Posted by guest , Nov 04, 2008 11:17AM

Second bitches

Dick Fuld for Treasury Secretary

Posted by guest , Nov 04, 2008 11:18AM

@1,2 - how long have you two been unemployed? isn't it time to give up career in finance? why troll around in a finance website?

game over for you two losers

Posted by guest , Nov 04, 2008 11:18AM

Guys in my high school used to lose 30% of people's money in a year...it was no big deal.

Posted by guest , Nov 04, 2008 11:19AM

FUCK CAXTON
FUCK HEDGE FUNDS
FUCK THE PUSSIES WHO RUN THEM
FUCK PORTFOLIO MANAGERS

FUCK CAXTON>>>>>>>>

Posted by guest , Nov 04, 2008 11:20AM

Hedge fund traders don't lose money; redemptions cause it.

Posted by guest , Nov 04, 2008 11:25AM

Right. Caxton, Citadel, et al are down 25% or more YTD because of redemptions. Otherwise they would all be up double digits.

Posted by guest , Nov 04, 2008 11:25AM

Caxton is down because they are wussies.

Posted by guest , Nov 04, 2008 11:27AM

@5 wharton allcaps? or a frustrated janitor with low self esteem?

Posted by guest , Nov 04, 2008 11:28AM

Someone needs a lesson here in the difference between realized and unrealized gains and losses. That said, some do in fact believe that the frenzied unwinding of positions by hedge funds (due to redemptions) was a factor in the sept/oct market decline.

Posted by guest , Nov 04, 2008 11:29AM

@8: yeah right... citadel making money on its covert book? I'd like to smoke the same pot than yours...

Posted by guest , Nov 04, 2008 11:29AM

@11 Agreed.

Posted by guest , Nov 04, 2008 11:29AM

@10 - Not mutually exclusive. I know many Wharton grads who are janitors.

Posted by guest , Nov 04, 2008 11:31AM

Redemptions FT-15.20%L

Posted by guest , Nov 04, 2008 11:32AM

http://www.ft.com/cms/s/0/f7c8d9ee-aa1a-11dd-958b-000077b07658.html?nclick_check=1

Posted by guest , Nov 04, 2008 11:36AM

@14 like the complete 08 and 09 vintage. i hear they are skipping advanced portfolio theory and valuation classes just to spend more time with the pro's working the halways, learn tricks of the trade.. How to sort mail, what cleaning agent to use on wood, how suck the blockage out off a clogged toilet...

Posted by guest , Nov 04, 2008 11:37AM

17 No. They can also turn into larger unrealized losses. Oh wait, you're kidding.

Posted by guest , Nov 04, 2008 11:39AM

I'm a hedge fund trader...what's a loss?

Posted by guest , Nov 04, 2008 11:44AM

Generic Name Capital Management
Oct-08: -12.60%
YTD: -35.47%

Why do we care again?

Posted by guest , Nov 04, 2008 11:45AM

@21 because if these returns continue a certain someone in Greenwich might have to sell some of his 30 toilets to pay for his mortgage....

Posted by guest , Nov 04, 2008 11:46AM

Why do ratings agencies treat unrealized losses like real losses if unrealized losses are non-cash or "just on paper"?

~The Smartest Man in the World

Posted by guest , Nov 04, 2008 11:50AM

When losses are of sufficient size, you have the following:

realized loss = shit in one hand
unrealized loss = wish in the other

Posted by guest , Nov 04, 2008 11:53AM

@21- you're right, you don't to care about anything.

-nihilist

Posted by guest , Nov 04, 2008 11:55AM

@21:

Because it tells the tale: Hedge funds are liars or idiots because they don't hedge.

Look, a hedge fund should not have market risk exposure of this magnitude. Run HF betas over the past few years and you'll see they are > 1 *cough* leverage.

They are supposed to have 0 beta exposure to most known types of market risk.

Seeing all these superstars go up in flames is telling that they really were just well educated casino gamblers. Or alternatively, too smart for their own good - that they missed the obvious, ala LTCM and liquidity+leverage.

I'll bet most HFs simply didn't learn from LTCM. shame shame shame

Posted by guest , Nov 04, 2008 11:57AM

"All the hedgies in the house pull your pants up!"
"All the hedgies in the house pull your pants up!"

~Rappin' Banker

Posted by guest , Nov 04, 2008 11:59AM

@26...they are just glorified mutual funds that charge higher fees, especially now that 130/30 mutual funds exist

Posted by guest , Nov 04, 2008 12:06PM

28 a 130/30 is not a hedge fund. Heres a quick lesson in portfolio construction: funds develop ideas and then weight or underweight them versus the index against which they're benchmarked. Lets say GE has a 5% index weight - if they don't like it, they invest 1% in GE, underweighting it by 4%. Say they don't like JOYG, which has say an index weight of .1%. In a typical long fund, all they can do is not own it - resulting in a .1% underweight, which is insignificant. By allowing them to short, the 130/30 structure allows them to make a bet on not liking names like JOYG. And they would argue that they have their highest conviction in such names, since they are not as picked over as the GEs of the world. I dare you to start sh!!ting on me.

Posted by guest , Nov 04, 2008 12:11PM

YTD the SP5 is down (34%)which means they have done their job-outperform the market. It doesnt matter that the market tanked-they did better.

Posted by guest , Nov 04, 2008 12:16PM

@29...Apparently you can't read. I said some hedge funds were like mutual funds, not vice versa. I say this because they make short bets not as a "hedge" against there portfolio, but purely as a trade to get extra return. If they did pair their long and short bets properly they wouldn't be down 25%+ like the market they should be down only a fraction as their gains on shorts would offset their losses on their longs. Apparently this hasn't happened from the numbers that have been coming out recently. And I just shit on you.

Posted by guest , Nov 04, 2008 12:17PM

30 Wrong. Totally depends on the strategy. A lot of absolute return funds - which have benchmarks of say LIBOR + 3% - are generating big negative returns. Thats horrible, esp when you consider that investors buy those funds to port Alpha. That is, they buy the fund as well as S&P500 index futures, expecting an all in return of S&P500+3%. In this environment, they got a double whammy - loss on the index, compounded by a loss on the hedge fund.

Posted by guest , Nov 04, 2008 12:27PM

@32...the use of "all in" is exactly why it is just like gambling...a fucking poker game.

You get fucked on the river or 4th street and you lose your shit. No matter how good the cards are that you held or how smart you bet...

Posted by guest , Nov 04, 2008 12:35PM

Anyone want to buy some portable alpha? just give me a minute to pull it out of my ass.

Posted by guest , Nov 04, 2008 12:37PM

caxton alpha equity is a long only fund, so not surprising they down 80% of what the MSCI World is down.

Posted by guest , Nov 04, 2008 12:55PM

@29 no response? Are you to busy cleaning up after I shit on you?

Posted by guest , Nov 04, 2008 2:27PM

...speaking of poker, lookee here at what DB's fav hedgiecrush has been up to, instead of say, righting the ship at his underperforming-despite-call-of-the-year shop...

http://www.foxwoods.com/OurWonders/Gaming/Poker/PDFs/WPF/3000NoLimitHoldem-110208.pdf