Posted by guest , Apr 01, 2009 2:34PM

Big cuts in CRM- auto team slashed completely. Same in SLF.

Posted by guest , Apr 01, 2009 2:35PM

OK, I'll bite - SLF? salesforce?

Posted by guest , Apr 01, 2009 2:35PM

How are they still cutting SLF? Sounds like everytime there's a post about JPM layoffs it's in SLF.

Posted by guest , Apr 01, 2009 2:37PM

syndicated leveraged finance

Posted by guest , Apr 01, 2009 2:38PM

syndicated leveraged finance

Posted by guest , Apr 01, 2009 2:38PM

SLF = simulated league football.

Posted by guest , Apr 01, 2009 2:40PM

slf was where all the cutting started, back in october 2007. it is amazing there are still people left to cut.

Posted by guest , Apr 01, 2009 2:40PM

Syndicated and Leveraged Finance. Come on guys, attention to detail.

Posted by guest , Apr 01, 2009 2:45PM

slf = shortsighted liberal freeloaders

Posted by guest , Apr 01, 2009 2:48PM

Cuts in KLF going down now. They were the justified ancients of mu mu.

They will be missed.

Posted by guest , Apr 01, 2009 2:48PM

Rumors of incoming analysts being shifted to CRM and TSS for 6-12 months. Some internationals might be cut altogether while we can still blame it on TARP.

Posted by guest , Apr 01, 2009 2:49PM

stop with the blasted acronyms. CRM? TSS?

Posted by guest , Apr 01, 2009 2:50PM

Rumors of incoming analysts being shifted to CRM and TSS for 6-12 months. Some internationals might be cut altogether while we can still blame it on TARP. If you're an incoming analyst, don't bother calling our "business partners" in HR, call your desk and you might get a more realistic answer.

Posted by guest , Apr 01, 2009 2:50PM

@12 no big deal there. They did the same thing with the incoming class of analysts at Bear. The moved some of them to finance and ops.

Posted by guest , Apr 01, 2009 2:52PM

@13 CRM = Credit Risk Management (something BSC and LEH had no need for)

TSS = Treasury & Securities Services - the custody and cash management line of business.

Posted by guest , Apr 01, 2009 2:54PM

@15: Theres at least one person from the Bear contingent that made it back into the FO within a few months (industry group).

Posted by guest , Apr 01, 2009 2:57PM

who is Jamie Dimon? Can you post a picture please?

Posted by guest , Apr 01, 2009 3:03PM

Yesterday was a literal blood letting in IT and back office. Check this out -> if you were let go now and were ex Bear, you were given squat as far as severance. If they let you go prior to March 17th they were obligated to give you what every other ex-Bear person got (double time from March '08 until your term date plus 3 months plus 3 weeks a year). Talk about a dick move. Wait for that agreement to expire and then whammo!

Posted by guest , Apr 01, 2009 3:14PM

@11. Well played sir.

Posted by guest , Apr 01, 2009 3:16PM

FYI, seems like TMI WRT terminations at JPM's SLF is NFG. Not sure JD would TTK to ATB that PAJ these days. JMO.

Can't sit now--- I LLMAO.

Posted by guest , Apr 01, 2009 3:41PM

Maybe Dimon can buy some planes and fix up a hanger really quickly to help the situation. He could import some wood for it.

he could import some wood up his fucking ass too.

Posted by guest , Apr 01, 2009 4:24PM

For those of you around long enough, SLF was the old GSF.....

Posted by guest , Apr 01, 2009 4:27PM

19 - That's ruthless, but with this being Dimon, not unbelievable on its face.

I always knew Jamie was pissed about having to raise to $10/share.

Posted by guest , Apr 01, 2009 4:45PM

19, the best deal was getting laid off Dec. 07 from Bear.

Bonus ALL CASH; beating SMD paper crap; full severance, full unemployment payments, full cobra

And banging 20 something models for 18 mos

Posted by guest , Apr 01, 2009 4:55PM

@25 I disagree. The best was getting fired from JP in May of 08. Severance + Full bonus and you still had time to find a job before the market crashed.

Posted by guest , Apr 01, 2009 5:02PM

"And banging 20 something models for 18 mos"

okay, buddy.

Posted by guest , Apr 01, 2009 5:02PM

@21 and 13

I'm going to B my L over Wideclops' Ts and then engage her in ATM....just keeping in line with the acronyms.

Posted by guest , Apr 01, 2009 5:04PM

@26, not necessarily. It took me 6 months from then to land a temp job. The market was just really competitive, 6-round interviews were the norm.

Posted by guest , Apr 01, 2009 5:06PM

off the subject, but check out the below article about congressmen giving out bonuses to staffers. hypocrisy.

http://online.wsj.com/article/SB123854799133476409.html#articleTabs%3Dcomments

Posted by guest , Apr 01, 2009 5:12PM

@30- sorry, no. the average LC (legislative correspondent, equivalent of analyst) makes probably a base of 30k (seriously) and their bonus is, if you read the article ranges "from a few hundred dollars to $14,000" the latter obviously going to those higher up. So you've got the highest staff member maxing out at 14k, compared to an MD getting millions. "hypocrisy"? check yourself.

Posted by guest , Apr 01, 2009 5:38PM

speaking of check out, i'm a bag boy at a grocery store. I didn't get anything above my pittance of a wage. Why should they?

Posted by guest , Apr 01, 2009 8:51PM

@31: hypocrisy is a matter of principle, not pure $$. A bonus is a bonus. In a recession, all "surplus" funds, no matter how small, should be sent back to the treasury. Even more, I can't see how anyone could argue that congress has been performing up to par, much less above par, definitely not well enough to deserve any kind of bonus. I hope that CNBC and CNN pick up this great piece of investigative journalism. Personally, I believe in bonuses. However, people in glass houses shouldn't throw rocks. These idiotic congressmen have been throwing lots of rocks with their holier than thou attitude. Well, it looks like the emperor wears no clothes....

Posted by guest , Apr 01, 2009 9:02PM

firmwide layoffs at jpm on the 30, 31st. Ops hit especially hard (cue who cares comments). the firm policy changes after april 1, and if you get laid off from this point on you do not automatically get 60 days pay & severance starts immediately. those are the facts.

i would imagine more to come, otherwise why change the layoff policy?

Posted by guest , Apr 01, 2009 9:15PM

what about fixed income? sales & trading? derivs?

Posted by guest , Apr 01, 2009 9:32PM

I know of a Bear Director who had no work in Bear itself still sticking with JPM.

I wondered why they kept him for so long.

The answer could be the March 31st deadline where severance rules change.

OK, now let the lynching start

Posted by guest , Apr 01, 2009 10:04PM

I'm surprised anyone got laid off in March given the change come April. We all know how nickel n' dimon loves to cut costs.

Posted by guest , Apr 01, 2009 10:24PM

I'm in CRM at JPM and did not hear about any layoffs in our group today.

Posted by guest , Apr 01, 2009 11:16PM

@19 - the Bear severance plan still applies until June 1st which was the official date of the merger closing. There was a note to that effect on the intranet a couple of weeks ago when JPMC updated their own severance plan to "make it in line with industry standards" by making it less generous.

Posted by guest , Apr 02, 2009 10:59AM

I was in the IB and got laid off - 90 days salary & benefits + 2 weeks severance. Got to keep my restricted stock, too.

@ 39 - you saying that they should have given me double time?

Posted by guest , Apr 02, 2009 11:18AM

The rumor about layoffs in CRM-Autos at JPM is definitely false.

Posted by guest , Apr 02, 2009 11:20AM

@40, how long were you at JPM? Based on your package, it seems not much longer than a year or two...

Posted by guest , Apr 02, 2009 1:48PM

@ 42 - that sounds about right.