the Cato Institute dinner went to prove the falsity of the comment made the other day that you would be one of the few black guests at dinner. Pretty classy company.
@cc – I wouldn’t jump to any conclusions based on the presence of HF. the number of people in the room with ample melanin was underwhelming (and only one – woman – serving, lest any a$$clowns think otherwise). so it wasn’t just me and uncle clarence (as the poster hypothesized yesterday), but it didn’t resemble an al sharpton rally either (those tix didn’t come cheap).
cluz–for a guy who goes golfing, and fancy dinners with important folks, you sure spend a lot of time posting here.
@BlndBanker: Please give the comments a second to pass through the DB system. I know youre super anxious to lay your smack down, but the triple-posts time and time again are getting mildly tiresome. Also, Bull & Bear is a great place to blackout post-work. Heckling Cody is fun too, but far too easy.
@all: what was said at 12:14…it looks like it was taken down.
@1:30pm. What difference does it make to you? Blondebanker asked Cluzo several questions, and he responded. Cluzo was nice enough to respond to a friendly comment I made. There are lots of people regularly posting here, lots of back and forth. So what? STFU.
@onetwo – I swear I only hit post once. I mean don’t get me wrong, I’m crazy eager to share but I’m not retarded. I will look into the Bull & Bear. The girls I go out with aren’t in finance and tend to want to go to less banker-y type places.
@1.41–you racist!! I make one comment and you jump on me. I bet you wish all black women were called “Mammi”.
@onetwo – someone decided to post some not so flattering remarks. it looks like the folks at db decided that they were so off color that it needed to taken out with the rest of the trash.
@cc – you’re correct, some people send emails and IM all day, others would rather post on boards like this – email police won’t get you here, but other commenters will
Blnd,
Cody is there with the dimes from Rick’s. How much less banker-y do you want? The Patriot? Well, I guess that depends on the day…..
@1:51pm – My friends are in marketing and stuff. They like to go to places like Local and Metro 53 and the like. But the crowds there have gotten increasingly ugly and sketchball so I’m searching out new places.
Blnde,
I was just kidding. Ugly in size (*sshole to bellybutton) or physically diseased looking individuals somehow getting in? Sketchball? It’s NYC…you can find the sketchy side of any bar/club – if you look hard enough.
Ugly in the face, stature, overall appearance – just a homely looking crowd all around. Too unattractive in fact, to get anywhere near the bellybutton to asshole region. There’s always going to be sketchy dudes hanging around but I wanted to go somewhere where they at least don’t look it.
Can we focus here, on this sh!tful day, on the important stuff, like where happy hour is?
Oh yes where is HH tonight?
Metro 53? sounds more like fake blonde bank teller to me
Do all of you regular & frequent db posters feel so secure in your low-level jobs that you continue BullShitting one another in the face of the current employment situation?
As things often go, the crap at the bottom doesn’t float to the top. Instead, it gets flushed out when a blowdown occurs.
@2:41pm – Whatever dude. There’s a dance floor there and my friends and I like to dance.
@2:42 – wtf are you talking about? Employment situation? The current “employment situation” is perfect for DB frivolity. If you’re employed then life is probably slow right now, so distrctions are good. If you’re fearful about getting fired, why not blow off steam around the interweb? If you’re already fired then you’ve got plenty of time to kill…and there are only so many rub and tugs in this city to blow your severence on.
@anal_yst – keep me in the loop about HH. I need a drink…or five.
@2:42 – not everyone on db has a “low-level” job, and even analyst roles on the street make enough scratch after the first year to go out “in style” when they want. Moreover, employment status is only a serious issue for underperformers at a couple bulges, BSC/JPM aside.
That being said – it’s absurd to assume that someone only goes to a less upscale spot because they can’t afford the models and bottles lifestyle. It took me a couple years of hitting up every hot club until I realized that I ultimately have way more fun at a dive bar where you can get drunk, dance and not worry about a thing.
@bsd – how right you are…after spending countless dollars at suite 16 (remember that place) and marqee, I have found it’s much more fun to go “down market” in the bar scene. am I getting old?
@onetwo – hh won’t be so much fun in the rain (hurts turnout)…I’ll suggest johny utah’s on monday night – perhaps db will sponsor a bull riding contest.
(2)@3:02,
Two more bullshit comments from two more regular low-level boasters/posters. “Go out in style”. HaHaHa.
@3:11
And yet you are posting multiple times. Go piss up a rope. You seem to have to time.
@BSD – Amen. If only the crowd at Metro was cute again, I’d go there more.
@3:11pm – If you’re so high level and awesome, why are you wasting time with us scrubs? Stop hating.
Dear cluzo,
i’d have to disgree. Drinks are fun in the rain, in a drain, up a rope, with the pope, filled with glee, or misery.
signed,
banker seuss
Cluzo, rainy day happy hours are the best, NO LINES (at the bar, i mean)…
More beer for the rest of us that aren’t afraid of water
@girl – ha, ha! but you forgot a line: drinks are best when they’re free…c’mon carney, you have heard the masses, they want to drink and they want to drink tonight. make it happen.
@Cluzzo – Yea, i know what you mean about this narsty weather keeping attendance low, but it’s pretty irrational to not get wasted when it’s raining. I mean, foregone opportunity cost of blacking out is dramatically lower when it rains (ie, since the supply of anything fun outdoors is restrained, you have fewer possible replacements for “blacking out”, thus raising it’s relative value).
So let’s black out anyways.
Cluzo, rainy day happy hours are the best, NO LINES (at the bar, i mean)…
More beer for the rest of us that aren’t afraid of water
@Cluzzo – Yea, i know what you mean about this narsty weather keeping attendance low, but it’s pretty irrational to not get wasted when it’s raining. I mean, foregone opportunity cost of blacking out is dramatically lower when it rains (ie, since the supply of anything fun outdoors is restrained, you have fewer possible replacements for “blacking out”, thus raising it’s relative value).
So let’s black out anyways.
Wait – wtf? I got a really nice email this morning from Vikram. You mean to say I’m not the only customer he cares about? He’s losing sleep over other people? I’m shocked, just shocked! It was such a warm personal message too.
best guest
guest@3:14,
I do have time. I’m retired. I did “go out in style when I wanted to”, unlike you early gen-y & late gen-x twerps who think that fabrication = truth. HaHaHa.
Your real tests will come when you manage your own portfolios. How is that going for you goons? Do you even have portfolios, or did you “piss up” that “models & bottles lifestyle” rope too often? HaHaHa.
once again girl wins the threads…
(HaHaHa = fucktard)
@3:29
A retiree posting on DB “A wall street tabloid”. Now who looks foolish?! You have lots of time to sit on your porch and (attempt) to take cracks at “those dern whippersnappers!!!”
guest@3:29
You are so full of shit. Unless, by retired, you mean recently let go from your busboy position at your neighborhood diner. The only portfolio you run, or have ever run, has been your lame-ass cnbc challenge portfolio. Get a life and leave everyone alone.
If you are as great as you say you are, own up and prove it to everyone somehow…
HH = CFA study session. Let’s hear it for the “winners.”
guest@3:29
You are so full of shit. Unless, by retired, you mean recently let go from your busboy position at your neighborhood diner. The only portfolio you run, or have ever run, has been your lame-ass cnbc challenge portfolio. Get a life and leave everyone alone.
If you are as great as you say you are, own up and prove it to everyone somehow…
@3:29
Why are you here? You retired waste of space. Should you be washing down a Viagra with your ensure and then cleaning out your depends? Let me preempt your “I am retired at 39″ BS response right now. If you were, you wouldn’t be posting on this site. You be f*cking your former prom queen g/f (that’s girlfriend you old sh*t) or wife on the beach at Turtle Island. Instead you are heckling the current Wall St chillins. You have no answer, or you will and it will try and validate whatever the f*ck you are doing. But make no mistake….you are a nobody. Never were and never will be.
guest@3:40/@3:43,
Johnny, Did I strike a tender nerve somewhere? Double-posting for effect, are we?
“Prove it to everyone…somehow”. HaHaHa, again
@3:29 Ad hominem attacks between anonymous commenters on blogs are the epitome of cretinism. If you really are retired, then perhaps it’s time to give Dr. K a call as your lack of comprehension – obvious in how you grossly took every quote out of context, belies extreme senility.
Then again, from your inner city grade-school level writing style its rather obvious you’re just a back-office piker or an outsourced IT geek trying to hypocritically live out his fantasy of being above even the lowliest trader’s assistants.
Ding, ding, ding!!
4:00pm, finally. What a painful day. Time to hit the bar. Have fun processing tickets, my favorite “retiree”…!!
I think it’s time to pull out the gem…
“I don’t lose money, I print it. Now go back to clearing my trades.”
Ok, back to HAPPY HOUR!
Suggestions?
Go to Bull & Bear – they have hookers after 11Pm, so its the only way most of you will get laid
hahahaha
I got nothing. What do you think Analyst?
actually, the pros are there before 11. hahaha = *sswipe.
@3:45 et al,
“Heckling the current Wall St chillins” is such an easy thing to do.
You have no foundation. No moral compass. No proper upbringing. No discipline. Permissiveness and “all-about-me” have been with you since birth.
Your dipshit “text-message” writing style is typical of today’s batch of “know-nothings”.
My “Inner-city, grade-school level writing style”?? HaHaHa.
Anal_yst and I will be at Bar 119 circa 6:30. Free jaeger bombs (jaeger bombs? jaeger bombs!) to anyone who finds us.
And for all those Patrick Bateman wannabes out there:
Ratings & Review
Appeal Decor Service Cost
16 9 15 $8
“Rockers and bikers” rub shoulders with “college” kids psyched for shows at The Fillmore at this Union Square “dive” where “cheap and grungy” vibes plus “great tunes” equal a “good time all around”; then again, it’s “kind of a hole” and “snarky pool mavens” seem to corner the table on cue.
This has to be the Vietnam guy from earlier this week. All the generational speak. Baby Killer! have super w/e (does that drive you nuts loser?) all!
guest@440=”go get shitfaced”=winner? HaHaHa.
@onetwo – may join you and anal_yst if the cable guy comes on the early end of the 6 – 9 window. seriously, what would your clients say if you gave them a 3 hour window for a meeting start time? something is wrong with this picture.
BSD@3:56,
Is that your picture on your profile? HaHaHa.
BSD=Bull-Shitting Drone
Cluzo
You mean the cable guy said he’ll be there somewhere between 6pm 2nite and 9pm 3 wednesdays from now?
For real though, what do you need him for, just hook it up yourself (or convince someone more handy to do it for you, if thats not your cup o’ tea)
BSD@3:56,
Is that your picture on your profile? HaHaHa.
BSD=Bull-Shitting Drone
is @3:43 the only one doing CFA? Too bad, cause its a really useful program. Don’t want to ruin happy hour for the rest of you, but remember the story of the squirrel and the walnuts.
Cluzo
You mean the cable guy said he’ll be there somewhere between 6pm 2nite and 9pm 3 wednesdays from now?
For real though, what do you need him for, just hook it up yourself (or convince someone more handy to do it for you, if thats not your cup o’ tea)
cluzo – throw me an email (on the profile) if you’re heading down. The Jaeger bombs promise is in full effect.
@5:06 Or tell him when he arrives to tell your doorman to call the handyman to let him in. This is not Kansas. NY is famous for its service economy. Lots of emigrants, illegal and otherwise, doing things for other people in return for $.
Anal_yst@5:06,
cluzo is arithmetically & technically challenged. HaHaHa.
Did I miss anything today? That pic yesterday of porked up Tanner turned me into a bullemic. I’ve been in the bathroom all day with my fingers down my throat, vomiting every piece of food I eat. GAnalYst
GAnalYst,
didn’t miss much besides the usual crowd of accidental retarded visitors who stumbled here from (gawker/hitleryouth/AARP/etc) websites.
We be goin drinking after work (see above)
@anal_yst: timewarner has issues with my internet. I get a better signal from my neighbor’s wireless than I do from the stupid “high” speed cable. if I could have done it myself, trust me I would have.
@onetwo: will shoot you an email.
@5:14: you found me out, dang. I just can’t hide anything from these smart db “guest” posters. you’re so clever! you must have been the guy that gave me my double cheeseburger today. I knew you were one smart cookie when I saw your picture on the wall as “employee of the month”.
I could use a drink. The vomit story was made up, but I was otherwise very busy. Another time though. Got plans. Have a great weekend all. GAnalYst
cluzo – throw me an email (on the profile) if you’re heading down. The Jaeger bombs promise is in full effect.
@ 5:10. CFA studying is driving me to drink.
cluzo@5:19PM,
No expensive lunch today for a high-end player like you? What happened?
BTW, “guy that gave” should read “guy who gave”.
Ivy_League education? HaHaHa.
You’re all off drinking and you left me alone with the psycho heckler? I actually finished a hectic day just a few minutes ago. Oh well, I got a laugh from girl’s Dr. Seuss post and Anal_yst’s reference to the commenters who wander in from the “gawker/hitleryouth/AARP/etc.” website.
@cc – sorry we left you high and dry. you missed a good time. onetwo, anal_lyst and girl came out for drinks which facilitated a lively discussion. from al sharpton to all the “guest” posters, we covered most bases. next time we’ll get you and GAnalYst out. just make sure to bring some cash, I can only play daddy warbucks for so long ( ; despite the “player” title I’ve been given, I like to keep a low profile, ha, ha!
Cluzo – Just got in from a house party and I am checking email and unwinding. I appreciate the invitation! Due to location issues, hard to do drinks, but maybe some time in the future. I was commenting for a long time as a “guest” but my conscience got the better of me after some anonymous negative stuff surfaced, and there was an appeal to people to register. Glad people had a good time, sounds like fun! Don’t worry, I always check my cash supply before I go out.
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