August 2008

  • News

    Write-Offs: 08.29.08

    $$$ Move to the other City [TBP] $$$ Timothy Sykes wrote his book on how he made his millions. Have you read it and what did you think of it? Who the fuck is Timothy Sykes? [WSF] $$$ Who needs a job? [craigslist] $$$ GD [WS]

    / Aug 29, 2008 at 3:35 PM
  • News

    Who Does The Best Research On Wall Street?

    New York Times business columnist Joe Nocera is unambiguous about his pick. Although Lehman has been the number one rated equity research shop (again, according to Institutional Investor), that just shows how flawed such ratings are. Everybody on Wall Street knows that Sanford Bernstein does by far the best equity research on the Street. It […]

    / Aug 29, 2008 at 1:39 PM
  • politics

    Sarah Palin: Short Oil

    So it turns out that John McCain picked Tina Fey Alaska governor Sarah Palin as his running mate. “Sarah Palin” is probably the most searched for name on the internet right now. In the minutes after news of her selection spread, popular websites like the Drudge Report went down. The reason for this is relatively […]

    / Aug 29, 2008 at 12:33 PM
  • News

    Lehman Brothers: Now Hiring

    Anyone need a job? You’d think the matter of canning 1,500 employees yesterday would’ve meant LEH not being up for much in the way of new hires for a while but you’d think wrong. They are back in the saddle and eager to have you and yours, Thursday afternoon’s gutting having created more than enough […]

    / Aug 29, 2008 at 11:29 AM
  • News

    Things That We Imagine Would Hurt

    The application of a bat wing. Hearing Pauly Shore telling you to get your life together. Having the last 18 months’ losses amount to 25 percent of your profits for the last 36 years. Merrill Losses Wipe Away Long Time Profits [FT]

    / Aug 29, 2008 at 10:51 AM
  • DealBreaker Policy Forum

    Q&A on The Veepstakes: The Race to Be America’s Number Two

    No American parent has ever looked at their son or daughter and said, “You know, I hope you one day end up being Vice President”. And yet, for all the lack of glamour the vice presidency has in the public mind, speculation over who will be chosen by a presidential candidate to be a running […]

    / Aug 29, 2008 at 9:00 AM
  • News

    Opening Bell: 8.29.08

    PartyGaming poker slowdown prompts downgrades (Reuters) This year’s slowdown in Las Vegas casinos was easy to see coming: Casinos aren’t really gambling houses anymore, they’re resorts, and resorts are vulnerable to economic cycles. But maybe people are, wait for it, in a less gambling mood. PartyGaming, the European online casino, says poker is soft. As […]

    / Aug 29, 2008 at 7:30 AM
  • News

    Write-Offs: 08.28.08

    $$$ Virgin Airlines Offers “Entourage Experience” For Closeted Junior Investment [PSI] $$$ Is The Long Arm of the Crab Extending to Overland Waste? [LoSC] $$$ Russian Roulette [NYP]

    / Aug 28, 2008 at 5:02 PM
  • News

    How Many Layoffs at Lehman?

    Reuters has now chimed in on the Lehman Brothers layoff rumors, saying 1,200 folks will lose their jobs. This puts them right between the New York Times estimate of 1,500 and the Bloomberg story putting the number at 1,000. (Also, this is weird: the Reuters story is timestamped 8:53 PM but it’s up now.)

    / Aug 28, 2008 at 4:40 PM
  • News

    Damn It Feels Good: The Video

    Have you picked up your copy of “Damn It Feels Good To Be A Banker?” It’s the book by Amit Chatwani, who is better known as the proprietor of the Leveraged Sellout blog. A couple of weeks back we ran an excerpt of the book, which is written in the voice of an egomaniacal banker […]

    / Aug 28, 2008 at 3:31 PM
  • News

    The Greatest Copycat Story Of All Time

    A San-Fransisco based hedge fund manager inspired by Goldman senior exec-cum-landscape architect Mark Spilker’s arbitrary and unilateral decision last year to cut down neighbor Jim Chanos’s shrubs is going downtown. Derek Webb, who runs quant shop Web Capital Management, was found guilty of vandalism for taking it upon himself to trim the trees at a […]

    / Aug 28, 2008 at 2:52 PM
  • Apple, Bloomberg, Steve Jobs

    Steve Jobs Is Dead Still Alive

    Relax. Steve Jobs is not dead even though you might have read his obituary yesterday on Bloomberg. The financial news service was updating its obituary on Jobs and accidentally published it on its wires. “It was momentarily posted on the external wire, in error, and immediately deleted (within thirty seconds),” a spokeswoman for Bloomberg told […]

    / Aug 28, 2008 at 2:51 PM
  • Layoffs, Lehman

    Lehman To Cut 1000 1500 Jobs

    For the last two weeks we’ve been hearing rumors of layoffs at Lehman. Last week people at Lehman were saying that layoffs were expected to come this week, before the Labor Day holiday. Now Bloomberg is reporting that “people familiar with the matter” estimate that Lehman will cut as many as 1,000 jobs. The good […]

    / Aug 28, 2008 at 2:19 PM
  • News

    Citi Will Return To Profitability One Chafed Ass At A Time

    Speaking of reasons you should asked to be fired: it wasn’t included in the recent treatise on how a ban on color copies will make up for zillions in losses, but the paper at Citi’s 390 Greenwich Street “mysteriously went from went from double to single ply last week.” Not to give Vikram any ideas […]

    / Aug 28, 2008 at 12:40 PM
  • News

    Speaking Of LAME Excuses To Fire You

    According to a well-caffeinated incoming analyst at Bearpont Morgan Chase, Jamie Dimon’s henchmen in HR fired at least a handful of new hires for falling asleep during training to make up for last year’s overhiring.

    / Aug 28, 2008 at 12:26 PM
  • News

    1-2 Joins ‘Large’ In Welfare Line

    Dealbreaker commenter 1-2 has been fired from his job at a gilded bulge bracket, for his side gig as the proprietor of the 1-2 Knockout blog. Unsolicited advice to all: call in sick, and don’t give them a reason to fire you. Related: Citi To Return To Profitability One Fired Blogger At A Time

    / Aug 28, 2008 at 11:20 AM
  • News

    Some Day A Real Rain Is Going To Clean These Streets

    Are we headed back to the old New York City of Travis Bickle the Taxicab Driver and Lolitish Jodie Foster? That might seem impossible to many of you who never experienced the old New York. But when Wall Street ran into problems in the seventies, things very quickly deteriorated for the rest of the city. […]

    / Aug 28, 2008 at 11:18 AM
  • News

    Lehman Brothers Sorry, For Everything

    The Wall Street Journal reports that Lehman Brothers recently apologized to clients for ripping off parts of a Sanford Bernstein research report without attribution back in March. In a note sent last week, the bank admitted that the research in a paper on the semiconductor industry “closely resembled” that of analyst Toni Sacconaghi. A Bernstein […]

    / Aug 28, 2008 at 11:12 AM
  • News

    Save Sarbanes Oxley?

    Could the DC Circuit which held that the Sarbanes-Oxley accounting board didn’t infringe on constitutional separation of powers rules have been sending a signal to Congress to fix the law? That’s what law professor Larry Ribstein thinks might have been going on. [T]he DC Circuit figured that by upholding SOX with a strong dissent, it […]

    / Aug 28, 2008 at 8:54 AM
  • Opening Bell

    Opening Bell: 8.28.08

    Sears Holdings Reports Second Quarter Results It’s always fun to check in on our favorite hedge fund/retailer that posts weak earnings every three months… Not surprisingly, earnings were down pretty sharp, over 50 percent, due to the economy and just general stuff. The good news: Sears is making progress on getting its inventory down, and […]

    / Aug 28, 2008 at 7:35 AM
  • News

    Write-Offs: 08.27.08

    $$$ “Paying $11 million to never hear from your father-in-law again is a great deal”– Steve Schwarzman [NG] $$$ Fannie, Freddie and the Low-Risk-Investment Myth [Deal Journal] $$$ Free coffee from Portfolio tomorrow at 30 Wall Street from 7-10 am. $$$ An Interest Rate What? [Crossing Wall Street]

    / Aug 27, 2008 at 5:32 PM
  • business school

    The Boom In B-School Applications

    If you’re thinking that now might be a good time to get off Wall Street and lay low by applying to business school, you aren’t alone. Applications to business schools are booming. “It’s the second-largest year-over-year surge in applications to full-time programs since 2002, and the highest level of increase in five years,” Business Week […]

    / Aug 27, 2008 at 4:48 PM
  • News

    Deck Chairs On The Slocum: Fannie Mae CFO Robert Levin (No Relation) Out

    “Rob Levin has touched virtually every part of this company,” CEO Dan Mudd said. Fannie Mae CEO Dan Mudd Announces Management Restructuring to Drive Capital Management and Credit Loss Reduction Plan [Fannie Mae]

    / Aug 27, 2008 at 4:37 PM
  • News

    The Pete Peterson Hook Up

    We’ve always wanted to be friends with Blackstone co-founder Pete Peterson because he’s sure to have some side-splitting tales about watching Steve Schwarzman try to masturbate and/or sleep in a water bed, two activities which, anatomically speaking, are damn near impossible for SS to do. The whole him being loaded thing was secondary, and besides, […]

    / Aug 27, 2008 at 4:12 PM
  • News

    Attention Swag Lovers: Put Some Money In Wachovia’s Pocket

    New Wachovia CEO Robert Steel vowed to turn things around at the bank and he was not kidding. He started with morale boosting pep rallies and marshmallow tower building competitions, and now he’s moved on to a not even necessary capital raise that, while probably dilutive to current shareholders, is sure to wow the crowds […]

    / Aug 27, 2008 at 3:22 PM
  • News

    Analyst Pussyfoots Around Saying A Failing Bank Will Fail

    Florida-based BankUnited Financial Corp (huge in the option ARM biz in South FL) is down 83 percent YTD. The Office of Thrift Supervision, it’s hilariously named regulator, may lower its capital rating. The humidity in Miami is unbearable this time of year. All signs point to fail. David Bishop, however, refuses to come out and […]

    / Aug 27, 2008 at 1:22 PM
  • News

    Irresponsible Rumor Mongering: Emergency Fed Meeting

    The topic: FNM and FRE merger. And: Should Bernanke shave it off? *PLEASE NOTE: In case you did not get it from the headline, this is a rumor. Our sources, while credible, aren’t even sure it’s true. They received it as a rumor and we pass it on to you as the same. It could […]

    / Aug 27, 2008 at 12:36 PM
  • News

    Why Do Banks Own So Much Fannie and Freddie Preferred?

    Sovereign Bank, which is based in Philadelphia, recently sent out a letter to customers disclosing that the bank owns large amounts of preferred stock issued by Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac. At least one customer in New Jersey reacted to the letter by running to the bank and withdrawing her deposits. We know this because […]

    / Aug 27, 2008 at 12:05 PM

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