$$$ Madoff nephew homeless [NYP]
$$$ Preventing The Greatest Heist In History [Clusterstock]
$$$ Not even sure why at this point but: "How My Blog Earned $83,358 In December 2008" [TS]
Comments
Comments hidden for your protection. Show them anyway!More Favorite Reads
Sep 15, 2009, 2:22pm
Technical Difficulties Prevented Warren Buffett From Saving Lehman Brothers
I sense some judgment from the Bloomberg reporter here re:...
More »Sep 15, 2009, 2:00pm
People! THIS TYPE OF PERFORMANCE DOES NOT MAKE PTJ WANT TO RAIN BUCKETS O' CHICKEN ON YOUR ASSES!
Tudor BVI Global: August 2009: 0.5% YTD: 12.5% ...as for...
More »
Sep 09, 2009, 11:27am
Goldman Partner's Neighbors Scandalized By Shirt Optional Parties
Goldman Sachs partner managing director Richard Kimball Jr. apparently got...
More »Sep 09, 2009, 10:15am
Job Openings At AQR! (UPDATE)
Ladies, if you've been looking to work under one of...
More »
Posted by TimothySykes , Jan 20, 2009 5:45PM
Dear Dealbreaker Cuble Monkey Readers,
It's been a while, but I hope you've been the inverse of as good as I've been. While all of you have been reading DB day and night, desperate for signs as to whether or not you still have your cublicle monkey jobs the next day, I've been gradually building a blogging empire. Either you have read or a friend forwaded you my recent blog post detailing my $80,000+ month in December (happy TIMukah to me!), but if you were too drunk, coked out or just Ivy-League schooled (aka financially illiterate), I understand and thus have linked for your learning pleasure above.
Because as your "prestigious" financial firms have been dropping left and right, when joke of an industry magazine 'Trader Monthly' couldn't afford to send out their latest issue-burn bay burn, how you liking 'our average reader make $400,000/year and spends all of it (he actually said that proudly, shows what a bum he is) failed editor-in-chief-of-another-bankrupt-magazine Randall 'don't call me a failure, it hurts too much' Lane----and when your favorite blogger, The Leveraged Sellout's book bombed so bad he had to retire from blogging...well, little short selling penny stock day trader, the "Ryan Leaf" of the trading world not only was up 197% in 2008 on his Tiny TIM account, turning a $12,415 into $45,000ish right as all the-mainstream-marketers-who-rely-on-the-work-of-others-because-they're-too-busy-marketing like Jimmy Boy Cramer & Bill Miller lost 50%--while becoming the top ranked trader out of 15,000+ on Covestor.com, the only website that verifies a finance freak's investments and trades--not only earned a mid-six-figure income in my first year of blogging...
(don't worry bitches, I'll post my tax return when the time comes just to rub the money I don't even care about, aka FU Money, in your snobby narrow-minded learning-one-hell-of-an-economics-lesson faces, not only received hundreds, already bordering on a thousand testimonials from happy customers to TIMalerts, not only began creating instructional DVDs that are already revolutionizing the sketchy world of trading coaches....wait I don't even need to reread this paragraph to try to make it sense because my rambling doesn't matter, my strategy and business model are boss and all the lies you've been told by senior cubicle monkeys are helping you understand you have little to no future in finance.
But enough small talk, I just felt like saying hello/goodbye and before you leave this joke of industry to ask you for one last favor...I've missed your assumption-making emails in my inbox--now I just have poor people who wanna trade penny stocks (ironically whoa re more solvent than you leverage loving lemmings so please email tim@timothysykes.com so I can have some easy material to blog about...and please write as your-typical-Wall-Street-failure-selves, not as someone who's read all the books in my library, meaning make as many assumptions as possible while doing as little research as possible.
Gratzie,
Timmayyyyy
Posted by Seaman Bodine , Jan 20, 2009 5:53PM
timmaaayyy
is it true steve jobs swallows? did you get your shit checked out, cause he ain't looking all that...
Posted by guest , Jan 20, 2009 5:56PM
They built the house in 1971 and he's been working at Madoff for 30 years and he can't afford the place?
The guy should have saved some cash somewhere.
What? Did he mortgage it to invest in Uncle Bernie's fund??
Posted by guest , Jan 20, 2009 6:18PM
Timmmaaayy,
I am interested on the http://timalerts.com/ on June 18th you had both a buy and short on HYHY. Including shorting it to $2.21 and buying it at $2.26.
Posted by guest , Jan 20, 2009 6:20PM
Timmayyyyy
Ease up on the gay thing ok?
thx
Posted by guest , Jan 20, 2009 6:21PM
Re: Tim Sykes
This reminded me of the time right after my wife and I met Nigel Lawson and I asked her what she thought - all she could say was "he is a nasty little man". Tim, you are certainly no Nigel Lawson but you are indeed a nasty little man.
Posted by guest , Jan 20, 2009 6:22PM
Tim = autistic
Posted by guest , Jan 20, 2009 6:25PM
Serious question to all readers:
If someone was willing to pay you $80k a month, would you be willing to be the biggest douche on the planet?
If not, what would your price be?
Posted by TimothySykes , Jan 20, 2009 6:26PM
Thanks for the heads up on HYHY, the date on one of em is wrong, welcome to manual entering of data...if u sign up for timalerts, u can see all my trades in realtime
Posted by guest , Jan 20, 2009 6:29PM
Have you ever seen that South Park episode where Cartman inherits 1,000,000 and purchases the local theme park called cartman land? Kyle then gets a hemorrhoid and is hospitalized because he loses hope due to Cartman’s undeserved fortune? Tim, unless you improve your attitude, your time will come.
Posted by TimothySykes , Jan 20, 2009 6:32PM
I need to teach people to have an attitude, curently, theyre too trusting of Wall Street scum & now theyre suffering the consequences, please never change!
Posted by guest , Jan 20, 2009 6:35PM
Sykes,
You appear to receive some deviant satisfaction from making a small amount of money from insignificant stocks. This tells me this:
You grew up poor
You value money more than anything
You cannot maintain a relationship
You were probably brow beaten as a child by an authority figure-more than likely molested by a relative
You feel worthless and empty inside
Your parent(s) did not love you
You are unaware of how much of an asshole you appear to others.
You are hilariously immature.
&
You need to STFU
Posted by guest , Jan 20, 2009 6:35PM
prediction for 2009
timmy finds himself embroiled in a penny stock manipulation lawsuit/ investigation
keep talking like this, little girl
painting a target right on your little girl ass
Posted by guest , Jan 20, 2009 6:40PM
Timay,
Have some shame, as a person you are completely irrelevant. You are better off dead.
Posted by guest , Jan 20, 2009 6:50PM
Is Bess still hooking up with Timmayyyyy? Having never seen a picture of her, I would still guess she could do better...
Posted by TimothySykes , Jan 20, 2009 6:54PM
Actually I feel great, not because of the $ but because my biz model is all about profiting by helping teach others...penny stock lawsuit? blehhh i dont take any $ from companies and disclose all my trades ahead of time...i even foreshadow my trades ina a daily premarket watchlist...sticking to more liquid stocks now and holding longer, everything is lining up nicely...which is more than i can say for any of u considering your carcass of an industry!
Posted by TimothySykes , Jan 20, 2009 6:55PM
Actually I feel great, not because of the $ but because my biz model is all about profiting by helping teach others...penny stock lawsuit? blehhh i dont take any $ from companies and disclose all my trades ahead of time...i even foreshadow my trades ina a daily premarket watchlist...sticking to more liquid stocks now and holding longer, everything is lining up nicely...which is more than i can say for any of u considering your carcass of an industry!
Posted by guest , Jan 20, 2009 6:55PM
Tim,
You didn't get the memo? You are Wall Street Scum. Nobody wants to learn from Cartman, they just want to laugh at him. Make money!!! If you want to set an If you want to set an example, show tact and class. Your attitude is not one of a rainmaker, it's one of douchebag. If all you ever want to be is a douchebag with some cash keep it up.
Posted by guest , Jan 20, 2009 6:57PM
Tim,
Bess really doesn't like double posters.
Posted by TimothySykes , Jan 20, 2009 6:59PM
Slow tact and class? uhhh have u ever traded a penny stock before? this isnt some BS M&A deal where its all about presentation because your firm does exactly the same as a hundred others, i deal with the scummiest companies run by the scummiest people on earth...i dont have to be nice, i have to be real...which is what i am, u dont like it, i dont give a flying fuck, u're nearly out of business and mine is surging, i'll run it however the fuck i want (but thank u for the tip!)
Posted by guest , Jan 20, 2009 7:00PM
oh jesus fuck
go away already
Posted by TimothySykes , Jan 20, 2009 7:03PM
no u go away, my stuff is the future, cubicles are so 2006...in a market littered with penny stocks, i am the cryptkeeper, adapt or perish
Posted by guest , Jan 20, 2009 7:03PM
Timmay,
Whenever my wife and I used to watch you on the tube I used to call you the nappy headed ho mo.
Good luck with your DVD. Maybe you can partner with the Video Professor.
Posted by guest , Jan 20, 2009 7:08PM
@15- you're a douche. do you not get that db mocks tim? or are you just that slow. and bess wouldn't touch tim with an 80 foot pole.
Posted by guest , Jan 20, 2009 7:09PM
Tim, if you did not care, you would not feel a need to respond. I also did not tell you how to run your business. I gave you some advice on PR. Your first comment is absurd. Also, you are assuming things. My company is not out of business or close to it. Like you, I have been fortunate enough to have a great year. I also am fortunate enough to NOT have to trade "penny stocks". But hey... one man's trash is another's treasure right? You're welcome for the advice, if you ever are looking for some lessons in social etiquette or a good person to handle your PR, let me know.
Posted by guest , Jan 20, 2009 7:10PM
Tim,
You cannot spell. It is hard to take you seriously.
Posted by guest , Jan 20, 2009 7:13PM
ARS is a dope.
I guess the problem is that reasonably intelligent people have better things to do than to blather on in blogs or on cnbc. (My blathering in this blog noted.)
But seriously, he's a dope.
Posted by guest , Jan 20, 2009 7:15PM
Tim,
I dont know about the rest of the people here, but I would like to smoke your pole.
-male
Posted by guest , Jan 20, 2009 7:18PM
Hey Timm-ay, did you see the AQR/Cliff Asness meltdown on DB?
You know that this is one you can win?
You will ALWAYS be king of the douchebags.
Posted by guest , Jan 20, 2009 7:26PM
I wanna meet you Tim...
All these people saying mean things about you! And you must be doing something right. I like guys with money.
-- Hot Chick
Posted by guest , Jan 20, 2009 7:38PM
Hot Chick, forget about Tim the limp dweeb. This is the kind of man you need:
http://www.blackdynamite.com/chilianddonuts
Posted by guest , Jan 20, 2009 8:00PM
"semenal" events in Portland politics, and the name of the boy is priceless:
http://www.cnn.com/2009/POLITICS/01/20/portland.mayor.affair/index.html
Posted by guest , Jan 20, 2009 8:25PM
What kind of fruity name is "Beau Breedlove"? God, how can some parents be so retarded!
Posted by guest , Jan 20, 2009 8:26PM
@32
Must be related to Craig "Jet up the ass" Breedlove. Always wondered what it would be like to walk through the fudge packing district.
Posted by guest , Jan 20, 2009 8:35PM
Timaay! You are the "Video Professor" of the financial services industry.
Posted by guest , Jan 20, 2009 8:41PM
@34 I have been to Craigs shop. Interesting group of people he has working there. One guy made the ZZ Top guys look like beard pikers.
I hope the old fucker gets another real shot at the record. He is legit.
~Not 32
Posted by guest , Jan 20, 2009 8:55PM
@36
Craigs Wiki says that he sold his last car to Fossett in 2006. Bad choice I guess.
Posted by I am a Dude , Jan 20, 2009 9:44PM
I can't believe DB is still hocking Tim. Isn't there enough business news/gossip to fill these pages and not have to fall back on the penny stock, hump and dump, I got molested from my uncle at my bar mitzva, Tim Sykes?
He fucking sucks moose cock.
Posted by Harald , Jan 20, 2009 11:41PM
CAN WE PLEASE GET A STORY on State street and Bank of NY? What happened to the great crisis coverage that DB had during sept/oct?! Where did it go??!
Remember all the rumors of these two players going bankrupt? Something has to be interesting about their precipitous drop in the market today.
Posted by Anal_yst , Jan 21, 2009 1:15AM
Tim, Tim, Tim,
As I've mentioned previously, I respect your audacity; it takes cajones (or something) to make yourself a target, as you do each and every day.
However, as others have pointed out, you assume that the worst of Wall Street (your "ivy league" LSO-esque type) is representative of ALL of Wall Street, when in fact, this is simply not the case at all.
Secondly, some friendly advice:
You have made it your business this past year or so to constantly and quite brashly tempt fate. Given your own history, I would have hoped you'd learn some humility, since in the end, fate always wins.
I wish you the best of luck, but for your sake, I suggest that, at least to a greater extent than you do now, you let your success speak for itself, instead of rubbing it in everyone's face to spite them.
Good luck, and godspeed.
Posted by TimothySykes , Jan 21, 2009 8:27AM
whaaat i'm totally humble now, ego was so 2006...as for expecting the worst of wall street, yes, there are a few good eggs, but considering i've got thousands of readers whose intelligence is comprabale to michael vick, aka little, its better to teach them to assume everyone is guilty before innocent, that way they cant wreck they little food stamp-esque savings by trusting the wrong guy, understand?
Posted by guest , Jan 21, 2009 11:15AM
yea yea yea thanks for sharing 41
Posted by guest , Jan 21, 2009 11:27AM
@ everyone responding to Tim
You done been trolled.
Honestly, he's too angry to be taken seriously, so why bother?
Posted by guest , Jan 21, 2009 11:38AM
Tim -- You go on about ivy league financial illiteracy, yet you are unable to string coherent English sentences together. As 26 pointed out, it is therefore impossible to take you anyway seriously, and this is before one concerns themselves with what may/may not be decent stock tips. You know what is very funny? You snigger in equal measure about Ivy league and ibankers, but yet act like a stereotypical college frat boy, remarkably ill at ease with himself and continuously excitable. This passive observer deducts that you are entirely unemployable due to your social inadequacies, and that your juvenile mocking of others is a legacy of being bullied throughout your childhood. Give up the pretence and take up some counselling, it may allow you to find some poise and presence instead of this embarrassing faux-pomposity you are so keen to achieve.
Posted by TimothySykes , Jan 25, 2009 1:23PM
just made another $4k today while on vacation, god loves a business based on brutal honesty! suckassss u're in the wrong industry