Posted by guest , Jul 16, 2008 3:11PM

how are associates doing?

Posted by guest , Jul 16, 2008 3:31PM

@american bandersnatch - they all look Indian to me, and I should know because I am one.

Posted by guest , Jul 16, 2008 3:35PM

@american bandersnatch -
If you want the legit ones, check out http://gurmat.com/index.html

Posted by guest , Jul 16, 2008 3:36PM

@american bandersnatch -
If you want the legit ones, check out http://gurmat.com/index.html or my personal favorite: www.sikhmatrimonials.com

Posted by guest , Jul 16, 2008 3:37PM

@3:35 - Never, ever marry a Sikh.

Posted by guest , Jul 16, 2008 3:44PM

*COX SAYS 'NAKED' SHORTING IS A SOURCE OF ABUSE, NOT ILLEGAL

*COX SAYS SHORT-SALE ORDER IS 'PROPHYLACTIC' MEASURE BY SEC

seriously?

Posted by guest , Jul 16, 2008 3:48PM

also,

*COX SAYS SEC TRYING TO REMOVE 'TOOLS OF MISCHIEF' FROM MARKET

- 3:44

Posted by guest , Jul 16, 2008 3:50PM

ROFLMAO THEY SAID COX

Posted by guest , Jul 16, 2008 3:50PM

Guest@3:09pm...

Good point. The clowns should be glad they got anything at all. MER should have cut those bonus numbers by 60%. The clowns wouldn't quit; they have no where to go.

Goons on Wall St are the only workers in the world who expect a large bonus from a company that is damn near in the tank.

Comment to others...

A bonus is for a job well done and for exceeding expectations, not for showing up at the office and playing with oneself. I know you all think you do a lot. All that questionable, but highly-accurate analysis is definitely meaningful, and all those shitty prospectuses you drool over and write up are awfully important too. Trouble is, it's been all bullshit for years.

How many of those "top performers" are in that massive risk-management dept?

I look forward to much more government regulation on an out-of-control, reckless, unrestrained and bloated cesspool that is Wall St.

A $110k 'bonus'? Hahaha. Vik's judgement should be examined.

Laugh if you want, but that's my take on the MER bonus numbers. I guess you can tell that I'm really a big fan of Wall St.

The Guy from Delaware

Posted by guest , Jul 16, 2008 3:51PM

This euro douche is making alot of sense

Posted by guest , Jul 16, 2008 3:56PM

I meant Thain, not Vik.

The Guy from Delaware

Posted by guest , Jul 16, 2008 3:57PM

do they have wing nights at bon chon?

Posted by guest , Jul 16, 2008 3:57PM

Guy From Delaware, when you go to the pool don't forget to bring a towel.

-Towelie

Posted by guest , Jul 16, 2008 4:01PM

TGFD,

Vik doesn't run MER. IBK had a good year for MER, it was FICC that f*cked up (structured). And 110k, plus 110k bonus at 90 hours a week is $47 bucks an hour....or almost $98K if you work a 40 hour week like you - you ignorant slob. Nevermind, I forgot you take home your pay in government cheese and food stamps. Asshole.

Posted by guest , Jul 16, 2008 4:03PM

Bloomberg repurchases stake in his company from Mer.

Charlie G does it again.

Posted by guest , Jul 16, 2008 4:05PM

COX SAYS COX. REPEATS.

Posted by guest , Jul 16, 2008 4:09PM

This is a pittance compared to my 20% returns in my flagship fund

"I dont make money I print it"

Bitches

Posted by guest , Jul 16, 2008 4:14PM

BITCHES LOVE COX.

Posted by guest , Jul 16, 2008 4:16PM

Yes TGFD
Because we all know much more govenment regulation from the out-of-control, reckless, unrestrained and bloated cesspool that is WASHINGTON DC is the answer.

Posted by guest , Jul 16, 2008 4:37PM

@3:50 - In IB bonus is standard compensation (no one works for their base). A good year is a big bonus and a bad year is a small bonus relative to a standard bonus expectation - which ain't zero unless you want to jack everyone's base sky high. Banking did fine, they get their cut. A high variable comp to total comp ratio is to incentivise people and generally it works across this and many other industries. Just look at every company's management, no one works for their base, it's all incentive options.

Posted by guest , Jul 16, 2008 4:53PM

Clown@4:01pm...

I corrected the "Vik" error at 3:56.

I love it the way you clowns get so worked up when someone from outside your sphere of ideas comes in and challenges your belief system.

BTW, how is that govt cheese? Is it good?

Towelie@3:57pm... Thanks for the reminder. I'm leaving shortly.

Guest@4:16pm...

Hahaha. I like it. Touche indeed. You're a clever guy.

The guy from Delaware

Posted by guest , Jul 16, 2008 5:01PM

TGFD
clever girl - thank you

Guest @ 4:16pm

Posted by guest , Jul 16, 2008 5:01PM

TGFD

clever girl

Guest @ 4:16pm

Posted by guest , Jul 16, 2008 5:06PM

Guest@4:37pm...

Thank you for your post.

"Just look at every company's management...it's all incentive options."

You're right about "management" compensation at most companies; however, management doesn't look for much in the way of bonuses when the company is nearly in the tank.

Also, we're not talking "management" here. We're talking about rank-and-file goons on Wall St demanding bonuses from their employers just because the goons didn't get fired and made it past the 1, 2 or 3-year marks while said employer is teetering on the edge.

Only on Wall St. Thank you for your clarification though.

The Guy from Delaware

Posted by guest , Jul 16, 2008 5:07PM

HAHAHA the dude lives in delaware!

Posted by guest , Jul 16, 2008 5:13PM

@ 4:01 - You're a clown if you actually think you work all those 90 hours. Bankers love to talk about the hours they pull, but they sit on their ass doing nothing for most of the day. Leave banking if you don’t think you’re getting paid enough; there are plenty of smarter people in India waiting to take your job anyway. Enough with the complaints / entitlement.

Posted by guest , Jul 16, 2008 5:14PM

TGFD, on behalf of all "rank and file Wall Street goons," shut up. And while you're sporting your Lilly Pulitzer swim trunks and having all the "chicks" admiring your 60 year old body (in your dreams), try to remember you posted that you have an adoring wife to whom you are devoted. I know it's hard to keep all the stories straight ...

Posted by guest , Jul 16, 2008 5:31PM

TGFD is clearly a poor, bitter person who expresses his jealousy over the fact that 23 years olds earn a far higher salary that he does by posting "educated" comments on DB. I, for one, enjoy his posts. No matter how rough things seem in the banking industry, it's alway nice to hear the bitter rants from TGFD and the other poors of the world. Just remember TGFD, every time you enlighten us by challenging the belief system with your wise insights, there are those of us who laughing at how much it must suck to be you.

Posted by guest , Jul 16, 2008 5:32PM

TGFD - tell us how much skin you got in the game?
As far as chick's admiring your body - all 60 year olds have "moobs".No woman admires male brests so some advice, get a "Bro" and keep your t-shirt. Hopefully that 55 to 65 year old demogrphic that you so enjoy will appreciate you efforts to keep yourself covered.
PS - self reporting on how hot you are just makes us all think that the only action you are actually getting is from your non arthritic hand.

Posted by guest , Jul 16, 2008 5:33PM

Wall St Goon@5:14pm...

Fiesty, aren't we today? Your belief system was challenged, and "shut up" tells me that your offended.

BTW, I wouldn't trade this soon-to-be 60 year old body for yours. I'm quite satisfied with it. Those several chicks who made the comment about my Lillys were 12, 16, 30's(2), 40's(1), and 50's(1). WTF do you know?

Also, my beloved wife and I always go to the pool together.

Get some new material. It's unfortunate that you can't find a chick who isn't either a pole dancer, a whore, a bar fly, or a gold digger.

The Guy from Delaware

Posted by guest , Jul 16, 2008 5:36PM

what freakshow spends all their time on an investment banking-related message board when they neither work in nor understand the industry?

Posted by guest , Jul 16, 2008 5:51PM

TGFD should be allowed to guest edit for a day.

Posted by guest , Jul 16, 2008 5:55PM

@5:36pm

does your boss and/or compliance dept. know that you're "stealing" by posting on the same blog?

now go back and fix your spreadsheets.

Posted by guest , Jul 16, 2008 5:58PM

@5:06 - I suggest you lobby to have base salary reflect the current base + standard bonus structure (less 10-20% which can be bonused back for good performance + if the firm did well). I think what you will find a whole lot less incentive out there.

Let's be very straight - this and most of life is a game of "chase the cheeze". If there's a guarantee of being well fed and only a tiny morsel at the end - people don't run fast or work hard to get to through the maze. While I do think that Wall Street and Ibank comp is out of line (leverage, oligopoly, and naive customer maintained) - I do not suffer from any illusion that the higher proportion of variable comp to base, the greater the incentive, sense of ownership and ultimate reward to the total business endevour.

Maybe you feel otherwise. In the case of the total firm - you will lose that well functioning IBank and those employees if you don't pay them for the quality work they did and reputationally, others will also hear of it. You have to maintain your business units for a going concern otherwise you are truly sunk. Now if the firm is truly blown up so badly that they can't pay good performing employees who didn't cause the issues....you are finished. And this is what they are trying not to have happen.

Posted by guest , Jul 16, 2008 6:05PM

How about TGFD Vs EP dual hosts for a day?

Posted by guest , Jul 16, 2008 6:19PM

freakshow@5:36pm...

I've got "skin in the game", that's why. I've also learned a lot from you turds. Believe it or not.

"moobs", "23-yo", & others...

I do discuss my physical appearance in my "Treatise on Women", an essay that I'm working on currently. I will say that people (especially chicks) have difficulty believing that I'll be 60 later this year. I've always looked very young for someone my age. Skin, hair and condition have a lot to do with it.

I don't care how much you make "23-yo". I wouldn't trade places with you. What else do you have going for you? A woman boss, maybe, who makes you wear panties on your head all day?

Never said I was "hot". DB posters have implied that.

Any way, I'm glad that you enjoy my visits. I learn something about finance, and you clowns get a few laughs.

BTW, next time I see that clown Sen. Biden at the local drug store, I'll ask him to set me up with some of that Govt cheese. He lives right around the next corner from me, and he's often about most weekends.

It's already getting late; I may not make it to the pool tonite. Regards.

The Guy from Delaware

Posted by guest , Jul 16, 2008 6:25PM

90 hours a week for 40 bucks an hour?

lol

Posted by guest , Jul 16, 2008 6:33PM

I think my wife left some mayo on my chin..shoot, thats not mayo.

The Guy from Delaware

Posted by guest , Jul 16, 2008 6:40PM

TGFD. I said "shut up" because it represented my deepest feelings about your posts. As to bragging about your supposed attractiveness, I well remember your post about "chicks of all ages" coming on to you. And I don't recall anyone asking how you looked in swim trunks. As your own alter ego TOGFD pointed out, way too much information. BTW, a twelve year old is a child. You're dangerous as well as batty.

Posted by guest , Jul 16, 2008 6:44PM

Guest@6:33PM...

I'm flattered that you're trying to immitate my style by using my moniker. Your entry is for shit though.

The Guy from Delaware

Posted by guest , Jul 16, 2008 7:28PM

Guest@6:40pm...

Are you the poster I called "Androgeny" back in June?

I ask that you consider not having "deepest feelings" about any posts on DB. Most of the banter that goes on here seems rather playful to me anymore. I try not to get too worked up about the 'hate mail' I occasionally get. I don't hate anyone here, and I hope that I didn't "grind your gears" too much either.

The thing about the "chicks of all ages coming on to me" does not mean that I pursue them in return. I believe I said that I stopped that shit back in 1985 when I met my wife.

"All ages" includes 12-year old chicks from time to time. I'm never rude to them, nor do I ever make them feel uneasy by saying something that might embarrass them. Does a comment about me and the Lillys rank as a "come-on" from a 12-yr old? I don't think a girl that age is far enough along in life to be an effective seductress. She's probably not sure of what she's doing or saying. That's my opinion. I'm certainly flattered by the attention though, but that's as far as I go.

These things are discussed in my "Treatise on Women" which I mentioned earlier.

Hope I've addressed your concerns. I'm going offline for tonite.

The Guy from Delaware

Posted by guest , Jul 16, 2008 7:52PM

Maybe I'm the only one intrigued by this, but The Guy from Deleware first posted on this thread at 3:50PM. That means he has been staring at this page (probably hitting refresh every 15 seconds) for 4 hours straight. Someone needs to interview this guy. Call me crazy, but I think he could be a bigger loser than Tim Sykes.

Posted by guest , Jul 16, 2008 10:24PM

haha...im still dying over here...the guy lives in delaware!!!

Posted by guest , Jul 16, 2008 10:45PM

@7:52 Where does Tim Sykes live? How do even know they're different people? I find my split-personality theory of Tim Sykes/TGFD more plausible than anyone being a bigger loser than Timmy.

Posted by guest , Jul 16, 2008 11:15PM

what's the scoop outside of ibk?

Posted by guest , Jul 16, 2008 11:31PM

TGFD is the only interesting thing I've seen on DB for the month of July...

Posts have generally been boring, nonexistent, or plain stupid. A couple of Carney's posts are good, but DB just really does not cut it for me lately.

Maybe it's because work has been busy, and the financials have been tanking so quickly that they were more interesting than the snide remarks about bonuses. And who is so interested in a mid-yr bonus when they get laid off by end of year? I dunno, people just don't understand how serious this crap is. Reputation of many of the iBanks, comm banks, regional banks, and the US gov and USD are in serious question. There will be no magic wand that's waved where we jump back to early 2007!

I dunno, right now it just seems incredibly petty to always make remarks about Tim Sykes or TGFD or whomever. Are you obsessed about appearances and "looking stupid" because you'd rather not face reality? I'm sorry...

dantheman

Posted by guest , Jul 16, 2008 11:41PM

@dan"theman"...the fact that you defend tim sykes and TGFD invalidates anything you have to say. also, the post have been "nonexistent"? are you fucking retarded? what' this thing here you're commenting on? idiot.

Posted by guest , Jul 17, 2008 12:20AM

@dantheman...the majority of the posters here use it as a break from work, not to mention a source of gossip. The fact that the shit is hitting the fan is all the more reason to blow off steam by fucking around with Timmy and TGFD. So go the fuck away already.

Posted by guest , Jul 17, 2008 1:59AM

save those bonuses boys and girls many of you you will likely be out of a job in 2009.

Posted by guest , Jul 17, 2008 8:04AM

This is supposed to be fun!

Posted by guest , Jul 17, 2008 2:39PM

dantheman, you're a homo

Posted by guest , Jul 17, 2008 2:58PM

@5:13. Where in that post did I complain? I will work my long hours and take home my (over)pay thank you very much. Everyone outside that sphere is entitled to think what they want...