When we heard that Paul Tudor Jones had given a commencement speech to the graduating class at the Buckley School on the topic of failure, we feared it’d be some sort of personal growth exercise in which PTJ blathered on about the trauma of last year, and how even though he was down and out, he came back triumphant in ’09 (because Tudor BVI Global only lost about 4.5 percent for 2008, a relative win compared to his colleagues in the field, PTJ would have the strength to talk about the humbling experience, unlike those who did considerably worse and aren’t ready to go there). Apparently, not so much.
Instead, he told a room of 14 year old boys and their parents about the time he got left at the altar. And what he learned from not being able to rescue a group of underprivileged Bed-Stuy kids from becoming a statistic. At various points he says things like “Failure will give you a tattoo that will stay with you your whole life” and “Shame can be a lifetime companion for which you better prepare yourself.” The whole thing is summed up thusly: “Here is the point: you are going to meet the dragon of failure in your life.” Not just failure. The DRAGON of failure. The beast of failure. The Loch Ness Monster Of Failure.
So: kind of dark! And a pinch heavier than expected. Nevertheless, actually a very good, moving read (that includes Mardis Gras references and talk of restarting the Civil War). Plus, let’s not forget how this story ends: with the greatest show on earth.
Paul Tudor Jones – Failure Speech June 2009
[Paul Kedrosky via Clusterstock]
why did he have to mention the kids were african american?
Was he a bed wetter?
Yes, refers to the South as “our side” during the War.
Good speech. refreshing to not hear someone talk about how charmed their life’s been.
I am pretty sure that he molested me once at the country club.
Spalding
I’m keepin it real, B, damn. You know I’m just keeping it real.
why did he have to mention the kids were african american?
Were the kids african american? Were there any young mexican coke shark children in the crowd?
Also, were the kids african american?
… and, should you fail enough, you just might be good enough to serve the GOP on Capitol Hill. But that, is only for those of you who can REALLY fuck up…
I bet a coke up Mexican Cocaine Shark would have eaten all those children and not batted an eyelid over that black, black, eye.
Yum.
Did you just call me a chimp, friend?
I’m not your friend, chimp.
We set a date; we sent out the invitations; and all was fantastic until one month before the wedding when her father called me. He said, “Paul, my daughter sat me down this afternoon, and she doesn’t know how to tell you this, but she is really unhappy and thinks it’s time for you two to take a break.” At first I thought he was joking because he was a very funny guy. Then he said, “No, she is serious about this.”
@12 damn that’s cold
isn’t today free for all Friday?
I’m not your friend, chimp.
Don’t call me friend, Chico.
@12 bitch had her father call the guy? ouch
I am not a chimp, pal.
Don’t call me Chico, donkey face.
Something tells me the chick who dumped him is kicking herself now after the whole “PTJ turns out to be a billionaire” thing.
Kids, I’d like to tell you the time I was diagnosed with testicular cancer and had to have a ball lopped off.
– Larry Robbins
@20 Being dumped drove him to success. She’s currently married to a wealthy plumber, Mario, from Greenwich.
isn’t there a special scholarship at buckley for underprivleged coked up african mexican sharks who suck at basketball?
@12 well, I’m sure whoever she did marry is also worth >$3B. Really, he lives in a van? Well, at least she handled it well and didn’t burn any bridges. oh wait…
@23 – That’s the Quint memorial scholarship. Sponsored by the Cali group.
@12 her current husband runs the second best Arby’s in providence
@24- Bess should find her and interview HER about failure for DB
What would you do if in the middle of the night you woke up and found Eliot Spitzer in a shark costume wandering around your bedroom? What would you do?
“Failure will give you a tatoo that will stay with you your whole life”
“Shame can be a lifetime companion for which you better prepare yourself.”
He looks a lot like David Hyde Pierce.
@17 this was before texting.
@24 hedge fund wife is no life. http://dealbreaker.com/2009/06/hedge-fund-wives-being-forced.php
I…I think I’ve made a terrible mistake.
–PTJ’s ex-girlfriend
28- I’ll take coke and african american Buckley students for $1000 alex
@28 – depends on whether he’s coked up or not. If he is then straight out the window with him. If he leaves Ashley “those breasts never get old” Dupré behind then all the better.
@31- she could’ve called him herself
I sure wish I had gotten this speech instead of the ‘Carpe Diem’ crap they were handing out at my circa-Dead Poets Society graduation. This may have been useful.
@28 – I would encase him in formaldehyde and proudly display him to my coworkers, of course.
…Or, perhaps I would don my lobsterclops costume and ask him to dance.
And even if you fail, one day, you too can have Greenwich’s Greatest Xmas Spectacular!
http://dealbreaker.com/2008/12/paul-tudor-jones-throws-christ.php
@38 – For Bess.
Old news but … what the hell does this mean?
“Greenwich police have asked visitors (investors) to say in their cars while checking it out.”
Say what? How much they hate Greenwich and Cliffy? Pray tell ..
I sense another literary project. Almost-But-Not-Quite Hedge Fund Wives. The best part about it is that they are already used to buying $13 bottles of Merlot. So they are way ahead of the game.
@28 – wtf?
@39– obviously you understand it was a typo that should’ve read “stay.” but yeah, cliff sucks.
36,
Did you go to a certain school in Bloomfield Hills, MI?
@40 I like that idea a whole lot.
what happens when life itself turns out to be the failure?
What’s with the pinky ring?
I’m gettin kinky in your stinky while just usin my pinky…
drops the mike.
@45 – 1-800- Samaritans – Call NOW!
45>McCann’s Bar>OTB>lather>rinse>repeat until death
@Bess- I’m here for the hug (and maybe the copping of a feel?)
-PTJ
The pinky ring– kinda gay
good speech
Is he hiring?
I can only imagine Greg O’Melia’s face during that. Priceless. Nice speach. Did not know he was a dad.
Buckley is a great school. PTJ is an admirable commencement speaker and that was a well written and inspirational speech. Not really worthy of parody. My 2 cents. But I have a bias.
@55 1. Everything is worthy of parody (also: do you know what a parody is? This wasn’t one). 2. Thank you for failing to grasp that, in spite of thing being darker than I would’ve expected, I expressly stated that I enjoyed the speech. My 2 cents.
4 cents, 1 cup.
Get’em Bess! Get em!!
I always like it when the writer comments on the comments. Sorta matacomment stuff.
It’s “meta,” not “mata.”
Come here Paul, let me give you a blumpkin. It’ll make everything allllright.
Been a surge in real people commenting in this blog lately. Makes me feel I’m in the wrong place.
@62
Where are these so-called “real people” of which you speak?
@63 well there was the soon to be Internet Czar Meg Ryan for one
Bess, you are a bit off today. Not by much though.
@65- what are you talking about? this was excellent, as was the pandit fatty post, the cnbc porno, and, most expecially, the jim cramer curse.
PTJ is a true class act. Great speech.
maybe the failure of which he speaks is the nickel or dime bags he was doing while cheating on his wife — then along came Robin Hood………………
Bl, this is 55, you did say that you liked it.. but your write up was too long did’nt read the whole thing.. did read the speech tho…
@69- don’t know the meaning of parody and can’t get through three paragraphs? fail.
@69- thank you for jumping on my cock before even getting through the whole post! I’ll send you a hundo for your time
-PTJ
That was a great speech.
That was a nice speech.
Although, there is a trend developing of people trying to write and give the most moving, quirky speeches–adapting a regular guy plain language tone, and pretending not to say anything moral, while making homespun life parables about living fully.
Of course it helps get your speech passed around the internet or printed by a publisher if you are dying from cancer or something. Is PTJ dying?
Finn2lzy2login
@73 pretty sure you don’t have to be dying to have your speech passed around the internet. Being a multi-billionaire will do it.
Apropos speech since Buckley fails in general.
-Allen-Stevenson grad.
gotta give PTJ credit: that was a good speech.
@76 pretty sure bess/DB did give PTJ credit (see: “actually a very good read with some quite moving parts”).
@76- Bess quite clearly gave PTJ credit, and even called the speech “moving.” When has that ever happened on DB? I doubt PTJ is so sensitive that he can’t take what was some EXTREMELY gentle ribbing beforehand the compliment.
Buckley boys suck big time.
– Kincaid and Andover alum
PS. I could have said that speach in 2 words: Never misunderestimate me.
@79- but can you spell “speech” correctly?
The next time the dragon of failure reared its ugly head was when I woke up and realized my actual job is writing snarky comments on a financial gossip blog. What a pathetic waste of life.
@81- oh, you must have really hurt bess bad with that one.
@81 which you read (without comprehension, having failed to note that the guy whose cock you apparently ride– PTJ’s– was complimented on his speech), get upset about, and comment on like a little bitch.
@81- yes, 81, it’s so very snarky to describe something as a “very good read” and emotionally “moving.” perhaps try taking a second furiously masturbating to pics of PTJ to comprehend that it’s okay to say we thought this was going to be one thing, it turned out to be another, and we liked it. douche bag.
81 = Cliff Asness
Yeah because Tudor was a big client to JPMorgan, we had a black kid from one of his charities on our desk for a few weeks during the summer a few years ago.
He did nothing except play video games. He expressed no interest in what we did or the markets, and would only talk about rap stars and video games.
What a waste! Why should a deadbeat like this be given such a summer job, when there are thousands of more motivated kids who would kill for such a position and use it as a door into a banking career, rather than just see it as a few hundred bucks a week!
“The Lock Ness Monster Of Failure” = fail!
Maybe you were referring to Nessie: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Loch_ness_monster
Yeah because Tudor was a big client to JPMorgan, we had a white kid from one of his charities on our desk for a few weeks during the summer a few years ago.
He did nothing except play video games. He expressed no interest in what we did or the markets, and would only talk about rap stars and video games.
What a waste! Why should a deadbeat like this be given such a summer job, when there are thousands of more motivated kids who would kill for such a position and use it as a door into a banking career, rather than just see it as a few hundred bucks a week!
This shit still burns me up all these years later.
Yeah because Tudor was a big client to JPMorgan, we had an Asian kid from one of his charities on our desk for a few weeks during the summer a few years ago.
He did nothing except play video games. He expressed no interest in what we did or the markets, and would only talk about rap stars and video games.
What a waste! Why should a deadbeat like this be given such a summer job, when there are thousands of more motivated kids who would kill for such a position and use it as a door into a banking career, rather than just see it as a few hundred bucks a week!
This shit still burns me up all these years later.
Yeah because Tudor was a big client to JPMorgan, we had a coked up Mexican Cocaine Shark from one of his charities on our desk for a few weeks during the summer a few years ago.
He did nothing except play video games. He expressed no interest in what we did or the markets, and would only talk about rap stars and video games.
What a waste! Why should a deadbeat like this be given such a summer job, when there are thousands of more motivated kids who would kill for such a position and use it as a door into a banking career, rather than just see it as a few hundred bucks a week!
This shit still burns me up all these years later.
@90 nice
Yeah because [Name Your Fund] was a big client to JPMorgan, we had a white kid who was a PM’s spoiled brat on our desk for a few weeks during the summer a few years ago.
He did nothing except play video games. He expressed no interest in what we did or the markets, and would only talk about the Dead and lacrosse.
What a waste! Why should a deadbeat like this be given such a summer job, when there are thousands of more motivated kids who would kill for such a position and use it as a door into a banking career, rather than just see it as a few hundred bucks a week!
92 There’s a name for this phenomenon: shirtsleeves to shirtsleeves in three generations. Its seems like every other successful Wall Street person I know has a child in film school.
Yeah because the governor was a big client of the Emperor’s Club we had a white bitch who was an escort’s illegitamte child on our desk for a few weeks during the summer a few years ago.
She did nothing except play with my balls and stroke my shaft. She expressed no interest in what we did or the markets, and would only talk about A2M and DP threesomes.
What a waste! Why should a crack ho like this be given such a summer job, when there are thousands of more motivated coeds from the ivys who would bend over in such a position and take it in the back door for a wanking career, rather than just see it as a few hundred bucks a night!
My pee still burns all these years later.
@94 nice work
@94 – FTW
94- well done.
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