Obama was talking stimulus packages earlier this morning, when he took a moment to caution that “taxpayer money should not go toward renovating offices.” Oh, yes, he went there. It might’ve been no big deal to the former MER CEO 24 hours ago, but now that he’s unemployed, this exactly the sort of stuff that’ll get the currently couchbound* John Thain to lean forward** in his sweats, almost spilling his glass*** of Sunny Delight, tell his buddies (Prince, O’Neal) playing XBox in the other room to “shut the fuck up, I want to hear this!” and nudge Cayne to drop the grav-bong**** and turn up the volume.
What was JT feeling when the President publicly slapped him on the wrist? Embarrassment? Shame? None of the above. Pride, my friends. Also getting off on the mention? Charlie Gasparino, who, by several leaps in logic, can now tell people Obama follows his work.
*Green upholstered duchesse c. 1770 ($92,000)
**toward the 55″ Sony Bravia LCD flat panel ($6,000)
***Colbalt Blue Drinking Glass from the Michael Graves collection ($960)
****Swarovski-encrusted (not disclosed)
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- Use the Bloomberg command
NH BLG_DEALBREAKER <GO>
to access Dealbreaker
bitchslapped by the obamanana, right in jt’s face. BAM!
oBAManana!
Bess, I prefer the picture where JT is smiling lovingly at his former boss.
Thain is from a country town of Antioch Illinois – where the FUCK did he get taste like that….?
I hope Thain and his career are forever tied to a really expensive shitter. 10-20years from now he is going to be on vacation with the family in Europe and someone will ask him about his toilet.
@4 – you just answered your own question.
@1@2
I prefer to call him BamBam, from the Flintstones.
Bess-that’s legendary!
No, seriously BL.
What the heck is this “three prong” approach?
Forget about getting people to spend in the future, WE’RE STILL PAYING FOR THE THINGS WE HAVEN’T EXPENSED IN THE PAST 10 YEARS!!
O, how do you get people to pay off their underwater mortgages?
Credit cards?
And O, for that 11% UE 20 something/early 30 somthings, how do you get them to pay off their student loans (while consuming)?
Automobiles? LOC (Line of Credit) Nation needs a bailout fast!
You know he will resurface – Treasury, Fannie, Freddie, under Barney’s desk…
Do Loo-ey cans dream of pedestaled feet?
didn’t thain use the same decorator as the obamas?
Bess I think you should offer a reward for a picture of this $35k. This has to be some special terlet. My only question is does it swallow afterwards?
@11
They can’t afford JT’s decorators. Not even on a presidents salary.
Ummm @8 – not everyone is a dipshit.
How come the Messiah isn’t complaining about the millions of (our) dollars that were spent on his inauguration by financial companies, such as BAC/MER??
Yes, it’s the same decorator. Obama has a $100k slush fund for decor (he’s taxed on the benefit). Michael S. Smith of Santa Monica.
So I take it that Obama is not redecorating the White House or the Oval Office and is just moving is “as is”???
JT Money – Aye yi yi
@17 – yes.
A commode is not a toilet! Although I wish it were since it makes for a funnier story.
com⋅mode /kəˈmoʊd/ –noun
1. A low cabinet or similar piece of furniture, often highly ornamental, containing drawers or shelves.
@17 – yes.
Thain is definitely a peterpuffer. not that theres anything wrong with that but chill with the decorating!
@16
Dude, you’re clutching at straws. It is the White House after all. I’ve always redecorated whenever I move into a new place. So have all presidents/first ladies.
You’re fired for that.
Charles Gasbagarino – validated by Obama today. How does it feel – Superstar!
Such irony! So Obama spends 100 times what Thain spends in this economy and then gives it to Thain in the ass. I’m not defending Thain though. Thain should be smacked for his doings. First he hands out a 15billion dollar bonus package, then he decorates his office with stuff that is clearly in no way of a dire need at the moment.
Do you think Thain is bragging to the wife and kids how Obama mentioned him?
Thain was just doing his part to support the economy
@20…Why would anyone shit in a drawer?
obama is an idiot….
he renovated the office wayy b4 ML got any taxpayer moneh
Paulson is going to Citi?
Guest@#11…
Thain used the same decorator as obama. Problem is, Thain overpaid by $700k for the services of said decorator. Thain $800k for his office; obama $100k for the White House.
Thain obviously didn’t give a shit about spending OPM. Hopefully, Lewis will backcharge Thain personally for the $1.22M that was wasted.
The Guy from Delaware
All this huffing and puffing about Thain’s extravagance is a really just a giant advertisement that he schooled Lewis at his own game and got away with it.
Ring the bell. The teacher is now the student.
Haven’t we seen this movie before? Eddie Murphy understands the pressures of the average American trying to buy his kid a GI Joe with the kung fu grip while Dan Aykroyd tries to hock his watch at a Philly pawn shop.
“Its not luck, Todd”
This all gives a trip to the “John” a whole new meaning…
@14. True, not everyone is a d!p$#!t. But there were enough d!p$#!ts to drive consumption the past 10 years. And there are more than enough d!p$#!ts to adversely affect GDP and jobs and the wholebit. Thus, how is O going to give the d!p$#!ts the ability to continue spending again and at the same rate as before?
@31. Henry Paulson is going to John Hopkins to do International Relations BS.
If he were truely a baller he’d definitely be rocking something more thug, like the panasonic 103″ (or a early version of the 108″ sharp), just sayin…
@14. True, not everyone is a d!p$#!t. But there were enough d!p$#!ts to drive consumption the past 10 years. And there are more than enough d!p$#!ts to adversely affect GDP and jobs and the wholebit. Thus, how is O going to give the d!p$#!ts the ability to continue spending again and at the same rate as before?
@31. Henry Paulson is going to John Hopkins to do International Relations BS.
Guest@#25…
Do you mean “$15 Billion bonus package” or $1.5 Billion? If Thain gave out $15B, he caused MER’s entire 4Q loss. No wonder Thain didn’t tell Lewis about the magnitude of the loss.
The Guy from Delaware
Please somebody photoshop a picture of Thain with #28′s 5th definition of a commode:
an elaborate headdress consisting chiefly of a high framework decorated with lace, ribbons, etc., worn perched on top of the hair by women in the late 17th and early 18th centuries
@28
“Commode on Legs: $35,115″
Have you ever seen a toilet on legs?
Bess, you have a serious infatuation with gravity bongs. Closet party girl?
Cayne can ruin a company, that much he’s proved. But can you get him to look into a vaporizer so he doesn’t ruin his lungs as well? Just doing my part to keep healthcare costs under control.
@41…Only the last time I gave you a Cleveland Steamer.
https://www.abledeluxe.com/oscommerce/images/ts_legs.jpg
Cleveland Steamer – made my day! Does it smell like 5-way?
You don’t know anything about risk unless you have a $40 million desk.
@44 thanks
Maybe JT can run Citi Holdings? If he sold Merrill in 13 months how quick can he unload Citi Holdings?
@44: Brilliant ! Do they come with diamond encrusted seats or do I have to settle for that whole ivory inlaid italian marble look ?
ok, let’s be serious here…
What’s the chance that Gunther is really just some WASPy frat guy that has been pulling a really elaborate joke for years? There’s no way it can be serious, theres no way anyone can take themselves that seriously.
Just a thought.
Where is the link to the Obama quote?
@44 how much for model where the handles match the feet
Is Thain wearing a toupee? From the picture it looks so.
Inquiring mind wants to know. lol.
Not that I’m arguing for JT, but I wonder how much bullshit Obama is going to buy for his rennovations.
Furniture as an asset class looks pretty sweet compared to commercial mortgage trusts.
Plus you can sit on it.
I propose that instead of “going to the bathroom” one states, “I’m off to use the Thain”
And btw … anyone know if TurboTax’s stock took a hit after Geithner’s admission that it is his tax software of choice? Their CEO must have been cringing…
‘Trickle Down’ Economics! Go JT!
After seeing that silly grin of JT looking lovingly at Ken Lewis too many times, that’s a refreshing picture.
quote from 40:
“an elaborate headdress consisting chiefly of a high framework decorated with lace, ribbons, etc., worn perched on top of the hair by women in the late 17th and early 18th centuries”
That thing on Aretha’s head at the Inauguration surely must be one of the definitions.
-mrp
Thain and other big spenders should get the vacant cells opening up at Guantanamo.
@58. I hear you on that! That stupid grin always looked like “Gee, I want to blow that guy”.
In reality though this picture is probably more accurate. It looks more like “after giving it to you up the a$$, I don’t want to see your ugly face”
@30 Obama is correct, Thain was egregious in using money that wasn’t his for this tasteless consumption.
Thain’s redecoration spree was done in early 2008, after the stock market’s initial swoon in 2007, when the Fed began slashing rates to absurdly low levels to keep the economy from slipping into recession. This was a huge giveaway to the financial sector, which was supposed to turn around and lower rates to consumers on mortgages, student loans, etc. because of the cheaper cost of Uncle Sam’s money from the Fed window.
Instead, Merill Lynch used this reprieve to pay for a $1400 sheepskin trash can and other ridiculous items signed by off by John “S”thain. In addition, its traders continued to gamble in the mortgage markets, ultimately taking a $5,000,000,000 hit in the fourth quarter from the losses (trying, and failing, to catch falling knives). Thain should be prosecuted and fined millions. The money would at least help laid off Merrill employees to transition to new lines of work.
Finally, the Obamas contracted Michael Smith for one-eighth his fee for Thain (it’s called driving a bargain) and the White House is always redecorated when a new term begins.
Is Thain employable in the financial industry now? I thought he was heading to Citi, but now that looks too risky for Citi. Damn Ken Lewis!
I believe he’ll need to ask Paulson for help finding a job in academia. The question is what course is he going to “teach” when he gets the job.
Bess…Perhaps you or some other DB poster can put up that photo of Thain’s daughter again. I’m certain you’ll get some mileage out of it. Thanks.
The Guy from Delaware
Banker Conversations
(WilliamBanzai7)
KEN: Nice carpet John, should I take of my shoes?
JOHN: Use the slippers by the door.
KEN: I hear their selling Bernie’s fleet. Some nice hardware there.
JOHN: The guy is a seedy low life crook, he belongs behind bars.
KEN: Come on John, don’t be so hard on the man. He’s like all of us in a sense.
JOHN: Have a seat KEN (Pointing to COMMODE ON LEGS)
KEN: Man this place make my digs look like a Japanese bankers office.
JOHN: (Sitting in George the IV Chair) Dozo Ken-san. Every Wall Street Shogun has his castle.
KEN: So you got your bonus after all?
JOHN: How so?
KEN: You gave it to all your friends down the hall and spent the pre-installment on this fancy french hardware.
JOHN: You like that eh? It’s what we in the business call an AIG omelet.
KEN: You know John, I think I am going to go over and have a look at Bernie’s fleet.
JOHN: Shall I join you. You know China Fun is just down the block from his place.
KEN: No John, you stay here and pack this stuff up while I’m gone.
JOHN: Pack?
KEN: Yes, pack. I want you on the street by 5 PM.
JOHN: I don’t even have any shrink wrap!
KEN: The only shrink wrap you need is Dr. Schadenfreude rapping the “Bailout shuffle”
JOHN: See you in bailout hell Ken.
KEN: We are already there John. We are already there.
[One hour later]
BERNIE: Ken, you have my sympathy. People just don’t appreciate the Ponzi business model in all its subtle manifestations.
Don’t feel taken.
KEN: Skip the sermon Bernie, I’ll take em all.