Finished giving the investing community a crash course in things to not do if you desire to avoid having your name mentioned in the press in conjunction with “massive fraud” that is! For those of you just joining us, please review the notes from yesterday’s lesson, which include but are in no way limited to: don’t steal $3 million from your former employer, don’t allow “tough-looking men” to drop by the office during business hours “all the time,” don’t throw stacks of $10,000 at a bunch of girls from the office on the way back from a trip to Vegas (or at least don’t take pics), and don’t tell your partner “I want you to know we are in a Ponzi scheme.” Moving on!
Today we look at leaving major funds in your $4 billion private equity firm unaudited. It’s just not a good idea. Makes haters say stuff like, “this is a red flag.”
Now, in the event that you’ve already made this mistake, don’t panic. Just devise a statement. I’m sure what you want to say, and I don’t at all blame you, is basically, “Who the fuck are you to put me on trial? I’ve never even met you.” Rather, though, consider something like this:
A spokesman for PEMGroup said the lack of an auditor at some funds isn’t a problem. “Investors can look at any and all records they so choose,” said the spokesman, Mike Sitrick. He said one investor, which he didn’t name, recently brought in its own auditor to comb through the books of a PEMGroup fund and “came away completely satisfied.” He added that investors are aware some funds are unaudited before they put in money and that some funds do provide for external auditors.
never trust a gay asian
Loved how the WSJ article oh-so-lightly implies the guy had his wife killed, then quickly moves on to the “real dirt”.
PemGroup, SemGroup………names in the news today!
@2- actually, they addressed it an entirely separate article, since it’s kind of a large detail. pay better attention next time.
http://online.wsj.com/article/SB123976601469019957.html
“Mr. Pang, PEMGroup’s CEO, is in China, where he traveled recently for an annual religious pilgrimage, said Mr. Sitrick.”
No doubt to find a panda bear’s asshole to climb into and hide.
“Religious pilgrimage” my ass.
Who the f*ck invests in an un-audited fund? (Besides FFG, etc, that is)
Didn’t “Pang” go to the moon with the Apollo astronauts? Some kind of fruit drink? I asked our quants and even they didn’t know.
Peng Gay Fat Choi!
@ 4 guess I should. thanks for the link.
Don’t worry guys. Batman will bring him back.
“I make it rain on dem’ hoes…”
- Danny Peng
@12- no one gives a shit.
@13- what made you think bess gave a rat’s ass what you told her to do?
@5 – Dead on.
Westernized Chinese (read:Taiwan) don’t make religious pilgrimages.
“Good luck, Mr. Gorsky.”
-Neil Armstrong
This story is so Rupert Murdoch. This is a small potatoes firm, not at all mainstream. I read the WSJ article carefully last night to see their investment strategy and who their clients are. The former is murky and the later are simply identified as a lot of individuals from overseas. If he was a Blackstone partner it would be interesting, but this is just a small time scammer from overseas with a seedy background.
“This story is so Rupert Murdoch”
could that be because RM owns the WSJ?
“This is a small potatoes firm”
that alleges to manages $4 billion
@17, doosh, that’s why it’s interesting
18 17 here. Yes, I know that RM owns the WSJ. Re the AUM (thats assets under management), the operative word is alleges. Has anyone reputable even heard of this place? No. Thus my point: this is a domestic violence story, has nothing to do with investment management. Leading to my conclusion that if RM didn’t own the WSJ, it wouldn’t be a topic of interest.
@17:
Few Chinese-Americans operate a hedge fund despite their status. That certain people who operate media consumed much to expose an inconsequential possible fraud detects that people’s cause of using this operator: this people attempts to deflect universal rage over their certain frauds from them to Chinese-Americans.
@17/20
You’re right, it has NOTHING to do with investment management. I don’t know what you’re smoking, but I want some.
They are running out of double digit billion finance industry frauds, down to the single digit migits.
@5, it’s Qing Ming religious festival, fairly important, google it.
The more you learn…
#15
“Westernized Chinese (read:Taiwan) don’t make religious pilgrimages.”
So you’re saying the commies are more like to make religious pilgrimages?
No one is going to call out the homo @19 for misspelling douche?! That’s about as JV as it gets! What happened to this place?
@11
I think he said “i may it wain on dem hoe”.
@ 26, @19 here. It’s a funny word, and I selected a funny way to spell it. Lighten up fuckwad
Tear down your citi wall!
@28. “douche” is a “funny word”?
@10, line of the day. Except Bruce Wayne was most likely involved in CDO Squared.
http://batman.wikia.com/wiki/Lau
Bess rules!
@28 because you don’t know how to spell it. Dumbass is a funny word too (you must answer to it by this point in your life) but no matter how funny it is I’m not going to spell it “dommass”…dumbass.
Does this mean no happy ending for investors? Or is that inwestors? Not even a hot towel?
- Fixed Income
@34– that joke was funny in the early 90′s. Get over that shit, you dumbfuck. No wonder you’re in fixed income.
@35 – thanks for the history lesson, cum gargler. Were you a second grader working as a hot towel boy in the early 90s with your mom while she took care of customers or were you a patron who is now in his mid 40s and still working as an associate at Jeffries on pitchbooks at 1:21am and still waiting to get asked to carry the pitchbooks to your first meeting? Sucks to be you.
- Fixed Income
kpWBqF Really enjoyed this blog.Thanks Again. Great.
ToEXs7 Fantastic blog article. Cool.
Qf0KpM Hey, thanks for the post.Much thanks again. Cool.
Thanks again for the article.Really looking forward to read more. Much obliged.
I appreciate you sharing this article.Much thanks again. Fantastic.
Thanks for sharing, this is a fantastic article post.Really looking forward to read more. Keep writing.
Thanks again for the blog article.Really thank you! Fantastic.
Hey, thanks for the post.Thanks Again.
Great, thanks for sharing this article.Really looking forward to read more. Great.
Thank you for your article.Really thank you! Fantastic.
Thank you ever so for you blog.
Really enjoyed this blog article.Really thank you! Cool.
Thanks for the post.Much thanks again. Really Cool.
Thank you for your article.Really thank you! Cool.
Very informative article.Much thanks again. Fantastic.
Muchos Gracias for your post.Thanks Again. Will read on…
Looking forward to reading more. Great article. Awesome.
Enjoyed every bit of your post.Much thanks again. Fantastic.
Thanks a lot for the blog article.Really thank you! Really Great.
Really informative blog post.Really thank you! Much obliged.
Really appreciate you sharing this blog article.Really thank you! Much obliged.
Say, you got a nice post.Really thank you! Want more.
Great, thanks for sharing this article post.Much thanks again. Awesome.
Thank you for your post.Thanks Again. Awesome.