Merrill Lynch Joins War On Christmas

Posted by Bess Levin, Nov 10, 2008, 10:09am

Merrill Lynch has added itself to a most undesirable list of firms that are toeing the no money, no holiday party line this year. No company-wide memo has been sent out yet, but managers were informed late last week that the bank is indeed going the way of Morgan Stanley, Barclays, Lazard et al. Obviously there are a few theories for this terribly disappointing news, all of which we reject as acceptable reasons for being stripped of even the possibility of an electric moment between a drunk John Thain and a uninvited but crashing Stan O'Neal who's known to get pawsy around mistletoe. A. It has to do with the firing (and hiring) of a bunch of employees. B. All party funds were spent on Peter Kraus's exit package. C. The whole being bought by Bank of America thing. None of these work for us, but most especially the last. Now is the exact moment they should be blowing every last penny on something huge before turning things over to Ken Lewis and saying 'your problem,' including clean up duty, and the task of scrubbing the vomit out of John Thain's party dress.

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Comments

1

Posted by guest , Nov 10, 2008 10:13AM

such a shame... any word on JP Morgan's holiday parties?

2

Posted by guest , Nov 10, 2008 10:22AM

They should have it at O'Kelly's 17 million dollar pad. Show what "hard work" gets u at BAC.

3

Posted by guest , Nov 10, 2008 10:23AM

John T is a terrible dancer ... thats why

4

Posted by guest , Nov 10, 2008 11:36AM

@3 not terrible..just awful...you should have seen him at lloyd blankfeins sons bar mitzvah...someones got to teach him the hora....

5

Posted by guest , Nov 10, 2008 12:51PM

People's Bank of China will save Christmas for all of Wall Street. You've got to believe bitches, you've got to believe.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=46WcFObgYhI


SPODE

6

Posted by guest , Nov 10, 2008 2:53PM

Merril's still getting bonuses.

7

Posted by guest , Nov 10, 2008 4:03PM

Just announced....NO UBS CHRISTMAS PARTY

8

Posted by guest , Nov 12, 2008 5:59AM

Just announced.... NO UBS

9

Posted by guest , Nov 24, 2008 3:20PM

ML no parties across the country.

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