Picture 1469.pngIf you’re anything like me, you’ve waited until the last 72 hours to cram for this beast of a cavity search on Saturday (the idea that you couldn’t master the hordes of information at the last minute were, frankly, a blow to your ego). Now, with T minus three days, there’s a legitimate concern that not only will this weekend’s administers be doing this without lube, but that there’s going to somehow be a tire iron involved. Your ability to form coherent sentences has been greatly compromised, and when people talk to you about dinner plans you wonder if they know you’re not listening to a thing they’ve said, but rather of stabbing a homeless person for not being able to remember how to calculate the portfolio variance with probabilities.
Clearly, I feel your pain. Because there’s comfort in numbers, I’m asking (begging) you to use this as a platform for venting. Commiseration and all that jazz. We’re all miserable, let’s be miserable together.


And come Saturday, I wish you luck; if we should happen run into each other at the bar afterward, don’t worry about having puked on yourself. It’s all part of the game.

165 comments (hidden to protect delicate sensibilities)
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Comments (165)

  1. Posted by girl | June 3, 2009 at 3:34 PM

    Hahah…Given they are different exams but that’s how I felt before the gmat. Hate to tell you that you probably won’t absorb anything new in the next few days but it wouldn’t be a bad idea to take a nice long run to calm your nerves. And take one of those friends up for dinner the night before- not a bad idea to go for steak (protein keeps you sharp).

  2. Posted by EZ2517 | June 3, 2009 at 3:36 PM

    I have friends who are CFAs, mostly in equity research.
    What’s your motivation for taking the test?

  3. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 3:37 PM

    Had a friend who got caught speeding on his way to the test, and had expired insurance and as such missed his test. I couldn’t bring myself to feel pity for him, as I am certain he would have bombed the test. Good luck Candidates!

  4. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 3:38 PM

    #1 they are NOT the same
    Last 3 days are most important for CFA exam
    Learn the seven ethic points and the FSA and you are all set
    Level 3 guys – Write Fast on the first part
    Level 2 guys – you are all screwed

  5. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 3:38 PM

    CFA – not worth the money that the exam is written on – otherwise, the experts probably wouldnt have flushed away much of the wealth they manage.
    Better you should spin the wheel and bet on red……….

  6. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 3:38 PM

    who are you

  7. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 3:40 PM

    Never understood the fetish with getting a CFA. I work at a PE fund and the only CFAs I interact with are lame-o auditors and a few toolish bankers.
    Also – who are you?

  8. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 3:41 PM

    Who are william dickles and george michaels? wtf have you done w/ bess and EP? is this like the bizarro DB site? answers immed.
    ps- dooshy first column. v original.
    givin u. ablumpklin, CFA

  9. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 3:43 PM

    lol @1. Cramming has gotten me so far in life already. Bring it, Level 2!!
    -Stuck at Boutique in Florida

  10. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 3:43 PM

    @8- are you an idiot? richards does opening bell. michaels is the new co-editor. bess is still here, as evidenced by all the posts with the byline “bess levin.”

  11. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 3:45 PM

    2 As you probably know, the exam is oriented towards investment management, both equities and fixed income. Popularity of it though has exploded. Obviously because its great to have on your resume and since its self study something you can be flexible about completing. Def a leg up in this kind of job environment. The naysayers say it only means that you can memorize well, but faced with a stack of resumes there’s no way a hiring manager isn’t going to look extra hard at the 5% that say CFA.

  12. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 3:45 PM

    I didn’t realize posting on DB required a CFA. Poor Greg is fucked.

  13. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 3:48 PM

    @7 the fact that your fund doesn’t interact with CFAs could speak to the legitimacy of your fund, not CFA holders. I’m sure you failed level I after studying for 6 months are just salty.
    @ richards, weak post. See Leverage Sellout’s ‘Chartered Financial Banalyst’ for a good CFA post.

  14. Posted by NegativeConvexity | June 3, 2009 at 3:49 PM

    Here’s one for y’all… [reproduced without anyones permission from elsewhere. And i suspect the culprit is none other than that deformed-testicle Greggy Michaels.]
    Re: Worst CFA Experiences
    Posted by: ccooper55 (IP Logged)
    Date: August 12, 2004 03:49PM
    This year, level III, NYC
    I am waiting for the bathroom in this massive line about 10 minutes before the start of the exam. There is this guy panicked out of his mind in line ahead of me who I noticed for the previous half hour had been rocking back and forth in the corner of the lobby murmering his notes back to himself from memory…a real whackjob.
    Anyway, As I am standing in line with this guy in front of me he starts to sweat profusely and I can litterally hear this guys stomach rumbling…this is where he really freaks out. He starts pounding on the stall doors ( there were only 2) and, of course, no one is coming out so this ass clown drops his pants, hops up on the sink, and blows SH**T all over the sink! The most disgusting thing was the backspray all over this guy! He was COVERED in his own Sh**t. I am laughing my ass off but this guy didnt miss a beat, he rinses off his pants, throws his shirt in the trash and walks into the test wearing only his windbreaker and wet pants.
    I could hardly stop laughing to myself a full half hour into the test…I knew then I was going to be alright because at least I didn’t just blow ass chunks all over the bathroom…priceless.

  15. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 3:49 PM

    7 Auditors have CPA’s. And not all PE funds are created equal. No fetish – just something that shows you’re smart and interested.

  16. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 3:49 PM

    CFA……….can’t fucking add (or subtract, divide or multiply for that matter)

  17. Posted by american bandersnatch | June 3, 2009 at 3:49 PM

    Why does Greg need to take the CFA? I thought he was set after making a killing cornering the market in FCOJ.

  18. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 3:50 PM

    My mailman is studying for the CFA…

  19. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 3:51 PM

    @12- your diss would’ve been funnier if it said anywhere on the post that reading DB required a CFA.

  20. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 3:52 PM

    Also cramming / starting to deal with the reality that I will have to retest in Dec….

  21. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 3:52 PM

    Why would you stab a homeless guy b/c you can’t remember some cfa shit you american psycho wannabe? Stabbing a homeless guy is only cool if you do it b/c he’s lazy.

  22. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 3:52 PM

    “richards, weak post. See Leverage Sellout’s ‘Chartered Financial Banalyst’ for a good CFA post.”
    what’s it like sucking the dick of a website that was funny in 2007, and hasn’t had relevance since then (as evidenced by the book flopping)?

  23. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 3:54 PM

    @ 11. if you have excellent undergrad and MBA schools and good background, CFA is totally pointless, even in this environment

  24. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 3:56 PM

    @23 book flopped, everyone knows that, congratulations captain obvious. I didn’t realize having a memory of something qualifies as ‘sucking its dick’.
    Next time, sign your posts Greg Michaels.

  25. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 3:57 PM

    Ditto on Level II being a bitch. Level I such a cakewalk that you don’t realize that II is going to be doom. Not to mention all of those Memorial Day holidays up in smoke.
    But yeah, always enjoyed seeing those people splayed out on the sidewalk beforehand, thinking that the 2 hours before the exam are going to make the difference. Give up, you’re toast.
    Fortunately they pass everybody in III. I guess they figure if you’ve gotten this far.

  26. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 3:58 PM

    level III pass rates have declined dramatically as too many damn people were getting the charter.

  27. Posted by EZ2517 | June 3, 2009 at 3:59 PM

    What I’m asking, Richards, is what YOU plan to do with your CFA? Blog for DB? Work for a wealthy English eccentric, valuing exotic assets?
    @4: I agree – L2 you’re so screwed…

  28. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 4:01 PM

    @25 Let’s hope so. It’d be nice to actually spend some time w/ my wife next spring for the first time in 3 years.

  29. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 4:02 PM

    My tailor is studying for the CFA…

  30. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 4:04 PM

    “Lets get together and have a good cry” is the code I use with my secretary when I want to pound her in the ass.

  31. Posted by merkin capital partners | June 3, 2009 at 4:05 PM

    @1
    Thank you for the study tips. Being that this is the first exam of my life I really appreciate it. What are your thoughts on how to handle bullying from the seniors?

  32. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 4:07 PM

    don’t knock it til you’ve tried it

  33. Posted by NegativeConvexity | June 3, 2009 at 4:07 PM

    [Part II of the above shit sandwich. I suspect the involved is Billy Richards.]
    Re: Worst CFA Experiences
    Posted by: hughj (IP Logged)
    Date: August 12, 2004 04:29PM
    NYC this summer, I’ squirting lemon in my iced tea (for a little caffeine pick me up) right before I walk in to the exam center. Some of it squirts the wrong way, gets me in right in the eyes and I literally, can’t see a thing. I ask someone to help me get to the bathroom so I can rinse my eyes. I feel around for the sink, run the water and immerse my face in the sink, and to my horror, it’s full of sh**! I scramble to find a paper towel and the bin’s empty! At this point I go rummaging through the garbage in sheer hysterics to find anything to wipe my face, and to my relief I find a discarded shirt. I wipe my face as quickly as possible w/ the shirt, only to find I’m caking on more sh**, and now I can’t see again. I was totally confused until Cooper’s post put the pieces together for me. BTW I think I did ok in the morning session, afternoon was a little tough.

  34. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 4:08 PM

    honestly, cfa was pretty f’ing easy as long as you put in 4+ months of studying.

  35. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 4:11 PM

    23 “If you have excellent undergrad and MBA schools…” Think about it – that’s a very small universe, esp when you just consider finance concentrations. Most people angle for advantages in other ways, hence the CFA. And the power of it is that it can level the playing field significantly for someone who’s academics or early career experience aren’t perfect.

  36. Posted by William Richards | June 3, 2009 at 4:13 PM

    @27/EZ2517
    “Work for a wealthy English eccentric, valuing exotic assets?”
    It depends on what she looks like and what your definition of exotic is.

  37. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 4:16 PM

    Oh Shit! Is that this Saturday.

  38. Posted by girl | June 3, 2009 at 4:16 PM

    @ Merkin, Anytime. Make sure to come back for next week’s installment: Sweet Bean Bags (to Jazz up you Dorm Room).

  39. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 4:19 PM

    35 Having been there, I wouldn’t say easy but certainly doable (with 4+ mos of study). Plus its easy to forget the anxiety – a lot of which is basically I-gotta-pass-this-cause-I’m-SO-SO-sick-of-spending-time-on-this-year-after-year-while-everyone-else-is-out-having-fun.

  40. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 4:20 PM

    Bad memories. My wife and I went through the program at the same time.
    It was painful, but worth it and it definitely helped my career. You might learn something too. OK, maybe not YOU.
    BTW, married MBA/CFA’s are way less dorky than married CPA’s.
    - 2001 CFA

  41. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 4:20 PM

    I’m up front by the door during the Level I AM session. A young woman asks the proctor for a break and gets a ‘yes’. She goes outside, comes back in, grabs the trash can, takes it out and I hear extensive barfing noises. She comes back and finishes the exam. Yeah, baby!

  42. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 4:24 PM

    Level III pass rate was 53% last year, 50% in 2007, and that’s people that passed I and II already and know their stuff. Does anybody on here actually work in the business or are you all just chilling post grad with mom?
    http://www.cfainstitute.org/aboutus/press/pdf/1963-2008A_candidate_examination_results.pdf

  43. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 4:31 PM

    The CFA is a homeless man’s MBA.
    “Yeah, I’ll study for some BS test for 3 years so I have more than an undergrad degree from Rutgers! Now people will take me seriously!”
    Most finance professionals laugh at the mention of a CFA. Its like a GED.

  44. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 4:32 PM

    we all had to pee in the sinks during the NY bar exam back in summer of ’91 — for some reason, despite thousands of test takers at the sploogiferous Javits Center, the fucktards had only a single mens’ room open so with only like three urinals and a couple of stalls (perennially occupied by the scared sh!tless) — no one wanted to wait in line like a bunch of chicks at Macy’s so one guy just sez “F@CK IT” and walks up to one of the sinks and pours it out — once that ice was broken everyone did the same and the line moved right along

  45. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 4:32 PM

    @42- the question is, did she pass?

  46. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 4:32 PM

    So I’m taking the exam in downtown Houston several years ago. The windows are open and there is a freight train line nearby with very loud horns blaring many times during both sessions. Late in the afternoon session it finally gets to one guy who lets out a groan/scream. He goes and slams a window shut and sits back down. But all the other windows are still open. The horns are just as loud as ever. The rest of us just keep working. Hope his test-taking skills were better than his problem-solving skills.

  47. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 4:32 PM

    My Coffee guy is studying for the CFA…

  48. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 4:37 PM

    you’re gonna fail miserably, so dont bother showing up

  49. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 4:39 PM

    Don’t you automatically get CFA certification in India with every plate of dal bhat?
    http://www.cfainstitute.org/aboutus/worldwide/asiapac/indiaFAQ.html
    CFA + University of Phoenix == BIG BUCKS!

  50. Posted by EZ2517 | June 3, 2009 at 4:40 PM

    W-Rich,
    1. She’s smoking hot. Over 40. Married into old money, now divorced. And bored.
    2. “Exotic” – well, well, well… Now this is where the imagination should run wild. Think coastal residential real estate, in far away places. A sort of portfolio of trysting spots/properties.
    To all you crammers, this should be sufficient motivation.
    You might also want to revisit “Cartman Gets an Anal Probe.”

  51. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 4:40 PM

    ahh. level II will be a cakewalk. i’ve taken it twice.

  52. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 4:41 PM

    I am a stockbroker in Bolivia. What is a CFA?

  53. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 4:41 PM

    “Most finance professionals laugh at the mention of a CFA”. 1) You’re wrong about that. 2) Ok, I’ll play along: What’s the downside in taking and passing the exam? Is it in fact damaging to have on a resume? Was that time better spent on something else? If so, tell me what.

  54. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 4:45 PM

    anyone got Cliff Notes?

  55. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 4:46 PM

    CFA = Boof MBA = FAIL

  56. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 4:46 PM

    @44 I assume you tacked on a 4+1 MBA from some 3rd tier school and now feel empowered. By the way, your back office cohort don’t count as ‘finance professionals’

  57. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 4:47 PM

    47 I didn’t think there was anyplace in Houston, esp in June, where the windows opened and there wasn’t air conditioning bringing things down to 65 degrees and 0% humidity. That must have been one sweaty exam room.

  58. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 4:49 PM

    The mail will be a little late Friday – I have my CFA exam Saturday and will be cramming. LI and II were a beyotch. Thanks.
    – Mail Guy

  59. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 4:50 PM

    My doorman is studying for the CFA…

  60. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 4:53 PM

    Guess which 2 of these 3 guys have passed LVL 2 of the CFA?
    http://www.guidofistpump.com/GuidoOompa.jpg

  61. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 4:53 PM

    my secretary would be studying…but you know

  62. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 4:54 PM

    We’re standing in line at about 8:30 to sign in with the proctor. A bunch of 20 & 30-something yuppies. Plus a few 40-somethings who think it’ll help them. (The 50 & 60 somethings know it’s too late.) And standing with us is a maybe 17-year old kid. They’re giving the SAT in the same building. Same floor. It started at 8. (First question: which one of these is not like the other?) So he loses another 15 minutes getting to the head of the line to find out he’s blowing it.

  63. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 4:57 PM

    Level II is as pleasant as having Dennis Kneale pound you with a cactus. For 4 straight months. The hope that Margaret Brennan will show more cleavage is what keeps me going.

  64. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 4:59 PM

    I’m laughing at the tools in here that don’t have what it takes to earn a CFA so they piss on everyone that tries for it.

  65. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 5:02 PM

    Serious question. What is more worthwhile, CFA or MBA from 2nd or 3rd Tier School?

  66. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 5:05 PM

    65 = some SUNY school alum and passed Level I
    turd

  67. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 5:06 PM

    Level I NYC Dec 2008
    Woke up morning of with the most ridiculous head cold ever. Got to the exam (stuffed to the gills with Dayquil) and the a-hole proctors won’t let me keep tissues on the desk. I had to stuff 4 packs of tissue in my pocket for each session, use the tissues and stuff them into my other pocket (and i went through them all), sneezing and hacking the whole time. Miraculously passed, possibly because I caused everyone in a 20 foot radius to fail.

  68. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 5:07 PM

    Okay next bachelor is number, um 124 on your program. He’s uh, he’s a high school graduate.
    Kramer whispers: Equivalent.
    Elaine: Oh, uh equivalency. A high school equivalency program graduate. He’s uh, self-employed. He’s…
    I don’t know, six foot three, 190 pounds, he likes, uh… fruit, and he just got uh, a haircut.
    Elaine: Okay uh, why don’t we start the bidding. Do I hear, uh, five bucks?

  69. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 5:10 PM

    @34–I almost fell off my chair when I read that. Sad thing is I can actually see someone coming back in to the exam to finish with shit smeared all over their face.
    I passed level III in 2001. Definately can’t recommend the test site as a pick-up place. 1,500 test takers; no more than 2 hotties.
    Overall opinion: Resume builder, yes; downside, no.
    –another 2001 CFA

  70. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 5:12 PM

    I’m not going to be able to drive my cab on Saturday because I have to take the CFA.

  71. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 5:13 PM

    My secretary is taking the CFA because she thinks she won’t get pounded in the arse if she passes.

  72. Posted by AndrewInGreenwich | June 3, 2009 at 5:15 PM

    @66
    It depends what you want to do, but I feel strongly that and MBA from a 2nd or 3rd tier school is useless(at best) if you want to work at an ibank or get onto the buy side.
    The CFA is valued at some funds, but it isn’t a given.

  73. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 5:15 PM

    @34- that was me — do you still have my shirt?

  74. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 5:16 PM

    The CFA is valued at SAC, FYI.

  75. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 5:17 PM

    where’s the DB NY afterparty? will be a humdinger…10,000 finance nerds with shattered dreams

  76. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 5:18 PM

    @76- can’t wait to see you there.

  77. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 5:24 PM

    @29, so you’ll be hanging around more?!??! guess that games over, its been nice with your wife for the past 3 years!

  78. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 5:29 PM

    Only one in five who enter the CFA Program ultimately earn the Charter. All you have to do to earn your MBA is show up.

  79. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 5:35 PM

    @77 look me up – I’ll be the one rocking back and forth and clutching an HP12C – @76

  80. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 5:38 PM

    “but rather of stabbing a homeless person for not being able to remember how to calculate the portfolio variance with probabilities.”
    I was going to talk more trash about how easy of a formula this is to figure out, but then @ 1 said he felt the need to cram for the GMAT. Can we raise the bar around here a little bit people. If I get caught on this f-in site at work, it will be twice as bad if my boss realizes I’m reading posts from a pack of DB’s with Down’s Syndrome.

  81. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 5:39 PM

    @79 – The top business schools in the country have acceptance rates much lower than 20%….you’re in the CFA program though so i figured you wouldn’t be able to tell me that 10% is less than 1/5th.

  82. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 5:44 PM

    @81- where do you work that after seeing out of the corner of his eye that you’re on DB, your boss will proceed to read the comments to assess the situation? dunder mifflin? cause I can see Michael Scott doing something like that.

  83. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 5:44 PM

    @81- and yet, I’m guessing knowing how to calculate it isn’t that high on homeless people’s list of priorities. Idiot.

  84. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 5:47 PM

    CFA is a joke. it is a totally antiquated certification. Get it if you want to do sellside equity research or some other total bullshit job like fund of funds. it’s a crutch for people who dont have real skill.

  85. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 5:51 PM

    I have an MBA from wharton. Some of my classmates who had CFAs did not know a fucking thing about finance. These guys could not even do homework for intro finance classes.
    All a CFA designation tells me is you had some slack job where you had enough free time to study for that bullshit. If you had a serious finance job where you are doing real shit you would not have time to take certification test for some bogus “institute.”

  86. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 6:14 PM

    I owe my charter to being able to cram the ethics between the am and pm sessions. Still don’t know why I went to the trouble. I don’t even put it on my business card. I don’t laugh at people who do, like the tools who put “MBA” on their business cards, but I can’t honestly say that it has helped me in any way.
    Good luck to all, though. I don’t miss wasting Memorial Day weekend or having to use an HP12C instead of my trusty 19B

  87. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 6:15 PM

    Nouriel Roubini is studying for the CFA…

  88. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 6:18 PM

    I wonder how many unemployed CFA’s now realize the designation means nothing!

  89. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 6:31 PM

    @65 – I’m laughing at the CFA’s in here that don’t have what it takes to bone their secretary in the arse.
    o thats right…you don’t have a secretary

  90. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 6:33 PM

    For asset management, the CFA is a major plus and means alot.
    For other finance jobs (IB, et al), think of the CFA as an very good resume builder that will help you land an interview. This is especially true if you went to a terrible school like me or had a poor GPA (also like me).
    If you have already gone to a good school, are on a great career track (connections), or have a top tier MBA, then a CFA is not worth much.

  91. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 6:52 PM

    MBA’s vs. the CFA’s
    The passing rate of the CFA compared to the graduation rate for grad schools…is this really a contest?

  92. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 7:32 PM

    @86 ahhhh the token Wharton D’bag has got to chime in. Whatever you say pal. Apparently you know all there is to learn.
    “I have an MBA from wharton. Some of my classmates who had CFAs did not know a fucking thing about finance. These guys could not even do homework for intro finance classes.”

  93. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 7:38 PM

    I am studying for the CFA with a guy from Wharton who has failed this level 3x already. So maybe thats saying something about the value of a Wharton MBA

  94. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 7:51 PM

    Here’s the deal with the CFA:
    Those who are good at finance don’t need them. Their abilities, history and attitude speak for themselves louder than any certification ever will.
    For everyone else, it helps give them an edge over anyone with similar qualifications.

  95. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 7:51 PM

    I have a Wharton MBA, A Yale JD, and an Undergrad in engineering from MIT but my secretary still won’t let me pork her in the arse.

  96. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 8:47 PM

    She’s got a PhD from Harvard …

  97. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 8:47 PM

    Philosophy question of the day:
    If you have a CFA, can you bang your own arse? Or have you already f’ed yourself in the arse by telling people you are taking the finance equivalent of a GED?
    Thoughts?

  98. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 8:51 PM

    @96 — because you’ve spend your whole friggin life in school, the secretary went out and bought a big black strap-on and is pounding you in the ass each and every day.
    At least you might have the ability to figure out the margins on said black strap on, the indecency laws that you were breaking by allowing yourself to be ass-pounded by a report, and then calculate the torque that was being applied to your shitter.
    Enjoy your life.

  99. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 9:04 PM

    you retards have it all wrong
    MBA + CFA = secretary who will do ATM and not kiss you after……….MBA alone—-you fully get a snowball

  100. Posted by merkin capital partners | June 3, 2009 at 9:05 PM

    72,90,96,98
    Please stop saying arse. It’s ass. I bet you sign your emails, “Cheers!”. Fag.

  101. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 9:09 PM

    Lots of jokers and lots of posers on this site .. guarantee that CFAs know much more than an MBA. CFA means you have a baseline level of knowledge, MBA means you have a baseline level of network.

  102. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 9:20 PM

    @101 – i bet you take it up the arse

  103. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 9:23 PM

    @99 – im pretty sure 96 was a joke – assclown…or is it arseclown, 101?

  104. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 9:26 PM

    CFA: if you have it no one cares, if you do not have it that can be a major problem unless you have a tier one MBA…
    Calgreedy

  105. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 10:10 PM

    I hear bess does ATM and facials for guys with CFAs……..

  106. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 10:21 PM

    I was pounding the secretary in the … this morning. I told him I hope he enjoyed it as much as I did.
    Jamie

  107. Posted by guest | June 3, 2009 at 11:14 PM

    too level 2, didnt level 3

  108. Posted by guest | June 4, 2009 at 1:05 AM

    This is the Gayest, most useless post I’ve ever read on DB, better yet, just ever read.
    I don’t give a shit about fucking retards taking a test.

  109. Posted by guest | June 4, 2009 at 7:25 AM

    asset management = mutual funds or fund of funds = no real skill so in need of a bogus designation to try to dress up resume
    CFA is about as legit as a bartending license

  110. Posted by guest | June 4, 2009 at 7:48 AM

    @109- and, yet, you took the time to comment. if you weren’t such a fucking retard yourself, you would’ve moved on.

  111. Posted by guest | June 4, 2009 at 9:44 AM

    CFA is for suckers

  112. Posted by guest | June 4, 2009 at 10:03 AM

    Laughing at the people trying to convince everyone getting an MBA is actually tough. The hardest part is filling out the applications and showing up.

  113. Posted by guest | June 4, 2009 at 10:04 AM

    all you need for an MBA is $10 and a guy in Chinatown.

  114. Posted by guest | June 4, 2009 at 10:06 AM

    110 I’m wondering what kind of work you do? Trader boy maybe? Kind of job that requires wits rather than brains? CFA would def be worthless to you. However, see the story about the Bear floor broker now the host at Palm downtown.

  115. Posted by guest | June 4, 2009 at 10:09 AM

    113 Totally agree here. The thing about top MBA programs is the initial screening and the resulting high quality networking possibilities. At the end of the day they teach the same thing at Chicago that they do at St. Johns.

  116. Posted by guest | June 4, 2009 at 10:10 AM

    My neighbor’s cat is studying for the CFA…

  117. Posted by guest | June 4, 2009 at 10:17 AM

    Read 91 and 95 and if it applies – as it should to 80% of the people here – then go on line and get the app for Level I next December.

  118. Posted by guest | June 4, 2009 at 10:23 AM

    Its interesting that any article that revs up the competitive spirits here really brings out the comments. In addition to the CFA/MBA good/bad debates this would also include pics of hot women (I can get her if I just step up here everyone thinks) and even hot men (remember the Michael Phelps thing – guys get jealous and feel a need to step up and also be heard). Just sayin.

  119. Posted by guest | June 4, 2009 at 11:12 AM

    considering price.. the return on the cfa has to wayy wayy wayy outperform that of an mba

  120. Posted by guest | June 4, 2009 at 11:23 AM

    Here’s some consolation for those of you who will fail the CFA this weekend: it doesn’t matter. We won’t hire anybody without a graduate degree into any kind of a senior role, and a CFA just don’t cut it. Our junior analysts are taking it and hoping it will help them become senior. It won’t You either are or you aren’t, and the letters you need to bridge the gap are not CFA.

  121. Posted by guest | June 4, 2009 at 11:26 AM

    anything that gets you ATM with bess is worth the investment

  122. Posted by guest | June 4, 2009 at 12:15 PM

    CFA = Asset Management
    MBA = IB / PE
    People in the latter group just have their heads too far up their own ass to realize this and therefore disparage the designation.

  123. Posted by guest | June 4, 2009 at 12:18 PM

    @121 they just told you that so you’d stop begging for a promotion/raise

  124. Posted by guest | June 4, 2009 at 12:22 PM

    121 It only doesn’t matter if every firm was like yours. And they’re not. I work in asset management. Almost every job description I come across says MBA and or CFA. Not saying that the CFA alone is better than an MBA. Or just as good as both. Or a CFA is better than a second tier MBA. The factors that will truly land you a job or promotion are too complex to generalize about here. What’s undeniable however is that in asset management at least and despite what you lazy haters say the CFA gets you into the game, puts you at an advantage.

  125. Posted by guest | June 4, 2009 at 12:27 PM

    asset management is for C players of finance.

  126. Posted by guest | June 4, 2009 at 12:31 PM

    125 again… and let me add that part of the value comes from customer perceptions. When comparing firms, clients always look at the percentage of analysts that have a CFA charter.

  127. Posted by guest | June 4, 2009 at 12:35 PM

    126 Actually I’d love to be a hedge fund baller, but that’s like wanting to have looks like Tom Cruise. Its just not in the cards for most people. Same but a little less so for top of the game in Ibanking (which though boring pays well). I make an extremely good living. It therefore doesn’t matter what you think.

  128. Posted by guest | June 4, 2009 at 12:42 PM

    126 I’m curious as to where you think the A and B players are.

  129. Posted by guest | June 4, 2009 at 1:11 PM

    126 here.
    129, that is a very good question. From what I can tell 98% of finance people fall in the C player category. We are all lemmings. Precious few of us actually have an independent original thought WITH balls to act on them.
    I will rephrase what I said. There are some fields where CFA is basically useless. If you are a sellside trader (flow guys) then CFA won’t do much. Most hedge funds won’t care if you have CFA especially if they are not equity or credit shop (I think it is arguable that hedge fund that trades equity or credit is in fact any different from mutual funds but i digress).
    Areas where people seem to REQUIRE CFA designation are where those people do not have direct investing responsibility. And by that I am referring to sellside equity research, fund of funds, investment consultants and fund marketing. These roles do not entail duties where one can actually shine on his/her investing ability. Hence they seem to place greater value on certification.
    I don’t see any special value of MBA either. But if you have a top tier MBA it helps you get interviews. It’s no different than if you had goldman, blackstone or citadel on your resume.
    MBA is totally useless if you are outside “Top 5″ (and there are about 10 schools in this Top 5 category)

  130. Posted by guest | June 4, 2009 at 3:34 PM

    126/130 – good math you must have an mba and cfa………..or maybe you just work for the SEC :)

  131. Posted by guest | June 5, 2009 at 12:49 AM

    For what it’s worth, I used to work on the prop credit desk of a European bank before the group was disbanded last year.
    My guess is about two-thirds of the traders/analysts had the CFA. So the designation must be of value for some of the bank’s most talented people to pursue it.

  132. Posted by guest | June 5, 2009 at 8:29 AM

    didn’t you say the group was disbanded?
    what did the prop credit group do? just go long credit until 2007? there is no skill in that.

  133. Posted by guest | June 5, 2009 at 9:15 AM

    Anyone have the first year #’s on my secretary’s A?

  134. Posted by guest | June 5, 2009 at 1:59 PM

    The bathroom attendant at Penthouse is studying for the CFA…
    I pounded my concierge’s rather than my secretary’s.
    Kobe

  135. Posted by guest | June 5, 2009 at 3:20 PM

    Hilarious! I am about to take L2 tomorrow… cramming won’t get you far for this beast… also, kudos to the person who put of the ridiculous story from analystforum. Good luck to everyone on all three levels. Level 1 peeps, make sure you nail ethics, they are liable to grade your exam by a higher standard otherwise. Is it just me or is anyone else looking forward to getting their lives back??

  136. Posted by guest | June 5, 2009 at 8:23 PM

    so much left to learn aaaaaaaarrrggghhh!!!!

  137. Posted by guest | June 5, 2009 at 8:36 PM

    There is a gun show around the corner from the Denver (Merchandise Mart) test center…hmmm. Good luck!

  138. Posted by guest | June 5, 2009 at 9:28 PM

    Kobe @135, the concierge is a dude, right?

  139. Posted by guest | June 6, 2009 at 10:15 PM

    cfa is a know it or you dont test.. just memorize the definition of every world in BOLD and you will be OKAY

  140. Posted by guest | June 6, 2009 at 10:16 PM

    cfa is a know it or you dont test.. just memorize the definition of every world in BOLD and you will be OKAY

  141. Posted by guest | June 6, 2009 at 11:07 PM

    Comment removed by moderator.

  142. Posted by guest | June 6, 2009 at 11:20 PM

    @142
    hey! hey! hey! f you!
    if it was a waste of time, why did you sit for the exam?
    btw, it’s called professional development brah!

  143. Posted by guest | June 7, 2009 at 12:09 PM

    >143 fyi, just sat for exam to show you tools that cfa is really worthless if you know what know what u doing in trading, fool. im guessing that you a lonely tool who thinks that cfa will get you more $$$ or trim. Wrong. MBA or CFA there are bs that was established by munch of white boys who decided to fuck the other races in making $$$. They want to keep it all to themselves. I m thinking you 143 is one of them other races? Keep tryn, but u always be looking up the white mans ass.

  144. Posted by guest | June 7, 2009 at 7:29 PM

    “Only one in five who enter the CFA Program ultimately earn the Charter. All you have to do to earn your MBA is show up.”
    That’s because ANYONE can start the CFA program. To get into a top 100 FT ranked MBA school, you need a GMAT score of 650 plus and higher for a top 10 school. That would instantly weed out 95% of CFA candidates! LBS MBA Grad 2003. Run a resource focused PE fund in Mayfair and we have no CFA’s working for us. We hire accountants instead as they are more useful and dont’ have the “can’t do” attitudes that CFA’s tend to…
    JMHO

  145. Posted by guest | June 7, 2009 at 10:09 PM

    Hope the homeless person stabbed you first.

  146. Posted by guest | June 8, 2009 at 1:41 AM

    145
    hahaha so many MBAs are such tools
    case in point: you
    and your “resource focused PE fund”- how’s that working out? sorry to hear you’re behind on that Mayfair rent
    I’m not a CFA but I don’t make fun of people doing things I can’t do, and cloak it in some strange superiority complex

  147. Posted by guest | June 8, 2009 at 3:44 PM

    @147
    Damn right you’re “not a CFA”. I’d have to write you up to the institute for referring to the designation as a noun. And don’t let me hear you claim that it makes you a superior investment manager…

  148. Posted by guest | June 8, 2009 at 5:35 PM

    145 Question for you LBS grad: wasn’t Monica Lewinsky in your class (2003)? Not sure if she actually graduated, but I do know that she was admitted. So much for high standards.

  149. Posted by guest | June 8, 2009 at 9:39 PM

    what is this LBS place? where does it rank relative to the holy trinity H/S/W

  150. Posted by guest | June 8, 2009 at 10:14 PM

    WTF are wankers from LBS doing here? GTFO.

  151. Posted by guest | June 8, 2009 at 10:38 PM

    LBS = London Business School. Most Yanks confuse it with London School of Economics, which is actually a very ordinary place. LBS is the good one. But yes, someone I know that went there reported that Monica Lewinski was one of his classmates. Again, can someone confirm if she graduated?

  152. Posted by invmgr | June 9, 2009 at 12:15 AM

    @149 HBS has equally high standards
    http://www.thecrimson.com/article.aspx?ref=513563

  153. Posted by guest | June 9, 2009 at 12:47 AM

    @150-> googled it
    LBS=London Metropolitan Business School
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/London_Metropolitan_University

  154. Posted by guest | June 10, 2009 at 5:04 PM

    What’s the entrance exam to study for the CFA? I assume that, as it’s sooooo hard to pass, that not just anyone can enroll. Otherwise, any idiot could take the tests…no? Or, maybe there’s no entrance exam which would probably have something to do with the low pass rates.
    I’ve enrolled my cat for the CFA. With a 50% pass rate, Mittens has as good as chance as any.

  155. Posted by guest | June 10, 2009 at 5:06 PM

    What’s the entrance exam to study for the CFA? I assume that, as it’s sooooo hard to pass, that not just anyone can enroll. Otherwise, any idiot could take the tests…no? Or, maybe there’s no entrance exam which would probably have something to do with the low pass rates.
    I’ve enrolled my cat for the CFA. With a 50% pass rate, Mittens has as good as chance as any.

  156. Posted by guest | June 10, 2009 at 5:06 PM

    What’s the entrance exam to study for the CFA? I assume that, as it’s sooooo hard to pass, that not just anyone can enroll. Otherwise, any idiot could take the tests…no? Or, maybe there’s no entrance exam which would probably have something to do with the low pass rates.
    I’ve enrolled my cat for the CFA. With a 50% pass rate, Mittens has as good as chance as any.

  157. Posted by guest | June 10, 2009 at 11:52 PM

    ^ entrance exam is no duplicate posting on dealbreaker.com

  158. Posted by guest | July 28, 2009 at 11:04 AM

    If you can not pass level 1…make sure you can get your head in front of the bullet. You have no value to society. I suggest a glass of champagne and then leap from a roof if you do not have access to a gun.

  159. Posted by guest | July 28, 2009 at 11:04 AM

    If you can not pass level 1…make sure you can get your head in front of the bullet. You have no value to society. I suggest a glass of champagne and then leap from a roof if you do not have access to a gun.

  160. Posted by guest | July 28, 2009 at 12:20 PM

    @ All:
    The fact that there are 160 flaming dorks arguing the intricacies of the CFA makes me ashamed to read DB.

  161. Posted by guest | July 28, 2009 at 12:27 PM

    @ All:
    The fact that there are 160 flaming dorks arguing the intricacies of the CFA makes me ashamed to read DB.

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