• 12 Dec 2008 at 8:12 AM

Opening Bell: 12.12.08

Picture 328.pngBernie Madoff Death Watch (NYP)
Which is more likely: an investor takes a hit on Madoff or a Madoff investor kills himself? Sayeth the Post:

Suicide hotlines in Greenwich, Conn., could be lit up today as investors in the posh suburb begin to realize how much they’ve lost in the rip-off scheme perpetrated by Wall Street legend Bernard Madoff.
[...]
Groups known to have worked with Madoff in the past include alternative-asset manager Fairfield Greenwich Group, the Nomura Bank of Japan, and Swiss asset-management firm NPB New Private Bank.
Sources tell The Post that Madoff managed money for Fairfield Greenwich through a $7 billion hedge fund called Fairfield Sentry, which Nomura and NPB offered to clients.

And these guys will probably be dead soon anyway but you never know:

Membership rosters at a number of Florida country clubs could be particularly hard hit by Mr. Madoff’s alleged scheme, including Boca Rio Golf Club in Boca Raton and the Palm Beach Country Club in Palm Beach. Members of these clubs helped promote Mr. Madoff’s services to the clubs’ membership, though the clubs themselves weren’t involved, club members said. Having money with Mr. Madoff was a symbol of prestige within these clubs, several member say.

BlackRock CEO Announces Cuts Have Been Made, Fidelity Cuts Looming (CNBC)
Erring on the side of brevity, CNBC announces:
1. BlackRock has made 500 cuts in days past, many of the positions part time according to Fink.
2. Fidelity is looking at cutting 3000 people through early 2009.
Goldman Compensation Fund To See $12B (Reuters)
The fund is down $8B from $20B, which means “Top bankers could see their bonuses shrink as much as 80 percent, while lower-level workers could see their bonuses fall 50 percent, the paper said.”
While normally this would be cause for concern, I think anyone that gets more than a box of used condoms this year will be excited.
Fed Says ‘No’ to Bloomberg, Extends Middle Finger (Bloomberg)
Conspiracy theories abound, the Fed is denying the request by Bloomberg for insight into how/where/why about $2T has been invested during this turmoil under various programs. The Fed claimed they don’t have to release information on “trade secrets and commercial information” and pointed out that they don’t have to release internal memos under such requests.
Cue Senate bitching.
UBS Freezes $6B Property Fund (CNBC)
“Swiss bank UBS said on Friday it had frozen a $6 billion real estate fund as it could not keep up with redemption requests from wealth management clients.
The Jersey-based UBS Wealth Management Global Property Fund will be closed until the end of 2009.”
Just a thought: wealth management clients are calling for redemptions to pay their IRS penalties?
Executive Accused In Mortgage Scheme (WSJ)
“Mr. Gordon, a former director of residential acquisitions at Bayview, made more than $2.8 million in additional commissions by altering the value of 2,800 loans from 2001 to 2006, according to documents filed by prosecutors in U.S. District Court in Miami.”
I have the feeling that this is a sign of things to come: we should see hundreds of these cases pop up across the United States. The idea that bankers created this problem is as ludicrous now as the day it was conceived: this is a mom and pop shop issue that went big time, and I personally hope they get their asses handed to them.
PNC’s Purchase Of National City Approved (Reuters)
“As a condition of the merger, PNC will sell 61 National City branch offices in western Pennsylvania with deposits totaling $4.1 billion. Once the merger is complete, PNC will have about $289 billion in assets and $180 billion in deposits.”
–William Richards

Comments (33)

  1. Posted by guest | December 12, 2008 at 8:16 AM

    first – wake up everybody – carmakers will prob take a hit today

  2. Posted by guest | December 12, 2008 at 8:23 AM

    @1: “probably?” finance.yahoo.com, please.
    If the GS comp fund was down “$8 billion from $20 billion,” how does that equate to an “80%” cut in senior compensation?

  3. Posted by guest | December 12, 2008 at 8:29 AM

    @1 Cliff is that you again? Please stop posting–you’re worse than Timmayyy.

  4. Posted by guest | December 12, 2008 at 8:29 AM

    @2: what part of “as much as” did you not manage to understand?

  5. Posted by guest | December 12, 2008 at 8:29 AM

    GS comp down to 12bn…Factor in the amount of layoffs and everyone should be pretty happy…
    unless they really wanted some used condoms

  6. Posted by guest | December 12, 2008 at 8:32 AM

    @4: Dp you always buy into reporters’ speculation? “As much as” could mean anything.

  7. Posted by guest | December 12, 2008 at 8:36 AM

    “Suicide hotlines in Greenwich, Conn., could be lit up today as investors in the posh suburb begin to realize how much they’ve lost in the rip-off scheme perpetrated by Wall Street legend Bernard Madoff. ”
    Making fun of other people’s misfortune in form of lay offs or losing is just wrong. Although I think Cliff Ass Ness is a moron, I agree with him that Bess is an animal. I hope you guys get ebola, AIDS and cancer! You have been cursed!

  8. Posted by AJ | December 12, 2008 at 8:42 AM

    @7 1) Bess didn’t write this; 2) Will was quoting the New York Post jackass

  9. Posted by Mortimus | December 12, 2008 at 8:42 AM

    Another Tip From Wall Street
    Leave your stock certificates in your mother’s attic
    http://www.dagblog.com/humor-satire/another-tip-wall-street-300

  10. Posted by guest | December 12, 2008 at 8:47 AM

    @7: Fuck you. Bess is the best thing in financial reporting.

  11. Posted by guest | December 12, 2008 at 8:54 AM
  12. Posted by guest | December 12, 2008 at 8:55 AM

    @7 – go back to bed. you can always start job hunting on monday.

  13. Posted by VOL IS KING | December 12, 2008 at 8:56 AM

    @7:
    i love it, its really really funny. Watching everyone blow up, has been fantastic. The ~three months since September 15th have been the greatest and most profitable time of my life. The emperors are wearing no clothes, they own no clothes, and they couldn’t even find clothes if you drew them a map. They are naked and in the cold and it looks like its going to stay that way for a long long time.
    HA HA!
    P.S. Thank you republicans for all the extra vol, you’re right fuck GM let ‘em fail. No skin off my back.

  14. Posted by guest | December 12, 2008 at 8:56 AM

    I worked at Madoff for about 5 years a while back, and the investment group was always spoken about in hushed voices. To say that is was “run on a different floor” is understating things. I never met a single person there who worked on the asset management side. Peter, Mark and Andy have been running the firm on a day-to-day basis for well over 10 years now, and none of them were involved (at least that I saw) in managing the fund.
    So hearing that it was all a big scam is not a surprise to me. I was always wondering who/how the money was being managed.

  15. Posted by guest | December 12, 2008 at 9:01 AM

    @13 doesn’t lose money; he prints it!!!!

  16. Posted by merkin capital partners | December 12, 2008 at 9:08 AM

    barron’s article from 2001 basically asked him why are you so shady… “none of your business”.
    http://online.barrons.com/article/SB989019667829349012.html

  17. Posted by guest | December 12, 2008 at 9:10 AM

    Can somebody, once and for all, explain who the hell is Wideclops?

  18. Posted by guest | December 12, 2008 at 9:15 AM

    There was a picture of some HR chick from some firm (can’t remember which) who was going around handing out pink slips wearing “fuck me” boots.
    Someone found her MySpace or something and it turned out her eyes were set rather far apart. Hence she was named the Wideclops.
    It was funny for about four hours (along with Shamwow, Mayo, and all the other catchphrases here) and it is now only deployed by the terminally unfunny and pathetic.

  19. Posted by guest | December 12, 2008 at 9:17 AM

    @18
    fuck you.
    - Wideclops

  20. Posted by guest | December 12, 2008 at 9:17 AM

    @ 18 – thanks for having the brains and will to answer something other than “your mom.”

  21. Posted by guest | December 12, 2008 at 9:23 AM

    Firm was Morgan Stanley.
    Morgan Stanley banned Dealbreaker over the description of the boots.

  22. Posted by guest | December 12, 2008 at 9:33 AM

    Really, how could bankers possibly know that security salesmen were liars?!
    “The idea that bankers created this problem is as ludicrous now as the day it was conceived”

  23. Posted by guest | December 12, 2008 at 9:38 AM

    @6, keep telling yourself that. Something tells me you are a GS staffer. You are going to get royally screwed, trust me. Oh yeah, ps you wont ever get a big bonus ever again, snoogans

  24. Posted by guest | December 12, 2008 at 9:38 AM

    Is DealBreaker still banned at MS?

  25. Posted by guest | December 12, 2008 at 9:41 AM

    From the WSJ piece:
    “Ira Roth, a New Jersey resident, who says his family has about $1 million invested through Mr. Madoff’s firm, is “in a state of panic.”
    ….Seriously? Ira Roth?

  26. Posted by guest | December 12, 2008 at 9:44 AM

    @ 25
    Good catch! That’s uproarious.

  27. Posted by guest | December 12, 2008 at 9:44 AM

    @15, thats me. Vol is King is a giant knob who probably clears trades at Jefferies and lives in Staten island
    I dont make money, I sleep in it, spend it, print it etc.

  28. Posted by guest | December 12, 2008 at 9:45 AM

    What’s with these PajamaGram ads on CNBC? Does the current CNBC demographic now map to enthusiasts of infomercial sleepwear?
    –Calgary Schmooze

  29. Posted by guest | December 12, 2008 at 9:46 AM

    @25, bet his dog’s name is 401(k)-9

  30. Posted by guest | December 12, 2008 at 10:34 AM
  31. Posted by MarshallStack | December 12, 2008 at 11:13 AM

    @16
    Great find.
    You are a true A Merkin

  32. Posted by guest | December 12, 2008 at 11:36 AM

    pajamagram is the new shamwow

  33. Posted by guest | December 14, 2008 at 3:12 PM

    how can GS pay out even $12 BN when they their balance sheet is in shambles
    how unbelievably SHORT-SIGHTED.
    this is the end ….

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