'Dirty Money' Is Still Money, Am I Right?

Posted by Bess Levin, Nov 11, 2008, 4:54pm

Picture 166.pngBy now you obviously know that CNBC is airing a special on the hooker business tonight at 10 called "Dirty Money," as if to imply there's something impure about the industry. Obviously there'll be entertainment value to the whole thing but let's be honest-- considering the non-existent job prospects in the financial services field at the moment, some of you should probably consider finding yourselves a position as a high-end street walker. We spoke earlier with the lovely Melissa Francis, who narrates the segment, and I say completely sincerely that you guys could do a lot worse than get involved with the fairly innocuous and highly lucrative sex for money racket.

For starters, your colleagues would be of the aesthetically pleasing variety, which counts for a lot (nobody wants the unattractive in their line of vision if they can help it). And smart! Mel and CNBC focussed on three women in particular and she says they are all highly educated, speak many languages and "travel the world." They agreed to be interviewed because they're proud of their business and take it very seriously, always performing due diligence. Apparently part of the background check performed on potential clients includes calling them at work (which, if any of you decide after watching to get involved, I beg you to please let me be a fly on the wall for this particular step).

From what Francis told me, it doesn't really sound like you'd feel too skanky while doing it, because these girls are "different than the kind you'd pick up at Penn Station," and there's no more taint to it than ladies in college ten years ago who would "strip on the side of class" for a little extra money. And by little extra money I mean big money. Through the entire process, which began in March right after Eliot Spitzer went down for interfacing with his own prostitute, Melissa and CNBC were told by the women in the field that Ashley Dupre, who if memory serves went for the going rate of $1,000/hour, wasn't even considered high end. AND, you could parlay this into a new job workin *the* Street, because apparently a big part of the job is going with your client to various work functions where you could surely pass out some resumes on the side.* Basically it's a win win. If you hope to have a future in either field-- actual or theoretical prostitution--, you'll tune in.


*I'll get you started, you finish it off: "You like that, baby? Good. Hey, say, while I have you here, please, take a copy of my resume. My goal is to obtain a rewarding and lucrative position in a financial firm of note with the capital base to weather the current storm and with an interest in developing its people. And here's my card, cell phone on the back, oh but I guess you already have that. Please note my email is no longer Jim.Cayne AT Bear DOT COM, but first name dot last name at yahoo dot com. Can we talk about it next session?"

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