How’s your PnL looking so far this year? Happy your long dollar position is starting to look good? Or are you annoying your b-school alumni affairs office asking them to post more jobs for experienced grads (Hey, Columbia, are you reading this? Get to work!).
Either way, if you have time to read this, I’ll bet you’re not doing as well as Adam Levinson. No, not that jerk from Maroon 5 — that’s Adam Levine.
Adam Levinson is doing WAY better than Adam Levine. For one, no one’s calling him a no-talent bastard to his face. For another, Fortress Investment Group just gave him $300 million in shares. But that’s not the first time he made more money than you or that weasel Adam Levine.
According to Jeffrey Cane of Portfolio.com (who wrote a piece linking to a lot of other pieces I didn’t read; As a former derivatives trader, I like to think of this as derivative journalism):

“Levinson, whose annual income Trader Monthly estimated a year ago was between $75 million and $100 million, joined Fortress in 2002 from Goldman Sachs. “

Then Cane asks the question we all ask ourselves when we read such things, if only to make ourselves feel better:

“The package shows that even amid a slowdown, firms are still paying out huge sums to star traders and dealmakers. Are they worth it?”

If you’re not Adam Levinson, the answer to that question is usually, “Hell no! Give that money to me!”. However, if you’re Adam Levinson, the answer is inevitably, “Hell yes! I should be paid more!”
Apparently, a Citigroup analyst disagrees with Fortress and Levinson and Cane provides a nifty quote. However, at the rate things are going, Levinson can buy out Citigroup, fire the analyst, and delete Adam Levine’s bank account so we don’t have to read about his dating exploits ever again.
Apropos of nothing, I always think of this site when i think of Adam Levine.

Comments (6)

  1. Posted by guest | August 11, 2008 at 11:28 AM

    don’t know who you are or where you came from, but me likey.

  2. Posted by Anal_yst | August 11, 2008 at 11:52 AM

    Not bad, and yes, I wouldn’t mind if he gave me teh $$…nsfw tag for the hotchickswithdbags link couldn’t hurt also btw, but now I”m just nitpicking

  3. Posted by guest | August 11, 2008 at 3:57 PM

    eh. with drawbridge macro down ~2% this year it would seem that levinson wouldn’t be in line to receive any carry. fortress may have given him the stock (i assume it’s vested) in order to keep him from joining a competitor or launching his own fund.

  4. Posted by guest | October 8, 2008 at 6:11 PM

    Chesapeake
    http://www.collegejournal.com/article/SB121461354298012689.html
    Imagine the dick sucking power of this team…

  5. Posted by guest | December 6, 2008 at 12:28 PM

    I wonder how that 300 million is holding up now………….

  6. Posted by guest | January 14, 2010 at 9:32 AM

    This isn’t Greg reborn, is it?

Leave a comment

You can log in with your account or comment as a guest below.