12:08 pm:
Obama in ‘da house.
12:13 pm:
I can announce that I saved Chrysler, nothing is fucked, I am safeguarding taxpayer dollars, Fiat is going to save the day (oh and Canada too).
12:13 pm:
Bob Nardelli is a cool guy. No. Seriously. (But he’s fired).
The UAW cut down to the bone, and then found more muscle to cut. It was amazing.
You, America, will also be sacrificing.

12:15 pm:

Some stakeholders did NOT cooperate.
Damn hedgefunds held out waiting for a unjustified taxpayer bailout.
Some demanded twice the return of other stakeholders.
I don’t stand with them I stand with Chrysler’s (everything).
12:16 pm:

Bankruptcy is not a sign of weakness.
This process will be quick.
12:18 pm:

Oh, I almost forgot.
Hedge Funds suck.
It is unacceptable for a small group of speculators to endanger my success.
As such an effective and diligent steward of your taxpayer dollars I was not prepared to provide unlimited bailout funds or to reward greed.
This is going to be our finest hour 30 60 days. Seriously. ‘kaythanksbye.

Comments (87)

  1. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 12:14 PM

    I think we have a partnership

  2. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 12:15 PM

    Who makes “The Beast” and does the WH have a guarantee on it?

  3. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 12:16 PM

    Those evil hedge funds fucking everybody again.

  4. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 12:16 PM

    “bankruptcy is not a sign of weakness”

  5. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 12:17 PM

    hedge funds are screwing the taxpayer

  6. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 12:17 PM

    My name’s Barry and I guarantee that in the future only evil hedge funds and their evil investors (pension funds, teachers unions, insurance companies, charities, universities… you know that crew) are fucked.

  7. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 12:17 PM

    Ha – you Wall Street liberals are getting a great return on your contributions to the Obama campaign.
    He does not stand with you. You must sacrifice.
    “Hedge funds” have become the new evil straw man. You’re all screwed.

  8. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 12:17 PM

    hedge funds are screwing the taxpayer

  9. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 12:18 PM

    so by fucking the debt holders has barry finally paid his union dues for getting him elected?

  10. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 12:19 PM

    Yeah a “small group of speculators” are to blame for Chrysler’s blow-up.
    What a fucking joker this guy is.

  11. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 12:19 PM

    obama the car salesman- if you decide to buy a car, i hope it will be a chrysler. don’t forget about our amazing warranty!

  12. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 12:20 PM

    we as a nation must stand shoulder to shoulder against the imperialist financial pirates who somehow feel that their senior debt somehow entitles them to something

  13. Posted by Investorcluzo | April 30, 2009 at 12:20 PM

    chrysler warranties backed by you the tax payer, er, I mean, the u.s. government. market rally in 5, 4, 3…

  14. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 12:20 PM

    New hedge fund regs on the way ASAP!

  15. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 12:21 PM

    what a load of cock

  16. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 12:22 PM

    TOTUS
    Teleprompter of the United States

  17. Posted by SgtJack | April 30, 2009 at 12:23 PM

    this process will be as quick as an old man taking a leak, but more frustration

  18. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 12:25 PM

    $4billion Taxpayer money forked over 4 months ago goes up in smoke in 5…4…3…

  19. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 12:25 PM

    barry has not had a good week. at all

  20. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 12:27 PM

    I’d run from Chrysler like a pig with a bad cough

  21. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 12:27 PM

    Shake hands with the government or it will destroy you.

  22. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 12:28 PM

    so does this now mean that chrysler is now protected against claims by the uaw?

  23. Posted by american bandersnatch | April 30, 2009 at 12:29 PM

    I remember when the vet had to put my dog to sleep. I was sad and thought it was unfair. I’m sure O feels the same way about Chrysler.

  24. Posted by merkin capital partners | April 30, 2009 at 12:31 PM

    I think it’s about time for a speech from Dealey Plaza.

  25. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 12:33 PM

    Did I hear that right? Did Barry just say “If you are considering buying a car, I want you to buy an American car”? What, now that the White House just took a massive dump in contract law and bankruptcy law, is it about to f*ck the WTO in the ass as well?

  26. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 12:33 PM

    It’s all about simple math:
    Chrysler hedge fund investors: ~200 voters
    UAW voters: ~500,000 voters
    If you thought this was ever about anything other than politics, you’re a fucking idiot.
    Barry O can go to hell (and probably will).

  27. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 12:34 PM

    RE:
    12:18 pm:
    Oh, I almost forgot.
    Hedge Funds suck.
    and with that should be lumped the US Constitution and Spreme Court who gave and would back up the rights that the HFs hold in this.
    D@mn and the mighty O thought he had all bases covered with the turn of the Specter screw. Now…. how does POTUS eliminate SCOTUS?!

  28. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 12:35 PM

    You see, this is why we’re leaving
    /Texas

  29. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 12:37 PM

    Someone should have told these hedgefund masters of the universe that it is usually not a good idea to get into a game of chicken with the President of the United States.
    You may have experience trading/investing large amounts of money but this is beyond your paygrade.
    See you at the confirmation hearing, fuckheads.
    -Big O

  30. Posted by SgtJack | April 30, 2009 at 12:37 PM

    @25 wow.
    dog and pony shows on the reg…

  31. Posted by chernevik | April 30, 2009 at 12:39 PM

    I decide who has and hasn’t sacrificed enough.
    People dependent on me for capital and regulatory forebearance get that.
    Independent people of me don’t, so we’re gonna have to make them dependent on me.
    I mean, regulate them to avoid systemic risk and tax them out of fairness.
    Also, you’re all going to have to buy electric cars once the EPA gets done regulating carbon. Rumors that only Chrysler cars will meet the regulatory standard are just crazy talk. They’ll cost $50,000, but I’ve decided it’s a sacrifice you need to make.

  32. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 12:41 PM

    Is it possible for Obama to speak for more than 1 minute without blaming or villifying someone?

  33. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 12:41 PM

    Damnable liens and bankruptcy rights. What in the world are the hedgies thinking, that they could rely on their federally recognized statutory rights to get paid before the union? Inexcuseable. Immediate execution is the only alternative.

  34. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 12:42 PM

    Wh id ever going to invest ina corporation again after this?

  35. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 12:45 PM

    I feel like I should be singing here:
    “When you walk through a storm keep your head up high,
    And don’t be afraid of the dark.
    At the end of a storm is a golden sky
    And the sweet silver song of a lark.
    Walk on through the wind,
    Walk on through the rain,
    Tho’ your dreams be tossed and blown.
    Walk on, walk on with hope in your heart,
    And you’ll never walk alone,
    You’ll never walk alone!”
    Bwwwwaaaaawaaaawwaaaawaaa…. it’s too painful…. booohoooohooooohooo….

  36. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 12:46 PM

    @30,
    Because 143 days in the Senate makes him infinitely more experienced and qualified than anyone else, right? Back to Yahoo Finance. Jackass.
    BTW, his paygrade is about $400k. Not exactly setting the bar high.

  37. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 12:47 PM

    we’re going to show those “money people” who’s boss.

  38. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 12:50 PM

    EP, stupid spin.
    Bwwwwaaaaawaaaawwaaaawaaa…. it’s too painful…. booohoooohooooohooo….

  39. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 12:52 PM

    Even the Mother’s and Father’s Italian Association has scruples.

  40. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 12:53 PM

    Barry is ugly and has big ears.
    So there.

  41. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 12:53 PM

    @37
    Haha! You just proved my point. You can only think of power in terms of monetary compensation.
    This guy took down the Clinton machine in the Democratic party. What have you done lately?
    -30

  42. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 12:54 PM

    Guess the hedgies didn’t get the memo that we’ve converted to a socialist system. Get Rahm on that asap.

  43. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 12:55 PM

    @37
    Haha! You just proved my point. You can only think of power in terms of monetary compensation.
    This guy took down the Clinton machine in the Democratic party. What have you done lately?
    Remember that power doesn’t corrupt, it reveals.
    -30

  44. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 12:57 PM

    we should buzz downtown Manhattan again to shake em up a bit

  45. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 12:57 PM

    The UAW is like Social Security. They take your dues now, promise to pay you benefits later, and waalaa, you’re screwed.
    - Ruth Madoff

  46. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 12:58 PM

    @ 42 and 44
    wait until the bond and equity markets throw up on Barry’s plans
    then you’ll see who the BMOC is

  47. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 1:07 PM

    Hey Barry, your dog is ugly.
    Chris Berman

  48. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 1:08 PM

    @47
    Just like they took down FDR for the NRA, WPA, the SEC, etc…?
    Just like they took down Reagan for the long-term structural deficits he created?
    Where are the bond and equity investors going to go? Russia, China…..
    Wishful thinking on your part.
    -44

  49. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 1:11 PM

    “Nardelli [the CEO] says the new company will be run by a nine-person board, with six picked by the government and three by Fiat. The board will pick a new CEO.
    This is the point of all this.
    Obama also selected a new CEO for BofA yesterday.
    Community activists will be running our major corporations.
    Posted by: Enchanted at April 30, 2009 12:09 PM (+sBB4)”
    http://minx.cc/?post=286671

  50. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 1:16 PM

    @ 47
    gold, silver, copper…no need to invest in countries and their worthless fiat currencies

  51. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 1:18 PM

    @17 FTW

  52. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 1:25 PM

    Market opens up a fair amount…Obama speaks…market drops…
    Woa…Deja Vu

  53. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 1:27 PM

    @51
    Again you miss the point. Not only did he take down the Clinton machine, he turned it into his own.
    Chrysler sends a message to all the bondholders of GM and the insolvent banks.
    O is an idiot? Really? A 47 year-old black community activist gets himself elected President of the United States.

  54. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 1:28 PM
  55. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 1:29 PM

    I know we all find it funny, but the developments over the past year from Bush and Obama are very disturbing.
    The frog is boiling.

  56. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 1:32 PM

    #57, I knew O’Reilly should not have made those statements about “freedom fries”.

  57. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 1:33 PM

    @57 Go long RGR, SWHC and GLD.
    ~the Muleskinner~

  58. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 1:34 PM

    It’s twuuu, It’s twuuuuuuu!
    - Michelle Obama

  59. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 1:35 PM

    @55
    Go back to Macy’s passing out samples of Drakkar cologne. BTW, I heard the latest issue of Grape Soda Magazine is out. Get some!

  60. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 1:35 PM

    Go long KFC

  61. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 1:40 PM

    The Detroit unions didn’t get Barack elected – directly, at least. In case you forgot, Michigan didn’t have its primary votes counted (would have gone Hillary) and the general election wasn’t close enough for Michigan to matter.
    Granted it’s nice that he’s finally living up to Marx and hooking the proletariat up with the means of production.

  62. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 1:40 PM

    When the President talks, Americans gets hurt.
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bpUPW4FL6Mo

  63. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 1:41 PM

    There’s a lot of crying on this board but I’m not sure why.
    Anyone who couldn’t see the risk of something like this coming down the pipeline over the last 6+ months should have their MBA gold star removed from their mom’s refrigerator.
    There’s no way institutional money was going to take a haircut that big without collecting on their CDS first. I’m sure that there will also be some savvy PM’s that make a lot of money on this.

  64. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 1:41 PM

    I hate you Barry.
    I hate you.
    I hate you.
    I hate you.
    Sincerely,
    Charles “The Prince” Gasparino

  65. Posted by Anal_yst | April 30, 2009 at 1:42 PM

    Net-net, I’m curious how many people (and to what magnitude) are getting f*cked here. Screw the equity/bondholders (end-owner being pensions, endowments, etc) for the good of the UAW?

  66. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 1:45 PM

    #60 – it’s only half twuuu

  67. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 1:46 PM

    #60 – it’s only half twuuu

  68. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 1:48 PM

    Obama = LOBSTERWAGON with three wheels and an ugly wife

  69. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 1:55 PM

    MEMO
    From: The President of the United States of America.
    To: Hedge funds/Sucker bondholders
    My fellow Americans,
    I think in all fairness I should explain to you exactly what it is that I do. For instance, tomorrow morning I’ll get up nice and early take a walk down over to the bank and walk in and see you and um, if you don’t have my money for me, I’ll crack your fuckin’ head wide open in front of everybody at the bank. And just about the time that I’m coming out of jail, hopefully you’ll be coming out of your coma and guess what? I’ll split your fuckin’ head open again ‘cuz i’m fuckin’ stupid, I don’t give a fuck about jail. That’s my business. That’s what I do.
    You put my money to sleep, [and] I’ll put your fuckin’ brain to sleep!
    Respectfully yours,
    BHO

  70. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 2:02 PM

    Torture works. Just ask Michelle Obama’s vagina.

  71. Posted by miami | April 30, 2009 at 2:06 PM

    It’s amazing how the only thing that can save the Republicans continues to happen — the continued and monumental stupidity of Democratic leaders.
    It’s also amazing how quickly the Dems forgot 1994. [and 2004].
    The fact that a charismatic liar with poor grades got elected doesn’t make him smart….it means he was popular than the other guy from the Senate. Nothing more, nothing less. He got worse grades than the Libertarian candidate at Columbia, ffs.
    And yes, anyone still in these securities probably got their MBA from Stanford. Or Thunderbird.

  72. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 2:29 PM

    What’s the carbon footprint in burning a hedge fund manager alive? Better be higher than your BTU value or most of you are doomed.

  73. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 2:32 PM

    Michelle Obama has a vagina?

  74. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 2:40 PM

    @50 Obama selected a new CEO for Bank of America yesterday?
    Perhaps you’re referring to how Bank of America shareholders voted in a new Chairman of The Board?
    back to yahfin plz

  75. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 2:43 PM

    @75
    I think you’re spelling Michael’s name wrong.

  76. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 3:37 PM

    I have never been so entertained as to watch bondholders telling the Word of God to f- off. As @65 said, it was clear as day this was going to happen. What rational investor would give up all of their rights for no gains just so a bunch of whiny union workers can keep their pensions and their healthcare benefits? Besides at the end of the day, the unions are taking money from their own pocket and putting it in the other. No one ever said they were bright.

  77. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 3:43 PM

    @75 She wears underwear with dick holes in them.
    -Delaware Destroyer

  78. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 3:48 PM

    Dealbreaker….whoever wrote your interpretation of the Presidents news conference is an IDIOT. Big Panda OUT!

  79. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 3:59 PM

    sorry to burst your bubble here but you have been watching the reality tv series “America: The First 100 Days.” There was never going to be a negotiated settlement, it was unfeasible to keep the dealers and asbestos liabilities continuing.
    You have been watching a carefully editted series to make you believe that the bad guys were good and the good bad when they failed to agree to the former’s absurd terms. The producers have also succeeded in making you believe the good guys were evil and that the producer made a fantastic show.
    Please go to the imdb.com dbase now, rate the show and supply your helpful, user comments.

  80. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 4:13 PM

    what did you expect from the company who made the ‘caravan’? I drive a dodge stratus! People are afraid of me!

  81. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 4:16 PM

    what did you expect from the company who made the ‘caravan’? I drive a dodge stratus! People are afraid of me!

  82. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 4:45 PM

    FROM BLOOMBERG : The objections from the group of lenders also drew criticism from Michigan lawmakers, including Democratic Representatives John Dingell and Sander Levin.
    “The rogue hedge funds that refused to agree to a fair offer to exchange debt for cash from the U.S. Treasury, firms I label as the ‘vultures,’ will now be dealt with accordingly in court,” Dingell said.
    “It is outrageous that a handful of hedge funds and other creditors have refused to join all the other stakeholders in participating in the restructuring necessary to pave the way for a Chrysler-Fiat alliance,” said Levin.
    Let me get this straight, persons or entities are no longer able to freely choose what they believe will result in the best outcome for them with their own investments and/or the money that others have entrusted to them.
    If you agree with Dingell I would suggest that you leave the country and go directly to the nearest dictatorship and apply for citizenship.
    Let me also make a supposition that if the “rouge hedge funds” did accept $0.10 per dollar instead of the $.076 or $0.85 that the UAW and US Government were getting respectively they would be charged with abdicating their fiduciary duty, admit it or not folks, this adminstration has declared war on wealth and the wealthy.

  83. Posted by NAS Keflavik boi | April 30, 2009 at 4:54 PM

    they shoulda never stopped makin’ the slant-six… That motor could run on one quart of oil and a 3/4 empty radiator.

  84. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 6:29 PM

    I personally think this is a good plan. Who cares who thought of the idea, 30,000 jobs will be saved, a dying car company has a second chance, and now I don’t have to import parts to get my car fixed ;)
    Watch this take on the whole thing:
    http://www.newsy.com/videos/chrysler_in_for_repairs/

  85. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 9:05 PM

    LITTLE BAILOUT GTO
    (Ronnie and the Daytonas, Little GTO)
    WilliamBanzai7
    Sing along link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=44kg0IENTPU
    Little GTO, you’re really lookin mighty fine.
    Three billion deuces, a four speed haircut–its Section 363 Bankruptcy time
    Listen to her tachin’ up now, listen to her why-ee-eye-ine
    C’mon and turn it on, wind it up, blow them bondholders out GTO
    You oughta see her on a cash burn course for a quarter mile
    This little bailout Pon-Pon has got plenty of high finance style
    She beats the union gassers and them greedy hedge hoggers, really drives ‘em why-ee-eye-ild
    C’mon and turn it on, wind it up, blow them bondholders out GTO
    President Obama sings:
    Gonna save some TARP money (turnin’ it on, blowin’ it out) and buy a GTO (turnin’ it on, blowin’ it out)
    Get a bailout helmet, an Italian roll bar (turnin’ it on, blowin’ it out) and I’ll be ready to go (turnin’ it on, blowin’ it out)
    Take it out to Pomona (turnin’ it on, blowin’ it out) and let ‘em know (turnin’ it on, blowin’ it out), yeah, yeah
    That expedited Chapter 11’s the coolest thing around
    Greedy little bondholders, gonna shut you down
    When we turn it on, wind it up, blow them bonds out GTO

  86. Posted by guest | April 30, 2009 at 10:55 PM

    does anyone else here run a book with positions against Chrysler? If not, you probably have next to nothing at stake.

  87. Posted by guest | May 5, 2009 at 9:19 PM

    It is time to really expose this poser. Liberal “smart money” (a new oxymoron!) that backed Obama deserves their no lube ass fucking.
    Wake up and lets buy up the media while its cheap and expose the Halfrican-American for what he is. A fascist.
    The guy got in the US House by running in an IL democratic district and disqualifying all his primary opponents from the ballot on technacalities. Then he gets into the US Senate because the Jerry Ryan divorce swinger scandal was leaked to the media (mostly likely by Obama’s friends in the democratic controlled Cook County courts. Ryan’s husband, Obama’s opponent drops out at the last minute and unknown Obama wins.
    Look all this up for yourself.
    Was this covered in the presidential election? No. Sex scandal and a presidential candidate not covered? Come on, when does that happen.
    And no one knows where Obama was born like what hospital. All they have provided is the Hawaii short form birth certificate which doesn’t show the hospital. Also Hawaii was giving these out to anyone who was born within a year of coming to Hawaii according to reports. And there have been reasonable evidence that Obama’s mother might not (or could not) have been in Hawaii at the time of his birth (in Seattle or Africa).
    There is also the question of whether his citizenship in the US was renounced when he was in Malaysia (Indonesia?) and they didn’t allow dual citizenship. Once renouced, citenzship can not merely be reassumed.
    So he disqualifies his opponents on technicalities and gets a free ride on the most important requirement for president – a native born citizen.
    Smart? No just arrogant and well spoken. Big difference. All of us that went to top tier schools know the difference. Plenty of classmates were smart compared to the public at large which is faint praise but we also knew they didn’t below there.
    I was at Harvard roughly when Obama was. In one of their other equally prestigious grad schools there were plenty of legacies and affirmative action cases that obviously didn’t belong there.
    Obama was both a legacy and an affirmative action case. Has anyone ever looked at his SATs or LSATs the way people harped on Bush’s (which reportedly were about the same as Gore’s by the way). Did he get and deserve affirmitative action since he is half white and raised by a white family (making him arguably more white than black). Plus his black half is direct from Kenya and attended Harvard so how was his black half disadvantaged by slavery or segreation in the US?
    Did he really belong at Harvard?
    Law Review? The guy has no respect for contract or bankruptcy law. Supreme Court he wants someone that has empathy? Empathy for who? The Supreme Court doesn’t really decide cases, it decides law. And not just for one case, but for decades if not hundreds of years. You don’t have to go to law school to know this.
    Obama has an agenda far different than upholding the laws of this nation and the constitution.
    We should call for empeachment hearings as he is not upholding the laws.
    What constitutional basis does he have to do these bailouts?
    10th amendment provides for the regulation of interstate commerce – not the participation in it.
    Start using your money to fight back. Shun Obama supporters in business and reward his opponents. Give Oppenheimer extra business for fighting and pull money from Perella and others who caved.
    Do not advertise with or buy from Obamas supporters. Boycott hiring from schools supporting Obama (and other liberal idiocacy). Columbia, Harvard Law, Yale Law are good places to start. If the students and alumni can’t get hired they might start pressuring their Boards or even better take over the boards and return sanity to their institutions.
    Frankly I think the guy has severe mental issues stemming from being abandonded by his dad. He is more interested in his personal agenda than in what is best for the country. He writes a book, Dreams of My Father but he doesn’t know his father who he spent what, 2 months with? His father who a Kenyan gets a chance to go to Harvard is just a drunk, reportedly a bigamist, and then loses his legs in one drunken car wreck and doesn’t learn and kills himself in another.
    So we have the product of a naive idiot liberal and a drunken Kenyan loser bigamist as our President.

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