• 03 Jul 2008 at 1:08 PM

Write-Offs: 07.03.08

$$$ The Upside Of Being Downsized [Portfolio]
$$$ Israel told the court he tried to commit suicide by swallowing pills two days ago. “I thought it was better to do myself in than to turn myself in.”
I ate the balance of my fentanyl patches because I thought it was better to do myself in than to turn myself in,” Israel said. “I woke up battered and bruised and I realized God didn’t want me to do that and I turned myself in.”
When that attempt failed however, Israel said he thought God had wanted him to surrender. This and his mother’s pleas, made him leave the campground where he had been hiding out in a mobile home and ride his blue scooter to the nearest police station in Southwick, Massachusetts, officials have said. [CNBC]
$$$ Why They Should String Samuel Israel Up On Wall Street With A Note Saying “Fraud Isn’t Painless” [Timothy Sykes]
$$$ Newspapers [WallStrip]

Comments (40)

  1. Posted by guest | July 3, 2008 at 1:21 PM

    Bessy, what ur up2 tonight?

  2. Posted by guest | July 3, 2008 at 1:27 PM

    Dropping loads all over Julie’s face…aaaaaahhhhhh!
    -Nick Manning

  3. Posted by AJ | July 3, 2008 at 1:38 PM

    I’m confused by Tim’s rant. Wasn’t his hedge fund a fraud? Sure, it wasn’t the scale of Israel’s but it seemed pretty fake to me.
    Tim will shortly reply with another rant about how the SEC oppresses the little guy and destroyed his fund…

  4. Posted by Anal_yst | July 3, 2008 at 1:43 PM

    Haven’t read sykes post (if the last one was any indication it’d be a painful experience due to his writing style), but Israel is/was a scumbag, I mean he coulda made millions a year just putting all his funds in treasuries just off the management fees (and woulda squarely outperformed many funds), guy really is a schmuck (isreal, that is)

  5. Posted by guest | July 3, 2008 at 1:45 PM

    Give me one good reason why I shouldn’t believe him.

  6. Posted by guest | July 3, 2008 at 1:57 PM

    Samuel Isreal III is a convicted criminal who ran a huge Ponzi scheme. He probably has complex psychological issues which drove him to do it, plus all of the other insane things he did. Riding a scooter to turn himself in after trying to overdose on fentanyl is just one more pathetic variation of his nuttiness. It’s too bad he’s such a screwball, but my sympathies are entirely with the people he conned.
    Some people have to be segregated from society. Sam Israel is one of those people.

  7. Posted by Anal_yst | July 3, 2008 at 1:59 PM

    If ya’ll hadn’t seen it yet, William Bennett of former Refco infamy sentenced to 16 years…best part of it, from his statements: “”Despite the best of intentions, I made an unacceptable and appalling error,”
    Bennett said. “I crossed a line that should not have been crossed.”

  8. Posted by guest | July 3, 2008 at 2:10 PM

    I’m so tired of reading stories about the silver lining of losing a job at Bear Stearns.
    The guy Portfolio interviewed took a buy-out package at 62. He was in HR, for heaven’s sake. He went on to join an on-going business, an executive placement firm. Big deal.
    How about some stories about the people in their twenties, out of work and living in their ridiculously expensive rental apartments and riddled with college loans, with scant hope of finding jobs before their severance runs out?
    Or some older support staffers who lost their savings and retirement packages?
    Losing one’s job in the Bear Stearns collapse did not lead in most cases to a long, glamorous vacation.

  9. Posted by guest | July 3, 2008 at 2:10 PM

    1pm write offs. love it.

  10. Posted by guest | July 3, 2008 at 2:20 PM

    How many years now have we been hearing about the death of newspapers? Maybe papers will die when we can effectively read the online news while riding in a crowded subway, or while taking a dump, or at the beach, etc. And don’t give me that blackberry/handheld bullshit. The online news can’t replace picking up The Times on a Sunday and lying on the couch for half the day.

  11. Posted by TimothySykes | July 3, 2008 at 2:30 PM

    AJ are you fucken kidding me saying my fund was a fraud? Fuck you and the SEC–it was my fault for getting away from my core trading strategy, but in no way did I ever make up #s/falsify documents, rip investors off…in fact, most of my investors broke even, the rest are down 20% (you forget we had 2.5 solid years before the 35% drawodwn–and I do intend on making them whole…just wait
    PS I love this fucken market, die cockroaches die, my traffic, sales and short selling strategy are all booming, love you incompetent fucks!

  12. Posted by guest | July 3, 2008 at 2:39 PM

    Timothy Sykes- you smell of poor self-esteem. Sound like a soar loser, too.

  13. Posted by Anal_yst | July 3, 2008 at 2:54 PM

    Glad to hear you’re doing well Tim, and that you’re not bitter or spiteful or anything

  14. Posted by AJ | July 3, 2008 at 2:59 PM

    Well, I can check “provoke Tim Sykes” off of my to-do list… now what else do I need to do before the weekend…

  15. Posted by guest | July 3, 2008 at 3:06 PM

    funny shit AJ

  16. Posted by big r | July 3, 2008 at 3:06 PM

    i need a Rum Punch Revolution soon please

  17. Posted by Anal_yst | July 3, 2008 at 3:10 PM

    ugh no alcohol please (until tomorrow at least), god damn redbull vodkas leave you feeling like you went skiing all night, :-(

  18. Posted by guest | July 3, 2008 at 3:13 PM

    Y, but what was the connection to Pinnacle AM?

  19. Posted by guest | July 3, 2008 at 3:14 PM

    Y, but what was the connection to Pinnacle AM?

  20. Posted by MuniShe | July 3, 2008 at 3:14 PM

    Need a good strong cocktail to feel better after a night like that…

  21. Posted by big r | July 3, 2008 at 3:27 PM

    RPR isnt so much alcohol as it is now a way of life.
    step up anal_yst. our founding fathers didnt risk life and limb for you to waste it away w a hangover.

  22. Posted by big r | July 3, 2008 at 3:30 PM

    any notice that ’2008 Bonus Payout’ post comment counter is actually going down on the Most Commented as the actual number of comments go up? the post has >400 comments and the tally is now

  23. Posted by TimothySykes | July 3, 2008 at 3:41 PM

    Not angry or spiteful at all, just use idiot comments as fuel to my already supercharged determination fire…not gonna stop til all u lil bitches understand my strategy

  24. Posted by Anal_yst | July 3, 2008 at 3:55 PM

    Power to ya tim, nothing speaks like success, honestly i’d much rather you let your success speak for itself, but do what ya gotta do brosepher

  25. Posted by guest | July 3, 2008 at 4:12 PM

    Kevin Davis at MF Global heading to jail for this it seems

  26. Posted by mrpink | July 3, 2008 at 4:55 PM

    Uhoh
    *FED PARES ESTIMATED VALUE OF BEAR STEARNS ASSETS TO $28.9 BLN
    *FED ESTIMATE OF BEAR PORTFOLIO DOWN FROM $30 BLN IN MARCH
    By Scott Lanman
    July 3 (Bloomberg) — The Federal Reserve said the portfolio
    of Bear Stearns Cos. assets it accepted as part of the firm’s
    takeover by JPMorgan Chase & Co. is now worth $28.9 billion, down
    from the $30 billion estimated in March.
    The central bank cut the “fair value” of the assets as of
    June 26, the Fed said today in Washington. The Fed loaned $28.8
    billion last week to a company it formed to purchase the
    investments, which as of mid-March included debt backed by
    mortgages and other items JPMorgan deemed too risky to take on.
    The Fed gave the fair-value estimate of Maiden Lane LLC’s
    holdings as part of its weekly report on its balance sheet today.
    The central bank will provide quarterly updates on the
    portfolio’s value. Maiden Lane is being counted on the balance
    sheet of the New York Fed, and was named after a Manhattan street
    that borders the bank.
    JPMorgan is absorbing the first $1.15 billion of any losses
    realized on the holdings.
    Separately in today’s report, the Fed said direct loans
    to securities firms slid in the past week while discount-window
    borrowing by commercial banks rose.
    The Fed’s loans to Wall Street bond dealers dropped by
    $4.4 billion to a daily average of $1.7 billion in the week
    ended July 2. Funds provided through the so-called discount
    window for commercial banks rose by $159 million to a daily
    average of $14.9 billion.
    For related news:
    Stories on the Fed: NI FED
    Top finance stories: TOP FIN

  27. Posted by guest | July 3, 2008 at 5:05 PM

    Pinnacle re Kellman ripoff

  28. Posted by guest | July 3, 2008 at 5:59 PM

    To be fair, -3.7% in Maiden Lane LLC is probably substantially better than the S&P or your favorite Master of the Universe did over that same time period.

  29. Posted by diablo | July 3, 2008 at 6:27 PM

    Put Maiden Lane’s junk in the open market and see what you get.

  30. Posted by guest | July 3, 2008 at 6:34 PM

    Isn’t Maiden Lane way downtown? Bear Stearns was on Madison in midtown.

  31. Posted by guest | July 3, 2008 at 8:12 PM

    FYI, Julie, you might not have heard but Rush Limbaugh just got a $400M contract and six-figure sign-on bonus, so terrestrial radio isn’t exactly HURTING! Howard Stern also had a $500M contact for a similar time-frame, so I suspect you would do well to look at that industry before writing it off so soon.

  32. Posted by Anonymous | July 3, 2008 at 8:37 PM

    Maiden Lane is adjacent to the NY Fed, I believe.

  33. Posted by Anal_yst | July 3, 2008 at 8:52 PM

    @ 6:34
    Did you read the article bro?
    “Maiden Lane is being counted on the balance sheet of the New York Fed, and was named after a Manhattan street that borders the bank.”
    libbalaa timmmayyy

  34. Posted by guest | July 4, 2008 at 12:39 AM

    NEW CONTEST IDEA:
    This is a 3 day contest. For 3 days, the participant (intern) can only eat mayo. Only mayo. At the end of the 3 days, if successful, he/she gets a cash reward. If he/she throws up, some increment of the cash reward is deducted per throw up. Only liquid allowed: water, and only if the water is mixed with mayo.

  35. Posted by NSD | July 4, 2008 at 3:55 AM

    Granted, I’m hammered like MC right now, but i’d like to take the opportunity to wish all the regulars a merry 4th.
    Carney – sure, it aint the big leagues like your brother, but keep on fighting the good fight.
    Bess – your rapier whit keeps us all drooling. please dont run off with Preston from the Vineyard this weekend. given my own experience, i know extended time in tortola can be enticing, but please dont trade us in for jersey trash.
    Anal_yst – where would we all be without you cutting insight? I love 1-2 knockout, but I still cant figure out how you have so much time to post. I’m on the sidelines and cant produce the same volume as you do. God bless you.
    Mr. P. – sure, its Chicago, but I know that there is some quality bears at U-Chicago just looking for some fresh east coast meat.
    Girl – where have you been lately? I’ve missed your leftist leanings disguised as centrist pandering.
    Blndbnrk – sure, A-rod may have a great ass but if he’s sharing it with a hag like Madonna, there is no hope for the rest of you.
    Timmay! – as much as it pains me to say, you’ve got spunk and that has to be admired.
    TGFD – Please don’t ever come back.
    TOGFD – go fuck yourself.
    Interns – I know its a delicate balance walking the line between sarcasm and journalistic integrity, but please realize that everyone in this industry takes themselves way too seriously. The bottom line is that 50% of people are below average, and the majority are only marginally better, so feel free to fire away at will.
    Now if you’ll excuse me, I have a Patron bottle to climb back into.

  36. Posted by NSD | July 4, 2008 at 3:56 AM

    Granted, I’m hammered like MC right now, but i’d like to take the opportunity to wish all the regulars a merry 4th.
    Carney – sure, it aint the big leagues like your brother, but keep on fighting the good fight.
    Bess – your rapier whit keeps us all drooling. please dont run off with Preston from the Vineyard this weekend. given my own experience, i know extended time in tortola can be enticing, but please dont trade us in for jersey trash.
    Anal_yst – where would we all be without you cutting insight? I love 1-2 knockout, but I still cant figure out how you have so much time to post. I’m on the sidelines and cant produce the same volume as you do. God bless you.
    Mr. P. – sure, its Chicago, but I know that there is some quality bears at U-Chicago just looking for some fresh east coast meat.
    Girl – where have you been lately? I’ve missed your leftist leanings disguised as centrist pandering.
    Blndbnrk – sure, A-rod may have a great ass but if he’s sharing it with a hag like Madonna, there is no hope for the rest of you.
    Timmay! – as much as it pains me to say, you’ve got spunk and that has to be admired.
    TGFD – Please don’t ever come back.
    TOGFD – go fuck yourself.
    Interns – I know its a delicate balance walking the line between sarcasm and journalistic integrity, but please realize that everyone in this industry takes themselves way too seriously. The bottom line is that 50% of people are below average, and the majority are only marginally better, so feel free to fire away at will.
    Now if you’ll excuse me, I have a Patron bottle to climb back into.

  37. Posted by guest | July 4, 2008 at 6:41 PM

    God I want to fuck her

  38. Posted by guest | July 5, 2008 at 1:44 PM

    NSD = asswipe.
    T_ _ _ D (Stealth Mode.)

  39. Posted by mrpink | July 6, 2008 at 4:19 PM

    ROFL NSD
    Thanks man… I’m nursing a hangover on this lovely Sunday myself, but I got about 40 beers still in the fridge (and a jar of mayo) with my name on it. Yee haw!
    -mrp

  40. Posted by Anal_yst | July 6, 2008 at 9:53 PM

    Thanks NSD, lets just say that unfortunately (or fortunately, depending on the definition of the word you’re using), I’ve been doing more “writing” than I have Anal_yzing the past few months…trying to make moves (in this great job market, yea real smart anal) so I’m not necessarily as dedicated to my present gig as I could be, meh

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