Don't Even Try To Blame Harvard For This Mess

Posted by Muffie Benson-Perella, Apr 03, 2009, 2:25pm

Muffie Benson-PerellaMuffie Benson-Perella (muffie AT muffmarkets.com) was an Associate in the Investment Banking Division of a "Bulge Bracket" bank. She holds a B.A. in French and Art from Vassar College and an M.B.A. from Harvard Business School. She concentrated in Contemporary French Poetry at prep school where she was awarded the exclusive premiership of the school's "French Club." Today, Ms. Benson-Perella is the Founder and Managing Director of "Muffie on Markets" (http://www.muffmarkets.com), a deep dive into capital markets, finance and investment strategy. She is also the Founder and Managing Director of Muff Cap, LLC., an invitation only, private investment vehicle for non-existent, prestigious and accredited investors only, employing an actively managed, long-short strategy.

Apparently it has become fashionable to bash higher education. And it seems to be even more fashionable to bash higher higher education and the graduate programs that compose it. It doesn't take an in-depth understanding of non-linear systems in mathematics to draw a straight line right to the premise that bashing the highest institutions of higher higher education [(higher)3 if you will] has become the most fashionable. This little bit of social algebra is borne out by the number of no-nothing articles, petty blogs and opinionated op-ed pieces that have, of late, attacked no lesser a monument than the noble and proud edifice of the Harvard Business School.

A recent Bloomberg piece (written by a Columbia graduate, obviously) went so far as to suggest that a November task-force was formed at HBS as a reaction to scrutinize the ability of HBS to teach risk management and develop a case to facilitate that goal. Of course, this betrays a very poor understanding of the role of cases at HBS. Harvard cases are written to market to other institutions. Attempting to teach actual Harvard cases to Harvard students would result in a massive and near violent revolt of apathy and boredom. The width and breadth of world experience already under the skirt of the matriculating Harvard student makes any attempt to teach the trite and condescending prose that typifies the average Harvard case the height of effrontery. To the extent cases are discussed at all in HBS classes it is to critique them for their eventual redistribution to the Crimson-challenged. Clearly, the task-force discussed in the article is to distribute better risk management teaching expertise to the world and prevent the sort of melt-down that non-Harvard types seem to enjoy causing every 20 years or so. Despite all our efforts to place alumni at the top, and in key positions around the country, incompetent minions, listless staff and executives who cannot learn to take orders manage to scuttle our progress time after time.

Of course, it comes as absolutely no surprise whatsoever that the same dreadful article seems to think it entirely devoid of irony to point out what the likes of Scamford University is up to "out West."

The new series of seminars at the school, near Palo Alto, California, help "students discover and defend their values," Dean Robert Joss said in an article for Stanford Business magazine's forthcoming May/June issue. Classes include "Understanding Cheating," which looks at why people make unethical decisions.

Yale School of Management, in New Haven, Connecticut, initiated a similar program in 2006, according to the school's Web site.

Muffie Benson-Perella is, of course, totally unsurprised.

Normally these things don't rise to a level worthy of my attention, and I have been frightfully busy lately, but I couldn't help but finally comment on the kind of slander that apparently passes for journalism of late.

And speaking of being busy, I must admit that I feel a little guilty that I have been so absent and neglectful of my many fans. To make it up to you, I know my many fans will be thrilled to learn that it is now quite easy to show your love and support for me at home or in the office with this new Muffie Benson-Perella Luxury Tea & Coffee Mug (hereinafter "LTCM"). Emblazoned prominently with your humble author's morning office-recovery ritual, it is an ideal gift to yourself, a reward for permitting yourself the finer things in life, particularly in times of trouble and when resentment has grown to absurd levels. Perfect for engineering your own Monday morning office-recovery after a bit of well-deserved Sunday night self-indulgence with the BFFs!
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Though I know none of my fans would even dream of microwaving your tea or coffee, but it happens to be microwave safe anyhow, just in-case jealous co-workers or family members should "borrow" your perfect beverage container for extended periods without first asking.

Reward yourself today, because the Muffie Benson-Perella LTCM won't be around forever!

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Posted in: Heard in the Suite
Tags: Harvard, Muffie Benson-Perella

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