Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 7:34PM

The first rule of Wall Street is always take the money.

26K = 1 month bender + 1 ticket home.

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 7:36PM

I don't understand the "bonus" term in this article. Isn't the offer leave now and get severance equal to one month + $26k. There's no bonus here - this is severance.

A bonus is for outstanding work to reward one for a job well done, etc. etc.

Just a refresher since most seem to have forgotten exactely what and who qualifies for a bonus.

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 7:38PM

Take the CASH! Summer is just around the corner. $26K is enough for a summer share.

Boink hot chicks all summer. Worry about getting a job in the fall.

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 7:39PM

how much is a train ticket back to iowa?

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 7:39PM

Use this to help decide:

http://youtube.com/watch?v=GqH21LEmfbQ&feature=related

Those were the days.

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 7:39PM

does this mean ALL IBD analysts were offered this or poorly performing analysts were offered this?

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 7:39PM

Second rule of Wall St: you DO NOT talk about Wall St.

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 7:41PM

they offered the same amount whether you're a first or a third year? That is GREAT for 1st years. AWFUL for third years. Wideclops is such a b1tch

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 7:45PM

can you imagine how cheap apartments are going to get, especially in those tacky high rise rental buildings on 1st ave?

or how about hoboken?

what do you think? like 700 - 900 a bedroom?

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 7:45PM

You could use the 26K to rock the Casbah.

http://youtube.com/watch?v=OAkfHShATKY&feature=related

shareef dont like it
Lock the taskbar!
Lock the taskbar!

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 7:47PM

we should do an over/under on how many restaurants with $100+ tasting menus will close this year.

any handicappers out there?

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 7:48PM

@12

that was friggin terrible.

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 7:52PM

oh, the humanity!

who will buy all those bottles for tacky eatern bloc whores at the basement called tenjune?

sell mortimer, sell!

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 7:53PM

@14
no way. The songs a classic.

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 7:55PM

@10 so much for 'years of service/experience'. Unless you have photos of a married MD getting a lap dance you are history. Either now, with 26K or at year end with 0.

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 7:57PM

17 - this is the first time since they started keeping track of this crap where the lower end is relatively stable and the high end is getting destroyed...

and i mean destroyed.

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 8:02PM

take the 14 grand (after tax), walk on your apt. lease and student loans, and head back to utah where you belong.

make sure you give nyc the middle finger salute as your plane departs from EWR.

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 8:03PM

Asses capped at $500K per Leisman.

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 8:09PM

21 - my friend can shoot a hard boiled out of her bahgina almost 9 feet.

http://www.brownstoner.com/brownstoner/archives/2009/02/rents_falling_i.php

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 8:12PM

@15 - Trading Places is always in good taste...

1/2/3's got the same package? I doubt that - Dealbreaker, check your sources...

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 8:14PM

"Ms. Hsiao, 23, and her roommate, David Liu, 24, settled on a two-bedroom two-bathroom apartment in Midtown on the West Side. It was listed for $4,200. They offered $3,650 a month and were accepted. After one month free and a $2,000 signing bonus, the total came to $3,215 monthly, and they did not have to pay the broker’s fee." - NY Times.

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 8:16PM

hi 25,

thanks.

this one's even more apropos:

"I had the most absurd nightmare.
I was poor and no one liked me. I lost my job, I lost my house, Penelope hated me, and it was all because of this terrible, awful Negro."

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 8:22PM

hi 28,

what's nice about it?

i own a crap load of rentals all over town and i promise the rental market is collapsing.

that's not so nice for me.

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 8:27PM

wow id take that in a HEARTBEAT, half the kids in my analyst class are trying to figure out a way to get canned and still get their severance

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 8:27PM

@12 that was awesome

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 8:28PM

Take the money bitches!!!!!

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 8:33PM

cluz: whats twc?

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 8:42PM

arrrh a schweet an shauwa pork all over 26's head

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 8:44PM

hi investorcluzo,

i'll acquiesce slightly to your point. mostly because you seem for real.

and competent.

things really are different this time.

eh, i'm not in any plight. most of the crap i own is 2/3 bedroom stuff, and it was all purchased prior to 1999 when i was making "bank".

god, i hate that expression.

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 8:48PM

i for one could use a little break from all these snot nose punks running around the meatpacking district waving black cards around like a big pair of balls. go back to michigan and get a job at your dads carwash. please.

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 9:06PM

27, classic.

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 9:44PM

Waah! Wall Street says $500,000 cap on executive pay is too little! You a-holes ran the bank into the ground and then you demanded the US tax payer bail you out to the tune of hundreds of billions of dollars. Be grateful you have a job.

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 9:47PM

http://www.nytimes.com/2009/02/04/business/04pay.html?ref=business

Wall Street CEOs capped at $500,000.

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 9:52PM

Take a look at the WSJ "breaking news" banner and then answer this question. It's over, man. Take the money.

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 9:54PM

42 - this is just the beginning.

obama has designs on limiting all sorts of public company compensation to government pay grades.

and he'll confiscate money from private business through taxes.

and everyone thought spread the wealth around was a joke.

when i first posted the same exact quote on this blog prior to the election i was heckled.

repatriating dollars from tax havens, bring back the estate tax, etc.

you ain't seen nothing yet.

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 9:56PM

Agree w/ 43.

Take the money.

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 9:58PM

"you fucked up, you trusted us"

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 9:58PM

can someone please explain to me why wall street was so supportive of obama?

is it white/jewish liberal guilt or something?

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 10:00PM

@4: bonus: from the Latin, a good thing.

Not a performance bonus, not an incentive bonus, just a classic bonus: it's yours if you quit, otherwise it's off the table when we fire your ass.

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 10:04PM

why the fook did obama pick a fight with rush limbaugh?

bad. move.

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 10:05PM

was this for all analysts in IBD?

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 10:16PM

Randolph, your brother is having a heart attack.

Mortimer: Fuck him! Get back in there and sell, you idiot!

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 10:20PM

what about incoming analysts expected in july? any word on S&T?

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 10:23PM

@52 I suspect a lot of the incoming class will have their offers rescinded. Read the fine print.

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 10:23PM

Will someone please explain how giving loans to undeserving debtors (eg people who need political pressure to get a loan) is better than giving bonuses to employees? Even if they're undeserving of bonuses (see: 2008 FY results), at least the employees who get the bonuses would be more likely to stay around and continue working, hopefully making the firm money, whereas the political borrowing class probably won't repay the loan (remember why they need the political help getting the loan?)

never mind the fact that an employed person who gets a bonus is more likely to spend the money than the cash strapped political borrower (who will now be in an even worse position, thanks to the additional borrowing beyond what a rational lender would consider prudent

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 10:24PM

are you serious? why would they offer it to 3rd yrs when they are supposed to be rolling out of the program in 6 months? no questions about it, cash in and get out while there is money left to pay you a buyout!! I am not at morgan, but if my bank offers me that I won't think twice

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 10:31PM

Today's offer was just for second and third years. Third years were offered 10K more than seconds.

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 10:31PM

@ 56, so are first years getting their buyout offer tomorrow?

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 10:33PM

This is like bad odds Deal or No Deal. The next "offer" will be worse.

Your dream is dead. You can either waste five years of your youth trying and failing to pursue a career path that no longer exists, or you can move on with your life.

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 10:33PM

wall st does not pay for past performance. Why would you ever do that, unless a pimp or bookie was gonna beat your ass. what they pay for is the promise of repeating that perfoamnce next year, while at the same time muttering some catch phrase about "past perfomance not being indicative..."

yeah 1br luxury high rises are going to rent int the 2000-2500 for a few years. the sooner we get tot that level, the better for everyone.

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 10:38PM

@60 a bonus is a bribe to take the same crap for another year.

If they don't want you to stay, they don't give you a bonus end of story.

26K at least buys you the proverbial 'pot to piss in'.

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 10:46PM

Take the cash and ride off into the proverbial sunset.

Calgreedy

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 10:49PM

47 Thats easy. You always back the one that's gonna win. That plus two words: Sarah Palin.

Obama's not gonna make things bad for Wall Street. They already made it bad themselves. See Lloyd Blankfein two years ago, saying that greed is in fact bad and needs to stop cause its not going to sit well with the masses.

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 10:50PM

is this a record for late night comments? What's going on here.

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 10:54PM

So what happens now? Is it just CEOs or everyone down the chain? How does this just not cause a massive exodus from bailout recipients to non-bailout recipients? Any firm that didn't take bailout cash can scale up to 2-3x their current headcount over the next couple years while the bailed out firms wither and die...

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 10:55PM

Take the money and invest in MBS.

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 10:55PM

I feel sorry for the people who stay at MS. Management knows you'll do anything, I mean A-NY-THING they want you to do. This is a weed-out process. Get rid of the young people with self-respect and transferable skills. MS don't need 'em no more.

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 11:02PM

66 Or they can pay the bailout cash back. The reality is that things are beyond terrible out there. There's just not the same need for people, cause not much is happening.

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 11:07PM

@64

Did Blankfein say greed is bad before or after he paid himself $70,324,352 last year.

He said it, you bought it. Tool.

Palin? Yeah, she wanted lower taxes and less government, naturally that didn't sit well with low income 9-5ers like you did it?

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 11:11PM

@64 - was it this Lloyd Blankfein lecturing in greed and the unwashed masses?

"It's been a rough stretch for every banking CEO, and Goldman Sachs chief Lloyd Blankfein is no exception. While he did very well for himself in 2007—he took home a total of $67 million—he opted to forgo a bonus in 2008, and the $465 million in Goldman stock he owned at the beginning of 2008 was worth just $127 million by the end of the year. This probably explains why Blankfein's charitable contributions for 2008 fell off a cliff, too."

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 11:11PM

just not for a few years .. when they can find another job

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 11:14PM

whats really scary is that this MS is turning out to be one of the better run banks.. absolutely no one is safe, not even the cheapest workers at a "top" bank

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 11:25PM

70 Sarah Palin is a stupid hillbilly. She runs a state that's lucky enough to have natural resources and therefore has essentially a negative income tax - it collects royalties and distribute them to the citizens. Not rocket science. Despite all that, Alaska is the biggest recipient of all of federal largesse. So much for Palin the fiscal conservative.

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 11:28PM

Markopolos will testify b/f house com. on financial services and advise them to overhaul SEC staff and hire "foxes" that will earn incentive-based compensation keyed to the $ amount of enforcement fines levied by the commission on frauds each exposes (I kid you not - see page 40). I care not to address the merits of this ridiculous idea (the disclosure that he feared for his life and the special ops/military overtones had me wondering about this guy, but he totally lost me with that one). But given how lost gov. has been in this mess, they might just take his suggestion. The result: complete role reversal - regulators earning bonuses and bankers earning salaries.

Laid off bankers may want to get a head start and fax resumes to the SEC - put the name of a suspected fraud (i.e., the last deal you worked on) in the subject line along with the FOX.

BTW, there already is a regulator that is based on the model Markopolist suggests: the class action securities fraud plaintiffs bar.

JO Legal

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 11:29PM

I hear the army is hiring.

Oh wait, that would mean doing real work. NM!

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 11:31PM

75 They'll find something engaging and interesting but no way its going to have the payoff that Wall Street does. Now for the usual response: OH BUT IT WONT HAVE THE HOURS AND THE PRESSURE EITHER, WHICH IS WHY I DESERVE ALL I GET. Or deserved all I used to get. To which is say BS.

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 11:33PM

@66

The none-bailout firms are getting run out of business. How can i compete with 2.5% money?

Anything I borrow is 6, 7 or more % to fund assets at 50-60% advance.

If you can issue FDIC backed paper, you are funding at fake LIBOR plus 100 (2.5%).

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 11:33PM

It really is a mystery why New Yorkers voted for Obama - after all, Sarah Palin would be a wonderful president in the middle of the Depression!

Just think how Wall Street would flourish under her expert guidance.

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 11:34PM

It really is a mystery why New Yorkers voted for Obama - after all, Sarah Palin would be a wonderful president in the middle of the Depression!

Just think how Wall Street would flourish under her expert guidance. This whole GOP approach of selecting dumb figureheads and letting Wall Street run amok has certainly worked out sooo well for America.

Posted by guest , Feb 03, 2009 11:44PM

Definitely for first year people, it makes sense to me to take the money. Up side will be very limited for the next year or two minimum. Because this is for tax year 2009, you won't pay hardly any taxes on it due to low income. That is 26K cash in pocket (make sure they don't withhold tax). Plus unemployment and Obama stimulus coming down, you'd be stupid to keep working.

Posted by guest , Feb 04, 2009 12:01AM

these are decently smart kids usually the top of their college classes... they can do something else with their life and be successful.

Posted by guest , Feb 04, 2009 12:12AM

@82 - what would that be? start a business? where are you going to get financing? work somewhere else? what markets are growing right now? the only options are academia, the public sector, and nonprofit sector. none of which are suitable for everyone.

Posted by guest , Feb 04, 2009 12:17AM

What are the options for a smart, entreneurial type to make paper now?

Posted by guest , Feb 04, 2009 12:19AM

Give me regulated anarchy, or give me death.

If the government existed in a much smaller form, we would never be in this mess. And I will forever stand by that.

Welcome to the welfare State.

Posted by guest , Feb 04, 2009 12:20AM

Today's group of mass Banker layoffs are worse off than the 9/11-Tech Bust crowd... At least then you new the jobs were coming back... Now, it's scary. Take the money, break your lease and get back to school for an advanced degree...

Go to med school. Baby Boomers shat on the world and now we're going to have to wipe their asses as they drool off into the sunset...

Posted by guest , Feb 04, 2009 12:51AM

@86 spot-on. Baby boomers are fucking us up big time.

Posted by guest , Feb 04, 2009 12:53AM

i'm sure i'll get more snippy remarks than actual responses from the gallery, but where does one go if one accepts the buy-out?

Posted by guest , Feb 04, 2009 1:05AM

@88 you go to D.C. If you want to stay in finance follow the money. Used to be London, Hong Kong, Shanghai, Sao Paulo. Now it's D.C.

Posted by guest , Feb 04, 2009 1:06AM

82 - lots of countries have "decently" (wtf does that even mean) smart kids.

the ussr and red china were able build nukes during communism. their rocket scientists were paid similar wages to janitors. if they didn't perform, they went to a gulag.

once in a while a nato nation would be able to pay off some crooked russian- jewish kgb chief enough money to let one of those rocket scientists gain asylum.

so what exactly is your fucking point, comrade?

Posted by guest , Feb 04, 2009 1:14AM

86 gets it.

baby boomer are selfish motherfuckers and have controlled politics and economics since the voting rights act of 1964.

60's counter culture and academia worship -check

70's inflation and white city flight - check

80's peak earning years, lower taxes - check

90's stock market speculation for retirement and a return to urban centers - check

00's return back to the democrat party for free government shit - check

doomed.

00's

Posted by guest , Feb 04, 2009 1:17AM

the only place you'll be able to make money the next 10 years will be pharma and health care.

boomers will spend their last cent to live one day longer and get a hard-on.

Posted by guest , Feb 04, 2009 1:28AM

91,

Is there any question "doom" is inevitable? Most talked about topics today: Christian Bale's "mean" words & apologists re: Geithner and Daschle.

We may cum all over the place when speaking of academia, but it's simply an institution we ink onto our resumes.

We're all so fucking smart. It's a burden, our superior intelligence.

Posted by guest , Feb 04, 2009 1:48AM

how about going into counseling, i got a internet porn addiction i cant kick.

Posted by guest , Feb 04, 2009 2:23AM

@94- Why are you trying to kick it? You should be grateful that you've found something so fulfilling. I know I am.

Don't kick it, just beat it.

SPODE

Posted by guest , Feb 04, 2009 2:57AM

legalize weed

Posted by guest , Feb 04, 2009 4:25AM

it's all the babyboners fault. punch the next person over 60 you see in the face so they know we're on to them

Posted by guest , Feb 04, 2009 6:01AM

"we exist to fight the immoral transfer of trillions in debt from private banks onto the backs of future generations. If not stopped there will be $10 trillion of debt created by our government in the next five years. and most of it given to the banks. That amount is equal to our entire national debt for our first 232 years as a nation.

We're here to keep tabs on the heist. To provide an official daily record of the generational pillaging."

http://dailybail.com/home/2009/2/3/bailout-news-ww-ii-edition-taxpayer-iwo-jima.html

congrats on your best month ever dealbreaker. you're good at what you do.

Posted by guest , Feb 04, 2009 7:30AM

41 -
Some may think Obama has made the right move here but if he was not so eager to throw public money at the firms in the first place the market would be able to arrive at a fair value soon enough and judging by the average level of intelligence demonstrated here that would be a long way south of 100K never mind 500K0.

Posted by guest , Feb 04, 2009 7:30AM

@92 - That was fucking awesome - sums up the selfish and, self-destructive, baby boomer crowd: "boomers will spend their last cent to live one day longer and get a hard-on."

Posted by guest , Feb 04, 2009 7:49AM

good. if you f'ed up a company, you shouldn't get substantial pay.

why the hell waggoner, among others, even HAS a job is beyond me.

and as others posted, if you bring in money at these firms, you're doing far better than the CEO in cash.

what this should do is shake out the people who are living off of (or because of) wide spreads frauds and lies.

Posted by guest , Feb 04, 2009 8:04AM

wells wachovia blocked db a pretty db move from a db bank

Posted by guest , Feb 04, 2009 8:22AM

Not sure why US is the only country that taxes people who worked abroad. It prevents me from applying for citizenship. Freaking baby boomers want to stiff everywhere.

Posted by guest , Feb 04, 2009 8:25AM

Take the money and run! Next window will be out the door with no money.

Posted by guest , Feb 04, 2009 8:38AM

@103
The way things are sucking around here citizenship should be the last thing on your or my mind. I'll say one thing for the UK: They certainly aren't chasing me around the world demanding taxes. What a crock.

Posted by guest , Feb 04, 2009 8:57AM

Was this offer made to every analyst, 1st, 2nd, and 3rd yr?
Can anyone from Morgan Stanley confirm this - it seems a little desperate for a firm that is still treading water above the rest.

Posted by guest , Feb 04, 2009 8:57AM

Was this offer made to every analyst, 1st, 2nd, and 3rd yr?
Can anyone from Morgan Stanley confirm this - it seems a little desperate for a firm that is still treading water above the rest.

Posted by guest , Feb 04, 2009 9:06AM

This isn't a choice kids - take the money now or get pushed.

Posted by guest , Feb 04, 2009 9:43AM

This is decent money - They should take it. 1st and 2nd year analyst's barely add any value or profit to Pnl. I was baffled by huge bonuses (more than $25K) given to 1st and 2nd analysts.

I can understand huge bonuses paid to people who bring in huge revenues.

Posted by guest , Feb 04, 2009 9:52AM

@107, 56 says this offer is for 2nd and 3rd years

Posted by guest , Feb 04, 2009 11:50AM

110,

What happens to the first years.

Posted by guest , Feb 04, 2009 11:51AM

I don't understand what would happen if every analyst decided to take it. There would be no more analysts left at all!

Posted by guest , Feb 04, 2009 12:31PM

Re: tacky eatern bloc whores

Well they look like models

Beats pasty/chubby ann-taylor white UES/UWS twats....

Gotta admit that

Posted by guest , Feb 04, 2009 12:37PM

Any reliable info on offers to start in MS ibd this summer?

Posted by guest , Feb 04, 2009 1:26PM

go to law school

Posted by guest , Feb 04, 2009 2:19PM

62 - Billy Ray. unbelievable credibility killer.

Posted by guest , Feb 04, 2009 2:34PM

Yeah @85, stand by that forever. Forever while you drive your safety tested car on those federally maintained roads, drinking that clean water, on the way to that bank with your federally insured accounts, sending your kids to those government provided schools, with a federally/state funded emergency room in case you ever need medical care for you or your family in a hurry. Yup, us Comunistas, we’re the badguys.

God forbid you ever need a bite of that gubment cheese.

Posted by guest , Feb 04, 2009 5:10PM

111, I don't know

Posted by guest , Feb 06, 2009 5:42AM

So first year analysts who joined in the fall are getting the same amount of cabbage as a 3rd year analyst who slaved away for 3 years??? Forget about it!!

Would recommend taking the money to A1s but for the A2s, A3s not so much (unless they get more)

Hopefully A2s and A3s can follow the final rule of Wall Street. If it's your first night you have to fight!