Earlier this morning, upon hearing that Charlie Gasparino had made a promise to himself (and his underage viewers) not to curse on air ever again, we decided to insert ourselves (and yourselves) into the personal challenge. Without running it by CG, we decided that if he broke the vow before March 1, he had to do something for us (that something TBD), and if he made it to March 1 without a slip, his next night at Elaine’s would on you people. Then this popped into our inbox:
Bess,
I just read your item and wld love to take u up on the bet. There’s just one problem: judging by some of the comments on your posts about me, the typical Dealbreaker reader (a) is unemployed or (b) the kid on the trading desk who is forced to take the female hormones and wear dresses, etc.
As such, i don’t think your readers can afford a night at Elaine’s.
-CG
Burn! But: after getting CG on the horn and assuring him that among them all, DB’s readers could probably swing it, he relented. Which is to say: IT IS ON. We haven’t yet finalized what Chaz will have to do in the event things go our way, so take the rest of the morning/afternoon off to consider it, and I’ll offer him his options after the close.
Elaine’s hasn’t been relevant since ’88
CG! We love u man! C’mon! Bafongool!
If he phucks it up, he should make a short video extolling the virtues of DB readers for exclusive posting here.
If he loses, he should jump into the Hudson, to truly visualize a fluid situation.
Yes, if he screws up, he should have to plug this website.
I’m thinking something like the Vietnamese monk who torched himself to protest the war. Sitting cross-legged out front of the old Lehman HQ with a can of gasoline…
2 cups 1 charlie
@7 beautiful, man. fuckin’ beautiful.
what about gasbags having to provide us dennis kneale in a back alley? i’ve wanted to punch his pointy face for a good 2 years now.
ow charlie! that really hurt! charlie bit my finger!
If I could buy Charlie for what he’s worth and then sell him for what he thinks he’s worth, I could at least buy him a entree at Elaine’s.
The Elaine’s people are probably pissed their name has been brought into this.
How about he has to reval a source for once?
I think a YouTubes type video that CNBC might run with at some point plugging Dealbreaker is the best idea so far.
Chaz helps the cause and DB gets some free advertising.
~SEG
You get the sense that CG would still be going to Studio 54 if that hadn’t closed. How about an on-air rendition of Billy Joel’s “Big Shot” with some sort of ridiculous wardrobe and props.
@lehaighbsc- I’m no CG apologist, but people who rag on him for not revealing sources are idiots. No journalist (or aspirational journalist or “journalist”) ever reveals their sources, or no one would give them information.
@8
FTW
oh, and he should def have to plug DB for the rest of the year on a daily basis, get all the yahoos here in droves, yeeehawww!
do you think gas man is one these cugino’s who implies to everyone that he has mob connections? seems like the type.
gas man – not only could i afford a meal at elaines, i could buy elaines if i felt like it.
(((toot toot)))
Here ya go, Charlie:
http://changing-personal-habits.suite101.com/article.cfm/how_to_stop_cursing
he can buy my next set of extenders, the bitch
/sarcasm
i would bet my left XXX that charlie gasparino has special edition copies of godfather 1, 2 and the shitty one.
charlie – be honest – have you ever furiously masturbated while watching goodfellas?
i bet you have.
This is getting Juicy. And, it just proves that Gasbag pops on to Dealbreaker more than he will ever care to admit. He’s obviously obsessed with what people think about him.
after that mind-numbing blast of chauvanism/homophobia from the cretin, appearing in-drag on-air is the obvious candidate
too over, didn’t hill
If he’s caught smoking a bong, does that count? What about the Meth blow-outs in the bathroom?
watch this for ideas: http://www.cnbc.com/id/27827767
maybe someone in the office should do something with chuckie’s toothbrush that sits at his desk?
Well, since apparently we are all nothing more than a bunch of witless morons for our choice to frequent this site, let’s take ole Chaz’s idea. He curses before the first and he dresses in drag on air, in front of Elaine’s, plugging BL & EP’s uncanny ability to always beat him to the punch on breaking news and then comment on how it is largely in part to DB’s dedicate fan base.
Spencer
you so know charlie is going to knock dennis k the fuck out one day.
“Gasparino, mauled shredded and bleeding walks into that same Alaskan bar late one night a year later and proudly announces, “OK, you bastards, now where’s that Eskimo woman you want me to wrestle???”
~The “Punchline Only” Guy
@23- no because smoking pot is not cursing?
Charlie, you’re not aging well.
I just love Gasparino.
Gazza just defamed and insulted every trans-gender/cross-dressing professional on Wall Street. We are most likely dealing with a serious closet case here. He probably cruises the West Village at night beating up TG Prosties, the sick fuck.
Maybe we should all send CG a bar of soap to wash his mouth out?
awww his head got too big when you sponsored that b’day tribute to him.
that’s it, he’s got to snog dennis neale on air.
i love this part though:
“Bess,
I just read your item and wld love to take u up on the bet. ”
How quickly after the post was that email banged out?
@ 9: Never heard of this Gasparino guy, but you have picked the best way to humiliate a guy named Charlie! I hope he loses, so I can see some news guy get humiliated.
31 -
it’s not gay if you beat the fuck out of heshe after you bust your nut.
I say if he loses, he has to drink 3 bottles of Barolo an hour before he is set to go live in a breaking news segment with Dylan Ratigan.
Whaddaya got, Chazza!
Have him take a long, loud, slurping and wet drink of coffee out of a “don’t short me bro!” mug on the air.
…and bitch slap dennis k. when he gets in arms length.
-BeckyBootFan
34 here. Come to think of it, who knows what Bess and PE look like. If Charlie loses, he has to bite their finger. Hahahahahahaha
At least then I would see something of him. Until he’s on Dealbreaker, he’s dead to me. CNBC? Gimme a break.
1.on air wearing dealbreaker t-shirt
that says:
“i f**ked-up and i didn’t just get this t-shirt”
2. while serving dennis k an espresso saying, “dennis, you are finest reporter of hard facts i know”
3. must turn to camera and say. “bess,
you won”
4. just for laughs must agree/deliver unrestricted youtube rights for segment. . .
If he loses send in a box of douche bags.
For the rest of the year, every one of Charlie’s rumors must be attributed to an anonymous comment on DB.
If he loses there should be no more mention on Gasbags on Dealbreaker and any further CNBC coverage should be exclusively for Dennis Neale.
http://www.fcc.gov/eb/oip/FAQ.html#TheLaw
I wanna know if he is getting his paycheck clipped.
What monetary sanctions has the FCC imposed for violation of its indecency, profanity, and obscenity restrictions? The base monetary sanction for violation of the FCC’s indecency, profanity, and/or obscenity restrictions is $7,000 per violation. The FCC may adjust this monetary sanction upwards, up to a current statutory maximum of $32,500 per violation, based on such factors as the nature, circumstances, extent and gravity of the violation, and, with respect to the violator, the degree of culpability, any history of prior offenses, ability to pay, and such other matters as justice may require.
@42. that punishes us. cruelly.
Make him eat a jar of MAYO live on CNBC, and if he spills any he can use a SHAM-WOW to clean it up.
@42 –> Charlie?
He loses and he has to change his I AM CNBC commercial, starting it out with:
I AM:
A dealbreaker reader
A writer
Son of an iron worker
Son of New York
etc…
@46, this is 42, not gasbagadoughnuts, can’t handle a year of all dk all the time. . .it burns, it itches.
If he loses, he has to go on-air wearing a Snuggie.
If he losses, he should have to give up his shameless self-promotional antics for a month. Namely, he would no longer be permitted to preface his comments by “I broke this earlier today” or anything of the sort. Not extolling his “investigatory” skills to world would make Charlie a dull boy.
I don’t wear dresses anymore. They let me wear nice pant suits from Brooks Brothers for Women.
Gasbag’s biggest fear (and the apparent reason he is so obsessed with Dealbreaker) is that his fellow CNBC colleagues are hopping on and reading some of these Gas-bashing posts – probably the reason for the snickering in the hallways he’s been subjected to lately.
I think if he loses, Bess gets to cock punch him on the air.
How does this effect Dylan Ratigan?
I think having him write a blog post for DB would be a pretty cool outcome. Not sure if that his prize for winning or losing though. Maybe the topic is determined by win or lose.
45 Maybe unintentional, but that’s a good one. We Italians find mayonaise vile and unhealthy – has something to do with our upbringing, the way we were taught to eat. I still can’t stand the look or smell of the stuff. I gag during that TV commercial where the little kid has some mayo on the end of his nose.
@55. *that’s*… not “that”. *that’s*. ah, fck it.
oh, I lose.
If he looses: A day at the desk with Dennis Kneale.
@49- Winner!
@49 is on to something but it should also have a DB logo.
I wouldn’t drop a nickel to buy this self-involved blow hard a meal.
And if I hear one more thing about Fat Charlie’s dad and his union experience I am going to blow chunks.
Finally, I do not think he should disparage the readers of his source for stories. Just rude and ungrateful.
I say Chaz have to wear drag and go to a gay strip club. All taped on video.
Bess,
I think the answer is quite obvious. If CG slips up, he should eat his words and go on air donning the make up and female dress from his own zinger. While I would normally appreciate his clever punch, given these stressful times I feel compelled to punch back while I sweat on a trading desk and he sits on his laurels in a cushy studio. As the designated trader on my desk that has to wear female attire, I would personally feel victorious at the sight of Chaz in a pencil skirt and pumps. Of course I am an actual female and don’t need hormones to fit into a woman’s 6, but I think my fellow traders would appreciate it none the less.
Stone Cold
@ 62
Yours on CG fitting into a size 6, let alone a pencil skirt
Erin Burnett better make sure her locker is secure tonight, otherwise Charles is likely to break in and snatch one of her pencil skirts.
i’m with 58. a day on the desk with dk will clearly end with punching
I’d really like to see that “cuntry reporter” wearing a pink I
Why does it seem that some here on DB (posters and writers) have an unhealthy obsession with CG? How about if he loses the bet he stops getting coverage for a year and we’re all relieved to not hear from or about him.
[there is only so much joy one can get from looking at a train wreck..then again maybe not].
Flame On….
He wears a dress on air!!
Please remind me: why would we want CG to stop swearing at DK?
If he loses he sings Tainted Love on Fast Money.
CG — i may not have a job — but if the labor department doesn’t count me —
then i am not unemployed……………
Has to wear “don’t short me bro” tee on air.
Gazza Bear: I still (heart) you, no matter what the bitches say,
Tina B.
Gasparino, if we catch you rummaging through our clothes & makeup when you lose this bet, you’re a dead man. DEAD.
Maria, Erin, Becky, K-Fine, Melissa
By the way, Becky just saw a one-legged Trannie outside with a baseball bat – looking for you?
Hey, Charlie. You gay!
Mr. Gasparino clearly has absorption-with-self issues. There is treatment for this. I’d like to go over this in detail on March 1st. Charlie, please have your Network call my Network.
Dr. Phil
#74 – yeah, I saw that Tranny too. Apparently unemployed with a big grudge
He needs to tell the Aristocrats joke on air, using himself, Neale, two midgets, and three dogs and a box turtle.
I got it.
He has to officially change his name to “Dildo Gasparino.”
Aw f*ck, Dildo, you should just change it regardless, you blowhard loser.
Just wait till the class-action suit of Unemployed Wall Street Trannie/Cross Dressers vs. Gasparino is filed; not only for defamation of character and slander, but there is also a possible violation of their civil rights going on here. They have a right to electronic social networking too!
who the fuck is Gasparino and why the fuck would we ever fucking want him to swear less?
I’ll put up a dinner for 4 at ALTO or Convivo . . . and you can check with, Frank Wess, Jimmy Owens, Toshiko Akiyoshi, Lew Tabackin, George Garzone, Gene Perla, or Wycliffe Gordon as to whether I can make good on it
I may be unemployed, but I am STILL getting your tax dollars Gasbag.
You win the bet, I will take you to The Eagle in nyc. Show you what us crossdressers do.