Nothing is fucked people. Nothing. Nothing at all. Green shoots are made thick oak. Cats have filed for voluntary separations from dogs and are no longer living together. Britney will retire from creating… anything. Including children. The Flu is cured. So is cancer. Just relax, will you?
Lawmakers in Washington are increasingly optimistic that the prospect of economic Armageddon is behind them.
Despite rising unemployment and continued dismal news in the housing market, which instigated the financial crisis, there’s been a definite shift in the Beltway’s economic mood.
“We’re headed toward the bottom,” said Rep. Paul Hodes (D-N.H.), who expects continued uncertainty in the economy but sees a recovery on the horizon.
“It will be a very slow, gradual recovery,” he said. “But it’s like falling off a cliff. It’s the place where the cliff hits the beach, that kind of end of collapse.”
…where your battered and crushed body will be gently nestled in a bloody bed of sand, quietly caressing you before the crabs begin to pick at your lips and the seagulls your eyes. How very beautifully peacefully consoling. Hey, how about you raise my taxes now?
Lawmakers don’t expect Armageddon [The Hill]
Slow news day I guess.
Umm… you’re not witty at all.
I don’t get it.
The only thing you fuckers need to understand is that Obama and the rest of us Dems fixed the economy you Rethugnicants broke. Bow down – line to the left.
Deficits don’t matter.
- R. Reagan
This, combined with the low vol numbers, means I should take my money out right about now. The rally will be over soon, folks.
Sell Equities buy hard gold,powerful rifles, and a cabin with solar panels, and a garage weapons foundry in rural Montana. The end is nigh!
I better get back to listening to Randy Savage now.
In Episode 8 of the Discovery Channel and CNBC’s “job switching” reality show, “Deadliest MBAs”, Capt. Ron of the crab fishing vessel, “Kodiak Star” has a hygiene issue after getting locked out of his trading floor with out a key card and uses the stairwell at Merril Lynch to “drop a few pots”. The MBAs from Lehman, onboard the Cornelia Marie, can’t figure out why Kodiak Island was named after a photography products company. Capt. Phil hocks up a bloody loogie after learning that the reason the Nymex called was because he leaned on the keyboard and accidentaly sold 85,000 lots of WTI “at market” as a result. Hedge fund MBAs on the Time Bandit drop hundreds of quarterly performance reports to clients via messages in corked bottles and feel satisfied with that effort. Back in New York, the quants take copious notes as Moi teaches them the “pull my finger” trick. Capt. Sig gets a complaint filed on him after a 30 hours of TARP hauling ends with a graphic demonstration of how crabs mate.
http://blog.al.com/spotnews/2009/05/birmingham_police_beating_vide.html
Whiskey. Tango. Foxtrot.
It is always refreshing to hear idiot politicians talk to the American public who are so intelligent.
wow- talk about miscommunication! I’d been workigno n something entirely different all along!
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Operation_Uranus
@10 why are you leaving that here? how in anyway does that have anything to do with matters discussed on dealbreaker?
If I came in my mouth by accident, does that make me a Democrat?
@13…..I didn’t know you could post comments from psychiatric wards. You are so resourceful. How does that make you feel?
@9 – How do I sign up to join the Birmingham PD?
Sincerely,
Ken Lewis
Since they didn’t seey Armageddon coming, and since they have spent trillions of future tax dollars trying to create the illusion that the crisis has been averted – what the hell else are they going to say?
I wouldn’t let maxine waters and barney frank manage my toliet paper purchasing let alone manage money that i hoped to actually see again in this lifetime.
@9
The beatings probably had something to do with the fact that dude ran over another cop who was in the middle of the highway dealing with an accident/other stop – check the first 10 or so seconds of that video.
That guy ain’t walking again…
I think I’d be hard pressed to say I wouldn’t get one good lick in after I saw a dude run over one of my own, ensuring he never walks again.
@4– Remove Obama’s tit from mouth, then speak. This administration’s mistakes will make the previous admin look like child’s play. The best part of it all: even my illegitimate children will pay for them…
8,
I patiently await the weekly updates.
As always, excellent work.
@ 18 what you talking about?
We got government motors, government sachs, and soon i expect the better part of california to become government housing.
@20
Until Snake Pliskin, together with the dude from Under Seige 2 use seismic-wave-generating satellites to trigger the “big one,” finally seperating California from the rest of the continental U.S.
Anal_yst – You must be very young. Plan A involves Lex Luthor using an M-X missile to seperate California as well as take out Hackensack. Plan B involves Under Sieg 2: Dark Territory
@4, “Obama and the rest of us Dems fixed the economy”
“Us”? Really? What did you do, specifically?
It’s time to put down your poster, buy a suit, and get a real job, son.
NOURIEL AND THE “DEAD FAT CAT BOUNCE”
WilliamBanzai7′s Book of Wall Street Fat Cats
Nouriel Roubini is such a prescient and fastidious Cat
He likes to lick his paws clean
Then tell us where we’re at.
When Fat Cats preen and prance
their cagey Fat Cat beat all over Fat Cat Town.
Nouriel emerges from his lair.
Then says “this is a dead Fat Cat bounce”
Those Fat Cats don’t think much of him
They say he’s as scaredy as a tweety bird.
But lets be serious do you really think
you should be following that Fat Cat herd?
Before the subprime Fat Cat meltdown.
Nouriel said with great disdain,
“That Fat Cat parade will be short lived
and forecast financial rain.”
Now some say economists are superstitious Cats
their predictions are absurd.
But me I’d sooner listen to that hip Cat Nouriel
than feast on Fat Cat turds.
@4 – Hmmm, let’s see . . .
John Mack – Democrat (Morgan Stanley)
Jamie Dimon – Democrat (JP Morgan)
Franklin Raines – Democrat (Fannie Mae)
Dick Fuld – Democrat (Lehman)
Lloyd Blankfein – Democrat (Goldman)
Stan O’Neal – Democrat (Merrill)
Dick Syron – Democrat (Freddie Mac)
Kerry Killinger – Democrat (Wamu)
Need me to go on? Because I can!
And Americans don’t bow to anyone! That’s Obama’s job.
@ 5 – Reagan never said that.
Gee, haven’t studied too much have you?
You probably think Clinton ran surpluses. Really? Check the debt numbers. If there were surpluses, how come the debt kept going up? Could it be . . . hmmm. . . bullshit? Could it be that the government takes the Social Security surpluses, loans them to the fed govt and counts that as income?
Nah, cause Clinton would never do that. mmm hmm.
Useless post, not even worth a comment, except this one to say it’s not worth a comment.
I come here for the poetry, and EP delivers.
26 Reagan did say that.
@28 – thank Gaia there are readers here without cranial-rectal impaction.
There’s nothing even mildly oblique about EP’s post and it is in fact worth having read.
So, haters: cork your pie-holes.
I can’t think of anyone less qualified to speak about the economy than NH’s Paul Hodes. He’s no Sununu, that’s for sure.
It’s not the fall that kills you. It’s the sudden stop.
@29 – No, Reagan did not say that.
Paul O’Neil said that Cheney said that. But there’s no evidence of that either.
You just wish Reagan said that because it would give you some justification for your irrational hatred of him.