CNBC reports that John Mack has been the only bank CEO, that they're aware of, to pick up the results of his firm's stress test. He apparently showed up "in a silver Audi," met with Fed officials for about an hour and "left without comment or fanfare." So far Blankfein, Dimon, et al are nowhere to be found,* but if someone would get off their asses and take a walk down to Ulysses, we could surely find them.
*Perhaps suggesting they've banded together in a concerted effort to give the impression they don't give a fuck about these meaningless things, or maybe they do but just got too bombed at lunch on Stone Street.
Posted by mrpink , Apr 24, 2009 3:44PM
LOL Bess! 22" Rimz!
-mrp
Posted by guest , Apr 24, 2009 3:45PM
If he rolled up on rims, then the health of MS is that of MS..multiple sclerosis.
If he rolled up on a benz, then the health of MS is that of MS...Microsoft.
But!
Since he rolled up in an Audi..a silver one to boot!...then the health of MS is that of MS...menstrual sickness.
Gross.
CODE PINK!
FUCK YEAH!!!!!!!!!
Posted by guest , Apr 24, 2009 3:47PM
He showed up, jerked off in a cup, they counted his boys, gave him a thumbs up sign and he walked out the door, off to go smoke a cigar and have a brandy for a job well done.
Posted by guest , Apr 24, 2009 3:52PM
Well done on the tags Bess.
Posted by guest , Apr 24, 2009 3:54PM
He showed up in an old Audi 5000, hit the brakes to slow and accelerated right into Geithner and Bernanke.
Posted by guest , Apr 24, 2009 3:57PM
Although ramming into the front of the building in an early 80's Audi 5000 with unintended accelration issues would be boss.
Posted by guest , Apr 24, 2009 3:58PM
@6 - agreed!
Posted by guest , Apr 24, 2009 4:01PM
Mack has an A8, seen him driving it a bunch of times...
Posted by guest , Apr 24, 2009 4:04PM
Bess, will you be hitting up Ulysses this fine afternoon? I think i might go there in an hour. Why don't you bring your laptop down there and take advantage of the WiFi and I'll get you a kettle and tonic or whatever you drink.
Posted by guest , Apr 24, 2009 4:10PM
@9- vodka gimlets.
Posted by guest , Apr 24, 2009 4:14PM
get a gibson martini
why does John Mack not have a driver?
What does it mean.....want to see a weird site? go to www.whatdoesitmean.com
Posted by guest , Apr 24, 2009 4:16PM
Porterhouse, there's a brown Audi parked in my parking space. Get a tow truck over here and have it hauled away immediately.
Posted by guest , Apr 24, 2009 4:19PM
Bess, I thought you of all people would know what a rim-job was worth.
Posted by guest , Apr 24, 2009 4:21PM
If Mack added to his collection with a new R8 V10 TDI, he would at least be able to provide evidence that some TARP money went to a noble cause -- crusing for trustfund hunnies scammed by BM.
Posted by Anal_yst , Apr 24, 2009 4:21PM
I had Mack for a TT kinda guy, myself, but hey, if he rolls a r8 v10 on HRE's (or equivalent), I'd eat my words
Posted by guest , Apr 24, 2009 4:22PM
@ 12 - classic line from a great movie
Posted by guest , Apr 24, 2009 4:24PM
Jesus, it is 4:20pm. How long do we have to wait for the Obama portfolio numbers?!!!
Posted by guest , Apr 24, 2009 4:24PM
How you know you are in midst of a major asset bubble:
A. It costs more money up front to buy a car than it does to buy a home
B. IU graduates are getting jobs as investment bankers
C. You take investment advice from some crazy guy with his sleeves rolled up
Posted by guest , Apr 24, 2009 4:25PM
@17- don't encourage it.
Posted by guest , Apr 24, 2009 4:30PM
@19
I demand a live ticker on Dealbreaker for the Obama portfolio.
Posted by Anal_yst , Apr 24, 2009 4:38PM
@14
Good look
Posted by guest , Apr 24, 2009 4:40PM
my money's on an A8L
Posted by guest , Apr 24, 2009 4:54PM
@20
please STFU
Posted by guest , Apr 24, 2009 4:57PM
Pussy in my lap, bird in the sack. Furrr in my cap, fur furrr in my cap.
Posted by Bess Levin , Apr 24, 2009 5:03PM
@9- not today, no, though I am considering Work From Ulysses Fridays during the warm weather months.
Posted by HAM05 , Apr 24, 2009 5:18PM
think if one were to sent a coworker an email saying one was going to shit all over ones directors office walls, and then did, they could somehow track it?
hypothetically
Posted by guest , Apr 24, 2009 5:24PM
@HAM- ask the Merrill guy.
Posted by guest , Apr 24, 2009 5:49PM
@12, don't you people have homes?
Posted by guest , Apr 24, 2009 6:01PM
@HAM05- WIFI at Starbucks paid with cash wearing a baseball cap and never looked into the security cameras and used a personal computer with an old hard drive that was destroyed...
I don't see a problem.
Posted by guest , Apr 24, 2009 6:06PM
Ah..the hapless DB ass-talking car guys
The A8 is the Betamax of exotic cars
-Its slower than a 911 Turbo
-Its already been replaced w/the A10
-Its just ugly
-the A6 RS is not much slower, +2 doors
-The Gallardo is the same (Audi owns Lambo) just w. V10, better looks
Mack is a rookie on exotic cars
Greenhill has Carrera GT ($500k,not 911)
Numerous youngs MDs have Lambo Murcielagos, McClaren SLRs, Ferrari 599s, Ford GTs, and Enzos that blow this away...
Posted by guest , Apr 24, 2009 6:08PM
correction R8, R10 above....hitting the sauce already
Posted by guest , Apr 24, 2009 7:03PM
@30- could they perhaps be talking about audis because THAT'S THE CAR MENTIONED IN THE POST, and not because it was the first one that comes to their mind when the topic of cars comes up?
douche.
Posted by guest , Apr 24, 2009 7:03PM
Rebecca Jarvis is beside herself, she stood outside the NY fed all day and all she got was a John Mack
Posted by guest , Apr 24, 2009 7:06PM
Kudlow is calling the stress test a political trojan horse.
Posted by guest , Apr 24, 2009 7:23PM
Oh my Phil Lebow is angry. Hmmm larry kudlow asked about more money being given and phil didn't want to talk about it and finally admitted it would be a huge amount. I guess Larry was not supposed to ask that question, wasn't in the script.
Posted by guest , Apr 24, 2009 8:32PM
@30
It sounds like you don't know you cars either since the A8 is NOTHING like a Lambo. I'm sure you meant to compare the R8 (as seen in the picture above) to the Lambo.
Posted by guest , Apr 24, 2009 8:41PM
Realistically speaking, between the mediocre results and humble-as-pie dialog around TARP paybacks and risk taking, and considering the fact that he was the first to run to the gym wall to find out if he passed, it does seem at this point that John Mack is the only one who is taking any of this seriously.
God bless him
Posted by trojan , Apr 24, 2009 10:46PM
R8 has best value for price tag of high performance cars. old man mack knows what he's doing. for once.
Posted by guest , Apr 25, 2009 9:54AM
As the owner of a used A4, I resent this tag.
Posted by guest , Apr 25, 2009 3:19PM
I think you meant "banded together", not "banned together", unless you were being clever and suggesting they're banning themselves from the meeting with the feds...together.
Yeah that's it!
Posted by guest , Apr 25, 2009 3:44PM
@40-you're stunningly lame.
Posted by Finnegan , Apr 25, 2009 6:33PM
It means the rest had the results faxed or emailed or hand delivered and Mack wanted clarification on some conclusions.
Posted by guest , Apr 25, 2009 9:21PM
I hear that the package was extermely thin and light. When Mack opened it, he found a single page with two words in large caps: you're fucked.
Posted by guest , Apr 25, 2009 9:38PM
@42- and he knew before seeing them he was going to need clarification? yeah.
Posted by guest , Apr 26, 2009 6:54PM
http://community.nytimes.com/article/comments/2009/04/26/business/26pay.html?s=1&pg=2
The masses are grabbing their pitchforks and torches. Pretty amusing. Someone should tell them that unless the banks have a plan to continue the one-time gains and fanstatical asset write-ups for another three quarters, there's no way Q1 will be typical of 2009.
Posted by guest , Apr 26, 2009 7:16PM
Sorry, fantastical.
Posted by guest , Apr 26, 2009 8:43PM
@30 - Take it you work at Greenhill with all the other BB outcasts?
Posted by Finnegan , Apr 26, 2009 8:56PM
@44... yea was not quite coherent there... should have said they ALL had it sent, and Mack had concerns and wanted more discussion face to face.