And when I say “shoot this poison into your face,” you shoot this poison into your face. Or don’t, it’s really your call. Only those of you interested in finding/keeping a job should listen. You wanna be a working girl, boys? You’re going to have to start acting like one. In a fabulous piece of service journalism today, the Financial Times suggests that you, my little boy(girl)s, hightail it to the nearest plastic surgeon and get yourselves some Botox.
According to Peter Burling gainful employment is all about “look[in] good– fresh and bright” and not “tired and stressed out.” And if you don’t think your competition is already there, how wrong you are. By cosmetic surgeon Cap Lesesne’s estimate, “There are definitely more business guys coming in and they have very focused demands. They are worried about their job futures and their professional longevity. [Typical male patients] might be in their mid-forties. They’re fairly successful and they’re looking to work into their sixties.” And if you really want to guard against joining the unemployment line, start dressing like a total whore, and remember, no one ever lost their job, or didn’t get a call back, for accidentally shoving their breasts in the boss’s, or interviewer’s face.
Use the photo above as a guide, Men of Dealbreaker. That should be you on the left.
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Is tht why nancy pelosi’s neck is colored to look like hair?
Am I gay if this post made me horny?
Sal Sharton
Anything that brings back trading assistants like Salomon used to have is a good thing. Nothing wrong with a winsome young lady providing some morale boosting on the trading floor with the use of a short skirt and push-up bra.
Bess, you have fantastic legs. I’m impressed.
@3- you a little slow today? this is about MEN getting botox/dressing like they mean it, not women.
They’re fairly successful and they’re looking to work into their sixties – losers
And what’s up with the guy’s shoes in the picture? Typical american wanker.
does that mean we go long armani/zenga/whatever and short jos a bank/syms, or vice-versa?
So, short Zenga, long Syms/Jos A Bank, or vice-versa, I’m not quite sure which, but certain its one or the other…
“and they’re looking to work into their
sixties”
I’m pretty sure that doesn’t describe anyone here Bess…
But my tether will show.
@9
You have inadvertantly stumbled upon the whole cause of the mess we now find ourselves in. The whole idea of “I’m going to retire in 30′s, 40′s, etc., and then “do what I really want to do” is the root cause of a ridiculous compensation system on Wall Street that led a whole generation of self-seekers to believe it is attainable on a large scale without inflicting imbalances. It is not. Not that long ago, when the word “firm” still had the meaning it implies, they were partnerships that provided a very comfortable living, but the cash-out was not until retirement in your sixties and seventies.
But that was back when the word “work” was defined as “work.” I see no victims anywhere, only just desserts.
Zegna…not Zenga. Anal_yst, I am disappointed, I thought you were gay.
@12
1. Typo
2. Sorry to disappoint, I am not.
What a bunch of Nonsense!!!
nope. naw. *hells* no, it just ain’t gonna work. guy takes his oxblood loafer off and rubs his sweaty socked foot under the table on the leg/crotch of the guy/gal sitting across from him?
yecch. you know how it’s adorable and really ultra-hot in a ‘come do me now’ sort of way when a woman wears a mens button-down shirt and little white socks and nothing else? or when a babe drinks milk from the bottle and erotically spills it down her front, like in ’9-1/2′ weeks? or when a babe does that sexy little semi-orgasmic ‘hug herself’ move? or – if she’s feeling bold and frisky – rubs a seductive finger over the rim of her glass; runs a sexy finger over her blood-red lips; twirls an evocative finger into her warm pretty little mouth? “yum”, right?
yeah, well, if a *MAN* were to do any of that, he’d just look like freakin’ IDIOT. or a will farrell sketch on saturday night live. (or so i’m told. i of course have no personal knowledge of this.)(my story, and i’m sticking to it.)
it cracks me up when women whine about how tough they have it nowdays.
nope. naw. *hells* no, it just ain’t gonna work. guy takes his oxblood loafer off and rubs his sweaty socked foot under the table on the leg/crotch of the guy/gal sitting across from him?
yecch. you know how it’s adorable and really ultra-hot in a ‘come do me now’ sort of way when a woman wears a mens button-down shirt and little white socks and nothing else? or when a babe drinks milk from the bottle and erotically spills it down her front, like in ’9-1/2′ weeks? or when a babe does that sexy little semi-orgasmic ‘hug herself and shiver a little’ move? or – if she’s feeling bold and frisky – rubs a seductive finger over the rim of her glass; runs a sexy finger over her blood-red lips; twirls an evocative finger into her warm pretty little mouth? “yum”, right?
yeah, well, if a *MAN* were to do any of that, he’d just look like freakin’ IDIOT. or a will farrell sketch on saturday night live. (or so i’m told. i of course have no personal knowledge of this.)(my story, and i’m sticking to it.)
it cracks me up when women whine about how tough they have it nowdays.
@16- “yeah, well, if a *MAN* were to do any of that, he’d just look like freakin’ IDIOT. or a will farrell sketch on saturday night live.”
really? cause i thought this post was being totally serious in its suggestion that male dealbreaker readers start dressing slutty and shoving their BREASTS in the boss’s face.
15/16,
What do you think this is? Penthouse Letters? My screen’s foggy like a Snoop Dogg video.
@17 ITS TRUE ONLY IN THE COLONIES WOULD PEOPLE WEAR THAT KIND OF UGGGLY SHOES
I am a laid off MD at a prestigious bulge bracket bank, I want to look like this http://blogs.news.com.au/images/uploads/jacko_thumb.jpg
@20
Finally a Brit with an attitude. Normally they do nothing but shit on themselves and their country. Welcome to the colonies. How’s the old bitch in the palace? What about her kids? Such overachievers……
Paranoia developed among the older workers, who would dye their hair to look younger so as not to be laid off.
http://culturesocietypraxis.org/index.php/csp/article/view/57/54
Why has nobody ripped on #11, or Wilford Brimley, yet?
Are your diabetes acting up again? Go eat some Quaker Oats, fall asleep to Matlock and shut the F up.
Don’t be dissin’ my man Matlock. He’s one Thoreauian dude.
I am not sure my boss would enjoy it if I shoved my breasts in his face, but what the hell, I’ll give it a shot.
Ty Webb: “I was born to love you / I was born to lick your face / I was born to rub you / but you were born to rub me first /… What do you say we take this out on the patio?”
In all fairness and disclosure…..Maria Bartiromo has better looking legs.
@20, brown shoes + blue non pin-striped suit is actually workable
29 Absolutely, but they need to be expensive brown lace up dress shoes, not bass weejuns like in this pic.
It’s the color of the shoes more than the style, though I agree with banning Bass and Payless.
Light brown and tan shoes are not to go with navy suits. Only dark brown, laces or no, though I go with laces.
And the guy’s pant’s are 2 inches too short at the inseam.
Oh, and for the Brit, nice teeth.
29/30/31 Either you are women or doing a great job of playing the part.
@32 with that attitude, it will be a long time until you get to be with a woman you didn’t pay for.
@23: have you even read that article? I can’t believe it got published in a “journal,” even one written and “peer-reviewed” by Cal State Monterey Bay students. It wouldn’t even get a B- in a freshman writing class at any legitimate university, that’s for sure.
It’s that kind of intellectual laziness and lack of rigor that makes all these post-colonialist leftists into parodies of themselves.
http://culturesocietypraxis.org/index.php/csp/article/view/57/54