It's pretty much just me on this thing today and it's Friday and I've got this corporate card they gave me burning a hole in my pocket and I'm feeling giving so here's what: the first five individuals or group of individuals to e-mail me something good get lunch on us. Doesn't have to be proprietary information or crotch shots of Steve Cohen (though of course both are accepted). Links? Jokes? (Embeddable) Jiminy Glick clips? Whatever. I'm keeping my expectations very, very low. Basically I'm just looking for something that will prevent me from throwing myself in front of a bus. That's my bottom line, and I'm really very flexible on that, too.
This is independent of our formal sandwich welfare program and thus does not have to be cheese steak (though if cheese steak is what you want that's fine). Pizza? Chinese? Ice cream sundaes? Whatever floats your boat. You: pick a place that will deliver to your office and accepts credit cards. No disrespect to the fly-overs or West Coast, the South or France but we're keeping this to New York, New Jersey and Connecticut. E-mail us the info necessary to get it from the purveyor of food into your mouth. I: will place the order and pay for it (well, Dealbreaker will but you know). End scene. Good luck to all (though, really, this is just a test of speed. As long as your Google isn't broken and you've got marginally fast fingers, this shouldn't be too hard).
Posted by guest , Aug 08, 2008 11:21AM
Don't know your e-mail address but here is an analogy we started up yesterday...titled: "The Street's Guide to Romance" Chapter 1: 23y/o's are just like penny stocks...very high risk, but potentially high returns...penny stocks are definitely fun to play...blue chips are great also, steady healthy dividend and low volatility but they come with other issues, mainly too many needy subsidiaries (i.e. - kiddos and ex hubby's) so I think the value lies in the mid-cap arena...looking for the value play, growth is good but as we all know, uncontrollable growth is a bad thing! So I think with this said, my portfolio will mainly concentrate on mid-cap value plays, while still playing the penny and blue chips as opportunities present themselves
Posted by guest , Aug 08, 2008 11:24AM
thanks for the hackneyed/dumb ass cliches, 11:21.
Posted by guest , Aug 08, 2008 11:29AM
take a report, #1
Posted by guest , Aug 08, 2008 11:33AM
Bess, I would be so much more motivated if you were delivering in person
Posted by guest , Aug 08, 2008 11:35AM
@11:33-- you need to be motivated to receive a free lunch?
Posted by guest , Aug 08, 2008 11:38AM
kill yourself 11:21
Posted by guest , Aug 08, 2008 11:38AM
http://myspacedouchebags.com/
nuff said
Posted by guest , Aug 08, 2008 11:40AM
Congressional Races at their finest
http://ap.google.com/article/ALeqM5j_21CQEmVXaRLlqpw6n7eqnKIyNwD92DMEV81
Posted by guest , Aug 08, 2008 11:43AM
@6: well said.
Posted by guest , Aug 08, 2008 11:44AM
This was funny...made me think of DB fondly
http://www.theonion.com/content/news/local_idiot_to_post_comment_on
Posted by guest , Aug 08, 2008 11:45AM
here is a sample
"After clicking the 'submit' button, I will immediately refresh the page so that I can view my own comment. I will then notice that my comment has not appeared because the server has not yet processed my request, become angry and confused, and re-post the same comment with unintentional variations on the original wording and misspellings, creating two slightly different yet equally moronic comments," he said. "It is my hope that this will illustrate both my childlike level of impatience and my inability to replicate a simple string of letters and symbols 30 seconds after having composed it."
Posted by guest , Aug 08, 2008 11:46AM
hey, I'd like to help, but I have work to do.
think of the level of creativity you're gonna get by those who don't.
If you eat cheese steaks, ice cream, and pizza for lunch, than I can (thank you) quite being distracted by images that might float into my mind triggered by your superlative communication skills - always a weakness for me.
good luck to you and your crack staff of beat useless interns.
Posted by guest , Aug 08, 2008 11:47AM
How about a playaz survey- who has hit that intern ( or colleague ) at the workplace
Posted by guest , Aug 08, 2008 11:50AM
@11 - Priceless. You've captured the essence of dealbreaker commenters
Posted by guest , Aug 08, 2008 11:50AM
How about a ring ding with mayo, yum!
Posted by guest , Aug 08, 2008 11:51AM
@12-- what 6 said.
Posted by FUNdamental , Aug 08, 2008 11:54AM
JERZEEEE WEEEKEND!!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sEzy9e3Cwh0
Posted by BlackSwan06 , Aug 08, 2008 12:03PM
@FUN - Horrifying. Straight up HORRIFYING.
Posted by guest , Aug 08, 2008 12:04PM
@ 11:54 - nice!
@ 11:21 - at least u thought o something
Posted by guest , Aug 08, 2008 12:12PM
--*Breaking News*--
"A female grizzly bear has escaped from the Bronx Zoo, 7 officials have been mauled to critical condition."- Kevin Fess reports from the NYPost @3:21 pm
Posted by guest , Aug 08, 2008 12:15PM
At the very least should get you to crack a smile for a second or two.
http://www.monkeybusinessblog.com/mbb_weblog/2008/08/i-think-i-found.html
Posted by guest , Aug 08, 2008 12:16PM
Guido Beach-unbelievable FUN-thats why I prefer tubing on the Delaware
Posted by AJ , Aug 08, 2008 12:29PM
@Fun - amazing
Posted by girl , Aug 08, 2008 12:33PM
@ 11, amazing
Posted by guest , Aug 08, 2008 12:35PM
this is truly ironic given recent headlines:
http://ap.google.com/article/ALeqM5i_4w_sLLEcauM1G4kb0Ld03RCR3AD92CTOTO3
Posted by I am a Dude , Aug 08, 2008 1:44PM
who got the lunch?
Posted by guest , Aug 08, 2008 1:58PM
@26: who won...??
Posted by I am a Dude , Aug 08, 2008 2:04PM
@27
thats what i was asking. who won the free lunch.
being that its 2:02pm the DB quittin bell has already sounded, and Bess is long gone on her way to Beachcomb the hamptons or whatever she does.
Posted by guest , Aug 08, 2008 2:05PM
I got one (seriously).
Posted by guest , Aug 08, 2008 2:07PM
@29-- what did you get?
Posted by guest , Aug 08, 2008 2:10PM
@30, the same soup and salad I get every day. Wasn't going to go to town (and risk angering Bess).
Posted by guest , Aug 08, 2008 2:12PM
@31- ha! i got 50 usd worth of sushi.
Posted by I am a Dude , Aug 08, 2008 2:13PM
@29
soup and salad? what did that cost Bess? 7 bux?
i would have passed on lunch and told Bess to use the money on a manicure.
Posted by guest , Aug 08, 2008 2:14PM
@i am a dude-- you're a creepy mother fucker. also, as stated, it didn't cost bess anything. she put it on her corporate card.
Posted by guest , Aug 08, 2008 2:16PM
@33, it cost $14.31, but I wrote the $2 tip on the receipt. Sucker!
Posted by I am a Dude , Aug 08, 2008 2:30PM
@34
its difficult to explain how little i care about what you think about me.
just to clarify the manicure joke for all you NEW readers out there, back in '06 when Bess was a young intern, she was sent on field trip to Greenwich. she took pictures of her nails, sans a mani.
here is the link:(i had to search on google because, as everyone here knows, the IT and web development on this site sucks)
http://dealbreaker.com/2006/09/pardon_me_but_might_i_suggest.php
Posted by guest , Aug 08, 2008 4:03PM
@ FUN -
How do you find these things?
Please tell me you don't wear t-shirts with polos under them. Horrible.