The quest to turn lead to gold is an old one, and as such we generally treat claims to have discovered the Philosopher’s Stone with skepticism. Great alchemists as memorable as Sir Isaac Newton have met with ignominious failure (and developed life-long cases of cracked, sulfur smelling, chemically burnt skin to boot). So, when Barclehs announces the discovery of the financial Philosopher’s Stone, we did that little closed-mouthed sniffle-laugh and switched into skim-mode.
Barclays Capital, the investment banking division of Barclays PLC, today announces that it has completed the integration of the North American businesses of Lehman Brothers acquired in September 2008. As the final step in the integration, it has strengthened the leadership of the expanded firm by promoting eight senior Managing Directors to its Executive Committee.
Bob Diamond, President, Barclays PLC, said: “The completion of the integration is a significant milestone for our clients, shareholders and employees, four months after announcing the acquisition. Our clients now have the benefit of a fully integrated investment bank able to offer the full array of risk management, financing and advisory products. We are now operating as one firm using our business principles to manage risk, manage costs and stay close to our clients. As we said, we targeted breakeven for the acquired businesses in 2008, and in fact they are already contributing to the bottom line.”
We did, however, notice that grim reality must be setting in. After all, who targets “breakeven” for the discovery of the Philosopher’s Stone?
Barclays Capital Completes Integration of Lehman Brothers; Expands Its Executive Committee [Barclehs AlchemyCapital]
Supposedly a gaggle of Goldmans will be shown the door next week, though it’s unclear if the reduction in headcount is part of the cuts that were mentioned for January back in December, or just Blankfein flying by the seat of his pants. An additional round is also rumored to be in the works for April.
Schapiro Approved as New SEC Chairman (Reuters)
Apparently the New SEC doesn’t take shit from anyone, and maybe carries nightsticks. At her confirmation hearing yesterday, Mary Schapiro vowed– and she actually said this– to ‘take the ‘handcuffs off’ the SEC’s enforcement division and go full force against anyone who violates investors’ trust.”
Citi Directors To Leave (FT)
“Citigroup is to revamp its board with the departure of long-standing members Kenneth Derr and Franklin Thomas following criticism of its ability to supervise the troubled company’s executives and strategy, people close to the situation have said.”
What We Have Here Is A Three Pronged Approach (WSJ)
Apparently what we’re looking at is the following:
1) Stemming Foreclosures.
2) Revamping Existing Efforts.
3) Purchasing of Assets.
Pulling the assets off the books is going to help, but it’s not going to help as fast as the government thinks it will; there would be at least a two quarter bleed before the banks would consider loosening restrictions in re: liquidity.
That being said, we haven’t seen anything concrete on the “Stemming Foreclosures” side yet, and I don’t have a clue what the “Revamping” prong even means.
Google Beats Expectations (Reuters)
“Excluding one-time charges, profit was $5.10 a share, beating the average analyst forecast of $4.95 according to Reuters Estimates.
Revenue rose 18 percent to $5.7 billion — a shadow of the 50 percent growth levels that Google used to enjoy, but considered by analysts to be a robust performance given the weak economy and corporate cutbacks in advertising spending.”
Bankers And Regulators Call It What It Is (Bloomberg)
The idea that just because you avoid the word nationalization it isn’t in play is annoying; the bottom line here is that the government has in fact nationalized some of the banks. Look at it like this: arrest in many states is defined as the inability to leave. Now, the police won’t directly place you under arrest in most cases until they’re done questioning you about whatever heinous thing you did/peed on. But, should you be snarky and insist on departure, they will (usually) cuff your ass.
No one in the government is calling what’s going on nationalization until the banks decide that they can act autonomously again. Or, as Jon Bruss puts it: “When the Treasury tells a bank to pay a penny a share vs. its old dividend, you know who’s calling the shots.”
Pfizer In Talks To Buy Wyeth (WSJ)
The combination of the two companies would provide for a pharmaceutical powerhouse, one would hope they will use their newfound power for the ultimate good: the panacea for STDs.
“Pfizer, the world’s largest drug maker by revenue, would likely use a combination of cash and stock for the acquisition. Details on price haven’t been worked out, but Wyeth has a market capitalization of about $52 billion and premiums in the sector have averaged just over 20%. That would put the value of the deal at well over $60 billion.”
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DB CooperMarcus Schrenker was arraigned today and quickly pleaded “not guilty” to the charges of intentionally destroying an aircraft and faking a distress call. His public defender (wow that sucks), obviously reacting to the “not guilty” plea, has indicated that he has “reasonable cause” to believe Schrenker is suffering from a mental condition. (We are guessing acute Gottagetawayfromthiscastratingbitchwiththecashitis, but the situation is fluid).
Pilot pleads not guilty in plane crash death hoax [CNN]
As many of you have pointed out, the JP Morgan chart we posted earlier was entirely divorced from even a remote understanding of geometry. We have undertaken to correct the “off by one dimension” error, but owning to time constraints, we are only able to bring you the correction for Citigroup.
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I think RBS is my favorite.
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Honestly, is no one immune?
