Congratulations! Your decision to annoy the British makes you part of a long and storied tradition of irritating foreigners with deep-rooted superiority complexes and a sense of smug entitlement. Their particular disposition makes the British a popular target. This program will give you the tools you need to successfully and expertly annoy the British in a cost effective manner.
The key to annoying the British is to understand the particular idiosyncrasies that make them vulnerable to agitation. Four consistently successful themes include:
1. The Irish
2. Competition or “Unsportsmanlike Play”
3. Internal Political Strife
4. Capital Flight
First Exercise:
The British Bankers Association is to deliver a letter to the Government complaining about the legislation extending state-backed guarantees for all deposits held in Irish banks.
In a statement, the Association says the move has distorted competition and put banks in other jurisdictions, especially in Northern Ireland, as a competitive disadvantage. British banks have complained that the legislation would distort competition.
There are reports that money is being moved to Irish institutions from the UK.
Scheme ‘problem for UK’ [RTE Business]
epstein gold at tsg
http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/years/2008/1001083epstein1.html?link=rssfeed
potato famine revenge
5. US funding for terrorist organisations related to 1-3 above
Well played Equity Private… well played.
Slow News day…
story of my life…
http://oddmusings.wordpress.com/2008/09/26/50/
How come the BBA didn’t complain this much when they had pretty strong evidence that LIBOR was being manipulated earlier this year, eventually doing nothing. I do think EP got themes dead on. Think about it:
1. The Irish
Obvious
2. Competition or “Unsportsmanlike Play”
Beckham did NOT deserve that red card in the ’98 WC
3. Internal Political Strife
If you put Gordon Brown and Tony Blair in a room with no windows, only one guy’s getting out alive, and it’s David Cameron. (Can we just force them to make Miliband PM?)
4. Capital Flight
Seriously, the rents at Canary Wharf are EXPENSIVE
@ 5 – I have to admit to being particularly disturbed when I saw advertising for ‘IRAs’ in my local Chase
@ 3 – I have to admit to being particularly disturbed when I saw advertising for ‘IRAs’ in my local Chase
Up the Irish! Guiness for strength!
St. James Gate is aces.
Two Irishmen walked out of a bar.
(The only joke with a set-up and punchline in the same sentence.)
@1 + awesome hand lube + m&m’s = gold.
Dow down 265 points. LIBOR is soaring. Bailout is working just fine.
http://www.bloomberg.com/apps/news?pid=20601087&sid=avcUzkUD7vWs&refer=home
@13 – dumb dumb head, it hasn’t passed yet.
@13 – see definition of “Senate” vs definition of “House”. There is no bailout yet. Please see 14′s comment as well.
@14 and @15 The market already priced in that it passed. So as far Mr. Market is concerned, it’s already law. Trust if the House fails to pass again, the Dow will have a cow.
No people on Earth more amusing than the Irish, even though I am one. In this case, the Irish government offering a guarantee they couldn’t possibly meet if the run on the bank they prevented returns as soon as people figure this one out. Please tell me where a country of 4 million people, gypsys included, has $400,000,000,000 euros stashed. Methinks they need to move the Treasury abit further from St. James’ Gate. Obviously a spillover effect.
British whinny bastards. What did they think their actions with Northern Rock did?
5. Their teeth.
6. Flight from Dunkirk.
7. Getting kicked out of India by Gandhi.
This is actually very amusing. Stiff upper lip. Good afternoon.
No. 13, how can the bailout be working? The bill hasn’t passed?
I know you say it is priced in but they may not pass it.
@19
FLOAT from Dunkirk
Anyone can anger the Brits. It takes O’Reilly to really piss off the French.
Nancy is putting up a good front but the American people are sending cards and letters to all their representatives sort of like “Miracle on 34th Street” style. The cards and letters aren’t for this bill, they are flatly against.
#24, sometimes a leader has to do something the people are against.. otherwise you may as well replace people in congress with electronic voting machines and have majority rule for everything
@25, You see, that would be a true Democracy that D.C. has been cramming down our throughts for the past century as opposed to the representative republic that we actually live in. Worked well for the Greeks too ;p
@25, You see, that would be a true Democracy that D.C. has been cramming down our throats for the past century as opposed to the representative republic that we actually live in. Worked well for the Greeks too ;p
cant spell today >.
my personal faves:
8. point out that they live in a monarchy with an unwritten constitution
9. joke about homosexual games they all played in private school (e.g., “soggy biscuits”)
10. epilepsy rampant among in-bred upper crust
11. epic failure to win Wimbledon leading to embarrassing adoption of Canadians and Scottish as English heroes.
12. epic failure to even reach semis in the World Cup since ’66
13. epic failure to compete in cricket
14. cowardly retreat in Basra, US Marines bailed them out
15. Galipoli
16. respond to criticism of current U.S. policy by pointing to British torture, suspension of civil liberties, imprisonment without charge and various nefarious activities during The Troubles…
Re: teh Northern Rock comment. The UK govt expressly agreed to limit retail deposits at the time it nationalised NR so as not to distort the market and poach customers from all the other bank insitutions. NR pulled a load of deals yesterday as a result of that commitment according to the FT.
Don’t get me started on the USSA – the United Socialist States of America now that you have succeeded in breaking capitalism. Being English I am too gracious to comment further and leave it to you to draw your own conclusions.
I have done it before. It is going to my f**king lawyers. So are about three others. If they can find something in it that is a court case it is going to court. I am not f**king about. I don’t talk to f**king anybody. It is raking up stories. You are f**king so f**king slimy you are raking up players that I got rid of. Players that I had fallen out with. You are not asking Robbie Earle, because he is sensible. You are not asking Warren Barton? No. Because he is f**king sensible. Anyone who had played for me for 10 years at any level … [but] you will find some c**t that …
Joe Kinnear! Welcome!
Just so Americans don’t waste their time, no-one in the UK cares about 5, 7, 8, 9, 10, 14 (you can keep your stupid war) and 15. 6, the flight from Dunkirk, is something we’re proud of due to the orderly way the evacuation was conducted under fire and the way civilians crossed the Channel in their own boats to help out.
We have never understood the Americans’ obsession with our teeth. I have never heard of an American successfully offending a real live British person by a reference to teeth.