So Long As There Are Financial Services Hacks Binging And Purging Vending Machine Snacks, The Market Will Be Okay

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Listen, ladies. I know you think things are prettay prettay prettay bad these days but you are dead wrong. Here's why-- right now, at a certain financial services firm in midtown one brave young solider is taking part in a vending machine challenge. One of everything, 2-6. We're told he's halfway done, having "blazed" through the Sun Chips "like a hot knife through butter" and "squashed the Lays like an ant."

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Comments

1

Posted by guest , Nov 13, 2008 4:22PM

F___ being first

2

Posted by bondguy007 , Nov 13, 2008 4:22PM

Bump up that cholesterol to go along with your blood pressure.

3

Posted by guest , Nov 13, 2008 4:24PM

Hahaha! Nice spreadsheet. thx for posting Bess - made my fucking day!

4

Posted by guest , Nov 13, 2008 4:24PM

WOOHOOO

Something to be proud of!

Four more years of Dick & Bush!!!!!

5

Posted by guest , Nov 13, 2008 4:24PM

Too long; didn't read. com.

6

Posted by guest , Nov 13, 2008 4:24PM

seriously? A mac?

7

Posted by guest , Nov 13, 2008 4:24PM

I thought people had to wear ties in NYC.

/wears a tie in SoCal

8

Posted by guest , Nov 13, 2008 4:26PM

What, no Brawndo?

9

Posted by guest , Nov 13, 2008 4:26PM

live-blogging please!!

10

Posted by guest , Nov 13, 2008 4:27PM

Dick Fuld is celebrating hs recent art sales....

11

Posted by guest , Nov 13, 2008 4:28PM

You should have eaten financial shares in your retirement fund account as called for at the blog below where the world best market timer is there to give you just bottoms (and tops where you should offload on dumb money like the guy eating chips).

Link below (while there also check the nailing of October 10, 16, 24, and today November 13 bottom). Check also the election day top. He nailed it as well.

http://financialtraders.blogspot.com/2008/11/financials-eft-xlf-fidelity-select.html

12

Posted by guest , Nov 13, 2008 4:28PM

Dick...

13

Posted by guest , Nov 13, 2008 4:28PM

live-blogging please!!

14

Posted by guest , Nov 13, 2008 4:28PM

@7

vending machine challenge --clearly a game for Ops monkeys

hence the lack of a tie...

15

Posted by Anal_yst , Nov 13, 2008 4:28PM

Thats alota Nature's Valley in 1 vending machine, can't see that working out well...

16

Posted by guest , Nov 13, 2008 4:29PM

Too bad you limit it to people in NYC, because taking that list down in 4 hours is easy.

But good luck to this guy.

17

Posted by guest , Nov 13, 2008 4:30PM

Who made that spreadsheet on their Mac?

18

Posted by guest , Nov 13, 2008 4:30PM

Obviously the SmartFood doesn't work.

19

Posted by guest , Nov 13, 2008 4:31PM

Does he have the first year associate numbers?

20

Posted by guest , Nov 13, 2008 4:32PM

What firm is this?

21

Posted by guest , Nov 13, 2008 4:32PM

@19 hahaha!

22

Posted by guest , Nov 13, 2008 4:32PM

i bet those are just nutrition facts per serving. theres probably more than one serving in each item

and seriously... a mac?! you cant even atl e s v anything

23

Posted by guest , Nov 13, 2008 4:33PM

90/100/110 confirmed.

24

Posted by guest , Nov 13, 2008 4:33PM

What the fuck happened in the market? Relief rally because Waxman didn't ass-rape Griffin et al on Capitol Hill?

25

Posted by guest , Nov 13, 2008 4:35PM

Devil Dogs...those are huge! Get Artie Lange in there...he'll do it and wash it down with a 6 pack of Hawaiian Punch.

26

Posted by Bess Levin , Nov 13, 2008 4:35PM

Calm yourselves. It was made in Excel, I had to convert it for the picture.

27

Posted by VOL IS KING , Nov 13, 2008 4:37PM

is this a joke? That's less calories than a frappicino. Be a man, empty the machine!

He downs a reese's you take down two snickers he eats a snickers you down two apple pies. THAT's the Chicago and that's how we're going to beat him.

28

Posted by guest , Nov 13, 2008 4:37PM

The stock market is broken. Seriously.

29

Posted by guest , Nov 13, 2008 4:37PM

@7 and 14...so you morons think you only go tie-less in ops?

What are you tools...residential real estate brokers at Coldwell Banker?

Sincerely,
Buy side associate who only wears ties for client meetings

30

Posted by guest , Nov 13, 2008 4:42PM

The stock market is broken. Seriously.

31

Posted by guest , Nov 13, 2008 4:42PM

Bess, Bess, Bess...

Those snacks don't have 5.4 kilos of sodium. They don't have 5.4 kilos of anything.


Ouchie.

32

Posted by guest , Nov 13, 2008 4:51PM

chill out 29... were you short at the end of the day?

its just a joke I also came from a firm where everyone who didn't have a client face meeting went tie-less

but why such a harsh defense of operations if you're a "buy-side associate" (which means what btw?)?

-14

33

Posted by guest , Nov 13, 2008 4:55PM

about 30 items, those bags average about 350 calories.... 10,500 calories, enough to feed an analyst for an entire workweek.

Won't you think of the starving lehmanites? Oh the humanity.

34

Posted by Investorcluzo , Nov 13, 2008 4:56PM

is morgan stanley still going biz casual or are we talking barcleh's?

35

Posted by guest , Nov 13, 2008 4:56PM

Don't get the sweet and salty nutz bar stuck in your throat

36

Posted by guest , Nov 13, 2008 4:58PM

Don't get the sweet and salty nutz bar stuck in your throat

37

Posted by guest , Nov 13, 2008 4:58PM

Don't get the sweet and salty nutz bar stuck in your throat

38

Posted by guest , Nov 13, 2008 5:09PM

buy side associate = accepting no gain on your investments if the gov will bail you out

shut up PE hacks. your job is next.

39

Posted by SausageOfDoom , Nov 13, 2008 5:15PM

@31: Maybe that last item is really a Combo-flavored pizza

40

Posted by guest , Nov 13, 2008 5:17PM

My guess is he's going to need a government bailout... ON THE TOILET!!!

41

Posted by guest , Nov 13, 2008 5:17PM

My guess is he's going to need a government bailout... ON THE TOILET!!!

42

Posted by guest , Nov 13, 2008 5:28PM

Can we have an update on how is doing?

43

Posted by guest , Nov 13, 2008 5:31PM

Also, they're not "Cape Code" chips. Until this guy hits the bathroom, in which case someone will need to call a Code 13.

--31.

Don't know what a code 13 is? Check here:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yu_moia-oVI

44

Posted by guest , Nov 13, 2008 5:32PM

that screen shot is from a mac. weaksauce.

45

Posted by guest , Nov 13, 2008 5:37PM

@43. Here is the new code 13.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=65I0HNvTDH4

46

Posted by guest , Nov 13, 2008 5:47PM

If he has that much time to eat and that little for food, he must be in sales.

47

Posted by guest , Nov 13, 2008 5:55PM

Actually, you'll be surprised. Vending machine food gets pretty expensive. It really adds up.

48

Posted by guest , Nov 13, 2008 5:56PM

I bet he shits a bearcat with claws.

49

Posted by guest , Nov 13, 2008 6:01PM

They'd better reserve the whole mens room just for him. Give the kid two plungers. He'll probably crack the bowl, but he'll be on CNBC tomorrow as a hero.

50

Posted by Tau , Nov 13, 2008 6:01PM

Makes me kinda hungry

Vending machines are so sell-side

51

Posted by guest , Nov 13, 2008 6:41PM

He didn't make it, he had 6 snacks left....

52

Posted by guest , Nov 14, 2008 4:31AM

38 - its PE baller here, now on all fours you little bitch and prepare to get pumped.
don't run your mouth about things that are out of you league - if you would send your cv to a PE firm they would think you were applying for an executive assistant position. and you know it. bitch.

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