• 25 Jun 2008 at 12:07 PM

And Yet, This Is Still Preferable To Ace Greenberg Giving Us Intimate Details About Barbara Walters

By Bess Levin

warren_buffett.jpgYet again, Warren Buffett has gone the fuck out of his way to awkwardly marry aberrant sex fetish with folksy business wisdom. In response to a question about what makes people want to sell their companies to him, Buffet said:

You can sell it to Berkshire, and we’ll put it in the Metropolitan Museum; it’ll have a wing all by itself; it’ll be there forever. Or you can sell it to some porn shop operator, and he’ll take the painting and he’ll make the boobs a little bigger and he’ll stick it up in the window, and some other guy will come along in a raincoat, and he’ll buy it.


Listen, we’re all for a. fucking and b. analogies but time and time again Buffett bends over backwards to just get the sex reference in without even really illuminating the actual point and the best part is he doesn’t give a rat’s ass. He might as well have answered, “You know, it would be like putting a huge pair of cans on a mouse in a lab. Sure, they’re fun to play with but at the end of the day, you’re still fucking a rodent.” But since he’s old, set in his ways, and not going to change any time soon, let’s place bets on when WB will drop the pretense and just start showing up to interviews with Becky Quick (but thinking about Liz Claman) in a bathrobe, answering questions with only one hand showing. We’re going to go with soon.
Related: Barbara Walters Does Not Want To Talk About The Sex She Had With Alan Greenspan, Ace Greenberg 40 Years Ago
Warren Buffett Says Sell to Me, Not `Porn Shop,’ as Growth Dips [Bloomberg]

Comments (39)

  1. 1
    Posted by guest | June 25, 2008 at 12:08 PM

    Bess you crack me up

  2. 2
    Posted by guest | June 25, 2008 at 12:11 PM

    best WB post this year

  3. 3
    Posted by BSD | June 25, 2008 at 12:12 PM

    I’m just waiting on Claman’s Walters-eqsque tell-all. The buffet of Buffet chapter will be scrumptious.

  4. 4
    Posted by guest | June 25, 2008 at 12:16 PM

    BESS. I THINK I LOVE YOU

  5. 5
    Posted by guest | June 25, 2008 at 12:17 PM

    Warren is a dirty old man.
    This guy seems to always pepper his “folksy” chats with some sort of sexual innuendo, but since he claims not to own a computer, we can be sure he doesn’t spend his afternoons porn surfing and beating off at his desk.

  6. 6
    Posted by guest | June 25, 2008 at 12:23 PM

    I think he was referring to mr crab hands as the porn shop operator.

  7. 7
    Posted by mktmkr | June 25, 2008 at 12:28 PM

    Why does WB look like a little kid put in time out in that picture?

  8. 8
    Posted by guest | June 25, 2008 at 12:28 PM

    WB has massive Omaha orgies

  9. 9
    Posted by guest | June 25, 2008 at 12:28 PM

    @ WB
    Play on player!
    -Nominate me

  10. 10
    Posted by guest | June 25, 2008 at 12:29 PM

    WB has massive Omaha orgies

  11. 11
    Posted by lemmerdeur | June 25, 2008 at 12:32 PM

    Hide the livestock, the Mormons are coming.

  12. 12
    Posted by guest | June 25, 2008 at 12:50 PM

    http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/world/us_and_americas/article4083455.ece
    Buffett was the guy in the shadows at these parties….

  13. 13
    Posted by guest | June 25, 2008 at 12:52 PM

    For liberal Viagra mainlining Democrats like WB, it is ultimately and always about s*e*x.

  14. 14
    Posted by girl | June 25, 2008 at 1:11 PM

    How insightful @12:52, I suppose for right wing Republicans it is ultimately and always about something more lofty, like Jesus. Or something.

  15. 15
    Posted by a dead horse | June 25, 2008 at 1:27 PM

    Girl, if you don’t like Jesus, you don’t like America, and if you don’t like America then you can giiiiiiiiit oooooooout
    America: God’s Country

  16. 16
    Posted by Anal_yst | June 25, 2008 at 1:35 PM

    Riiiiiighhhhtttt

  17. 17
    Posted by guest | June 25, 2008 at 1:38 PM

    Thank God for the Liberal Founding Fathers of this nation of Bush would be King.
    Oh, and God Bless Warren Buffett.

  18. 18
    Posted by guest | June 25, 2008 at 1:39 PM

    I didn’t say America was “God’s country”. You guys did.
    ~God

  19. 19
    Posted by guest | June 25, 2008 at 1:42 PM

    omg…the rednecks figured out how to use computers!!! Time to invent a new medium.

  20. 20
    Posted by guest | June 25, 2008 at 1:53 PM

    how ugly could bess levin be while still being bang-able. I go 4. very generous.

  21. 21
    Posted by To The Hilt | June 25, 2008 at 1:55 PM

    SOLD!!!! to the porn shop operator with the highest price.

  22. 22
    Posted by guest | June 25, 2008 at 1:56 PM

    @1:53–yup. and i hope this doesn’t blow your load, but in reality: 8.

  23. 23
    Posted by guest | June 25, 2008 at 1:59 PM

    1:56 – are you saying she’s an 8 or 8 is the lowest you’d go?

  24. 24
    Posted by guest | June 25, 2008 at 2:02 PM

    @159– the former. but posts like this would make me go to a 1.

  25. 25
    Posted by guest | June 25, 2008 at 2:03 PM

    i heard she’s 8 feet tall and shoots balls of fire from her ass. with is braggable.

  26. 26
    Posted by guest | June 25, 2008 at 2:07 PM

    question: how low would you go for carney?

  27. 27
    Posted by guest | June 25, 2008 at 2:15 PM

    Kevin Depew at Minyanville wrote an article titled the “Pornacle of Omaha” on this. It also has his hilarious “Tips” from Warren Buffett to individual investors.
    http://www.minyanville.com/articles/index.php?a=17725

  28. 28
    Posted by guest | June 25, 2008 at 2:20 PM

    i think Artie Help is spot on!Mayo makes everything taste better.Bravo Artie a man who knows what he likes.Glen Progy

  29. 29
    Posted by blndebnker | June 25, 2008 at 2:24 PM

    I’d go as low as 5 on Carney

  30. 30
    Posted by guest | June 25, 2008 at 2:28 PM

    As we used to say in the USN: “I wouldn’t fuck Carney with your dick.”
    On the other hand, Bess….
    Kudos, young lady, this post goes on your highlight reel.
    – Commodities Desk

  31. 31
    Posted by Anal_yst | June 25, 2008 at 2:44 PM

    wtf is up with the mayo cartel spamming every post today?

  32. 32
    Posted by guest | June 25, 2008 at 3:05 PM

    “How insightful @12:52, I suppose for right wing Republicans it is ultimately and always about something more lofty, like Jesus. Or something.”
    Or boys.

  33. 33
    Posted by guest | June 25, 2008 at 3:17 PM

    Judging by the pic – WB either enjoys a)sitting in elevators or b)he has many leather-bound books and his apartment smells of rich mahogany

  34. 34
    Posted by Finnegan | June 25, 2008 at 3:39 PM

    Jesus is okay. WB looks like he has to pee.

  35. 35
    Posted by jerrydill | June 25, 2008 at 4:37 PM

    Oh what a way with words. He can definitely get people to listen with his analogies. Funny article!

  36. 36
    Posted by guest | June 25, 2008 at 4:51 PM

    His reasoning why people sell to Berkshire goes against a core investment belief; take your emotions out of it.
    Why would anyone not take the highest bid?

  37. 37
    Posted by guest | June 25, 2008 at 9:13 PM

    Buffett is the luckiest man alive to have Liz Claman next to him all the time. Okay let me just say she gets the best stuff out of him but she is MAJOR DREAM MATERIAL, THIS GIRL IS SIZZLING, SMOKIN’ HOT. I can barely hear the words coming out of those lips, those emerald eyes, that face… what did you say, Warren???
    –Moneyman

  38. 38
    Posted by guest | June 25, 2008 at 9:51 PM

    Yep, tell me about it. Liz got Warren to say “boobs” during the interview on Fox today. My entire trading floor stops dead in its tracks when Liz is on Fox Business. It’s an added bonus if Buffett’s there but either way, we’ll take her. throw talk of boobs into the mix and forget it, all trades are off

  39. 39
    Posted by Charlie | March 10, 2010 at 7:25 PM

    Wow. dealbreakjer.com deserves an zeard.

Leave a comment

You can log in with your account or comment as a guest below.

   or