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a time machine
that was so gay.
- homo banker.
LD’s going to have to start doing retarded gay porn to pull himself out of this hole.
a whole lot of cocksucking, $10 a pop
Those are actually discarded hypodermic needles he’s standing on.
Nails is screwed.
he looks a lot like ryan phillipe.
@3 it worked for me.
-Burt Reynolds, noted former bankrupt individual
http://dealbreaker.com/2009/07/lenny-dykstra-tells-his-side-o.php
Lenny “I Can Suck A Baseball Through a Garden Hose” Dykstra
DB should pimp LD out to hard-up bankers in need of a jerk, and collect 10%.
Why is his name Nails?
serious question: what are the odds LD could land the UBS director gig?
This picture is gayer than Elton John’s house on Christmas Eve.
@12 100 to 1
that picture = my new background
-gay banker who likes his partners retarded and bankrupt
never gonna happen. he’s done.
i have this next to my Bo Jackson “Black and Blue” poster.
That is a picture of Lenny Dykstra.
Art Director: “Why the hell is his shirt off, we’re taking team pictures today”
Photographer: “This is a compromise -before you got here he wasn’t wearing any pants”
Art Director: “really”
Photographer: “oh yeah…and the nickname ‘nails’…more like ‘tac’
Art Director: “oh no you didn’t!”
Photographer: “oh yes I did!”
Art Director: “Come here and kiss me”
Photographer: “Done! Lenny can I borrow you’re lube?”
When my @$$ was 19 years old, I changed the face of professional baseball. I was handed the keys to the kingdom, multi-million dollar deals, endorsements. Everyone wanted a piece of my $h*t. Just a man with a mind for victory and an arm like a fu*king cannon. But sometimes when you bring the thunder, you get lost in the storm.
-LD
That posture has inspired me to lose 50 pounds and declare bankruptcy
@18 – Thank you Mr. Helper!!
I’m looking good, got a luscious v of hair going through my chest pubes down to my ball fro. She takes one look at me and goes ” Oh my god, I’ve had the old bull now I want the young calf” and grabs me by the weiner.
I used to think life was like a game of baseball. And that hardwork and moxy could get you anywhere. Investing isn’t really like baseball at all it turns out. The two are really quite different. I’ll sell you my blood for $5…how about a, trade, i’m starving.
Looks like Lenny really did lose his shirt!!!
~Dumb Joke Guy
He should get a tetanus shot.
@19 well done
@19 ftw
it moved
when is his training video coming out?
NAILS
- No Actual Intelligence, Lost Savings
homo-erotic pictures of bankrupt ex-baseball players is the new killin’ it.
I’ve got an arm like a cannon, a cock like a python, and a mind of a scientist.
-LD
baseball sucks
DB commenter: When you did steroids, did they make your balls shrink?
Lenny Dykstra: Oh, you think that’s funny? How ’bout I show you my balls right now and you can tell me if they shrunk, huh? No, for your information, I have full-size balls. Next question.
The pouty look, cocked hip, well defined pecs and slight dusting of hair make it look just like a porn dvd cover. It just needs a more provocative title -”Balls” maybe. Thanks. I now have a raging hard on. This is better than Tanner. More please.
- another homo banker
I’d hit it.
-larry summers
Nails.
“1986 called and wants its nails back” SNL
@37
Dont you mean “Id “nail” it?”
The scene Bernie Madoff will be facing in federal prison.
Didn’t I bang Donald Trump like, 6 times?
Brando
@40
No.
-larry summers
@31, very funny.
This guy was a jerkoff when he was playing, hes just carrying it over into his retired life. He eats a shotgun within 6 months,
I dont make money I print it, Im the anti-Nails
Greg, I love you, I think you’re a terrific girl, but you got clothes like a fucking dickhead.
-LD
Cigarettes aren’t the only thing Keith Hernandez smokes
MBA, CFA, or Dykstra?
“Do these cleats make me look gay?”
@48 – no, the oiled chest does.
Steve Carlton, I’ll still stick him.
@47 ftw
49 As do those smears under the eyes. Do they have a name? I’m gay, haven’t a clue. I do know though that they put them on the actors in every jock-themed gay porn movie, probably to make them look butch. But then they start talking and the fantasy fades fast.
I’m still hot from this though.
- another homo banker
Behind the scenes of the photo shoot…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x81F28kPXuo
Favorite Pitch: Inside Assball
“A true champion, face to face with his darkest hour, will do whatever it takes to rise above. A man fights, and fights, and then fights some more. Because surrender is death, and death is for pussies.”
- Kenny Powers
“You pitch and I’ll catch”
-Lenny “A Bottom” Dykstra
“You think I’m going away quietly? You think I’m gonna sell insurance? You think I’m gonna quote bid/asks on natural gas costless collars? You think I’m going to be a crude oil buyer? You think I’m just going to fade away like some skid mark on 9 day old underwear? Fuck you…I’m Kenny Powers and I’m here to stay!”
~Kenny Powers
Lenny is looking forward to a Super Bowl between the Oilers and the Packers.
-an old In Living Color reference.
I enjoy getting to third so Davey can put the squeeze play on for me and visualizing world peace
this is not the sorta thing you wanna see early (relatively speaking) in the morning with a massive hangover, damn you levin!
I recognize this photo from the Tobacco Growers Association’s “Got Dip?” campaign.
Anyone know where I can find the John Kruk companion poster where he’s lathered in pine tar?
58- Antoine Merriweather is that you? 2 snaps up!
@58 – you know if Lenny played football, he’d be a tight end.
Three snaps in a Z formation – the Zorro snap.
11 cuz his johnson looks like a nail.
Jim Cramer
@20 – I guess no one here watches Eastbound and Down…
@66 – wrong, we watch eastbound, its just that that exact comment was posted like 12 times yesterday.
Leads the league in balls on the chin
Why is there blue shit on your face Cramer? What, did you just blow Robocop?
@66- you mean other than @20, @33, @45, @55, and @57 and the fact that KP quotes are fairly played out? Other than that, then yes, no one here watches Eastbound and Down.
Bess, do we have a winner yet?
http://men.style.com/gq/features/full?id=content_8558
From a former Dykstra employee:
Includes such precious gems as:
“I’m working with Lenny,” I say. It is now 3 a.m. I tell Lenny that I need to be on the three-ten train back to Long Island.
Dude, I’ll put you in a car and send you home when we’re done,” he says. This sounds like a sweet deal—the only time I’d been offered a late-night car home on the Post’s dime was when the pope died.
We shake hands, and Lenny gives me a little wink. As I get ready to leave, he asks how much a taxi to Long Island will cost. Between $50 and $100, I say. Lenny pulls out his wallet, removes a crisp $100, and hands it to me. “You got $50 change?” he asks.
@72 – you are a scholar and a gentleman. Well done.
I think this is perhaps the best line in the whole piece. Really sums up the situation:
“The whole idea, Lenny said, was to teach young pros the financial savvy they’d need to afford a lifetime of the luxurious lifestyle that Lenny K. Dykstra himself now enjoyed.”
60 Speak for youself
- another homo banker
Lenny had a stroke, right?
my wood from seeeing that picture is larger than what he holds in his hands..
Why so serious?
-J.
Seen: Dykstra takes a bat to his earning.
Seen: Dykstra takes a bat to his earnings
The strangest part of working at The Players Club, though, is Lenny’s adolescent antics. Editorial “brainstorming sessions,” fueled by Coca-Cola and ice cream sundaes, typically last until dawn. But this does not mean things are getting done. Most meetings are simply extended hang-out sessions, with Lenny cracking up at his own jokes or asking us to watch the Real Sports segment over and over, especially the moment where Lenny points to his seat on his private plane and says, “This is where the Big Man sits.” He also seems to relish letting go a long, leisurely fart for the amusement of his employees or showing off his silk tie and saying, “You see this tie? I paid $500 for it” as he rubs it on his crotch and laughs at our embarrassed expressions.
19 is killing it.
19 is Killing It.(tm)
(fixed)
fuckin haters, you know I look damn good.
-LD
what, you’d rather see Larry Summers in that pose? that’s what I thought.
-L DYKES
Let me clarify something. When I said “Lenny Dykstra is one of the greats in this business,” I didn’t mean one of the greats in the investing business, I meant one of the greats in the retarded gay porn business. Do you see the distinction?
–Jim Cramer
I’ve jacked it to this poster 8 times this afternoon alone.
-J CRAMER
I’ve jacked it to this poster 8 times this afternoon alone.
-J CRAMER
I’ve jacked it to this poster 8 times this afternoon alone.
-J CRAMER
I’ve also sucked my own cock to this pic, which is different than jacking it.
-JC
kiss my ask and suck my dick, everyone.
-LD
Protein shake anyone?
CG
Or “Protein Shake, it does a body good”
CG
@12 FTW!!!!!!
Just beat off to this thing one more time.
-LD
Don’t forget to cup the balls, Lenny.
~Ma Dykstra
Next year’s smash hit on FOX:
Lenny and Ruth Maddoff try their hand at running a swank Cleavland beauty salon, but the fun spills into the night, since they live together above the salon!
Lenny and Ruth – Broken Nails…
@96 Leads league in balls in the chin
wow.
-mrp