• 07 Apr 2009 at 11:34 AM

The ADA Market Will Save Us

seg1.jpgIt is a pity that what is probably the busiest the Executive Suite over at General Motors has been in the last twenty years is during its current preparation for a bankruptcy filing. And as tempting as it is to regard a filing for bankruptcy protection by the automaker as something of a triumph of rationality, it is, in fact, the reverse. It should be quite difficult not to be beyond pissed off at the billions of cash, taxpayer cash, that has been burned over the last many months, all for the sake of the PR gloss of calling the currency whirlpool a “going concern.” This also bodes rather poorly for the many financial institutions that would seem to be in similar condition, though perhaps with slightly less advanced pathology.
Of course, the news could be little more than the latest bit of leaked brinkmanship, but we think that ship has sailed.

General Motors Corp is in “intense” and “earnest” preparations for a possible bankruptcy filing, a source familiar with the company’s plans told Reuters on Tuesday.
A plan to split the company into a new company made up of the most successful units, and an ‘old company’ of its less-profitable units is gaining momentum and is seen as the company’s best configuration for the future, said another source familiar with the talks.

Don’t worry. Nothing is fucked. We are beyond certain that the current plan to mass produce wheelchairs with windscreens (note the wheelie wheels on the back!) in partnership with Segway (free colostomy bag with every purchase!) will pull the chestnuts out.
GM in “intense” bankruptcy preparations: source [Reuters]

22 comments (hidden to protect delicate sensibilities)
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Comments (22)

  1. Posted by guest | April 7, 2009 at 11:37 AM

    What, exactly, are the successful units??

  2. Posted by guest | April 7, 2009 at 11:39 AM
  3. Posted by guest | April 7, 2009 at 11:39 AM

    ever see that commercial with Howie making fun of Honda cause they make lawnmowers. Now i dont care who you are, dat der’s funny right there!

  4. Posted by guest | April 7, 2009 at 11:56 AM

    -@1 – The Unions.

  5. Posted by guest | April 7, 2009 at 12:04 PM

    Reading the GM-Segway story, and seeing the picture, is anyone surprised that GM is going BK (yes I know they are not going to BK solely because of this idea)? Also, can you imagine what would happen if you were driving that thing and got hit by a regular passenger car?

  6. Posted by guest | April 7, 2009 at 12:07 PM

    Someone please tell me what is wrong with a car company (or any company for that matter) going bankrupt and going away? Anyone remember Nash, DeSoto, Studebaker?

  7. Posted by guest | April 7, 2009 at 12:10 PM

    Why does anyone in their right mind think that partnering with Segway or GM is a good idea. They deserve each other.

  8. Posted by guest | April 7, 2009 at 12:13 PM

    GM bankruptcy preparations in full swing. What’s good for GM is good for America.

  9. Posted by guest | April 7, 2009 at 12:21 PM

    ho ho ho, you see my chidlren, i’m going to levy a $12,500-$18,500 tax per big car to combat global warming, so perhaps you should consider my sport power-wheel-chair?
    We aren’t banning big cars…we’re free market people. But yeah, we’re going to slightly twist your arm.
    Big Bro

  10. Posted by Anal_yst | April 7, 2009 at 12:28 PM

    Caddy, maybe Holden, Opel also

  11. Posted by guest | April 7, 2009 at 12:36 PM

    Show me your Tatas!!

  12. Posted by guest | April 7, 2009 at 12:50 PM

    If it has tits or tires on it, it’s going to cause you trouble.

  13. Posted by guest | April 7, 2009 at 12:53 PM

    Phil LeBeau needs to get off GM’s dick.

  14. Posted by guest | April 7, 2009 at 1:08 PM

    tell you what when Obama starts making rides around DC in this thing then I will think about buying…..wait on second thought no way

  15. Posted by KevinB | April 7, 2009 at 1:18 PM

    @5 – Why is GM going to Burger King? Isn’t White Castle a better deal?
    But looking at the PUMA- I can’t help but remember a comic from MAD Magazine in the 1960’s which forecast exactly this type of contraption being used by most Americans (whom they showed as universally obese), and then concluding that it would make the US “pushovers for the lean and hungry east”, with decidedly racist caricatures of Red Chinese invading. That’s what I call prescience.

  16. Posted by guest | April 7, 2009 at 1:35 PM

    I think this is a subversive move to scare middle Americans into supporting a larger bailout.
    The message is: Give us $25billion, or the gubmin’t is going to confiscate your SUV and force you to ride this rickshaw to work like a third-world peasant. No AC, no heat, only a thin plastic skin separating you and your kid from an oncoming delivery truck.
    Crafty, GM, very crafty.

  17. Posted by guest | April 7, 2009 at 1:41 PM

    If GM put their name on that they need to die.

  18. Posted by american bandersnatch | April 7, 2009 at 1:51 PM

    My insurance policies have suicide exemptions. Would the insurance co. be able to not pay out if I got killed in a puma?

  19. Posted by guest | April 7, 2009 at 2:09 PM

    @3 Honda does make lawn mowers. Maybe the reasons behind their success is because they consider themselves an engine company that happens to make automobiles and motorcycles. They also have a jet aircraft…
    GM’s last aircraft built was the TBM Avenger…
    At least Honda’s products don’t need water pumps and alternators replaced EVERY 30,000 miles. GM’s are junk.

  20. Posted by guest | April 7, 2009 at 6:52 PM

    As horrible as Tata’s $2000 nano.

  21. Posted by guest | April 7, 2009 at 7:26 PM

    No way in hell would I give up my big car to become Nancy Pelosi’s hood ornament.

  22. Posted by guest | April 8, 2009 at 12:23 AM

    Best headline on DB yet.