markets7.pngIs the SEC drowning in a wading pool of ignorance? Have no fear. The Commission is getting “…more smarter, more swifter, more successfuler….” at least if you believe Robert Khuzami, sometime federal prosecutor made SEC enforcement chief. It seems that the new focus over at the SEC will be to hire smart guys. Really smart guys. How smart? Have you ever heard of Plato, Aristotle, Socrates? Morons.
Khuzami took over Enforcement from Linda Thomsen, passer of the Ponzi buck, back in February, leaving precious few targets for ridicule at the Commission. Be this as it may, Khuzami is working hard to fill Thomsen’s shoes.
When asked if it was true that specialists and attorneys with high fees are easily bored, Khuzami revealed that “lawyers in a specialized group could be permitted to work on unrelated cases to maintain variety,” and that “It’s not about what’s broken.”
The good news is that Khuzami is due to testify before Congress next week. The sharpening of disemboweling cutlasses could be heard echoing throughout the Dirksen federal building over the last 48 hours.
SEC Plans Fraud Fight With Teams of Specialists [The Wall Street Journal]

Comments (19)

  1. Posted by guest | April 29, 2009 at 10:59 AM

    Twitter will fix it.

  2. Posted by guest | April 29, 2009 at 11:02 AM

    Too Don’t, Didn’t Care

  3. Posted by Lowly Assistant | April 29, 2009 at 11:15 AM

    As I was saying, Robert, you can be instrumental in changing the public verdict. Do you understand, Robert? Have I made myself clear?
    As an unmuddied lake, Mary. As clear as an azure sky of deepest summer. You can rely on me, Mary.

  4. Posted by Anal_yst | April 29, 2009 at 11:17 AM

    Step 1: Actually read stuff people send us.
    Step 2: Hire people who understand aforementioned stuff.
    Step 3: Do something about it.
    Rinse, wash, repeat.
    Rocket science, I know.

  5. Posted by guest | April 29, 2009 at 11:20 AM

    Can you get swine flu from unprotected violent twittering?

  6. Posted by guest | April 29, 2009 at 11:21 AM

    Princess Bride in da hizzle. Nice work EP.

  7. Posted by guest | April 29, 2009 at 11:22 AM

    Really smart guys. How smart? Have you ever heard of Plato, Aristotle, Socrates? Morons.
    EPs you just made my day.
    ~SEG

  8. Posted by guest | April 29, 2009 at 11:33 AM

    @4 is correct. Thank God the Fire Department always shows up if you call them.

  9. Posted by guest | April 29, 2009 at 11:34 AM

    Always nice to see a Princess Bride reference.
    Never get in a battle of wits with a Sithilian, when DEATH ith on the line!

  10. Posted by guest | April 29, 2009 at 11:34 AM

    Khuzami has a smart plan. Use the word smart in all sentences and be smart about it. That way they will all be smart. I’m a smart alec.

  11. Posted by guest | April 29, 2009 at 11:37 AM

    Never get into a land war with Texas.

  12. Posted by guest | April 29, 2009 at 11:51 AM

    Gotta love the ‘more smart, more swift, more successful’ line in the WSJ article. Shouldn’t it be ‘smarter, swifter, and more successful’ Moron.

  13. Posted by guest | April 29, 2009 at 12:01 PM

    Hi, my name is BHO, would BL or EP be available for the job?
    Unfortunatly you need to be confirmed and therefore having used turbo tax may substantially increase the chances of getting the job. My email is: potus@whitehouse.gov

  14. Posted by guest | April 29, 2009 at 12:31 PM

    “…more smarter, more swifter, more successfuler….”
    You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.

  15. Posted by guest | April 29, 2009 at 12:49 PM

    @12,
    Good point. Also worth noting that Dirksen SOB is one of three buildings housing Senators’ offices and committee hearing rooms.
    The other two are Hart SOB and Russell SOB. Dirksen is the least impressive of the three (though it does have the cafeterias in the basement and a tennis court on the roof), with Russell the oldest and therefore most ornate & prestigious residence of the three (also where all reporters broadcast from) and Hart the biggest and more modern one: it alone houses almost half of the 50 senators in addition to some committees.
    No doubt the SEC isn’t popular in any one of the aforementioned edifices.

  16. Posted by guest | April 29, 2009 at 1:30 PM

    Inconceivable!!!!

  17. Posted by guest | April 29, 2009 at 1:31 PM

    True blave…

  18. Posted by guest | April 29, 2009 at 1:34 PM

    Sonny, true love is the greatest thing in the world. Except for a nice MLT, a mutton, lettuce and tomato sandwich, where the mutton is nice and lean and the tomato is ripe. They’re so perky, I love that. But that’s not what he said. He distinctly said “to blave.” And, as we all know, “to blave” means “to bluff.” So you’re probably playing cards, and he cheated –

  19. Posted by guest | April 29, 2009 at 2:09 PM

    anybody want a peanut?

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