• 10 Jul 2008 at 1:14 PM

Fishy: Merrill Lynch Delays Bonuses

By John Carney

Analysts at Merrill Lynch were supposed to receive bonus numbers on Tuesday but jerk off and/or cry day has been moved to Friday, without no reason offered for the hold up. Did management need a few extra days to line the birdcage with newspaper, in anticipation of a repeat performance of this?

Comments (17)

  1. 1
    Posted by guest | July 10, 2008 at 2:26 PM

    ML 1st year top bucket bonus = 85K
    Confirmed.

  2. 2
    Posted by guest | July 10, 2008 at 2:32 PM

    85K for 1st Tier? Thats pretty good during these ‘trying times’
    I’d take that, mos def – beats the Hizz-ell outta Wachovia, LEH, and BoA

  3. 3
    Posted by guest | July 10, 2008 at 2:38 PM

    @2:26– BS

  4. 4
    Posted by guest | July 10, 2008 at 2:44 PM

    maybe it’s 85K in Herbie Bucks as a tribute to ML management in the late 90s?

  5. 5
    Posted by guest | July 10, 2008 at 2:45 PM

    The delay is so they can figure out severance packages.

  6. 6
    Posted by guest | July 10, 2008 at 3:05 PM

    ML 1st year top bucket bonus = 45K
    Confirmed.

  7. 7
    Posted by guest | July 10, 2008 at 3:22 PM

    ML management need a few extra days to get more detail on Goldman’s brilliant “Accelerated Analyst Programme”.

  8. 8
    Posted by guest | July 10, 2008 at 4:17 PM

    ML 1st year top bucket bonus = 0k
    Confirmed.

  9. 9
    Posted by guest | July 10, 2008 at 4:26 PM

    ML 1st year top bucket bonus:
    A bottle of laxative and a piece of paper fancied into a bucket.
    Confirmed.

  10. 10
    Posted by guest | July 10, 2008 at 4:58 PM

    ML 1st year top bucket bonus:
    is a set of steak knives
    You’re fucking fired

  11. 11
    Posted by guest | July 10, 2008 at 6:26 PM

    Merrill’s major problem is/was Stan O’Neal. He risked the whole company on the CDS mess to leverage his bonus. The board sure was asleep at the wheel on that one. Come on, booking 10 years forward earnings on an investment should of raised a bunch of red flags.
    MER-retired thank goodness!

  12. 12
    Posted by guest | July 11, 2008 at 3:40 AM

    Yea, and considering no other firm is in trouble anywhere, Stan should be singled out for blame. Yuh huh.

  13. 13
    Posted by guest | July 11, 2008 at 8:32 AM

    Dear Yuh huh,
    Luckily I retired in ’05, so this is not about a dislike of Merrill. I have great feelings toward the firm, but O’Neal was a problem for everyone. The climate he set up and his envy of Goldman lead him to encourage large bets on the CDS investments. We all learned on day one to diversify, diversify, diversify. Since this thread is about MER, I kept the comments on them. O’Neal was the problem. He did not want any checks and balances placed on him.

  14. 14
    Posted by guest | July 14, 2008 at 3:09 PM

    Bone=usss U gota B kidding???!!!If they are waiting may I suggest a room in 773H and hang-up-side down.

  15. 15
    Posted by guest | July 14, 2008 at 3:21 PM

    lol
    the average wall street bonus this year will be keeping your job.

  16. 16
    Posted by guest | July 14, 2008 at 3:23 PM

    the really funny part is all these same jerk-offs were buying $1700 per square foot condos all over the city with the last couple of bonuses.
    oooooof.

  17. 17
    Posted by guest | July 16, 2008 at 11:12 PM

    is this ibanking or all?

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